บท 111: Reassurance
The next day Ezra went back to the lab. He couldn't think straight he was bothered by the events of the night before. He couldn't focus on his experiments, that night he had a tonne of ideas for making use of the discoveries he had but in the present he became restless, instead of overseeing the tests, he let Aegeus run the experiments by himself and he ended up going to the quarters set up on the first floor of his lab.
He went to his desk to prepare for the lecture he would conduct the next day. He knew that he shouldn't force himself to do things especially, when it came to actual testing because it might skew the results.
There were still many mysteries hidden in the depths of magic, more ideas on how to convert energy and use it for electricity. With the new discovery of magic conductivity, he had envisioned magic powered combustion engines, the conductivity aided in flexibility of where he could put the magic source, which was a problem with typical magic crystals and cores. There was still a problem with uniformity of distribution in the steel itself. Once the crystal dust imbued steel was set, the whole alloy would come a flame, which was the main problem, but he was already figuring out a counter to this problem.
He had already laid the foundations and had drawn the plans for constructing a power grid the third-generation steam turbine he had was already hidden away in his experimental farm. He planned to use the new technology for this turbine.
He was in a dilemma right now. He was thinking if the Emperor could be trusted, because if he implemented these plans it was certain that it would attract attention. The emperor was a powerful ally, but there were still some doubts in his mind. What prompted the Emperor exactly to betroth Hestia to himself? When in fact shortly before the betrothal, from what he understood, Reitz fell from the Emperor's graces.
He couldn't concentrate because of this. As he was lost in thought, the door creaked open.
"Father, what brings you here? I thought you still had duties today, is something of the problem?"
Reitz had a solemn looking face, but overall the expression looked confusing. It seemed that he was very bothered by something.
"Ezra, we need to talk." Reitz's speech was stern yet contemplative.
As Ezra saw this, he became curious. "What about," Ezra asked as he raised an eyebrow.
"It's about Hearth," Reitz paused waiting for a reaction from Ezra.
"First, let me ask you a question father," Ezra spoke.
"Ask away."
"Is it fair that Hearth jeopardized the security of Bren and Fulmen?"
Reitz froze," Well,"
Ezra's tone was icy, "All of you were present except mother when I told you how dangerous it was if someone saw the gun. I even let all of you fire one bullet each to get a feel for it. It was before Hestia arrived remember? What part was I not clear in? You all saw how powerful the damned gun was. It could penetrate almost anything except for the bulletproof I made."
"Actually, I wasn't there when you told them how much each bullet costs so. . "
"That's not the point father, the point is that I want to teach Hearth a lesson, I know he is the son of your closest friend, but he is my vassal now and under my jurisdiction,"
Reitz opened his mouth to speak but he was lost for words.
His voice quivered for a moment, "W-was I wrong father?" he looked at the walls as if to speak to someone ethereal, "was I wrong to trust people? Was I wrong to give them such a responsibility? Was I wrong to entrust them with the future? Was I wrong with entrusting them the knowledge that I have?" Ezra's voice made a ghostly echoed that bounced off the walls.
He now understood what bothered him, the reason why he couldn't stand through the experiments he designed despite his curiosity. Why he lacked drive to complete the plans he had. He was poisoned by doubt.
Reitz eyes met his with a stare. "The problem with people son, is that they always make mistakes. They do stupid things for stupid reasons. They're weak, they're prone to do selfish things. They are greedy, they lie, they cheat. They are but feeble creatures, prone to be subjects to the whims of their desires. Yes, this is the weakness of people," Reitz nodded firmly clasping the shoulder of Ezra and looking into his eyes.
"My son, if we focus on the evil that lingers within us, the malevolence that tries to consume us, If we succumb to it we become but lesser men akin to beasts. If we focus on the possibility that all men are as such, then we fall in to despair, with no hope. It will warp our minds and this very attitude shall make kingdoms fall and chaos to reign." Reitz voice commanded nobility.
Ezra just sat and looked back at his father and listened to him, his face was expressionless.
"However, people are more than their dark desires. In this turmoil of weakness, they also find their strength. The capacity for people to go beyond their depravity, to overcome their weaknesses, to become noble, to forgive, to help their fellow men, to show compassion and kindness, to become more than who they were, to become better men. That is their ultimate strength.
"The capacity to judge good and evil, to decide to do right than to follow the much easier path of wrong. That is the paramount potential of men, and that is why we forgive, my son. Because we know people have the aptitude to change. Enlighten a sinner and show him his sins and he might choose to live the right way.
"People become weak, become vile or evil through the course of their lives, but through their own choices they can become something more, something truly transcendent." Reitz nodded firmly
Ezra just fell silent when hearing his father's words, he felt the strength of his fathers grip on his shoulder, as if to reassure Ezra and calm his doubts.
"To trust is not weakness my son, it is a strength. Far easier for a man to do things on his own than it is to put faith in the actions of others, this deed is an act of hope, hope that in the future, one is not alone for he has someone to share the burdens they bear. Hope that when imminent tribulation comes, we have at least a shoulder to ease our yolk."
Ezra's eyes became downcast.
"I just, I don't want to be wrong. I don't want to put any of your lives in jeopardy just because I made a wrong decision."
"Ezra, my son, the pride of my power, let me assure you, that trusting your comrades is not wrong. People make mistakes. Yes, including you," Reitz chuckled at his own statement. "It is also not wrong to forgive, yes, punishments are in order. But that doesn't mean you should not trust Hearth again. He made mistakes, yes, but he can change for the better. He knows that he erred."
Ezra nodded slowly.
"It's' just that . . . I feel that If I make a fatal mistake, I might put everyone in danger. I don't want to lose anyone again," Ezra became teary eyed once more, he was still traumatized by his decision when he left for Anticourt when he was two.
"I have come to enjoy everyone's company. I like laughing with you, being around with you and mom. I like sharing my knowledge with my friends and teaching people. I like bettering the lives of people around me. I just don't want to ever loose that. I am grateful, I am so grateful that I have you, that I have a family and friends, that I have been born into this world." Ezra came close to hug his father.
"I feel that sometimes the burden I bear is too huge, I cannot sacrifice that, I cannot endanger that," he hugged Reitz tightly as he thought of the commission that Evan had given him. It still echoed in the recesses of his mind, "change the world."
Reitz chuckled and hugged back as he messed up his son's hair. "Didn't you listen to what I say? I told you if the burden is too high, you can trust others. I am here, your mother is here. You have your vassals and friends. They can lighten the load." Reitz smiled.
"Life is full of sacrifices. It isn't honey and roses, that is why we have choices. We sacrifice enjoyment of the present to have a better future. I came here my son to finally tell you the truth."
"What do you mean?" Ezra wiped his eyes with his sleeve.
"I know the reason Hearth acted that way. I know why he chose to do a stupid thing, I know his secret. Often there are reasons for acting foolishly. I'm not saying that it was not bad or imprudent. I'm just saying he has a reason." Reitz wore his somber expression again.
Ezra perked up his ears.
"Hearth is actually a bastard you see." Reitz eyes stared at a distance.
"What? How come? I've seen him his magic aura is actually stronger than nobles his age!" Ezra voice was incredulous.
"He is the offspring of Aaron and Terrane, Aaron's second cousin, he swapped the boy when his first wife's was son was still born as she fainted during child birth,"
"I, I see, no wonder." Ezra nodded.
"Do you understand now? He acted like that because Caspian was discovered to be a pure blood. He went on a rampage because fate is too cruel to him," Reitz shook his head," Aaron entrusted Hearth to me, he's hoping he can settle things so that Hearth can be acknowledged as a pureblood so that he can inherit Abrosite. That boy didn't deserve any of this nonsense Aaron had gotten himself into," Reitz sighed.
"I shall lighten the punishment of Hearth, I think a month of hard labor will suffice. I need lab hands as well. As for the lashings. Hmm I think fifteen lashings are in order, instead of the five per day, I planned to lower the sentence anyway I was just threatening him, on the third day of the lashings I wouldn't have let them continue anyway," Ezra spoke with a lighter tone.
Reitz nodded.
"Now, my son, I shall take my leave. I hope that I have set things in order."
"Yes dad, thanks,"
Reitz hugged his son again after which he walked out the room.
Ezra went back to making his lecture, fully relieved of the weight he had on his heart.
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