Sinopse
Check out my other novels -
|Arpious of the Planes|
|My Ares System|
|Warlock of Wisdom: My Odin System|
--
Same Universe -
|Arpious of the Planes|
-------------------------------------------------------------------
3/21/25, in other words, it was March the 21st, 2025. Humanities technology advanced exponentially throughout the years.
The only thing that they hadn't focused on for a while was space. The endless abyss that they call space was still unknown to them.
Once they colonized their solar system, they thought it wasn't enough. They sent a search party out of their solar system but soon lost contact.
Not long after, Earth lost contact with all of the other planets. Then a huge earthquake shook the earth itself and then portals opened up around the world. Soon monsters came out ravaging and flattening cities.
Only a brave group of humans entered the portals which they then found multiple discoveries on the other side. They found stones that gave them different abilities and monsters a different world with a boss that lets them exit the portal, which was soon called dungeons.
Those 6 friends were then later on called the 6 Primordial Braves.
With the news of this, countries all over the world sent in people to retrieve stones, and then they would crush them, granting them abilities. They would then go back in to retrieve more and hand them out to the public.
500 years passed...
This isn't the story of a hero. It's the story of a weak girl who was ridiculed and bullied every day because of her low status. And due to her cowardly nature, she was unable to fight back, making more people pick on her.
While she was laying in an alleyway, with bruises and cuts all over her body, she saw a green, semi-see-through panel that appeared in front of her. It was like a notification you would see in the VR games from 400 years back. The green panel had a black text that said...
[Would you like to become an Ancient Being?]
-------------------------------------------------------------------
!Spoiler Below!
.
.
.
At the beginning of the novel, there will be a lot of going back and forth between the MC's personality. Plus, most of the problems, in the beginning, will be centered around herself.
Also, at the beginning of the novel, there is an act of short and sweet revenge that lingers just a bit longer through the story, but this novel is not revenge-based.
The Yuri aspect won't be as heavily used compared to my first novel. The girlfriend is mainly used to help the MC get through the mental box and distorted feelings that the MC has to suffer through at the beginning of the novel.
You might dislike the characters that I made Lucy's friends, but I promise you'll change your mind later on. I think...
Okay, that should be it!
Phew... that was tiring. Time to drink my fourth cup of coffee today...
-------------------------------------------------------------------
500 Power Stones by the weekend = 1 extra chapter
750 Power Stones by the weekend = 2 extra chapters
--
Twitter - @equuipwebnovel
Discord - equuip#6686
--
paypal.me/AuthorEquuip
Any money you send will help me hire people to create new covers for my novels.
--
Cover is not mine. If the owner wants it removed, plz contact me through discord (Rarely check twitter).
Source- https://www.deviantart.com/aoiogataartist/journal/Aoi-Ogata-PAYPAL-Commission-OPEN-828543085
Tags
Fãs
-
![fuqdisappngl]()
fuqdisappngl Contribuído 8505 -
![Franklin_Walley]()
Franklin_Walley Contribuído 7106 -
![Witcher101]()
Witcher101 Contribuído 6953
Presentes
-- Presente
recebido Status de energia semanal
-- Ranking de
Poder 
-- Pedra de
Poder Você também pode gostar
38Opiniões
4.72
- Qualidade de Escrita
- Estabilidade das atualizações
- Desenvolvimento de Histórias
- Design de Personagens
- Antecedentes do mundo
Compartilhe seus pensamentos com outras pessoas
Escreva uma avaliação
*heavy spoilers btw* *Warning: most of this are my personal opinions* -The novel idea and lore is good. -The writing is good but could need better explanation and smoother actions. I need to process the actions between paragraph sometimes. -The story get real weird after the auction house chapter(22+). There are sudden unrealistic romances, sudden mysterious organization etc. -The solutions sometimes feels too plot-armored like having 600 years old mom. -The MC has severe trust issues and PTSD but not enough paranoia and too clueless about the world. She also turn cold blooded from not wanting to kill pretty fast. super unstable. -The MC somehow has quite a lot of rich young master friends. -The city lacked security even in a technologically advanced yet devastated world. 600 years are really long ya know. That's all I could think of for now. Awaiting further developments. Overall I'm giving it 4 5 3 2 4 respectively for a total of 3.6/5.
Revelar Spoiler
The story was quite good, at least up to the point where romance was introduced. Well, let's go to some strong and weak points of the story shall we? Pros: World Building; the world building aspect is quite unique, and it's seen through the eyes of the protagonist, though of course because of this the development of world building would be quite slow and the world isn't exactly fully explained but it gives off a sense of mystery which I quite like but it may not be for everyone. Oh also the story's take on the system is great. 4.6/5 Writing Quality; the paragraphs are very readable, the uses of words is alright, and there are only few grammatical errors. 4.2/5 Updates; This is self explainable, it updates every other day. 4.4/5 Now onto why this story got such a bad score; the Cons: Story Development; now mind you, I was going to originally give this a 4.6 or even 4.7 but then the romance part happen. The pacing is just right and it isn't rushed and slow in any way, there are few plot holes. The problem here is the romance, it's too rushed and by that I mean way too rushed. Sure it's tagged yuri and it'll come eventually but at least you should do so naturally. The romance seems forced, and as of now it doesn't at all fit. 3/5 Characters; Oh boy, do I have a lot to say about this one. Let's first go over the protagonist, a cold, somewhat calculating, and at first extremely revenge driven person. But then Chapter 43 happens and most of her personality is thrown out of the window, You don't just go from potential enemy to pawn and then straight up to lovers. That's not how relationships work, nor how a human mind work either. She's written to have trust issues and seem manipulating, so why just suddenly drop it all instead of developing everything instead? As for the other side characters we have seen way too little of them for me to properly rate the others but for now. 1.8/5 Overall the story is quite good, though weighted down by the sudden massive break of character and romance. Total score: 3.6/5
The novel was incredible, I was really liking everything until Tiana appeared and everything lost meaning to me once she admits to being emotionally manipulating the MC sincerely the novel is incredible but I can't stand this character of Tiana
More chapters plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz😄
I fell in love with the first 70~ish % of volume one, was sorta okay with the remaining 30% and I'm kind of struggling with volume two. Now disclaimer: I'm just not really a fan of kingdom/organization building. Much like Arpious this starts as a sort of progression litrp for the first volume or so until it starts leaning harder into kingdom building sort of stuff. I personally just don't find the genre that interesting, it generally spends a significant amount of time developing side characters I'm not really interested in, and it usually means stunting the main characters growth (in both strength and personality, just because they start getting a lot less screen time) because the side characters need to catch up in order to participate. Which is kinda what happens here. Kind of abruptly all 11 of Lucy's friends also become overpowered ancient beings and a couple chapters later they all get a new evolution while Lucy gets a pittance of xp, and then a couple of chapters later everyone gets yet another evolution while Lucy gets almost halfway to her next one. If everyone's special, nobody really is. Putting aside the astronomical odds that everyone in their group just so happens to be descended from gods/mythical-beings/etc. It kind of cheapens Lucy's experiences when everyone just kinda gets it handed to them at much lower cost. I get why it was done, and a lot of novels do this too, but it always feels kind of lame when it happens. Too many characters in the kitchen: there's like 12 girls leading their organization including Lucy, and 2 more that are executives. I honestly struggle to remember much about any of them to differentiate aside from Mia, Sophia, and Charlotte, the former cause she's the love interest and had a much larger role in volume one, and the latter two oddly enough because they're NOT part of the main group. As an aside here, they have a sort of hivemind thing going on, which triggers in fight scenes. Meaning we watch from Lucy's pov as she rapidly cycles through the povs of the other girls, leaving you kinda confused as you're trying to remember who uses what weapon, who has what powers, who's positioned where. Granted, it was cool the first time it happened, and kind of annoying subsequently. Volume two kinda marks the end of 'Rise of Quetzlcoatl' and it starts being 'Rise of Tolf'. Cause the story isn't really about Lucy or Quetzlcoatl anymore. We start seeing povs of other characters a lot more often, Lucy herself kind of becomes a lot less interesting, certain threads from book one kinda just go poof cause of the relocation and time skip, Romance/smut stuff becomes more prevalent, which isn't good or bad, I'm just asexual and don't really have an interest in any of it Tl;Dr I came for the premise, stayed for Lucy's story, mildly disappointed when it became something else. Overall it's still better than most web serials I've read and you'll probably have a great time unless you have more weird hangups than I do.
Revelar Spoiler
Only 10 chapters are out so far, but I am looking forward to more. Plot is good and you get attached to the MC quick. I myself can't wait for the MC to get revenge as well get stronger. Gonna be a good novel I want more.
I like the story so far and the characters are likable too especially the MC. I dont have any complaints but I have curiosity. Its just I always wonder who will be Lucy’s future partner/lover. I mean it has a yuri tag on it.
It's good no obvious mistakes needs more chapter for more judgment i like it for now. Also when will she get her noble phantasm? (~^. ^)~(~^. ^)~(~^. ^)~(~^. ^)~(~^. ^)~(~^. ^)~(~^. ^)~
15 chapters in and im absolutely loving it. I love the MC and how she’s changed and adapted to become strong. Very excited to see how conflicts evolve. The only thing Id change about this novel is even more chapters being released. Cant wait to read more
read your other book and thought let's go read this one. I love this one. .. .............................................................
Looking forward to future chapters. Please take my power stones IfifufufjfufudktsitskgakgsitzktzktzkgxkgzkgxkgxlyxlgxkgxlgxlyxlgxlgzlgxlhgHd
author, I found this by chance, but I think you should've posted this on ML not FL. this may have done much better. Yuri and LitRPG are generally for the ML fandom. You can change this by contacting your CE
I think the writing can be a little bit confusing at time (just an opinion) overall loved the story .. and writing would be cool if we dove in the lore of the world a bit more like the gods and the monsters
I cant seem to read the Last 2 chapters even though I paid for privilged to be able to read them I really enjoy this and need to read more chapters [img=update][img=update]
What words to describe how much of a masterpiece this is... I want to write a decently long detailed review but I feel lazy so... uhh... I'll just point out random things I guess. First things first... YURI!!! I have a serious addiction to yuri, everything I read is good but when there's no yuri it just feels so... lacklustre? Like, everytime I read some romcom novel where It's F x M, I feel like, sure, IT IS great, but like, I feel like it doesn't make me as happy and excited as yuri could. The writing is, what can I say, It's higher than the word highest. Although there were a few misplelled words, there was nothing wrong with the grammar. The characters are also just fantastic! I mean, white haired female MCs are just the best and nothing could change my mind about it. The personality is, uhh, a bit...confusing? Well, sometimes. I just felt like her personality changes WAY TOO MUCH and TOO FAST. It's probably because of my reading speed and the story's time skips, my excitement is also a variable since the more excited I am the more I would want even more of this novel. Like, if I read every chapter and there was no more chapters to read, I'll probably be in agony saying how "I'M DYING FROM BOREDOM! I NEED MORE CHAPTERS!" But, well, I also know authors are human not some restless robots and so I just try to convince myself that there will, hopefully, another chapter fast. I feel like I have more to say but I think this is enough. All I can really say right now is that this is worth reading and you'll regret it if you don't read this. So why not give it a try?! If you like it after reading, why not support by stones, rewiew or gifts to motivate author to continue doing a great job!
This will be interesting if this rushed romance successfully end up good because most of the rush romance I've known didn't end up good. So please continue updating more chapters I want more action and especially yuri for my imagination.😊😊
Very easy read. No glaring mistakes. My only complaint would be about the character since she feels way too nonchalant about everything. Sure, she gets sick and disgusted, but the writing of the story prevents that emotions from getting to the reader. I do like the world and system. The plot seems fine too.
I've read until 600. The world building is good. There are times when it gets boring but not repetitive. The story doesn't stay in one spot for too long(which I think at least is a plus). Their of course, are Arcs they're good. The story stays at a steady paste. Chapter development is not in detail, and you just don't know some/most personalities but characters even when their an important chapter. Their are parts in the story where they change the POV a bit too many times and their are times when I don't even know which character's POV we're on.(Of course the Author puts in who's POVit is, but there's times when it goes on to for too long and I lose track. All in all it it's a decent read. P.S. The only reason I read this was I wasn't able to find anything I liked or found interesting enough.
I like this story .. the background is also more extensive, especially I like the Yuri + Action genre, I'm also looking forward to future developments ..