章 4: Chapter 2 The closest restroom please ....Why is thereee a back hole
Falling... Falling... Falling... The urge to pee. Wait what the urge to pee yes finally feeling, I can feel again. Yes, yes yeaahhhs. Gah!!! Why does it hurtrt so baddd ahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahaaaaaaa! Why, why, whyyyyy!!!!!!!
While I was screaming mentally in the void of nothingness, I barely noticed the changes to my surroundings.
"Hello, hello excuse me, "a voice says out of nowhere.
"Huh? ", aren't I the only one here.
"Ah, finally. Welcome to the M-system I'm your new best friend and only conversational set for the next... Let's see... Few thousand eons…... Maybe? ", the voice continues.
"Wait, what? ", how does that even happen.
"Oh yeah, it's going to be awhile before were fully ready to do what we need to do with you. " the voice finishes.
"And what would that be?", it better not be hentai.
" Well, let's see. There's this whole problem with too many worlds being filled up." The voice sounding perplexed continues, " Didn't you not watch the company video? "
"What company video?", When was there a company video.
:|
" Excuse me for one second BF." The voice says distractedly.
'BF? I hardly know you. And what is this "company video". Did I join a pyramid scheme? Is my afterlife one huge bureaucratic pyramid scheme?', I think freaking out.
"Ah, here it is." As soon as the weird and oddly familiar says this, the intense feeling of pain and needing to pee happens again and again and again, "So, do you understand now?"
"Why does understanding mean pain and needing to pee? ", my voice coming out just barely as I "wince" from the pain.
"Wait, what? "
Scanning…
<Error detected>
"Oh, it looks like we put video in the wrong place. ", the voice says bluntly.
"What's that supposed to mean?", I say starting to feel increasingly annoyed.
Well you see, the voice pauses for dramatic effect, "We put in your bladder. " the voice says all the while there is confetti and a slight fanfare going on.
: |
"I'm sorry but you put It in my freaking bladder." I almost scream. "do I Even have a bladder." I mumble under my breath just enough so the voice can hear.
"Ummn," the voice starting to panic starts to reply before I cut it off.
"You know what don't answer that. ", I say not wanting to have an anatomy lesson at the moment.
"My afterlife so far, has been one huge crummy mess." I say feeling as though I should be weeping or crying but being unable. "Figures that this wouldn't go right either. ", I conclude.
"Hey, I can fix this. ", says the familiar voice.
"How? "I ask inquisitively.
Suddenly a knife materializes out of nowhere
"What are you going to do with that?!?!?!?!!?! "
"Don't worry it will only hurt for a little bit. "
"Stay away from me. "
"Come back here". I hear as I'm being chased by floating knife, that for some reason looks like it's smiling.
The banter continues on until finally the knife cuts my leg at which point it starts to bleed a black ooze that turns scarlet, then white and the infinite color stream appears like some funfetti clown on crack's puke. Yes, on crack. How the clown was on crack remains to be seen, but for some reason it does. As soon it starts to start touching the air it's only starts spreading out and spinning round and round until filing a black circle of infinite mass and density that just pulls me in.
I proceeded to ask, " Why is there a rainbow black hole."
"I Don't know," the voice replies and continues, " are you by any chance a virgin? "
>:(
"What?! "
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