The Blackbird swooped low over the water, a sleek shadow slipping through the fog. Somewhere below, on a police boat, two guards squinted into the mist. One nudged the other and muttered, "Sounds like a storm's comin'." The other just shrugged, too tired or too lazy to care.
The fog thickened, cloaking the jet in secrecy as it glided towards Liberty Island. The Statue loomed ahead, its iconic form half-obscured in the haze. But Rogue wasn't paying attention to the majestic view or the soft roll of fog creeping over the water. She was focused on the towering Statue of Liberty, or more specifically, to the mechanical monstrosity now sitting atop the torch. Her son probably strapped in there right now.
The Blackbird hit the ground with a thud, jostling everyone inside.
"You call that a landing?" Logan grumbled, glaring daggers at Scott.
"Sorry," Scott quipped, without even looking back, a cheeky grin tugging at his lips.
Logan just grunted, giving him a look that promised he'd get back at him for that later. Jean caught the exchange and shook her head with a small smile. "Boys," she muttered under her breath.
They filed out of the jet, stepping onto the island with a sense of urgency. All eyes were drawn upward to the torch, where Magneto's machine loomed — some twisted contraption perched at the top like a giant parasite.
The wind picked up as they made their way to the museum entrance, Storm's cape fluttering behind her dramatically. Cyclops, in the lead as usual, strode up to the metal detector waited by the doorway.
Scott went through first, as expected. No beep, of course. His visor wasn't exactly standard issue metal.
Next came Jean, followed by Storm. Nothing but silence from the machine.
Then Logan stepped through. The metal detector immediately blared like it was screaming for help.
"Figures," Logan muttered, already annoyed. He popped one claw, slicing through the metal detector's panel with a quick jab. Sparks flew, and the machine let out one last wheezing gasp before it died, the light flickering out. Logan took a step back, admiring his handiwork as the others stopped and stared.
"Really?" Cyclops said, not even trying to hide his annoyance.
Logan just smirked. He retracted the middle claw, leaving the two outer ones extended, essentially flipping Cyclops off with his claws. Scott's expression stayed serious for about two seconds before the corners of his mouth twitched up in a grin. Jean rolled her eyes again.
Rogue followed last, stepping carefully over the remains of the metal detector. "He just can't help himself," she sighed, shaking her head in exasperation.
"Nope," Logan grunted, but there was a flicker of humor in his eyes.
As they moved further into the museum's hallway, a six-foot replica of the Statue of Liberty stood by the security desk, like some weird guardian watching over them. The silence grew thick with tension, broken only by the sound of their footsteps echoing against the steel beams above.
Logan's senses suddenly prickled. He stopped dead in his tracks, hand raised to halt the others.
"There's someone here," he growled, eyes narrowing as he scanned the shadows.
Cyclops immediately went on alert, visor aimed and ready. "Where?"
Logan squinted into the shadows, his senses on high alert. "I don't know," he muttered, voice low. "Keep your eyes open." His gaze flickered to Cyclops, and a hint of amusement tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Hang on."
Without waiting for a response, Logan moved off into the dimly lit hall, disappearing into the shadows with barely a sound.
"Logan, no! We need to—Damn it!" Cyclops muttered, frustration lacing his voice. He turned back to Jean, but before he could say anything, Logan reappeared, padding back toward them like nothing happened.
"Anything?" Scott asked, raising an eyebrow.
Logan shook his head, about to say something, when Rogue suddenly stepped forward and wham—socked him square in the face with a punch that echoed through the hall.
"You are NOT Logan," Rogue said, eyes narrowed in suspicion.
The fake Logan grinned, his features rippling ever so slightly. But before he could react, the real Logan came barreling out of nowhere, tackling the imposter to the ground. They rolled through a side doorway, both Logans tangling in a blur of claws, fists, and snarls.
The two Logans scrambled to their feet simultaneously, facing off. Cyclops stepped forward, aiming his visor at both of them. "Logan!" he shouted. Both turned to him, speaking in unison: "Wait!"
Before Cyclops could decide which one to blast, a loud WHAM echoed through the hall. A large metal door slammed shut, locking the two Logans behind it and separating them from the others.
The remaining X-Men rushed up to the door. Cyclops yanked at it, but it didn't budge. His jaw clenched as he stepped back, visor glowing ominously. "Stand back," he muttered, preparing to blast the door open.
THUD.
Before he could fire, Toad dropped from the ceiling like a giant green missile. He ricocheted off the wall and delivered a powerful double kick to Cyclops' chest, sending him flying backward through the opposite doorway.
"Scott!" Jean cried, starting to move toward him, but Toad leapt again, this time slamming into Storm.
The two tumbled across the floor, Toad grinning like a madman as he ended up on his back, both feet braced against Storm's stomach. He kicked out with brutal force, launching her up over the railing onto the upper floor of the museum.
Toad wasted no time, springing up to the rafters, disappearing in a blink.
Cyclops groaned, getting to his feet. He spotted Jean across the room and ran to her, but as he neared, another clang—the metal door slammed shut, separating him from her. He banged on it in frustration, but there was no getting through.
Jean felt a prickling on the back of her neck. She turned just in time to see Toad grinning at her from the rafters, his slimy tongue flicking out. Before she could react, his tongue shot forward, coating her face with a thick layer of hardening slime.
Jean staggered, clawing at the slime as it hardened around her. "Jean!" Rogue called out, rushing to her side. But before she could help, Toad was back, leaping down toward her with the same wild grin.
Rogue barely dodged his first strike, but Toad moved with freakish agility. He bounced off a wall, spinning mid-air and landing a kick that sent Rogue stumbling back.
"Come on," Toad sneered, hopping on his feet like a deranged boxer. "Is that what you got?"
Rogue's eyes narrowed. She wasn't going down that easily. Snikt, she popped out her own claws.
She darted forward, swinging hard, but Toad dodged with a quick leap to the side. He lashed out with his tongue, wrapping it around Rogue's arm. With a grunt, she yanked back, pulling Toad toward her with surprising strength. She twisted mid-pull, slamming him into the nearest pillar. The impact sent cracks spiderwebbing across the stone, but Toad just laughed it off, his tongue snapping free from Rogue's arm.
Toad retaliated with a rapid flurry of kicks, his amphibian reflexes keeping Rogue on the defensive. She blocked one kick, ducked under another, but he was too fast. One of his kicks landed square in her stomach, sending her flying back into a display case.
Rogue grimaced, the wind knocked out of her. But she wasn't giving up. Not when her family was in danger.
Toad grinned, bouncing from side to side. "Gave up yet?"
"Not even close," Rogue muttered, pushing herself up.
She charged at him again, this time aiming for his legs. Toad tried to jump out of the way, but she was ready. Rogue grabbed his ankle mid-leap and slammed him down onto the marble floor with all the strength she had. The impact left a small crater beneath Toad, and he groaned, his cocky grin faltering.
"Now we're talkin'," Rogue said with a smirk, raising her claws to slash him again.
But before she could land it, Toad's tongue snapped out again, wrapping around her wrist and yanking her off balance. He flipped to his feet, pulling her toward him.
Rogue twisted out of his grip at the last second, using his momentum to spin and slam him into the wall once more. Toad groaned, slumping down.
"Ya picked the wrong fight, Froggie," Rogue said, ready to finish it. Her claws shining in the light.
Toad struggled to his feet, his grin gone, now replaced by a snarl. "Well, ain't you the shiny new X-Man," he croaked, his voice slithery as his tongue.
Rogue narrowed her eyes and took a step back, fists raised. "I've had about enough of your ugly mug," she said, barely keeping her Southern twang in check as her anger flared.
Just as Toad was about to strike again, a powerful gust of wind blasted through the hall. Rogue's hair whipped around her face as she looked up, eyes widening in relief.
"Storm!" Rogue yelled.
Above them, Storm floated down gracefully, her eyes glowing white with fury. "You have overstayed your welcome," she said, her voice carrying an edge of thunder.
Toad's smug expression faltered. "Oh, you again."
With a flick of her wrist, Storm summoned a powerful gust of wind, sending Toad flying through the air. He crashed against the far wall with a sickening thud, sliding down and landing in a heap on the ground.
She blows him straight through the windows, her eyes glowing with fury, and he holds to the statue with his tongue.
She walks up to him, saying "Do you know what happens to a toad when it's strike by a lightning? Same thing that happens to anything else."
She then sends a lightning bolt directly at him. Toad is electrocuted, losing his tongue grip, and flies away into the sea.
Storm floated down to Rogue, her expression softening. "You alright?"
Rogue smirked, crossing her arms. "Now that's what I call teamwork."
Storm landed gracefully beside Rogue, giving her a nod. "Let's go find the others."
-
Cyclops staggered back to his feet after Toad's earlier ambush, shaking off the lingering dizziness. His visor glowed a faint red, and through his peripheral vision, he spotted the metal door that had locked him out. He clenched his fists, frustration boiling up. Without hesitation, he raised his head slightly and blasted the door open with a concentrated burst of energy, sending it flying off its hinges.
As soon as the door was down, Cyclops sprinted forward, bursting into the room. His heart pounded as he looked around for Jean.
And there she was—Jean, barely holding on, her hands frantically trying to peel away the thick, disgusting layer of slime covering her face. She was gasping for air, her movements slowing.
"Jean!" Cyclops called out, his voice sharp with urgency. He dashed to her side, his boots skidding slightly on the floor. "Don't move!" His eyes narrowed as he quickly adjusted his visor, setting it to a lower power. He couldn't risk blasting too hard and hurting her.
He aimed carefully, steadying his breathing, and fired a precise beam. The heat from the blast melted away the hardened slime, cutting through it without hitting her skin. The slimy substance hissed and sizzled, breaking apart piece by piece as Cyclops continued his precise shots.
After what felt like an eternity, Jean coughed and sucked in a deep breath as the last remnants of the slime fell away from her face.
Cyclops rushed closer, his hand reaching out to steady her as she stumbled slightly. "You okay?" he asked, his voice softened now, concern etched across his face.
Jean nodded, still catching her breath. "Yeah... I'll be fine. Thanks, Scott." She wiped at her face, grimacing at the remaining traces of slime on her gloves.
"Let's get you out of here," Cyclops said, gently guiding her forward, keeping his visor ready in case Toad or Mystique made another move. The two of them glanced up, hearing distant fighting coming from higher levels—the others were still in trouble.
-
Logan stared down at Mystique, his claws poised to strike. But just as he was about to make the final move, Mystique's sly grin returned. With a swift motion, she twisted beneath him, flipping Logan off her and darting toward the shadows like a snake retreating into its hole.
"Damn it," Logan cursed, pushing himself back up to his feet. He scanned the dark corners, but Mystique was nowhere to be found. For now.
Logan paced through the narrow hallways of the Statue, claws still out, ready. The echoes of battles fought elsewhere bounced off the cold walls. Toad was probably still somewhere annoying the hell out of his team, and Wade… well, Wade was out there, probably in the machine and annoying Magneto, Logan hoped.
The air was cold, too quiet for comfort. Logan's senses were on high alert, but all he could hear was his own heartbeat. He stalked through the halls, his boots clanking softly on the metal floor.
And then a voice from behind startled him. "Logan? Come on, we need to regroup and save Wade!"
Logan spun around. There was Rogue, standing in the middle of the hallway, her face urgent, but… something was off. Her stance, the slight twitch of her smile—it didn't feel right. His instincts kicked in.
"You think you can fool me again?" Logan growled.
Rogue's face twisted in confusion. "Logan? What's wrong?"
Without a moment's hesitation, Logan slashed forward. His claws cut through the air and met soft flesh, a wet sound echoing through the hallway as he buried them deep into her gut.
Mystique gasped, her disguise faltering as her body shifted back to her true blue form. Blood trickled from her mouth as she stared at him in disbelief.
"How…?" she whispered, her voice weak, trembling as her hands grasped at the wound.
Logan twisted his claws ever so slightly, glaring down at her. "You're not her."
Mystique's eyes fluttered, her body shaking before going limp in his grip. Logan pulled his claws out, letting her lifeless form slump to the ground as she morphed fully back into her true self.
He wiped his claws clean, no remorse in his eyes as he left Mystique behind. One down, but the job wasn't finished.
Logan rounded a corner and spotted Cyclops and Jean up ahead, standing near a metal door. Cyclops turned toward him, his visor still glowing faintly red.
Logan stopped, arching a brow. "Hey, hey! It's me."
Cyclops raised his hand, signaling Logan to stop. "Prove it."
Logan's face didn't even twitch. "You're a dick."
Cyclops's lips twitched upward ever so slightly, lowering his hand. "OK."
Jean rolled her eyes but looked relieved. "Where's Mystique?"
"Gone," Logan said, his tone flat as he sheathed his claws.
Before they could say anything more, there was a sudden movement from above. Storm and Rogue appeared at the top of the stairway, rushing up toward the head which made Logan and the others quickly follows.
"That's Wade!" Rogue shouted, pointing into the machine nestled in the torch. Wade was strapped in, looking uncomfortable until he saw the X-Men coming. "MOOOOM! DAAAAD! IS THAT YOUU!!! YOU REALLY WEAR THEM!!! KYAAAA!!!"
"Wade, honey, hang tight! Mom and Dad are coming to you!" Rogue called out, her voice mixing urgency with a protective fierceness as she took off from the head of Liberty toward the torch but suddenly stopped mid-run.
"Everybody get out of here!" Logan's warning echoed, but it was too late.
"What is it?" Storm asked.
"We can't move," Rogue said, eyes wide as Magneto descended to greet them. With a flick of his wrist, he sent both Logan and Rogue crashing back against the wall.
The metal bracings in the statue groaned and came loose. Cyclops blasted at the braces in rapid succession, but there were too many. One viciously wrapped around his neck from behind, forcing his head back and pinning him against the wall. The braces punched through the statue's metal, binding them all in place.
Storm and Jean struggled against their own restraints. Cyclops and Jean found themselves caught in a way that forced them to face each other, expressions a mixture of panic and determination.
Magneto floated down into the head of the statue, a smug grin plastered across his face. "Ah, my brothers, welcome." Sabretooth thumped down behind Magneto, Logan's dog tag dangling from his neck like a trophy.
"You'd better close your eyes," Magneto said to Cyclops as Sabretooth lunged forward, snatching Cyclops' visor and tearing it off his face.
Cyclops squeezed his eyes shut, knowing that one wrong move could unleash a wave of destruction that would obliterate everything in his path—including Jean. Panic flickered in Jean's eyes as she watched him, helpless.
"And you too," Magneto continued, eyes narrowing, "let's just point those claws of yours in a safer direction."
Both Logan and Rogue's fists balled, pressing against their chests, forming an X. If they dared to extend their claws, they'd rupture something vital.
-
"Isn't that a lil bit anticlimactic? He just re-used the movie scene and tweaked it a bit!" Wade groaned aloud, glancing around the directions above this paragraf.
They probably already guessed it.
(Well, at least the Rogue vs. Toad fight was mildly entertaining, until Storm came in and electrocuted the poor frog.)
Wade sighed. "Alright, I guess it's time for us to finally get out of this machine, right?"
We should've escaped, like, five paragraphs ago, but whatever. Let's move!
"Yeah, I got sidetracked reading the plot!" Wade quipped, using his shadow powers to phase his hands free from the straps. "Okay! Let's tinker this ugly duckling a bit, shall we?" Wade rubbed his two hands like an evil villain as he began messing with the machine with his technopathy power.
"Let's tweak this, ohh shiny... and what does that thing do?!"
(Ooh, do it! And do that! Oh! Jubilee would be so proud to us right now.)
The readers are probably are super confused right now.
"Pssh, like they want some boring, super-detailed techy explanation. They'll figure it out later. Trust me." Wade smirked. "Okay, let's fucking go!" He said as he finished tinkering with the machine. Yeah, its gonna be awesome at the end of this chapter!
With a quick teleportation, Wade poofed himself over to where Sabretooth had stashed his backpack.
"Ohhh, I knew Uncle Vic still loved me! He kept my bag!" Wade grinned, pulling out his wooden katana that he prepared to look like actual katana. He also took his two plastic bb gun that he also paints to look metallic, like a real gun, in case if y'all forget to read chapter 19!
(We should bonk him first before confusing him with our gun!)
Again, I don't really think that gonna work.
"Well, time to save everyone! MAXIMUM EFFORT!"
Poof! He sneakily teleported back into the shadows behind Magneto, who was deep into his villainous monologue, holding the X-Men at bay like a total cliché. Wade couldn't resist.
Wade crept up, his skeleton already uncoated from adamantium, keeping him under Magneto's radar. With a dramatic, totally necessary flair, he swung the wooden katana straight at the back of Magneto's shiny helmet.
BOINK!
"Ah ah ah! No monologuing! It's in my contract! Didn't you read it? It's written in 24 languages, for fuck's sake!" Wade exclaimed as Magneto hit the floor, groaning, clutching his head like someone who just got whacked with a toy sword at Comic-Con.
(Whoa, I didn't know that would actually work so well.)
It's called plot armor, duh.
(Right, we should really read the draft ahead of time more often. It's really usefull!)
"WADE!" both Rogue and Logan yelled in unison, finally free from Magneto's magnetic grip. But before they could rush to their son, Sabretooth tackled Logan like a linebacker in a grudge match.
Sabretooth hit Logan with the force of a freight train, knocking him down and slamming him into the cold, metal floor. The clash of claws and brute strength echoed through the Statue of Liberty like a war drum.
"Yer gettin' slower, Vic," Logan snarled, pushing Sabretooth off him with a sharp kick to the gut. Sabretooth staggered, but his eyes gleamed with bloodlust.
Rogue was there before Sabretooth could recover, her fist glowing as she slammed it into his jaw with all the force she could muster. "That's for takin' my boy!" she shouted as her knuckles connected with Sabretooth's face. The blow sent him reeling back, his head snapping to the side, spitting blood and saliva.
Meanwhile, Wade stood near Magneto, twirling his wooden katana like a Jedi—because why not? It felt right, especially with Magneto, somehow back on his feet, staggering like he had no idea what just hit him. Spoiler for Magneto: it was Wade.
Magneto muttered, blinking through the pain, "How the hell... did you escape the machine?"
Wade tilted his head, grinning as he rested the katana against his shoulder. "Oh, you're standing again? Not for long!"
With a smooth flick of his wrist, Wade sent the katana flying in a perfect arc, straight into Magneto's helmet. BOINK! Like a professional baseball player knocking one out of the park, Wade struck Magneto square on the head again. Magneto staggered, stumbling backward as he clutched his helmet, his face twisted in pain and confusion.
(HAHAHA! HIT HIM AGAIN! I LIKE HITTING AND OLD MAN!)
Bracket, I think you need to see a therapist. Heck, We all need it.
"How the hell do you keep doing that?" Magneto growled, trying to shake off the hit, his pride clearly hurt as much as his head.
The old man's eyes darted to Wade's katana, and with a quick flick of his wrist, Magneto attempted to yank it from Wade's grip using his magnetic powers—except nothing happened. The katana stayed put, totally unaffected by his abilities. Wade, still grinning, just twirled it lazily in his hand like it was no big deal.
"Wait… why can't I?" Magneto's voice trembled with a mix of disbelief and frustration. His eyes narrowed in confusion.
Wade just grinned wider. He could feel Magneto's rage building, and honestly, that only made it better. He gave the old man a smug look, as if he were about to give him the answer. But of course, he wasn't. He's not really one for villain monologue anyway.
He stepped back, casually tapping the katana against his shoulder and picking his nose before hitting Magneto again like a piñata at a birthday party.
"Tell me... how?!" Magneto demanded, his voice cracking under the weight of his anger—and possibly a concussion.
We probably hit him enough to gave him concussion.
(Again! Again! Again!)
Wade raised an eyebrow, clearly enjoying himself. "I'm not telling you, Grandpa. I'm not that fucking stupid." He swung his wooden katana again, this time knocking Magneto's helmet clean off, sending it flying across the platform.
With a flourish, Wade pulled a gun from his holster, aiming it directly at Magneto. His smirk widened as he teased, "Now, if you kindly surrender, it'd be much appreciated! Or—" Wade's grin stretched wider, eyes glinting mischievously, "—I'll make you into Xavier 2.0."
Magneto's eyes darted to the gun, and for a brief moment, the old man's confidence returned. He extended his hand, fully expecting to wrench the gun away from Wade with his magnetic powers. But... nothing. Not a twitch. Not a spark. His smug expression faded into sheer disbelief.
His eyes widened as the horrifying realization hit him. "What did you do to me!?" he hissed, rage and fear dripping from his words.
"Oh, me? I just kinda took your powers away," Wade replied, not even trying to hide the sarcasm. "You know, because I'm Marvel Jesus and all." He winked, still spinning the katana in one hand like it was all just a game before putting in back in his back.
You know he will realise that we lied to him eventually, right?
'That's future Wade problem, not me!'
(Oww, are we not gonna hitting him again?)
Before Magneto could even muster a response, Wade casually pulled the trigger. BANG! The bullet flew through the air and lodged itself deep in Magneto's ankle. The old man crumbled, letting out a sharp cry of pain, clutching his foot as blood started to pool around the wound.
"ARGHH!!!" Magneto gasped, his face twisted in a mixture of agony and utter confusion.
"I told you," Wade said nonchalantly, never missing a beat. He pointed the gun toward Magneto's head, his tone still as casual as if they were discussing the weather. "I'm not telling you."
With a casual shrug, Wade reached into his backpack and pulled out a long rope. He wasted no time wrapping Magneto up like a mummy, layer upon layer, making sure the master of magnetism wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.
"Sorry, Gramps, no escape clauses on my contract, clause 35." Wade muttered, securing the final knot with a tug. Magneto was still groaning in pain, too weak to resist, though that didn't stop Wade from giving him one last boink to knock him unconscious. "Nighty-night, Gandalf."
Wade, now feeling pretty good about his odds, grabbed Magneto's helmet and twirled it on his finger like a basketball, giving it a good spin. "Alright, family time," he muttered, eyes locked on the brawl ahead. Logan and Sabretooth were going at it like they always did—feral and loud—while Rogue darted in for hits, looking for any opening to help her husband.
"Hey, Uncle Vic!" Wade called out, grinning as Sabretooth snarled. "Heads up!"
(KOBE!!!)
Right in the head!
He then launched the helmet straight at Sabretooth's head. It hit with a loud thud, and the big guy staggered for a second, momentarily stunned.
Rogue seized the opportunity, landing a solid punch to Sabretooth's gut. Logan followed up with a crushing blow to his side, and together, they forced him to the ground, locking him in place with their combined strength.
"Nice teamwork, fam!" Wade cheered, sprinting over to where Scott, Jean, and Storm were still trapped in Magneto's metal restraints. "Hold tight, guys, I got this."
Wade placed his hand on the metal locks and, with a surge of strength, disengaged the restraints, freeing the X-Men from their metallic prison. He even tossed Scott his visor back, grinning.
Scott rubbed his wrists, grateful but all business. "Thanks, Wade. Let's get Sabretooth locked down before he—"
Before Scott could finish, Sabretooth let out a roar and, with a surge of power, broke free from Rogue and Logan's grasp. The two were knocked back, struggling to regain their footing as Sabretooth growled, his eyes burning with fury.
"Aw, crap," Wade muttered.
But Scott didn't miss a beat. In one fluid motion, he raised his visor and unleashed a powerful optic blast, sending Sabretooth flying across the statue and crashing into the ocean below with a tremendous splash. The sound echoed through the air as the Brotherhood's enforcer disappeared beneath the waves.
Wade, watching the spectacle with wide eyes, couldn't help but let out a low whistle. "Well, that's one way to wash your hands of family drama."
"Wade!" Rogue shouted, her voice filled with relief as she rushed toward him.
"MOM!" Wade shouted back with equal enthusiasm, throwing his arms wide open like he was in the final scene of a rom-com.
They collided in a tight embrace, Rogue squeezing him as if he might disappear again if she let go. Wade, of course, couldn't resist being his usual self, despite the emotional moment.
"Aw, shucks, Ma, if I knew a near-death experience would get me this much love, I would've done it much sooner."
Rogue pulled back slightly, swatting his arm. "Don't joke about that, Wade!"
Logan smirked from the sidelines. "Kid never stops, does he?"
Wade grinned, still holding onto Rogue. "Nope! What can I say? I live for the drama, just like you and Uncle Vic. Guess it runs in the family."
Rogue rolled her eyes but smiled, clearly just happy to have him safe. "We're glad you're okay, sugah."
Suddenly, the machine began to glow ominously, drawing everyone's attention. Wade, somehow and suddenly, disappeared with a poof before reappearing, casually munching on popcorn and wearing sunglasses—complete with a tag still dangling from the arm. No one knew where he'd gotten it.
It was from the gift shop down below.
(Well, we're not leaving the Liberty Island without some souvenirs, are we?)
"How?! The machine shouldn't work with Wade here!" Scott exclaimed, his visor glowing in alarm.
"Oh, relax, I tinkered with it a little bit. Oi, old man! Wake up and look at your machine!" Wade shouted at Magneto, who was still groggy but now getting a front-row seat to the chaos.
As if on cue, the machine erupted in a spectacular explosion that would make Jubilee proud. "That's for kidnapping me and thinking about kidnapping my mom!" Wade declared triumphantly, watching the fireworks with a wide grin.
(So beautifull!!!)
Jubilee would be so proud!
"Ho... How???" Magneto gasped, eyes wide in disbelief.
"Again! Not telling you! Now, night-night!" Wade said with a flourish, knocking Magneto unconscious again with a swift whack from his wooden katana.
(I always love it when you did that!)
Maybe we got a weird kink? Because I started to like it to, you are a bad influence Bracket.
"Why did you run away?" Rogue asked, her voice filled with concern.
"You never ran away, did you?" Logan added, a knowing look in his eyes. "Sneaking around in the Danger Room, the wooden but painted sword, the plastic BB gun… you planned this, didn't you? You planning on fighting Magneto alone? You somehow know about his plan and you probably planned this from day one didn't you?"
"Owwh, I never get past you, do I, pops?" Wade shot back, grinning.
"You planned this? You could've just told us!" Scott interjected, a mix of disbelief and admiration in his tone.
"And would you have ever listened to me? Yeah, my parents definitely would, but all of you'd just dismiss me as a 12-year-old who couldn't possibly know about Magneto's plans, not to mention you gonna be really suspicious to me the whole time," Wade replied, raising an eyebrow.
Scott fell silent, realizing the truth in Wade's words.
"Anyway, I'm starving! Their hideout and cruise ship was not exactly a five-star hotel. You guys in the mood for shawarma?" Wade continued, leading the way toward the exit.
As they boarded the plane, police sirens blared in the distance, and officers began to swarm the premises, quickly apprehending Magneto.
"Wade, I'm really sorry about yesterday, at the mansion," Scott said, his tone sincere.
"Heh, I already forgave you. It was all part of my plan anyway, so, about that shawarma…" Wade replied nonchalantly.
"I'll never explode on you like that again, but I'm still going to give you a stern talking-to and a punishment," Scott added, raising an eyebrow.
"Meh, I'm okay with that, as long as the punishment isn't scrubbing the toilet. Too unoriginal if you asked me."
"Oh, it is. Scrubbing the toilet," Scott shot back, smirking.
"NOOOOOO!!!!!"
You shouldn't told him about the toilet, Idiot!
(Ah well, the mansion toilet wouldn't be that bad, is it?)
The arc is now over, btw do you like long chapter like this or should I go back to 2k-3k words per chapter? This chapter could be 2 or 3 chapter but I didn't want to split them up but I guess some people would find it boring?
Two weeks after his worst field trip ever: staring some old metalhead, Wade's words, things were just beginning to settle at the mansion. Or at least as settled as things get when your family consists of mutants, like almost half the X-Men are mad at you, and you're currently serving time for, you know… stealing the professor's wheelchair for a joyride around the mansion and installing rocket launcher with real rocket fuel to the said wheelchair.
(Scrubbing the toilet actually not really that bad, we could prank the toilet after that)
And risk people knowing it was us instantly? Yeah, no, maybe after someone else got that punishment.
This morning, the kitchen was filled with the sweet aroma of syrup, butter, and what he could only be described as "Pancake Paradise." Wade, determined to somehow redeem himself after the whole "I can handle Magneto alone, b'cause I am Marvel Jesus!" fiasco, was at the stove. The boy had gone overboard. Seriously overboard.
(It was like pancake Armageddon!)
How do you purpose we eat all of this pancakes?
"Okay, maybe I overdid it," he muttered, flipping another pancake with a flourish. "But let's be real here—can you ever have too many pancakes? That's like saying there's such a thing as too many explosions in a Michael Bay movie. Impossible. Blasphemous. Besides, this is totally not a cry for attention after that whole getting-kidnapped-by-an-evil-grandpa thing. Nope. Definitely not."
(Uhuh, definitely not!)
Yeah, DEFINITELY NOT.
The kitchen smelled like heaven—if heaven was made of butter, sugar, and slightly burned edges. He could hear the chaos starting as mutants filed in, drawn like moths to a carb-loaded flame. And right at the front of the chaos crew? Ken, already strapped into his booster seat at the table, legs swinging as if he were testing out new moves for a jungle gym audition.
"Ken, buddy, we talked about this," Wade called over his shoulder as he flipped a pancake. "No climbing walls until after breakfast."
Ken grinned, his small face full of mischief as he banged his plastic fork on the table. "I am hungry! Can I eat the pancakes now?"
Wade barely looked up from his work. "Hold your horses, buddy. Great art takes time. You can't rush the Rembrandt of breakfast foods."
Ken furrowed his brows. "What's a Rembrandt?"
"Pancakes are," Wade deadpanned, flipping another perfectly golden disk onto the towering stack. "I'm pretty sure he painted breakfast... or something."
(I don't think he is? Is he?)
I don't think so, no.
Beside Ken, sat Laura, tiny, fierce, and still very much a mystery. She still hadn't said her first word yet even at three-years-old, but the way she eyed the stack of pancakes. Well, she didn't need to, her eyes already said it all. Wade swore he could see a subtle nod of approval when he sprinkled chocolate chips into one of the batches. That or she was plotting to throw a pancake frisbee at him when he wasn't looking. Honestly, either scenario felt equally possible.
"Relax, sis, you'll get yours," Wade said, sliding a plate over with a grin. "Pancakes hot off the grill, fresh from your favorite brother-slash-master-chef."
Laura, still watching him in stoic silence, grabbed a pancake off the stack closest to her. She tore off a piece, popping it into her mouth and chewing slowly. Wade held his breath, waiting for the judgment from his younger sister. She blinked once, paused, then nodded very, very slightly.
Victory.
"Alright, pancake critics," Wade said, brushing off his hands theatrically. "I think my masterpiece is complete. Ken, Laura, dig in. I've only got... 800 more to serve to the rest of the mansion."
Ken, without hesitation, grabbed two pancakes, stacking them high with syrup and butter. "Best pancakes ever!" he declared, sending a wave of syrup splashing across the table.
Wade snorted. "Easy for you to say, squirt. You're not the one who's gonna have to explain to Mom why the kitchen looks like the set of Pancake Armageddon."
Just as the last pancake slid from the griddle, the kitchen door swung open, revealing Logan, his brow furrowed in confusion. He took in the chaotic scene: flour dusted everywhere, pancake towers teetering on plates, and Wade standing proudly at the helm like a breakfast pirate who'd just discovered the treasure of the Ancient Pancake Island.
"What the hell happened in here?" Logan muttered, shaking his head.
Wade gestured grandly to the pancake carnage. "Breakfast. Do you want a pancake? Come on let's have a taste~~~"
Logan sighed, he then started rummaging through the cupboards. Probably looking for a drink, Wade noted. He can't blame him, he would too if his kid just made a fucking mess like thousands pancakes breakfast.
"Looking for something?"
"I need a drink."
"Uh, yeah, there's some bourbon in there, upper cabinet." Wade pointed at some cabinet.
Logan spotted the cupboard and ambled over, opening it to find a hidden stash of alcohol.
"You've got to be kidding me," he said, pulling out a bottle. "How did you know?"
Before Wade could answer, Ken peeked over his seat, bouncing on his heels. "Is that for the pancakes, Dad? Can I have some?"
"Yeah, no kid, this one is for adult only,"
"Well, we couldn't get drunk any-"
"Wade…"
"Okay, I'll shut up, oh hey Mom! Pancakes?"
Just then, Rogue walked in, her eyes widening at the pancake mountain and the chaos surrounding it. "Jesus, what the heck is going on here?" she exclaimed, her mouth hanging open.
"Pancakes!" Ken shouted, waving his hands enthusiastically. "Wade made like a thousand of them!"
Rogue's expression shifted from disbelief to pure maternal pride. "A thousand? You can't be serious."
"Oh, I'm serious!" Wade said, offering a pancake like a proud chef presenting a masterpiece. "Want one? They're totally not burned—mostly!"
Rogue approached the counter, glancing at the syrup and toppings artfully arranged alongside. "Well, it looks like you've got everything ready. I might just indulge in a pancake or two."
Logan kissed her and handed her the bottle he found earlier, raising an eyebrow. "You might need this."
"Thanks," she took the alcohol Logan handed her while taking a seat next to Ken, who was eagerly eyeing the pancakes and the bourbon in his mother hands.
(We might have a little alcoholic in the making at our hand now,)
I mean, his father is Logan… Also isn't Rogue like liquor too? Yeah, that's fate is sealed.
as everyone settled into the pancake feast, a small voice piped up from the corner of the table with an equally small hand pushing her plate away. "Pancake."
All heads snapped toward Laura, eyes wide.
"Did I hear that right?" Wade exclaimed, nearly dropping his pancake. "That's her first word, right? YEAAH LET'S FUCKING GO, LAURA!"
Logan smacked Wade on the head with a scowl. "Language!"
"But that's your catchphrase!" Wade shot back, rubbing his head.
Rogue's eyes sparkled with tears of joy, unable to contain her emotion. "That's my girl first word!"
Laura, still fixated on her plate, pushed it again, insisting, "Pancake."
Wade grinned like he'd just won a super lottery. "That's close enough! Here you go!" He drizzled chocolate syrup over her pancake with a flourish, creating a masterpiece worthy of any culinary magazine.
Ken leaned over, his eyes bright. "Can I have some too?" he asked, bouncing in his seat. "I want a pancake with, like, a mountain of syrup!"
"Sure thing, little bro! Pancakes for everyone!" Wade proclaimed, moving to create a syrupy paradise.
Rogue watched, heart swelling as Wade showered Laura with attention. "That's right, Laura! You're doing so great!" she encouraged, smiling through the happy tears.
Laura took a tentative bite of her syrup-drenched pancake, her expression a mix of concentration and bliss. Then, with chocolate smudged on her cheek, she smiled and said, "Pancake!" again, as if it were the greatest word in the world.
-
Wade had never sat still in a class for this long. Ever. It was almost too out of character, if you asked him. He usually already bolted out of the window the minute his teacher took their first word.
His foot tapped against the leg of the desk, his fingers drumming a rhythm on the wooden surface, doing everything in their power to resist the overwhelming urge to bolt through the window. Or at least cause some minor chaos. But no. He had made a promise—a pinky swear kind of promise—to his parents and even Scott, of all people, that he'd take school "at least semi-seriously".
(I knew we shouldn't give out our pinkies promise easily, they are so expensive to keep!)
We got forced by our mother remember, that sweet smile she gave out at that night, terrifying.
And so here he was. Still. Breathing. Doing his best impression of a model student. Well, what he thinks model student would act at least.
His problem now? His best pals, Jubilee and Peter—aka Colossus—weren't in the same grade. They got to be up in the cool high school classes while Wade was stuck in…whatever grade this was. He was sure this is at least middle school level, right? Technically, Wade wasn't even sure. His attention spans usually lasted about as long as a commercial break before his brain wandered off into thoughts about pancakes, battles with icebears, or the 23 flavors in Dr. Pepper. Creamy Coconut the best by the way.
It is a middle school, we are in grade 7, if you did pay attention in class. Thankfully, I did.
(I didn't, oh hey look! Squirrels! Oh, I like Strawberry ones better!)
But today was different. Today, Wade was determined to try. To be…at least a C-Student, heck even a D-Student. As boring as that sounded.
'Atleast they appreciate my masterpiece of a pancakes this morning, even if there is so many that left over. Who knows that even with this many people in the school, they still couldn't finish thousands of pancakes. I also need to thank Laura and Ken's bottomless stomach because it gonna be more pancakes left over today!'
(There's like hundreds left over, so I said mission accomplish! Did you see the look on Scott! Hah! Thank god we got everything in pictures!)
Most the X-Men are seemingly started to warming up for us now. Maybe be pancakes paradise is the key!
'Everybody loves pancakes!'
Storm was teaching something about Earth and Environmental Science, explaining something about ecosystems. Wade caught himself staring out the window, daydreaming about what would happen if he finally joined the Avengers team.
"Wade!" Storm's voice cut through his daydream like lightning through a cloud. "Are you paying attention?"
(Oh oh, you are in trouble!!!)
I told you we should have pay better attention!
Wade sat up straighter, flashing his signature "I'm innocent, I swear" grin. "Of course, Storm! I was just…uh…thinking about how the delicate balance of nature mirrors…uh…our own internal struggles?"
Storm's eyebrow raised, skeptical. "Is that so? Then perhaps you can answer this: What's the main consequence of deforestation on a local water cycle?"
Wade blinked. Uh oh. He was about to give his best nonsense answer when—wait a minute—he actually knew this. He could picture a diagram in his head, something about trees and water and… "Uh…less trees mean less transpiration, which screws up the humidity and precipitation levels, and that leads to more droughts and floods in the area?"
HUH!?!?!?
(HUH?!?!?)
Storm blinked. The entire class turned to stare at him. Heck, Wade was staring at him.
"…Correct," Storm said, her tone laced with suspicion. "You've been paying attention."
Wade blinked back. "I have? I mean, yeah, I have!" He tried not to sound too shocked. Apparently, his brain had absorbed something when he tried to read those books his mom gave him to study.
And that wasn't the only class where he accidentally…succeeded.
(Bold, be honest with me, did actually you help him?)
No! I didn't! It's truly a miracle!
First after Storm classes is History, taught by none other than his dad, Logan.
"Alright, listen up, you little snots," Logan growled, pacing at the front of the class like he was prepping for battle. "We're talkin' the French Revolution today. Bunch of angry people, guillotines, yadda yadda. Anybody know when it kicked off?"
Wade's hand shot up before he could even think about it. "1789! Stormin' of the Bastille. Whole thing was a powder keg waiting to blow, ya know?"
Logan paused mid-step, his gaze slowly swiveling to Wade like he'd just grown a second head. "Uh…yeah. That's right."
Wade blinked. Wait, what? He knew something? His classmates stared at him, and even Logan looked half-impressed, half-suspicious. "Good. Keep that up and you might survive the next quiz," Logan muttered, moving on, but Wade could swear he caught a tiny smirk on his dad's face.
Next was Math, and here's where Wade had expected to cause the most trouble. Scott Summers was at the board, looking like he'd rather be anywhere else.
"Alright, class, let's solve for X," Scott droned, writing up some elaborate equation that looked more like alien hieroglyphics than math. Wade stared at the board for a good 30 seconds before…something clicked.
"Is it…42?" Wade blurted out, more as a joke than anything else.
Scott spun around, irritated as usual. "No, Wade, it's not…wait." He squinted at the board. "It actually is 42."
The room went silent. Scott's expression twisted in between disbelief, confusion and shock. "How did you—"
Wade blinked, still half in disbelief himself. "Wait, I'm right? Like, actually? But I didn't even—"
Scott cut him off, eyes narrowing. "You're telling me you didn't guess that?"
Wade's eyes scanned the equation, and before he even realized it, he was working it out in his head.
"You isolate X by dividing both sides by 6, then square root the answer…" he mumbled to himself, trailing off as he scrawled invisible numbers in the air. He suddenly shot up his hand. "42. The answer's 42, right?"
Scott's face went from shocked to mildly existential. "Well," he muttered, "this is unexpected."
Wade leaned back in his chair, grinning like he'd just discovered a superpower. "Huh. So that's how people do math. Weird."
And then came Biology with Jean Grey. Wade had always felt a little awkward around her, not because she was intimidating, but because…well, telepath. He had a little defence against telepath but still, creeps him out.
They were covering genetic mutations—Wade's favorite topic, for obvious reasons.
"Alright, class," Jean said, her voice gentle but firm, "can anyone explain the process by which mutations pass from one generation to the next?"
Wade was zoning out by this point, imagining what it'd be like if he inherited Rogue's flying ability, when—bam—something clicked again. He raised his hand.
"It's through gametes, right? Mutations are passed to offspring through sex cells. If the mutation's in somatic cells, it doesn't get passed down."
Jean blinked, her surprise palpable. "That's…correct."
Wade blinked back. I'm correct? Again?
Jean gave him an almost proud smile. "Well done, Wade."
Well. This was getting weird.
(Really weird, freaky weird…)
I mean, we did absorb a scientist before but he didn't remember any seven grade subjects so its truly a miracle we could do well in school!
Wade sat at the cafeteria table, still in shock from the morning's events. His brain was trying to process the possibility that he wasn't, in fact, terrible at school—just catastrophically bored. Turns out, when he actually paid attention, stuff like French revolutions and Math weren't as mind-numbingly dull as he'd thought.
But the worst part? Without Jubilee and Peter around to share in his misery, school felt more like solitary confinement. Every time he glanced across the cafeteria, he could see Peter chilling with the high school kids and Jubilee with her upper middle school friends, laughing at jokes he wasn't there to deliver.
Wade sighed, his fingers toying with a now-empty juice carton. 'Maybe skipping class isn't the only option. Maybe I could...skip a grade or two? Get in high school with Peter, maybe? Heck, I'd even settle for a couple of middle school grades, just to sit next to Jubilee.'
Only if Xavier approve it tho, not to mention your parents as well, good luck convincing Rogue…
(I want to sit with them both! In the middle!!!)
He'd rather suffer with Peter by his side or he even taking it only going up few grades in middle school to seat next to Jubilee. That way, when he inevitably got bored again, at least he'd be suffering with his friends. It was genius.
(Are we not your friends?)
We are his tought, we are the one that torture him.
The next thing he knew, he was standing outside Professor X's study, knocking with one hand while texting Jubilee with the other. Oh yeah, did he forget to tell you? This universe is at least ten years more advanced, so everyone here got a phone already, well Nokia and Sony burner kinda phone but a phone nonetheless.
(And we got the real flip phones!!! And blackberry!!!)
We also didn't have to hear that annoying sound every time we tried to connect to the internet.
Inside, Professor X gave Wade a look like he knew exactly what was coming. "I hear you've had quite the day, Wade."
Wade plopped into the chair. "Yeah, and it's weirding me out. I'm somehow too good at this school stuff. So, I was thinking—maybe I can skip grades and join Peter or Jubilee? You know, just to…not die of boredom?"
Professor X raised an eyebrow. "Skipping grades is a possibility, but we'd need to test you first. And there may be other factors at play."
After a few hours of intense testing where Wade's mind wandered about every 10 minutes to things like chimichangas, taco trucks and jetpacks, Professor X gave him the news.
(I still sad we didn't get to visit that shawarma's place…)
Maybe when we finish school and finally try doing our mercenary works, we could visit it.
"Well, Wade, you're certainly bright, but your attention is…scattered. It appears you have ADHD. Nothing we can't work with, but you'll need supplementary sessions with me if you're serious about skipping grades."
"ADHD?" Wade said, processing. "So that's why my brain keeps bouncing around like a pinball machine? That actually explains a lot."
We suspected it from day one.
(We finally get formal diagnosed!!!)
Professor X smiled gently. "It's nothing to worry about. We'll work on it together, and before you know it, you'll be up in high school—if that's still your plan."
Wade grinned. "Oh, it's definitely still the plan. I'd rather suffer with Peter or Jubilee than face another week in school purgatory alone."
-
"ADHD, huh? It does explain a lot," Logan grunted, effortlessly blocking one of Wade's punches. He spun, sidestepping another wild kick as if he'd done it a million times. Because, well, he probably had.
Wade huffed, bouncing back to his feet. "Yeah, I guess. Still doesn't explain the voices in my head, but it does explain why my brain's constantly taking these little solo road trips. Like, 'Hey, let's think about the meaning of life and chimichangas while dodging punches and skipping grades! Also, Pancakes!'"
Logan smirked, raising an eyebrow. "And why you never shut up." Logan smirked, ducking under Wade's next swing. "Skipping grades now, huh? Thought you hated school."
Wade paused mid-punch, blinking. "Hey, that's my thing though. Like I said, I was thinking, if I skip a few grades, I'll finish school way faster. Which, technically, is still skipping school. So…win-win, right?"
Now if you put it like that…
(Whaat! That's genius! I never thought about it that way!)
Logan just rolled his eyes, ducking under Wade's next strike. "Always looking for shortcuts, kid. But you've been doing good in school for a few days now, haven't you?"
"Yeah, actually. Turns out I've been accidentally acing classes because…" He paused, rubbing the back of his head. "Well, turns out when your terrifying mom forces you to read all the textbooks and study it before bed with that sweet-yet-'mess-up-and-I'll-end-you' smile, stuff starts to stick. Who knew terror was such a great motivator?"
She scared me...
(Me too!)
Logan snorted, shaking his head. "Yeah, kid, I get it. I've been on the receiving end of that look more times than I'd like to admit." He swung, and Wade ducked, his eyes wide.
Wade grinned, throwing a half-hearted jab. "Oh, I bet you do, Pops. You do looks one of those guy who only attracted to dangerous women, heck maybe even I am too!"
(We are!)
We are…
Logan shrugged, a small grin forming on his face as he jabbed at Wade, forcing him to jump back. "Terrifying women with sugar-coated threats? Yeah, I learned early on to take 'em seriously."
Wade nodded in agreement, remembering the exact moment Rogue had given him "the look" before school. "That explains why I actually did well in class today. I even answered questions in Storm's class without flunking out, and Cyke's math problem? Nailed it. I think I scared them more than I scared myself."
(Cyke's definitely traumatized lol! Did you see the looks on his face!)
Poor guy…
Logan dodged Wade's half-hearted punch, landing a light tap on Wade's shoulder that sent him stumbling. "That right? Guess you're not as hopeless as I thought. Still... don't let it go to your head. You're not skippin' grades unless you can handle it."
Wade caught his breath, smirking. "Yeah, yeah, but if I gotta suffer through school, might as well do it with Peter or Jubilee, right? At least then I can be bored with friends instead of alone." He then kicked his dad hard, making him stumbling a lot before giving another punch to his dad face.
Logan nodded and caught Wade punch, "Makes sense, now enough chit-chat, I am not as easily distracted as you! Come at me, kid!"
Wade groaned. "Ah, man! It was worth a shot."
With a grin, Logan lunged forward, and Wade, the poor boy, barely had time to react to it.
Just a boring slice of life chapter, to gave Wade some ego boosting and some clear safe space after the Magneto arc and before I threw his life around in the next few chapters! Don't tell him that tho! I still value my life dearly! Also Wade, Dear, if you are reading this, its nothing buddy, I am not like those Spiderman writer or your typical Deadpool writer! Don't worry about it! Eh! Wait, how did you- AAHHHHHHH!!!!!
Você também pode gostar
Comentário de parágrafo
O comentário de parágrafo agora está disponível na Web! Passe o mouse sobre qualquer parágrafo e clique no ícone para adicionar seu comentário.
Além disso, você sempre pode desativá-lo/ativá-lo em Configurações.
Entendi