Thanks for the chapter. I was well written but I have to say that you have made John too strong to be in a group. The power scaling is too abrupt, he has become a one man army. At this point John is acting like what he criticized the avengers on Earth 666 to be.
Hello author here with a personal review as a reader. writing quality - 4 stars My first time writing a book, so expect some spelling errors as I don't have an editor at the moment. story development - 4 stars Everything that has happened so far in the story has a reason, and directs towards something else. character design - 5 stars My preference for character types. update stability - 3 stars Fluctuating between 4 - 5 chapters a week, adjustable in some circumstances. World background - 4 stars Hints are given but not concretely explained.
thanks for that
Honestly the co-dependency of the main character and his sister really really bothers me. If you want to make the sister a co-lead, then give us some background about her and don't try to force the constant need for her input in his activities.
I like the way it was started, he is stoic and goofy with thick mind to relationships. ......but to train a captive, or someone he has decided is not worthy to work at his shop, there was no logic to that story development. He trained his sister's pet so that she could advertising for his shop, he did the same for the first girl, but this has no reason at all. ...I understand that the characters have to develop, but please make it in line with the current character development line. He is more accepting of people and accepts them when it coincidences with his business. .....otherwise great story keep at it.
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original Book of Creation
"I walk through creation to find my way" "Am I an observer or am I to participate" follow the life a normal person thrust into a new world where anything and everything does happen.35 Chs 47 お気に入り
things are about to ramp up. Be prepared
Book of Creation
Fantasy · ben7574