Capítulo 20: James Potter | Gift
"So, can I have a kiss now?" His smile radiates everywhere. I feel like my day gets brighter every time I see those smiles. If only he knows how I truly feel and he wasn't fooling around like this.
"When will you stop being annoying, Potter?" I asked, raising a brow at him when he only pouted, before leaning closer to my face.
"You think I'm annoying? My feelings are hurt," he exclaimed, even clutching his chest to make it more dramatic.
Sirius, Remus, and Peter only laugh as they watch their friend goof around. I rolled my eyes before grabbing my quill from James's hand, which he had playfully taken from me earlier.
"Why don't you just accept it when I tell you I like you?" he asked, his face inches away from mine.
I was about to answer him when Lily arrive. Placing a stack of books on the table and sitting across from me. In just a blink of an eye, he was gone. James leaps off the table and sits beside her. The answer to his question is too obvious.
How could I take him seriously, when the moment Lily arrives, his eyes are glued to her?
I bit my lower lip to stop myself from cursing him, as I watch him tease Lily, who hides her smile behind her feign annoyance. I felt a pang in my chest, and feel like it was suddenly getting darker. Not saying anything, I gather my things and hurried out of the Great Hall. Not looking back even once.
It has always been like that. James would keep telling me that he likes me. That he likes my eyes, my smiles, and even my laughs which I find annoying. He would also ask for kisses and will sulk if I turn him down. He would dedicate most of his time to me, but the moment Lily arrives, I'm out of the picture. How could he expect me to accept his confessions when I know that he meant none of it?
Yet, here I am. Stupidly hoping that one day my feelings will be acknowledged. That he'll notice just how much I like him. Pathetic.
"He won't stop fooling around if you don't tell him what you truly feel?" I look up from the book I was reading and see Sirius feet away from my table. He motion his head to the empty seat beside me, and I just nodded.
He place the book he was holding beside mine, before taking a sit. His eyes glance at my neck, and I instinctively touch whatever is around it, just to feel the scarf that James gifted me on my sixteenth birthday. Sirius sighed, and prop his elbow on the table before leaning his chin on it.
"You're turning seventeen next week. Do you think James will give you something again?" I smiled at him and shake my head. Genuinely discarding the thought.
"James gave me this scarf because I asked him to give me something for my birthday, not because he planned to. Besides, he only remembers my birthday because you guys would always remind him. Yet, he never forgets Lily's."
To say that I felt pathetic for saying that is an understatement. I feel like drowning on the spot. I suddenly can't breathe upon remembering how James would always give Lily anything on her birthday.
Taking a deep breath and shaking my head, I push back the painful thoughts behind me. Looking at Sirius to see him staring at me.
"Until when will you endure everything?" This time I laugh, earning a scowl from the Librarian who walks past our table.
"When you're like this, It's hard to see the Sirius that always gets in trouble with his friends."
"Don't change the topic, Y/N. I'm serious," he stated, sitting properly and looking directly into my eyes. I was about to make a pun connecting what he said to his name, but the lack of a smile on his face stop me from doing so.
Sighing to myself once again, I look back at him.
"You don't need to feel trouble with my situation, Sirius. After all, I don't have any plans to keep being pathetic like this. Do you think I'm not getting tired? Once I find the right time, I'll end everything. Along with this feeling I have for him."
✓
"Can I have that kiss today?" I take a deep breath and turn around to face James.
"No, James. There's no kiss to be given. Will you stop asking for that?" I know my annoyance was clear in my tone, so I don't know if James is just honestly numb and oblivious, or he just simply doesn't care as long as he's having fun.
Like he always does, he ignored my remark and laugh. Hurrying to stand on my side as I continue walking down the corridor toward the next class.
Sirius, Remus, Peter, and Lily must have gone into the classroom first since I didn't see them in the Great Hall or with James, who was walking alongside me.
"If I ask you out will you say yes?" I let out a tired sigh, before turning to him once again.
"Are you having fun teasing me like this? It's tiring." I asked, my jaw clenching as I stare straight into his eyes.
He must have noticed that I wasn't smiling anymore. His smile faded, and his confident posture went slack. His shoulder slump as he looks back at me.
"Did I do something wrong, Y/N? Are you mad?" I scoff, shaking my head before leaving him standing alone in the middle of the corridor as I rush to the classroom.
"Where's James?" Lily started after I took a seat beside her. I almost take emotions out on her, but I met Sirius' eyes. He was sitting on her other side.
He gave me a knowing look, followed by a shake of his head. I close my eyes, calming myself and feeling bad at the same time for almost taking out my annoyance at Lily.
"I didn't see him." I lied smoothly, avoiding her eyes instead of taking out my paper and quill.
"That's odd. James personally told me that he will wait for you so you guys could go together here." I turn to Lily, my brows furrowing. Confuse with why James would do such a thing.
"Why would James wait for me? I mean, he has never done that before."
"What do you mean never? He always waits for you. Exactly- every day. But it's either you're with Sirius, or you're ignoring him." Mouth agape, I look at Sirius, who only gave me a small smile. My eyes widen when I realize I have been stupid all this time.
I tried to rush out of the room and search for James, but Professor McGonagall arrive. I tried to tell her that there was an urgent thing I need to take care of, but she didn't allow me to step out. I waited for James in the class, but he didn't come. He skipped all our classes the whole day. I saw him at the Great Hall in the afternoon, but when our eyes met, he stands up from his seat and walk past me.
There was a painful throbbing in my chest, and my body suddenly felt heavy. But I was determined to talk to him. So, I sit beside him that night in the Great Hall, muttering a sorry to Remus, whom I practically push off.
"James. I need to" But before I can finish what I'm going to say, he stands up, turning his back on me.
I grab his arm, trying to make him look at me.
"Where are you going?" he didn't answer me. He only takes my hand off his arm, before leaving the Great Hall.
I stand there watching as his back disappeared behind the huge door. I wanted to cry that very moment, but that will only gather attention to me.
✓
It's been a week since what happened. And it's been a week since James started avoiding me. We would always see each other in the Great Hall. We would even sit at the same table along with the others, but he won't meet my eyes or even talk to me.
The others tried to help me. Lily told me that she tried to ask James to talk to me, but James only shakes his head. They just don't know what's wrong with him.
I woke up early that morning for no particular reason. Groggy and annoyed that I woke up early than the usual time I do. All I wanted was to sleep and hide in my bed the whole day. It's Sunday and I have no classes. So, instead of leaving, I holed up in my room.
I close my eyes once again, and when I thought I was about to fall asleep, the door burst open, revealing a gaping Lily when she the state I was in. She rushes to my bed, grabbing at my arm before pulling me up. I groan at how hard she did so, it felt like my bone somewhat got misplaced.
"What are you doing, Lily?" I groan again when she kept tugging at me.
"I should be the one asking you that. We're supposed to go to Hogsmeade today." I let her pull me up, feeling groggy more than ever.
"I don't want to go," I mumble, my eyes still close.
"That won't do, Y/N. Today is your birthday too, so we are going to Hogsmeade whether you like it or not."
Frowning, I look at my bedside table where there stands a calendar with moving butterflies as a design. I could see the big red circle around the number 22 of November. I rub my face with my palms, shocked to realize that I just forgot my birthday because of how stressed I am these past few days.
Lily helped me prepare, even though it was just mostly her taking care of what I needed. She hand me a casual black lace dress with belt inches above the knees and paired it with black knee-high boots. I wanted to tie my hair, but Lily told me to just let it down.
Once we were done, we rush out of the room. Sirius, Remus, and Peter were already waiting for us at the gate. They were standing beside the carriage. My eyes instinctively search for James but found him nowhere.
"James left early. He didn't say why." Sirius whispered after he stand on my side, helping me up on the carriage.
The short excitement that build up after Lily reminded me about my birthday, went down the drain. Was he that mad to not even greet me happy birthday? I wasn't asking for any gift. Nothing at all. Seeing him would be enough. But he wasn't even here at all.
It didn't take long to arrive at Hogsmeade. We all just followed Lily around. After all, she's practically dragging us. Particularly me. We check all stores we can get into. The others bought things from them. They even gave me gifts.
Sirius gifted me a sequence bracelet with a butterfly inside a small orb. Peter gave me a red scarf. Then Remus gave me a book titled 'The Girl who drew Butterflies, while Lily gifted me three new dresses. Varying from Black, white, and Blue. Mostly all the dresses I currently have in my wardrobe back in Hogwarts were from her.
I hugged all of them, muttering thank yous. They made my day, and I suddenly felt bad for feeling that something was missing. Someone's missing. Before they notice the sudden change in my mood, I push all those thoughts to the back of my head. Smiling brightly as Lily wraps her hand around my arms, once again dragging me along.
Our next and last stop was Three Broomsticks. Sirius immediately ordered Butterbeer which we are all obsessed with. James is by far the most fanatic of it amongst the group. Lily ordered a Chocolate Trifle which consisted of layers of chocolate cake, fresh berries, and cream.
It was fun. I was laughing along with Sirius' silly and corny jokes. And I thought I was finally too distracted to remember something painful. Until I saw him. I even squint my eyes to see if I was seeing right.
James is currently peaking through the small window of Three Broomsticks. His eyes are searching for something... or someone. When our eyes met, he suddenly disappeared from the window. I didn't waste any more seconds and rushed out after him. Ignoring the calls of the others as they try to ask where I'm going.
I frantically search for him amongst the large crowd, looking left and right to see where he run off to. But he didn't run. He was just there. Standing across the road, staring at me. A wide smile formed across his lips when I met his eyes.
Biting my lower lip, I slowly walk toward him. Not minding if I bump into anyone, as long as I reach him. As fast as I can before he can run away again.
"Hi..." he started, which I didn't answer. I just stared at him, making sure I wasn't seeing things. I felt my hand move, and before I realize it, I was already cupping his face.
And when the thought of him standing there finally sink in, I burst into tears.
"Wait! Y/N, why are you-" I didn't think twice, I just embrace him as tight as I can. Fearing that If I let go, I won't see him again.
His hands slowly wrap around me. His lips brushed on my head as he gave me a soft kiss.
"Where have you been? I was looking for you this whole week! I wanted to talk to you so bad it feels like I'm losing my mind. But why do you have to avoid me?" I cried, burying my head against his chest as he softly caressed my back.
"Who told you I was avoiding you? This is our last year. We're finally graduating, so I wanted to give you something more special that no one else can give you on your birthday. But I didn't realize that it occupied me for a whole week."
I look up at him, meeting his eyes as he smiles at me. He chuckles when I sniff, softly wiping away my tears with his thumbs.
"Then why aren't you talking to me? Was it because of that day when I left you standing alone in the corridor?" his brows furrowed for a moment, thinking of what I was talking about, before laughing when he realized what it was.
"No, Y/N. It's nothing like that. I skip all the classes that whole day because I needed to take care of something. I wasn't talking to you because I fear that I might spill what it was. After all, I can't resist anything when it comes to you."
I was done crying when he finished talking. But I'm still not letting him go. He wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me closer before kissing my forehead.
"I'm sorry. I didn't know you were feeling like this and was worried." he playfully ruffle my hair. His arms tightened around me.
"So, what was that very important thing you needed to take care of so bad you were out of reach for a whole week?" he smiled at me before letting me go. I did the same thing and watch him grab a paper bag beside him. He hands it to me with a wider smile. His excitement is evident.
I was confused for a moment, opening the paper and looking inside. Only for my eyes to widen when I saw several things. There were boxes with intricate butterfly designs. Ribbons wrap around every box along with notes sticking into it. I hand the bag back to him, before checking the things inside one by one.
The first one contained a brown quill with a butterfly sticking in the middle of the handle. The butterfly's wings had a golden brown and black pattern.
The second one was a glass rose. It was a glass, and it changes color between purple and red when twirling it.
The third and last one was a silver bracelet with the words Mi Amor etched on it. I hand it to James, and when he saw my gaze he already knew what he needed to do. He softly place the paper bag down, and wore the bracelet on my right wrist since Sirius' gift was on my left.
"You know, I know what this means right?" I said, talking about the words on the bracelet. He only nodded, a smile still plastered on his lips.
I put all the gifts back in the paper bag. James carefully places them down before looking back at me.
"What do you think?" I bit my lower lip to stop myself from blushing when I realize just how good he looks.
There wasn't anything new. He looks the same, but at the same time, he looks different. He looks... way happier than I've seen him before.
"They're all beautiful, James. They're all perfect." he chuckles at my response, once again pulling me closer into his body.
"Perfect just like you." My cheeks felt hot, and I was sure I was turning red, but I didn't care.
"Are they the gifts for my birthday? Why are there so many? Just you being here is enough." he shakes his head. Then he started sheepishly scratching the back of his head. Avoiding my gaze. "What? What is it?"
"Well, yes. They're my gifts for your birthday. But not for this day." I was confused. He let out a sigh before looking back at me. "You see, they're your gifts since we were third years. I started buying you gifts when I realize I like you back in the third year, but I don't have the guts to give them to you. I was only able to give you one, last year because you asked me for it."
My mouth was open after what he said. Third-year? Does he like me since we were third years? Is he saying that he likes me a year longer than I've liked him and I didn't notice anything at all? Just how stupid was I?
"Then... Where's my gift for this birthday?" I can't help the smile on my lips.
That's when James pulled something out of his pants. A small violet velvet box. With wide eyes and a breath hitch stuck in my throat, I look at James' eyes. And it was all I need to know that everything's real. That I wasn't dreaming. That James felt the same as I do.
"Y/N... Will you be my girlfriend with an intention of marriage?" James asked, kneeling on one knee and opening the violet velvet box. Revealing a gorgeous sparkling silver ring with a small diamond above an intricate one that looks like a crown.
"Yes..." I answered, bawling out my eyes as I held out my right hand. James laughs, placing the ring on my ring finger, before pulling me into a kiss.
His arms wrap tightly around my body. We both flinch and pull away from each other when we heard screams. We turn around only to realize that a lot of people had gathered to watch us.
Sirius, Remus, and Peter then run toward James. Pulling their friend into a tight hug, messing with his head as they tease how sly he is. Lily hugged me. So tight, it felt like I was going to lose air. She was squealing. Shouting congratulations along with the lines of 'I know this is going to happen.'
James and I look at each other before laughing along with our friends.
"You look perfect, Y/N," James said, looking at my dress.
"You're not bad yourself, Potter." I laugh as he pulls me into a kiss once again. This time, it was longer, as if we were catching up from all the times we missed each other. "And this is the best birthday gift you could give me. Your love."
✓
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