Capítulo 19: Chapter 19
Macey
My fist lands hard against the leather, pain ignites within my arm, but I ignore it, pushing past the pain to get to the depths of my anger.
It's been four days since Michael, and I had our heart to heart atop Old Creek hill starring out upon an amazing view of broken memories.
Since then, I have spent each and every afternoon here at Michael's home, toning in on my anger and hatred for my past and letting it out through a mix of workouts, training and hikes. Throughout all of this, Michael has been my rock. Between work and picking me up from home to bring me back here and helping me work out my feelings, I feel more and more like my old self each and every day. I speak more, laugh more, even Olga has expressed her appreciation.
"Nice, give me four more and let's take a break."
I don't bother turning around. Michael is a lot like clockwork I've noticed.
At exactly twelve fifteen he leaves the gym and heads upstairs to make us lunch, which is mostly made of our after workout smoothies and a heathy BLT. Something I've quickly learned I love a lot.
We had just gotten back from a run, another thing I have found I love, when Michael took us down here to start our workout. The old me would have despised doing all of this, finding it pointless to even begin worrying about my body, but I've realized that Michael doesn't have all this equipment down here to keep his body in shape, although it's something I've enjoyed starring at, he does it for the mind.
"You're getting better babe." He states, taking in a bite of his ham sandwich. I watch as his jaw moves with force as I attempt to settle my nerves I seem to receive each and every time he uses that endearing word with me.
My attraction to Michael feels like a drumstick is beating hard against my heart, creating my chest to feel a large ache deep in the center. To think I would even be remotely attracted to another man after everything I have been through is strange, but I welcome the normality of it all.
I feel whole around him. I feel protected and cherished, so much so that I find myself wanting our time together to never end.
"Not hungry?" I look down at my plate of a BLT and sliced mango's has been hardly touched. Shrugging my shoulders I bring my gaze back to him.
"I guess not."
"You should still try and eat Whit, need the energy after our morning." Nodding my head, I lean in, taking a bite of my sandwich and look back over at Michael. "You seem distracted today, everything alright?"
I want to lie to him. Tell him that I am fine, just tired. But I promised Michael I would always be honest with him. It's not always easy, and at times I get more frustrated with myself than with him, but I want him to be there for me like he promised days ago.
"I'm worried."
"About yourself?" I shake my head, but he doesn't try guessing again. He's waiting on me to finish my thoughts, something I've noticed he does a lot of.
"About Amelia." When I first met her she had told me about her being in school but that she was also a street kid. She had no family, no one that truly cared for her. So then where the hell was she?
"I'm sure she's fine Whitney. Why don't you eat up?" Narrowing my eyes I push my plate away and stare back at Michael with anger and hinderance. Standing up I head for the door, fed up with the obvious lie he is telling.
"Whit, hey what the hell? Where are you going?" Michael grips my arm pulling me back to look at him. His arms go around my waist keeping me locked in his hold.
"I will not sit here and be lied to. You always want me to be honest with you but here you are lying to me."
"Whit"
"No. You only use my full name when there is something you are hiding from me. If it's about Amelia, I deserve to know."
Michael looks up, taking a deep breath then blows it out but keeps his arms around my body. "You're right, I'm sorry. I'm trying to protect you against this shit but you're right, you do have a right to know." Nodding my head I wait as he continues. "We don't know where Amelia currently is."
My heart nearly falls out of my chest. Panic rises as I am led to the nearby couch. I can feel his gentle hands gently rubbing my back but my fear of not knowing is too overwhelming.
"W-what do you m-mean you d-don't know w-where she is?"
"Fuck babe, I didn't want to have to tell you. Not like this. Amelia went back home to London after you were all released from the center in Alaska, but we kept track of her just in case. A few days shortly after her being home, we got word that she was using, then she disappeared."
"Drugs?" The words sound foreign to me. Master would only give us drugs when he needed to transport us somewhere. We never had access to them when we lived with them, meaning Amelia only got on them for one reason and one reason alone.
She wasn't coping.
"It's m-my fault. I-I should have b-been there for her." More tears pool around my eyes but this time I allow them to run their course.
Michael wraps his body around me, holding me just the way I need, but for once, it's not enough. My friend needed me, and I wasn't there for her. I've been lucky, coming home to two parents that never gave up on me, I had it easy compared to the other girls. Compared to Amelia.
"No babe, it's not your fault. Amelia had a tough time, but her psychiatrist said she behaved better than expected. No one knew her PTSD would come so soon after her release. I have my guy Deek looking into her. We will find her, no matter what."
I try and take in every fragment of his promise praying he could never break it. I think of everyone back there in that mansion that I think of on a daily basis. So many questions rake through my mind and yet I've never asked. In my mind asking means bringing my mind back to those days and I've been running away from those times since I got home.
I give myself a mental note to speak with Olga about all of this. Michael protects me, he's truthful with me about what he can tell me, but because of his job, I know that isn't much. Olga may not have the answers, but she could help me manage my thoughts, especially now that I know of Amelia's disappearance.
"Thank you." I say then pull myself back enough to looks into his eyes. "You've always been honest with me and I don't think I've ever thanked you for that." A shadow comes across his face and for a brief moment Michael looks shaken, but one blink and the persona is gone.
"I'll always be there for you Whit." A small smile graces my face and I watch as Michael's eyes roam over my face, landing on my lips for a brief moment.
Memories of that kiss that seems like so long ago come up to the surface of my mind dipping my thoughts into a pool of need. After Michael broke free of that kiss that day, I thought his attraction to me was over, but right now in this moment, I fell it in full force.
"Michael?" I ask in a soft tone.
"Yes?" He answers, his tone just as soft. His gaze has not pulled away from my lips, I lick them, hearing him groan as he shuts his eyes as if in pain.
"Why won't you kiss me again?"
Michael breaks free from his continuous stare into my lips and stands up, rubbing the back of his neck with his hands. He looks spooked, panicked, obviously thrown off by my bold question. I haven't stopped thinking of his kiss. The heated passion thrown behind his need to engulf his body onto mine. His tongue dancing with mine, the groans and moans we created together. I remember it like a second skin sewn onto mine.
"Whit"
"It's alright if you regret it. I would understand, I'm just looking for an answer."
"It's not that I regret it, I loved what we did, but I just..I don't think we should do it again. Everything you've been through."
And there it is.
Pain ignites within my chest, causing my heart to feel as if it were on fire.
What was I thinking?
I assumed I could have a normal life because he has been kind to me, but I should have known I would never be desired and thought of in any romantic ways. I'm scarred, broken and shattered. I've been used and marred, not one inch of my body hasn't been hurt or abused. To think someone would want me after all of that was pathetic.
I am my master's pet.
I am my master's pet.
"Whit I"
Before he could finish, a rattle hits the front door with force. I jump in my seat but continue to stare at the dark wooden floors. Pushing aside my shame and embarrassment I watch as Michael walks over to the door, mumbling under his breath as he does so. Michael opens the door and looks shocked when his brother is on the other side of it.
Cobi Taylor looks very much like his older brother. I can still remember the moment I saw him and Michael. He was holding a gun towards me, same as Michael, but his demeanor was calmer. After watching them both interact with one another back at the hotel and again in the hospital, I can tell Cobi was the easy going brother while Michael is more of the brute. His dark blonde hair contrasts his big brother's brown shaven one but their eyes, their eyes match completely. He's tall, much like Michael, but slimmer and has a field of tattoos coming down both arms and some around his neck.
"What the hell?" He says, as he walks inside Michael's house and spots me on the couch. "What is she doing here Mike?" His voice lowers along with gaze, as he turns to his brother, keeping his finger pointed right at me.
"Cobi"
"Is this why your fucking work has gone down the drain? You've been here, playing fucking house with her?"
"Will you fucking listen to me."
"No. You know Deek can't get a hold of you for shit? We need to go over our newest findings and come to find out, you've been ignoring all of our calls and messages all this time. I mean what the actual fuck?"
"That's enough. Fuck Cobi, shut the fuck up for once." Michael shouts, causing another jump to leave my body. He walks over to me, my guess to explain some things, but I shake my head, causing him to stop in his tracks before he can reach me.
I can't hear his excuses, my mind and heart too raw. I need to get out of here. I feel sick to my stomach and the last thing I want is to show these powerful men, is just how weak I am.
I am my master's pet
I am my master's pet.
"Please take me home." I say, nearly begging.
"Whit" Another shake of my head, this time accompanied by betraying tears flowing down my cheeks and Michael finally nods his head, giving his brother a death glare before handing me my gym bag located next to the door.
I walk out, passing Cobi and his confused glare, and head right for Michael's car. I hop inside clutching my bag to my chest, attempting to hold in my sobs that so desperately want to come out. Michael gets inside and starts the ignition then pulls out and heads in the direction of my home.
"Tell me your name my pet."
"MaceyMy name is Macey."
I blink back tears that fall over my face and onto the floor. A clearer version of master comes in and watch as a smile graces his face.
A smile.
I have never been able to give him a smile.
"Do you still want this?"
Shaking my head I ignore the pain in my head, hoping to get master to believe me. I will do anything to no longer feel the pain, the agony. I want to rest. Even if that means selling my soul.
"Then you know what you must do."
Nodding my head, I watch as he undresses himself, stroking his cock the moment it's free. I know exactly what master needs of me, what all slaves must give to their owner.
He must have my body, my soul, my mind, my heart.
Master drags me across the floor, flipping me over to my stomach with force. I grunt in pain at the cold cement as it digs into my bone thin body. Master aligns his cock right at my back entrance, his favorite position and for once I don't fight it. For once I want to give master everything he needs. He shoves himself in harshly, causing me to bite down on my lips. I can taste the metallic flavor of blood but ignore it all.
Master needs this for me.
And I will always obey my master.
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