7Opiniões
- Qualidade de Escrita
- Estabilidade das atualizações
- Desenvolvimento de Histórias
- Design de Personagens
- Antecedentes do mundo
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So many plot holes, the mc is a wimp, and lacks almost any intelligence. Bro had a rifle fighting in a dungeon and was only using a knife. When his whole job is fighting with guns, then when his teammates get beat up by a drake he’s like “ what do I do?” Use the gun. The author is just really bad at writing .
While i usually dont curse this much while reading this novel it had me cursing like a sailor if it's author's first novel i want to respectfully mention to step up your game if not then please just read your own works once, twice, maybe thrice before uploading
Read up to Chapter 18. The positives. - Writing Quality: There are almost no grammatical mistakes, which I guess is worth praising. - Updating Stabilty: This is probably fine? Idk tho, I don't really consider this to be important. Like a few others, I found a few flaws within the book, which I shall name now. (First, I'll write the critics, then I shall give examples of said things happening. The latter DOES contain spoilers, so be wary of that.) 1) Story is too rushed, and there's quite a bit of development missing. 2) Many of the MC's actions and worries don't make sense. I get that he's been transmigrated, but that shouldn't magically erase someone's ability to *think*, and analyze situations. 3) Author straight up ignores a lot of opportunities for character development/world-building, and even "skips" over showing a lot of important things. Examples of each instance mentioned (There ARE spoilers from here on). 1) We don't know a thing about the setting. The focus is almost exclusively on Johan, the MC. We, the readers (and probably even the Author), haven't seen many interactions not involving Johan. We haven't seen how Magic works, in spite of having quite a few of Johan's (mostly unnamed, because they get zero development) classmates who have some aptitude for wielding magic. 2) At first, he's shown to not trust the royal family a bit (he did have a fair reason), but not too long after, he trusts an outlier of said family enough to RUN AWAY with him and some of his classmates (the same ones who, less than 2 months ago, were telling him to off himself. Granted, the 3 classmates didnt participate *actively* in the bullying, but really? Where is the lack of the MC's trust in this entire sequence of events?) also the outlier somehow sounds as an amazing manipulator, better than the family. 3) We had a lot of scenarios like this. It's mostly Johan pulling a life-saving item, without us knowing WHEN he got the points for it. "oh, he was in the dungeon for a week, and he fought a Drake. That's where he got the 12.000 points from" That's just telling, and is another wasted chance at developing the Deus (ex) Machina system. Plus, what kind of quests did he get in order to obtain 12.000 points? The rifle and military clothes used to show off in the hall (and somehow no one having a *single smart thought*, because everyone conveniently forgets about it), the SCAR-something he pulled out against the Drake battle, the recording device he pulled out to record Princess Roselia's conversation (another event that the author did not mention at all, only bringing it up during a conversation with the Crown Prince. I'm sure overhearing THAT talk would have been something good, but alas... nothing), and the many explosive devices he had to give out to his friends. Yeah, that's about it. I'd suggest deleting the book and starting all over again, but it is contracted, so that solution is not usable (since contracted books can't be deleted). PS: got about 3000 letters with this review...
Revelar Spoiler
I like the concept of modern ways in the fantasy world, and this novel have logic
overall its good 👍, just one problem...... its too JAPANESE!!mawgawd the mc is so trusting,he behaves the average Japanese mc too spineless,too soft ,believes in the power of friendship...... OK I'm done ranting. but I do recommend this
Unfortunately, I can't recommend this story. It has wasted so much of my time with filler content. The dialogue, plot, conflicts, and even character development are all uninteresting. I read this because it had a nice story idea, but that was all it had. A nice idea. In reality the story was boring, character's personalities are unknown even to the author, so much so that they are inconsistent, character backgrounds are the same here as well, so don't have high expectations for that either. The world is extreemly generic and boring. This looks like it was made in ChatGPT.
So many plot holes, the mc is a wimp, and lacks almost any intelligence. Bro had a rifle fighting in a dungeon and was only using a knife. When his whole job is fighting with guns, then when his teammates get beat up by a drake he’s like “ what do I do?” Use the gun. The author is just really bad at writing .
While i usually dont curse this much while reading this novel it had me cursing like a sailor if it's author's first novel i want to respectfully mention to step up your game if not then please just read your own works once, twice, maybe thrice before uploading
Read up to Chapter 18. The positives. - Writing Quality: There are almost no grammatical mistakes, which I guess is worth praising. - Updating Stabilty: This is probably fine? Idk tho, I don't really consider this to be important. Like a few others, I found a few flaws within the book, which I shall name now. (First, I'll write the critics, then I shall give examples of said things happening. The latter DOES contain spoilers, so be wary of that.) 1) Story is too rushed, and there's quite a bit of development missing. 2) Many of the MC's actions and worries don't make sense. I get that he's been transmigrated, but that shouldn't magically erase someone's ability to *think*, and analyze situations. 3) Author straight up ignores a lot of opportunities for character development/world-building, and even "skips" over showing a lot of important things. Examples of each instance mentioned (There ARE spoilers from here on). 1) We don't know a thing about the setting. The focus is almost exclusively on Johan, the MC. We, the readers (and probably even the Author), haven't seen many interactions not involving Johan. We haven't seen how Magic works, in spite of having quite a few of Johan's (mostly unnamed, because they get zero development) classmates who have some aptitude for wielding magic. 2) At first, he's shown to not trust the royal family a bit (he did have a fair reason), but not too long after, he trusts an outlier of said family enough to RUN AWAY with him and some of his classmates (the same ones who, less than 2 months ago, were telling him to off himself. Granted, the 3 classmates didnt participate *actively* in the bullying, but really? Where is the lack of the MC's trust in this entire sequence of events?) also the outlier somehow sounds as an amazing manipulator, better than the family. 3) We had a lot of scenarios like this. It's mostly Johan pulling a life-saving item, without us knowing WHEN he got the points for it. "oh, he was in the dungeon for a week, and he fought a Drake. That's where he got the 12.000 points from" That's just telling, and is another wasted chance at developing the Deus (ex) Machina system. Plus, what kind of quests did he get in order to obtain 12.000 points? The rifle and military clothes used to show off in the hall (and somehow no one having a *single smart thought*, because everyone conveniently forgets about it), the SCAR-something he pulled out against the Drake battle, the recording device he pulled out to record Princess Roselia's conversation (another event that the author did not mention at all, only bringing it up during a conversation with the Crown Prince. I'm sure overhearing THAT talk would have been something good, but alas... nothing), and the many explosive devices he had to give out to his friends. Yeah, that's about it. I'd suggest deleting the book and starting all over again, but it is contracted, so that solution is not usable (since contracted books can't be deleted). PS: got about 3000 letters with this review...
Revelar Spoiler I like the concept of modern ways in the fantasy world, and this novel have logic
overall its good 👍, just one problem...... its too JAPANESE!!mawgawd the mc is so trusting,he behaves the average Japanese mc too spineless,too soft ,believes in the power of friendship...... OK I'm done ranting. but I do recommend this
Unfortunately, I can't recommend this story. It has wasted so much of my time with filler content. The dialogue, plot, conflicts, and even character development are all uninteresting. I read this because it had a nice story idea, but that was all it had. A nice idea. In reality the story was boring, character's personalities are unknown even to the author, so much so that they are inconsistent, character backgrounds are the same here as well, so don't have high expectations for that either. The world is extreemly generic and boring. This looks like it was made in ChatGPT.