Capítulo 65: Chapter sixty-three
The rain feels satisfyingly cool as each drop seeps through my shirt, plastering it to my skin. I'll be soaked in less than a minute, but it is no matter to me as Tasmin draws closer to me under the twinkling glow of fairy lights. The second that brings me from an appropriate distance to less than an inch from her face feels like an eternity, and then all I can see are the glittery lights in her eyes, multicoloured pinpricks in circular seas of bluebell water. My cheeks feel hot, even as the rain trickles over them, and they grow hotter when my mind reminds me of Ally.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Ally exclaimed, gesturing gracefully to our lush green surroundings and the thick canopy hiding dozens of musical birds overhead.
It really was amazing. I couldn't tear my eyes away from any of it, and when Ally started to twirl around, dancing, I couldn't keep myself from staring at her, eyes following her movements. When I finally did look away, she was laughing, and then she had her arms around me, and I couldn't contain the awkwardness.
"How l-long have you known about this place?" I had asked to break the deepness of the embrace.
I was relieved when Ally slipped away and started wandering. I followed close behind her, taking in a breath of nature. Damp moss, lavender flowers, a hint of the sweet scent of honey.
It took her a long moment to respond, and when she did, her voice was filled with reluctance. "My, um… father… He brought me here."
I understood immediately. Her father, much like mine, was a good man in his occupation, who loved his wife and child, but couldn't seem to provide the love and care to his family. Ally's family had once been perfect, unlike mine. Her mother had been joyful, nurturing, caring. Her father had been dedicated, optimistic, idolistic. And Ally had been happy. Completely satisfied. But then her father had an affair, and her parents' relationship tore into jagged pieces, never to be mended. While her mother and father dealt with their divorce, Ally was left in the insignificant middle. When her parents did split, she moved equally between houses, but that only continued until her father began to become blunt, disagreeable, aggressive, unfair. And when Ally discovered that even her mother wouldn't do much to change for her daughter, she began to hide. Returning home later, leaving home earlier, speaking less, doing more. She missed the days when she could dance freely around her home without fear, but each day dulled the pain. That was until she found Reprisal, and Boss, who promised he would help her no matter what.
Ally turned towards me, dark eyes lit up under the soft rays of golden sunshine seeping through the tangle of leaves above. Her dress was blowing gently in the breeze, and as she lowered herself to observe a flower amongst the tufts of grass, I realised that my heart was thumping fast, my eyes were wide as saucers, and my legs had brought me onto the patch right in front of her. She merely glanced at me as she pulled my hands out in front of me, cupping them into a bowl-shape for her flowers. When I wouldn't pull my eyes from her, she murmured, "For a flower crown."
I remember nodding stupidly. Was this how my father felt when he looked at my mother?
I wanted to lean forward and close the gap between us. I wanted to feel the brush of her chocolate brown hands, soft on my skin. I wanted to feel her eyelashes flutter closed as I combed the small flowers through her frizzy hair. And maybe I wanted to forget the mission, and just lay with Ally here, surrounded by the green nature and the eternal musical cooing of birds.
A second passes like a millenia, but that's all it takes for me to lose all sense of anything and press my lips to her cheek. From here, the space between her cheek and her lips seems as long as a country road. So far apart, the red floods my cheeks as embarrassment overtakes.
Slowly, hesitantly, I pull away, stepping back. Tasmin stands in front of me, eyes wide, hand slack in my damp grip. I let go.
"Sorry," I say. I can't tell you yet. I can't say why. And I shouldn't be near you. Her lips move, but she doesn't say anything. And I fear that if I stick around to listen, I won't be able to leave. I have so much to say, but my mind is an explosion of uncertainties. My mother left so suddenly, and now it's my turn. "Sorry," I repeat.
I leave Tasmin, the twinkle in her eyes duller than before. The pang of guilt hits hard when I make it to Deck fourteen. I need to find Ally, but I don't know where she'd be at this hour. Most likely sleeping soundly under the warmth of her covers. And that's where I wanna be. Not under her covers, but my own, back in the home that never felt like a home after my mother left.
I'm soaked, head to toe, and my shoes squelch obnoxiously in the empty halls of the cruise. They're almost as loud as the thumping of my heart, the rush of my adrenaline.
I need to make things right.
Ally would somehow make things right. She'll call me a goof, pull me closer, and lay motherly pats on my head.
No, I need to do it myself.
I recall Ally's advice to give Tasmin a gift. But how the hell am I supposed to approach Tasmin now, after I've completely lost it in front of her, when everything seemed to be going right for once?
I have to try.
As I pull out my wallet, a pruny note skitters to the floor, weighted by the reservoir of rainwater in my jeans. I know immediately what it is and who it's from.
0606
7
Sunset photos with friends, replaced by an embrace under the young sun
Presentes
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recebido Status de energia semanal
-- Ranking de
Poder 
-- Pedra de
Poder