For me this story is so good, the description , plot, mc and etc
I see that your skill already improve bro, but I suggest you to improve your skill for making dialogue
people dislike if you make the dialogue like that, don't ever use : but just use "ABC"Samuel claps shania's shoulder and greets him "Hey bro" then he continue "Wanna take a lunch together"Shania looks at Samuel's smiles and it make his heart beating so fast "s-sure" he replied.
Este livro foi excluído.
too long for one paragraph, make one paragraph consist only 3-5 sentances
Este livro foi excluído.
thanks for your comment, I hope you enjoy the story
On my way to the adventure guild, I met my childhood friend, Zelta. She lived near my house and had the same fate as me; we had both lost our parents. Zelta had long, straight, silver hair, silver eyes, white skin, and a slim body. She was beautiful to me, and I wanted to protect her smile.
Fantasy · Tama_Kun
good concept . I do love the way you make Phoenix as the concept
Este livro foi excluído.
well, Al himself only love zelta, but he don't have enough braveness to confess. In other side, Zelta always give him a signal that she love Al, but Al never realized it. What will happen in the future? will Al realize that Zelta loves him? Let's enjoy the story
Thank you for reading. I do understand that the early chapter is not enough good because I still newbie in that time. I hope you can still enjoy the story.
Thank you for reading
Ethan.... I think all author in WN run out of name for male MC. almost every novel I opened, and I find Ethan 😂
Rise of Power: Journey of Kingdoms
Fantasy · Warrior_Blade