I just did, thanks for the suggestion, sorry if any confusion happened
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No harem, no romance as of now
It's OK nothing special
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He made it, just like his house and his former tent
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No he's obviously not, it's just his knowledge of the one piece world and swordsmen
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Thanks a lot for the review, you have no idea how much it means to me. As for the fighting experience, he literally has a couple set of moves from the manual that he uses, if he wants to dodge he will do 'this move' , if he wants to counter attack or retreat he will do 'that move'. I actually read a couple days ago an article about how a beginner swordsman would literally beat someone who trained for like 8 to 9 months, because the former's movements will be unpredictable. So there's really not much difference between Matthew's actual 'fighting skills' and the current opponents. Again thanks a lot for commenting on my work, it really helps, I often wonder if people actually read my book.
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It's meant to be something that he has already, it's just his memory getting in the way. About the effect tho, it's not really that powerful, I just wanted to give him a cool bloodlust or killing intent.
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Your work actually inspired me to start my own one piece fanfic, it's probably not gonna catch up to your quality but hey, I'm gonna keep trying, 😘😘😘
Loving your work so far man you're amazing.
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original One piece: madman
For the young Matthew 'red beast' roberts, life seems boring to him, being unsuccessfull is finding a job and struggling to pay his bills constantly, puts him under pressure to make his life better, after a meeting with his high-school buddy, things took a turn for the worst, and now he finds himself in an island in faraway yet familiar world. Follow his journey as he slowly descends into insanity while venturing the world of one piece ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -no harem or romance as of now. -(+18) for mature dark themes and profane language. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Just a few notes before you read: -This story happens years before cannon and it might deviate a tiny bit from it. -haki powers are kinda unique in this small world I built up, not like what you would see in the anime. For example: people can see visions in their sleep with observation. People can even use telekinesis with Conqueror's. -expect a lot of oc's with their characters slowly fleshed out. And multiple person pov's -I strive to make the world a little bit more realistic and dark. Once again, a little bit different than the regular one piece world. And lastly please enjoy. I merely write for fun so hmm... What was the saying? take everything with a grain of salt :)0 Chs 196 Coleções
Well it's definitely the author's first work, I can tell. I do applaud you wholeheartedly for actually sticking to the story and actually following an upload schedule. Well with that out of the way, I would like to offer some suggestions. The grammar itself isn't the worst. Obviously there are mistakes here and there (mainly about punctuation and sentence structure) but that's about the average quality you can find on webnovel so I wouldn't fault you. You are writing in first person POV which is really good for a character driven writing style, but the problem is that you need to include more descriptive language into your writing to make us engaged with the story as well as adhering to 'show don't tell' thing. You see, humans have 5 senses, but you only describe what the mc sees and exclude hearing and smelling completely which otherwise could have helped in making your world feel alive (here you can also use metaphors and comparisons like many authors do). You should also include more internal monologues so that at the very least make him somewhat entertaining to read, as well as slow down the pace a bit to make actions feel natural.
Beyond the Pages : The Author's Requiem
Fantasy · Iwantocook