Chapter 82
Eyes of the World (I)
Cain popped open a can of beer, drinking it in silence while he leaned against a smooth surface of a sword sticking out of the ground. The atmosphere around him was quaint and quiet, even somber to a degree, an occasional bout of wind ruffling his dusty hair.
It was over, for now, which was why he emptied his mind of everything, just hollowly staring into the horizon as the night slowly began to descend upon the world.
An hour or so later, he was pulled out of his thoughtless stupor by a few loud groans, prompting him to glance sideways and note that Senna was waking up. She rolled back and forth a few times, her eyelashes fluttering as she struggled to open her eyes.
Cain smiled lightly and stood up, stretching, as he walked over, immediately devising a 'prank' in his head. He waited a few moments for her to come to herself, sitting up and looking around hazily.
"... w-what happened?" she asked in a strained voice.
"You... you guys... won..." Cain said in a somewhat awkward tone, pulling her attention on him.
"We... won?"
"Hm." he nodded.
"Yeah! We won! Wait--what's with your expression?! What's wrong?!" she asked hastily.
"Uh... I... I don't know how to say this..." he mumbled, glancing to and from her repeatedly. "I tried... I tried to fix it, Senna. I really did. But... there... there was nothing I could do..."
"Fix what?" she asked, her eyes widening in fear. "F-fix what, Cain?! Tell me... what's... what's wrong?!"
"Uh--just... just remember that, uh, you're still... you're still beautiful, okay? You're still special."
"... n-no... what... what happened..." she mumbled in horror, her lips trembling. Looking around madly for a moment, she seemed to recall her Class, pulling out a sword and tepidly bringing it in front of her face, yet not daring to look at it. Taking a deep breath, she gritted her teeth and steeled her nerves, facing her reflection in the sword.
She appeared confused for a moment, as though uncertain of what she was seeing. Then, her cheeks flushed red and she began biting her lower lip. Her teary eyes looked away from the reflection and at the grinning Cain who barely held back his laughter. Something bitter was stuck in her throat, her fingers kneading into fists.
"You... you... you asshole!!" she exclaimed as tears coalesced on her cheeks. "I... I really thought something horrible happened! You asshole! Asshole!" she was yelling by the end, throwing nearby rocks at him as he nimbly dodged the few that actually managed to reach him.
"..." All things said and done... she is just sixteen... feeling bad for it, he pulled a can of beer from the inventory to bribe her but decided against it, walking up and sitting next to her. "I'm sorry."
"Humph..."
"It must have been hard," he added, looking to the front. "Fighting that thing."
"... it was..." she mumbled.
"Good job," she felt his hand land on top of her head, patting her gently. She was startled for a moment yet, strangely enough, didn't feel any discomfort. If anything, it was the opposite; her worries seemed to melt at that moment under the warmth of that hand. "I'll buy you something when we're out. What do teen girls even want these days? Back in my heyday--wait, no, I never had a clue what any girls wanted, let alone the most complex bunch of 'em all, teen girls..."
"You're not doing yourself any favors admitting that you know?" she chuckled lightly, rolling her eyes at him.
"Eh," he shrugged. "The first step a man has to take to start becoming great is to admit he knows little. Or, in my case, nothing."
"... you said you had a kid," Senna spoke out after a brief silence between the two. "Right?"
"Yup, Lana," Cain replied excitedly, pulling a picture suddenly from his inventory of him and Lana dressed up for Halloween when she was four. He was dressed up as a 'patient' in scrubs, while she donned a white, doctor's coat and a plastic stethoscope around her neck. "Isn't she adorable?" he bragged. "Man, I honestly can't wait to get out of here so I can see her again. I'm kinda scared to introduce her to you since I've a feeling you'll turn her into a rebel and all and she's gonna be one of those kids that keeps saying 'Hey! Let me make my own mistakes, goddammit!' by the time she's sixteen or something. No offense, I mean."
"Ugh..." Senna grumbled, glaring at him for a moment before focusing back on the picture. "You guys sound like a happy family..."
"... we're trying," he said. "I've done nearly everything to try and destroy that, I'm lucky this kid doesn't want me dead."
"Hah, yeah right," she scoffed. "What's the worst thing you did? Forget to buy her a birthday present for one year?"
"... show up at her seventh birthday completely plastered," Cain said in a regretful tone. "In front of all our family, friends, neighbors, and kids she hung out with. Then destroyed her birthday cake when I tried to cut it, stumbled over into the pile of presents, puked on them in the process, and nearly got into a fight with one of the parents."
"..."
"For most of her life... I wasn't a good person, let alone a good dad," he added, sighing as he subconsciously pulled out a cigarette and lit it up. "Those two must have given me at least a thousand second chances. That's why... no matter what... I can't fail them again."
"..." Senna stared for a moment at those determined eyes, looking away right after as she bit her lip.
"I'll say it again," his voice pulled her back. "Join us. For all I care, you don't need to ever come into the Tower with us again. You can just stay on the outside and live as normal of a life as you want."
"Pft, yeah, right," she scoffed, rolling her eyes at him. "You'll say anything to pull me in, huh?"
"I'm serious," he said, staring directly into her eyes and forcing her to look back into his. "The Tower... these expeditions... they are just one part of living. Like a job. Only idiots will devote themselves wholly to them and eventually end up losing sight of who they were."
"... they why are you in here?" she asked.
"... circumstances," he replied with a mysterious grin. "But those only apply to me. Are you talented? Yes. Superbly. By far the most talented of all of us here. But at the end of the day, in your heart of hearts... why are you in here? Is it because you've realized your talent and wanted to unload it to the fullest? Or is it because you hoped to find something in here that was worth fighting for?"
"You know, I can say one sentence," she said. "And it will immediately result in you never giving me another offer to join you."
"Try me." he said without hesitation.
"..." she looked at him for a moment, scrutinizing the calm and confident expression on his face that ended up frustrating her somewhat. "The first thing I did in the Tower..." she mumbled. "Is kill my own father and my fiance."
"..." his expression did change, as she suspected -- but not in the direction she imagined. She saw neither fear nor disgust in his eyes, nor did she see pity. Just... pain, she realized. "Man..." he sighed, kicking away the butt of the cigarette as he suddenly stretched out his arm and pulled her in, gently laying her head onto his chest. "The world's a fucked up place regardless, ain't it?"
"..." she didn't resist, letting herself be woven into the threads she resisted and rejected all this while. Even assailed by the stench of a man who hadn't showered in a while, she found comfort in the gentle embrace.
He didn't say anything else, and neither did she. Rather, him saying nothing spoke more than any string of words could. He merely held her as she cried silently. All the boulders that resided on top of her heart began to thaw, one by one, and all the feelings she festered for years upon years, that gnawed at her like silent demons, began to slowly coalesce into her tears that dripped free over his tattered coat.
What she feared, all that she had built up cracking, was transpiring -- yet she did nothing to stop it. It felt strange, being accepted. Unknown. Eerie. Even slightly scary. All her life she spent fighting for that acceptance, gnawing and clawing at the endless walls, at the traditions she was raised within, at the core beliefs she truly thought could be broken beneath the hooves of parental love. All... for naught.
Yet, now, even with the heavier shoulders and increased baggage, an almost complete stranger lifted them up for her, everything else be damned.
"You won..." she mumbled softly. "In the end..."
"... it's hardly a victory," he spoke back. "I'd have won if you got to live a normal life and never even get into this place like this."
"Your kid... is really lucky..."
"Huh? What do you mean 'your kid'?" a tonal shift warned Senna that something was off, but she couldn't quite pinpoint as to what. "Don't you mean your step-sister?"
"Yea---wait, what?!" she pulled back abruptly and stared at his scarily-serious face.
"You'll have to wait a bit for me to sweeten Emma into marrying me again to make it official," he continued as though he said nothing out of the ordinary. "But for all intents and purposes, you're our kid now. And, naturally, by extension, Lana's your step-sister. She's gonna be quite happy, you know? She always wanted a sister. Granted, she wanted a younger one, but, oh well."
"Y-y-you're insane!!" she exclaimed, flustered. "W-what do you mean 'your kid'?! I never agreed to that! Fuck, do you realize how creepy you sound right now?!"
"I imagine somewhere along the lines of 'pretty creepy'," he chuckled, standing up and stretching lazily. "I'm just messing with you," he added. "Unless--"
"No unless!!"
"Tsk..."
"T-to think I really wanted to join you again! Grr," she shuddered.
"E-eh? You... you won't join us?"
"--d-don't look at me with those eyes! I won't cave in!"
"What's all the yelling for?!" Emma angrily shouted as she was rudely woken up from a fairly nice dream.
"Oh, Em' -- good news, I've adopted us Senna!" Cain exclaimed.
"E-eh? Really?" Senna glanced back and noticed Emma's eyes light up like lanterns. "That's great! Lana always wanted a sister! Granted, she wanted a younger one, but, oh well." T-these guys are insane!! Both of them are bonkers! What the hell did I get myself tangled into?!