Ruby_Red_8541

I appreciate your response so I think I will clarify. First I love your work and I do not mean this in a malinois way. The reason my 2 responses are diffrent is because the context is diffrent. In the previous chapter it seemed as if the MC went on a tangent clarifying that transphobia is not okay.It felt somewhat out of place and doesn’t alliegn with anything in your writing of the MC previously. Your reader dose not need you to tell them in a long passage that transphobia is bad and gender roles suck. If you want to make commentary on discrimination, add it into the story in a way that feels natural and allows the reader to engage with the material. Either commit to including your opinions on gender discrimination in your story or simplfy the idea you are trying to include in a simpler way. I say that because a lot of that chapter seemed to be over complicating gender identity and had a lot of repeatative ideas. As for your short story, it’ short and sweet but I haven’t learned why it was made or posted on the story. My statement stands that your story is a fairly surface level type novel. I am privileged enough to be surrounded by a very progressive community abd ideas that you presented in the story were seen by me as sort of base line. So for your main story that has previously not include topics about gender identity, I would recommend something diffrent from a short story solely focused on gender identity. I hope all of that came across the way I wanted it too. This would be easier in a conversation and I am thankful for your response. Again, I mean this not to be offensive and this is ment to be constructive criticism so I am sorry if you found this unhelpful. Thank you for your time <3

Honestly it feels like you over explained yours/the main charecters views a lot during this chapter. It’s okay to be ignorant/make a mistake and people will tell you and you can edit the chapter. I would keep it simple, because the more in depth you go into technical stuff the more backlash you will get

This is the most controversial point and biggest charecter building that has happened thus far

Yall rember that translater that was forced to compete in one of these idol competeions and he hated it so much and worked so hard to get out but everyone kept voting for him because it was funny....yeah

I love that the author isnt making the MC dumb

I volenter

I just relixed that the spicy chicken author is you...you are the spicy icken author. I thought it was a charecter we would be introfuced to later...I thought it was an important plot point