Capítulo 29: PTSD (2)

This was something Madeline had promised herself to face alone. When she found out about her disorder, her uncle and Aunt had blamed her for being what she never chose to become.

There was a time when her father never once let her pay a visit to Roland, nor did he let Roland come over to their place.

They were never versed with one another, and whenever her father ended up reading letters Roland had sent, his expression would remain sour throughout the rest of the day.

She never understood the relationship they shared, and she couldn't process why her father had hid her from them until she started living with Roland. After her parents death, her father's executor made a statement that she was too underaged to run a house, and that led to Roland legally taking over her father's property for the meantime till she gets married.

She was still heavily struck by her parents' death to picture the right from wrong. She had escaped death that certain night and she needed emotional support. So she accepted them, not knowing that was the start of her grievance.

They locked her in her room, giving her no freedom to move around and turning her into a slave in her father's home. Due to her already depressed state, their harsh attitude towards her only increased her trauma. Most times she'd go to bed hungry, and wake up sweating with the image of her parents' death flashing before her eyes.

There was no comfort, she had no one to run to, or even speak to about what was happening to her. That was when the voice inside of her began to fade, and she became the mute child who would foolishly accept what was given to her.

Days, weeks, months continuously passed by, and her trauma grew worse with each day. Roland and Auriela never really gave a damn about it until she passed out at the age of thirteen.

That was the day she figured out about her disorder.

Grabbing hold of her dress to avoid her hands from trembling at the painful memories of her life, she continued to speak to the one man who gave her his attention.

"PTSD is a serious mental health condition that is triggered when…"

"....when a person experiences shocking, scary or dangerous events. And yours was triggered after the accident." Cassian completed her statement like he knew the end story and she looked at him. Her eyes were already brimming with tears and she lowered her head in guilt.

Madeline could tell he figured it out already.

"I promise I never wanted to hide it from you. I was just scared at first that just like everyone else, I'll be abandoned again. Apart from my uncle, the rest of my family left me after assuming I was a crazy psychopath who became abnormal. And Roland, he only kept me because of my inheritance he planned on owning."

"I promise I've tried my best to control my trauma, but my uncle and Aunt, they didn't bother about what was going on with me, so I had to face it alone. I_I wanted to tell you before our marriage, I never p..planned on hiding it I…"

"Calm down." Once again, Cassian had to silence her up when she began shaking, to his alarm. "Come with me." He led her to the bed and gently made her sit on it.

He poured a glass of water in a cup and handed it to her. "Here, drink this first, and try to relax." He said sedately.

Madeline reached for the water in his grasp and took a sip. Her nerves were acting up again, and she forgot to take her medicine from Roland's place.

"It's not your fault, so don't blame yourself." He rubbed the skin in between his brows before brushing his fingers into his hair, looking annoyed with every single one of her family.

Just how much has she suffered in the hands of her uncle to feel afraid of even speaking. He noticed she was always nervous each time he said something, or she was feeling guilty about something that she doesn't even need to feel guilty for.

She even takes permission before speaking.

He was starting to regret letting her uncle go with just one leg, clearly it's his mistake. He should have shot both legs and make the man crawl to his house before putting an end to his fucking misery.

Returning his gaze to Madeline, she had dropped the cup on the side table and now had her gaze fixed on her hands that rested on her lap. He could hear her sniffle, like she was holding back the tears that had been threatening to spill from her eyes.

"It's okay." Out of pure instinct, he tried to pet her by stroking her hair one at a time. Madeline leaned into his soothing touch as she rested her head on his lower abdomen. They stayed that way for a few minutes, using the silence as a moment for her to recover before he pulled her back.

He leaned forward, bringing his face closer to the grieving Madeline who only blinked the lingering tears away. He moved a strand of her hair behind her ear before returning his attention to her dark orbs that now glowed naturally with a warm bluish light swirling in those irises.

"You have absolutely nothing to be worried about. Where's the bold lady who requested for her uncle to be shot on the leg? I must admit that I fancy that part of you. Don't be afraid to tell me things out of fear Maddie, I won't hurt you and I can give you my word on that."

His comforting words were the only thing that was capable of easing Madeline and she nodded, giving his words some acknowledgement.

"Your face is red, are you blushing already?" Cassian's lips curved into a mischievous smile as he noticed the pink hue that unmistakably adorned her upper cheek bone.

Madeline's eyes widened and she immediately lowered her head, feeling bashful that he noticed her blushing over their intense proximity.

How cute.

"Aren't you curious to know where I'm heading?" He asked, and when she said nothing, he told her either way.

"I'm paying a visit to your uncle's place." The moment he said it, Madeline's smile slowly vanished from her lips and she lifted her head to meet his gaze.

"My uncle's place? W_Why??"

"I'm married to you, aren't I? I have to brace your uncle and his Aunt with gifts for accepting our marriage."

"They accepted?"

"It's for their own good." Standing straight, his Amber-brown eyes glinted in a way that made Madeline feel like he's plotting something extremely dangerous.

"I planned on going alone with the gifts, but how about you come with me. It might be the last time they get to see their lovely niece again."