Every tread on the stairs worked dread a little deeper into my bones. I hadn't imagined it. I didn't have the breadth of experience to dream up the delicious things Seth did to me when my naked skin slid next to his. But what about the vermin? If there was no Grim War, then I had never encountered Seth, nor had I ever worked by his side. As much as it would be a relief to never see another Turned, I didn't want to contemplate a world where their absence resulted in Seth belonging to Louise.
I swallowed a sob. I was stronger than that. All I needed was to clear the cobwebs out of my head and figure out what had happened. A good gallop across the fields would help. Once I had seen to them and Father.