章 34: Chapter 34
Lysandra spent the next day at Zephyr's house. Getting her friend to let her stay instead of going home to Ismene took some persuading on her part, but Zephyr eventually relented.
"Just for today, though," she said. "Like I said, I'm not totally in favor of giving shelter to fugitives. What if they send out a search party for you?"
"Who cares?" Lysandra muttered, and Zephyr raised an eyebrow at her.
She went out during the day, while Zephyr and her family were at work, and requested another visit with her father. She could have sworn the guard who let her in gave her a suspicious look.
"Father," she said, standing in front of the cell door. As ususl, her father didn't even so much as turn his head.
"Lysandra." His voice sounded emotionless and tired.
"Tell me more."
He sighed. "If you insist," he answered. "What did you hear last?"
"I heard that you worked with some man who was in love with my mother," Lysandra choked out.
"That's right." He pressed his palms together in front of him and studied them. "Morpheus. Corinna. He tried to torture the secrets of Memory Recoding out of her."
"Did she tell him?" Lysandra breathed.
"She did. She was so afraid that something would happen to me or to her if she didn't," he answered. "I forgive her. But I will never forgive myself."
Lysandra's eyes narrowed. "Continue."
"Morpheus didn't tell me that. Not until after he threatened me with her life," he explained. "That was what you must have seen. We were in the front entryway of the house after Morpheus broke in. I pulled a gun on him and tried to shoot him, but instead he shoved Corinna in front of him and used her as a shield."
Lysandra hated that the only memory she had of her mother was of her mother's last moments - of her and that awful Memory Recoder, Morpheus, of her blood on the walls of the Ferry estate.
"Is that why you're here?" Lysandra asked.
Her father grimaced. "Partially."
"What's the other part?"
"Lysandra, I can't tell you that."
"Why not?" she demanded. She shook the door of his cell with one hand, causing the resulting clash of metal to echo throughout the hallway. "I'm not five! I deserve to know what happened!"
"It's not a matter of how old you are," her father told her. "If I were to tell you, it might ruin your memory."
"Bullshit!" Lysandra howled. "I'm tired of everyone telling me what I can and can't remember! You've told me enough up to now, and I'm not insane! Why don't you just get it over with? Is it because you can't ever forgive yourself?" She let the last few words of the sentence taper off mockingly.
"Lysandra, it's all for you," he answered, his voice dipping low into an octave of self-loathing, of pleading. "I've been locked up. I have nothing left to lose but you."
"You say you want to do what's best for me," Lysandra snapped, "but then all you do is try to protect me from the truth. Make up your mind."
In the middle of the night, she got up and left the Winslow family's house, unable to sleep for remembering the torturous conversation.
The sun rose and Lysandra sat in the kitchen, watching it from one of the windows. She hadn't slept for a minute. Memories of recent encounters kept tearing through her head, disrupting her thoughts.
She remembered Cale most of all, remembered Morpheus firing that single shot at him. His sister had said the wound was in his arm, and that he was in the infirmary. She prayed that he would be all right every second she got the chance. She needed him. Without him, she'd be forever lost in a maze of darkness and memory.
Lysandra had begun to consider going to visit the infirmary when she heard footsteps on the stairs, and knew she was trapped.
"Lysandra Anna Ferry!" a voice exclaimed. It belonged to Ismene, of course, whom Lysandra hadn't seen in days. She resisted the urge to run away and hide in a corner and faced the woman.
"Ismene," she stated.
"Where on earth have you been hiding!" Ismene shouted. "You disappeared during the meeting with the Collingwoods, for the sake of Saints! I've been worrying about you for an eternity! I was about to send the Reinforcers out after you!"
"Good call," Lysandra muttered sarcastically.
"Watch your tongue," Ismene snapped. "Do you know how Simon would feel if he was aware you were away from home so often!"
"He wouldn't," Lysandra said. "In fact, I'm fairly sure he is aware that I've been out of the house."
Ismene sucked in a breath, preparing to say something else, but no words came out of her mouth. Her face drained of color, and slowly, her lips pressed together again.
"Don't tell me you've been going to see him."
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