In Regards To Criticism, Advice And Story Plot
The comments are free! No SS payment, no credit donation required, talk, scream and whine to your heart's content!
Whether you get answered or not, though, is fully dependant on my mood. I can ignore a kind thank you but I can also swear back at bad Rickies. This novel - if we can call it that - was written as a contradiction to my darker mindset that takes things a little too serious and wants to be a bit too much realistic in regards to writing, meaning that I will never take things seriously here, and, even if contents for "17 and above only" appear, they will most probably get glanced at and be used as carpet for an Oppa Gangnam Moonwalk straight to blows and murder.
As for advice, I may take them if some writing genius or lucky wannabe suddenly sprouts and spouts a load of miracle plot... or if they recommend a nice, fast-paced and gloriously irritating novel for me to skim through and reference in either a bad joke or a broken Volume of mine.
Just beware of criticism concerning character development, I may - and will - whine and wheeze at you if I see anything along the lines of "Can't he take things seriously?" or "I want harem!". YES! There is no harem here! In fact, anything close to romance would ruin my protagonist.
Anyway, Volumes will be separated between worlds and before every world, I will be announcing the main references used to make them and the reason they made it to here. I warn, while there are references being boldly used here, this is definitely not a fan-fiction; I'd have to apologize for so many people for messing their beloved stories otherwise.
But let's not get stuck in these trivialities, yeah? The first world will be mostly based on Infinite Cosmos: Somethin' Somethin'; that harem fan-fiction here in Webnovel that is weirdly too popular for what it turned out to be.
That novel has succeeded in annoying me on so many levels you cannot imagine!
First off: The writing is damn good and comes at a constant fast-paced rate that it started antagonizing Stephen King, meaning that you can definitely expect good things from it... but it's harem focused.
Don't get me wrong, it's not simply because the thing's a harem that I dropped it; as I said, the writing is hella good, which means the author can pack a lot of words in a short time frame plot-wise, and I mean a lot.
I don't remember how high was the record, but the guy has probably managed to squeeze a hundred chapters into a week of storytime already. The result? A draaaaaag...
Second: I don't know if the author ever thought about his protagonist's backstory further than to tell how good and pitiful of a guy he really is, but man... that is just disturbing.
The protagonist never had a proper life and when he died he swore to be free, never to be jailed by others again... then he enters Danmachi world, meets ten thousand baes and chains himself to them.
A kid that could only be called a Saint in both unwilling deeds and barely established personality turns - in a matter of months - into a sexual deviant because the hundred thousand baes he wanted to make happy were mostly thinking of banging him, thus inducing the poor kid to believe that all the girls he's close to can be happy by doing him or him doing them.
By the time someone more "normal" comes around, he's far too gone and she falls too.
The "normal" person describes him as "broken" then, but she was wrong; the protagonist was 14 at the time of his death in his first life, his only contact to the outside world was the entertainment allowed to him in the form of books and stuff so that he would keep a healthy mind and not die off randomly because of some mental sickness; the child was a blank canvas turned into a sex toy and that... is disturbing.
Got my meaning? Good.
Third: As the writing is pretty damn good, you can see a lot of clear character development going around, mainly in the form of the protagonist's power of understanding his close ones' wishes and pasts.
But because the guy is such a beacon - or better, shining dildo - the millions of baes are simply rushing up to him and dumping their dreams and wannabes on top of his "weight".
Now, if you paid attention to my personality in regards to stories and books, you'll notice that I'm probably a crazy realist that will evaluate a story according to how it follows societal rules while inside a society, or whether its characters exist as proper people.
Now, the story happens inside the CITY of Orario, so you can expect that they live in a society; whether its normal for people there to all go straight to shenaneging the barely 15 years old kid? I don't know!
As for the "proper people" part though... do you consider the characters in a story that can only rely on the protagonist in order to advance as a person to be a proper person? No independence, no "growing alongside the character" kind of thing, no nothing in regards to their most important trait as a human being?
I don't care if they are some Goddess of the Forge or some Sword Princess or whatever, but being passively oriented here will only make things worse after the monstrosity you turned Vahn into!
Phew! I turned the thank you reference into a review so long no sane person would read it. But this part is over, I'll try to write really quickly now that I'm still relatively free, I believe I'll be living hell once month six is upon us. Let's hope this passion lasts.
PENSAMENTOS DOS CRIADORES 
LostSoldier1
LostSoldier1 Let's post the actual chapter at another time, alright? In a year or two...
Also... the reference's name was apparently Endless Path: Infinite Cosmos, sorry.
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