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80% Rick And Morty: I Hate Life / Chapter 7: Mega SEEDS (part 2)

章 7: Mega SEEDS (part 2)

AN: Hey, guys here's the chapter I was supposed to post yesterday, again sorry for the delay.

I just got back from my vacation, I couldn't upload the chapter sooner because there was no reception in the way.

Also thank you so much for all the support ❤️ we hit 500 power stones today and I want to let you know I appreciate it also as I promised tomorrow you're going to have 3 extra chapters.

Enjoy the chapter, also feel free to leave a review.

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"Alright, we're here, morty you go sleep, I'll put Rick on the couch, see you in the morning" I said ad I opened the ship's door and lifted Rick princess style.

"Oh, morty before I forget come here, take my phone out of my pocket and take a picture of me and Rick.

"U-um w-w-why do y-you want me to take a picture of you and Rick?" Morty asked me nervously.

"You know for my, uh, the picture book I'm going to make of all of our adventures." I said to morty, lying with a straight face.

"O-oh, OK," he said as he came near me, took my phone out of my pocket, turned it on, and said, "Um, it has a pa-pasword.

"OH yeah, I forgot about that, just type, "balls deep in ophis L-I-J 5896", oh and type them all together without spaces." I said, fully knowing he wouldn't get the references.

"Geez, w-what kinda password is that?" He said, rolling his eyes at me.

"The kind you're not cultured enough to get, you little piece of unclutured shit," i say to him, hmph unclutured swine.

"OK, I got it," he says as he puts my phone back in my pocket.

"Cool, now go sleep. we got school in a couple of hours." I say to him, knowing he's going to sleep in class again.

Me and morty went into the living room. He then went upstairs, I put Rick on the couch and went to my room.

Threw myself in my bed and hugged my body pillow, I think I can't sleep without my little neko pillow at this point.

*Time skip*

I'm currently in the kitchen, making myself some breakfast.

Some bacon, a couple of eggs, toast, and a cup of coffee with vodka mixed in.

FYI, I get all of my ingredients from a dimension I call the breakfast dimension, lame name I know, Because all the inhabitants of that dimension are made of foods that are eaten at breakfast time.

Although I prefer not to think about my food being alive.

I just go to the breakfast dimension shoot a couple of the little ones with my Frankenstein gun and boom fresh top grade ingredients.

If you're wandering what my Frankenstein gun does, the simple version is that when you shoot objects that are inorganic and considered "not alive" the object becomes alive, it's really cartoonic the get two eyes (sometimes just a single eye) and a mouth, if you shoot the now "alive" object it will turn inorganic.

After making my breakfast fast, I go and sit with the rest of the family at the table.

As I sit down, Jerry says, "I see there's a new episode of that singing show tonight. Who do you guys think is gonna be the best singer?" Jerry says and right after saying that Morty falls asleep at the table, smashing his face into his plate.

Seeing morty smashing his face on his plate, summer, says, "Oh my God, his head is in his food. I'm going to puke." Right after summer saying that Beth says, "Morty, are you getting sick?" Hearing mom Morty lifts his head, clearly exhausted,

and wipes food from his face. "I told you not to practice kissing with the living room pillow. The dog sleeps on it." Mom says, reprimanding morty.

I saw it once. He thought nobody was in the living room, not seeing me taped on the ceiling.

"I wasn't kissing a pillow, mom. I just I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. Maybe my dreams were just too loud or something." Morty says, declining his relationship with the living room's pillow, pft.

"You usually dream about Jessica's tits, I didn't know tits talked, wait, Jerry, you still don't have a job, right?" I asked Jerry. 

"I'm finding one..." Jerry says, feeling useless.

"We'll hear is an idea, talking tits, I bet people will form a 2 mile long line just so they could buy one," I really think this is a good idea.

But before Jerry could answer me, mom said, "That's not an appropriate idea, sweetie. I didn't raise you to be a misogynistic prick." She said while frowning at Jerry's happy face.

All the while, Rick was writing something in a wrinkled paper that he put in his lab coat's pocket.

"Rick, if you steal my idea, I'm going to trap you in a universe full of pirates." I threaten rick knowing he's not below stealing ideas.

"Or maybe he was out all night again with Grandpa Rick." Summer said, trying to get morty in trouble.

Hmm, it's obvious she's jealous of morty, going on cool adventures with Rick.

"What?""Dad?" Mom and Jerry said at the same time while looking at Rick.

"What, so everyone's supposed to sleep every single night now? Do you realize that nighttime makes up half of all time?" Rick asks, trying to make a point.

"Damn it!" Said Jerry frowning, "Jerry!" Beth said and looked at Jerry frowning.

"Beth!" Said Jerry, feeling hurt at his wife's comment.

Well, Jerry is feeling hurt again. What else is new.

"Oh my god, my parents are so loud, I want to die." Said summer.

"You're not allowed to die for now. If you die, I will suffer alone, and we can't have that." I say, looking at summer.

"Mm, there is no God, Summer. You gotta rip that band-aid off now. You'll thank me later." Rick says.

"It depends on what God/entity you are talking about." I say knowing about the higher ups, all the ROBs, my idiot ROB, then there is the one above all and the presence kind of higher being.

"What do you mean what god/entity I'm talking about? I, I'm talking about the God with capital g, so I'll ask again what do you mean "what God/entity"?"

'Oh shit'


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