章 181: A Talk With Felicia
The day continued without a hitch. We didn't see any presence of the knight, even at lunch or dinner. She probably had decided to lock herself up in her room.
When we returned to our cabin, I remembered the promise I made in the morning. Hmm, I wonder if she still remembers.
"So, still want me to do it?" I smirked as I sat on the bed.
"Do it?" Felicia furrowed her eyebrows. "Do what, Milord?"
"Oh, you already forget?" My smirk grew wider. "Nevermind then."
"...W-wait! You're talking about this morning, aren't you? A-about the groping…"
"Yep!" I made grabbing motions with my hands, which promptly turned Felicia's face scarlet.
"I… I need to prepare myself first!"
"Prepare yourself?" I chuckled at her surprisingly cute reaction. "You're not a virgin. Surely your breasts have been groped many times before."
"T-that's different! W-when it's you—my head goes all dizzy and I… I…" She trailed off.
I jumped off the bed and walked towards her. With a smile, I grabbed her hands and gathered them together.
"It's fine if you're not ready. In fact, I'm happy, seeing you like this. If I really am going to take you as my wife, I don't want to be the only one being shy and awkward in bed."
"I-I see…" Felicia averted her gaze. "But Milord, I don't think you'd do a bad job, even on our first night. Not with your libido…"
I laughed. "I'm not so sure about that. Groping and ear biting are far different than doing the deed. I feel I'll mess up. Maybe even insert it into the wrong hole."
"D-don't you worry, Milord!" She gripped my hands back. "I'll be there to guide you all the way!"
Heh, that's not very manly, is it, being guided by your female partner at sex?
"Why are you so nervous anyway?" I asked back. "Is it really just because of me?"
She nodded, before smiling grimly, looking down to our linked hands. "I already told you before—how I seduced those two men for my selfish end. I could only do that by stabbing my own soul. I believed that I was dirty and tainted, after being violated by that scum. So what did I have to lose?" Her voice shook. "I suppose I disassociated myself. I did the role I gave myself—that of a seducer. And I was good at it, or they were just disgusting filth who didn't really care about my bad acting as long as they could have my body." She looked back at me. "But you, Milord, you broke those chains I gave to myself. I am now free—free from the burdens of the past. You made me believe I could be a good person—a good woman. Thus, I no longer take that role—that of a seducer, or an evil necromancer. I am now the young and naive Felicia, just an ordinary village girl." She laughed, releasing her hands from mine. "Ah, but I am simply deluding myself. I am too old to pretend I am her. So I don't know who I am now. I suppose I am your servant, Milord, devoted to you until the day I die."
I fell silent. I was right. All these years she had been living a lie, constructing a mask she wore to protect herself.
It's pitiful. No one should live that way. You would only drown in regrets, never being able to fully become your true self. You would grow to hate yourself, just like she did.
And now, with her mask broken, she's clinging to me for guidance. For salvation. To her, I am the only person in the entire world who will take her dirty, rotten self.
For her to be happy, I have to make her love herself again.
Can I really do that? When I don't even love myself?
I took her hands once more, locking my eyes with her.
Here goes nothing.
"Listen to me. I don't want you to devote the rest of your life just for me. The young Felicia—she loved alchemy, didn't she? She dreamed of using it to heal the sick. Why don't you aspire for that dream once more? You have cured plagues before with it. How many people have you saved already, just by doing so?" I put on my best smile.
"...No." She looked away, her expression one of sorrow. "I won't chase an impossible dream. Many still died even with my medicine. My cure did not work perfectly every time. Some people were too far gone to be healed. And others had died before I could even formulate the medicine." She released her hands from mine, clasping them together near her chest. "That's why I delved into necromancy. I could prevent death by conquering it. A beautiful world without plagues and sickness. That was my dream." She chuckled. "I even fancied to open the gate to the afterlife. You know how that ended."
A disaster, I sighed.
A gate to the afterlife. In a fantasy world, such things are not that uncommon. But, usually, you would have to pay a heavy price to cheat death, which is why necromancy gets such a bad rep.
Renee… Alan… it would be nice to see them again… my father and mother of this world…
But even if I could, do I really want to see them? After all the things I did?
...No. Yearning for the past, no matter how sweet, won't change anything. One can only chase after the future, and that's what I'm going to do.
And not just mine. Felicia, Sherry, Marina, Erika — I have to make them have the happiness they deserve.
I shook my head. "That's where you're wrong. No one can save everyone. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't try. That was the lesson taught to me by an old friend."
"An old friend?" She turned around with a curious look.
"Nicole. You remember her, right?"
"Ah, the priestess accompanying that Fiora girl." She smiled wryly. "Don't tell me you took a liking on her too, Milord?"
"Heh, unlike Fiora, she has no interest in me whatsoever." I shrugged with a grin. "Nevertheless, she was there to give me advice, and I admired her for it."
"I see. I'm glad then. I don't want more rivals for your affection," she frankly responded with her own grin.
Suddenly, a lightbulb lit up in my head.
"Well, if you want to win my love that badly, then I'll tell you this secret." I smirked. "I like career women the best. I don't want my wife to just stay at home all day. I want her to go out there and make a name for herself. If you become a famous alchemist whose name enters the annals of history, then I'll be the proudest husband that I can be."
That was a lie, unfortunately, but a white one. I'm too much of a selfish bastard to not want a proper housewife who caters to all my desires. To be welcomed with a loving smile after a hard day's work — that has always been my dream.
"Do you want food? A bath? Or perhaps… me?"
Aah! How great it must feel to be greeted like that!
…
But, I can't tell that to her. She needs to recover — to rediscover who she really is and who she wants to be. This mindset of her is unhealthy and I will be a villain if I encourage it.
And besides, if I really will have two wives, then it's not so bad if one is busy with her work, since there's still the other one.
...
Ha! Look at yourself, Hugo! You think you're good enough to have a harem? You don't even know how to convince Sherry to accept Felicia!
"R-really, Milord?" Felicia's voice brought me back to the real world. "Then, if I were to become a legendary alchemist, would you love me the most? Even more than Sherry?"
Uh oh, it's this question. Should've seen it coming.
"W-why yes! Yes, of course!"
"Oh, thank you!" She threw herself at me. "I promise I won't disappoint you!"
As my face was buried in her cleavage yet again, I could only sigh. I sure hope this won't backfire in the future.
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In the end, she decided not to make me do the groping, saying that she'll hold off on her "reward" after she can go back to being a proper alchemist. She took out her thick and heavy tomes, quickly filling out our small room with it, and resumed her studies. I found out that she would tie her long hair up in a bun whenever she was in her "study mode", which, to be honest, didn't look bad at all on her. In fact, a quiet pride swelled in my chest as I saw her pouring through her books like that. Heh, I might have a thing for studious women after all.
After a few more uneventful days in the ship (we didn't meet the elven knightess again) the captain announced that they would disembark the next morning, and that they should prepare themselves tonight — pack their things and all that. And that's what we did tonight before we went to sleep. Felicia was sitting on the floor with her books while I sat on the bed watching her. I wanted to help but she insisted that she had to do it alone. I get it. As a bookworm myself, I hate it when other people touch my books.
"Finally, Milord, the Demon Continent." Felicia smiled as she sent her books one by one into her Dimensional Storage. "Are you excited? Worried? Ready with your Demon Tongue? Though you can get by using Human Tongue in the human cities, the demons won't take it kindly that you don't use their language."
"Heh, of course I'm ready." I smirked with full confidence. "You've taught me well, after all."
Blushing a little, she replied, "Oh, that was nothing. You were the one who did most of the work. You'd keep reading the book I gave you whenever you could. I admire your diligence, Milord."
"I can say the same to you." I smiled. "When you sit down and read all those heavy and difficult books, your intelligence really shines through."
"A-ah, y-you were staring?" She looked away, her face fully crimson now. "Y-you shouldn't have said that! Now I can't concentrate anymore when you're around!"
This woman… she's in her twenties yet she's still this childishly cute.
I want to tease her.
"As a reward, why don't I give a massage to those melons of yours, hmm?" I made squeezing motions with my hands.
"N-no, not now! These panties are the last clean pair I have!"
…
Eh?
Covering her mouth with both hands, she clarified, "A-ah, ignore that! Ignore what I just said, Milord!"
My smirk immediately grew into a grin.
"Don't tell me that you get wet down there just by a groping?"
"I do… but only when you are the one to do it, Milord…"
...Hold on, I don't think I've ever groped her for real. I only squeezed once or twice when she was asleep, out of (perverted) curiosity. Then how did she—
"Wait, I don't think I've ever groped you before."
"Y-you did… when you got drunk the other day… you fell asleep and did… did things to me…"
...W-what? While I was drunk, I—I molested her?
Thinking about it, I did have an especially pervy wet dream that night, involving Marina out of all people. Wait, don't tell me that I did all I was dreaming of to Felicia in real life?
T-that means I had… I had ra—
Without hesitation, I jumped down the bed and did a dogeza.
"Please forgive me, Felicia! I am truly the scum of the earth for doing that to you! Punish me however you like! Punch me, kick me, do whatever you want with me! I really am a failure as a human and as a man!"
"N-no, it's nothing like you're thinking, Milord! Please! Stop this at once! I don't mind it at all!"
Gingerly, I looked up, finding that she was waving her hands around with a troubled look. "You just groped me, that's all. And that's when I… released…" She averted her eyes. "I liked it, even if I was gravely embarrassed by it at the same time…"
Eh? I fell silent. Slowly, I sat up. "Wait, I didn't… violate you?"
"What?! Violate me?! How can you even think like that?! No no no, you did nothing of the sort!"
"It really was just a grope?"
"Just a grope, that's all!"
"O-oh… oh… thank God…"
I took the deepest sigh I could as I slumped back, wiping the cold sweat off my face.
If I… If I had become a rapist, I don't think I'll ever forgive myself. I'll just jump off this ship and become one with the fishes.
"D-don't worry, Milord. Even if you had, I still wouldn't mind… I… do want to do it with you. I understand though, if you want to make Sherry your first…" A sorrowful yet embarrassed look swept the alchemist's face.
Yeah, groping is one thing but doing the deed… that's a no no. Even if Felicia is to become my wife, Sherry deserves my first. She had been with me for years after all, raised together by Alan and Renee.
Sorry, Felicia. And sorry, little guy down there. You two need to be patient
I stood up and put my hand on Felicia's head. "I promise. I'll do it as much as you want after I did it with Sherry. That's the duty of a husband after all, making sure that his wife is satisfied."
She looked up and whispered with a smile. "I'll hold you up to that."
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The next morning was naturally the busiest morning we had on the ship. Even before the sun had risen, we could hear footsteps going back and forth from above. Still, we didn't leave our room until quite a bit later, maybe about eight in the morning. Wristwatches aren't a thing in this world yet, unfortunately. Not sure about pocket watches though. Never seen any on the many markets I had visited. Maybe some dwarves somewhere had made them in their workshops, but it certainly wasn't a mainstream object.
The deck was full of other passengers wanting to see the incoming land, chatting loudly to themselves to the point that the sound of the seagulls flying above the ship were entirely muffled.
Hmph, seagulls. A sign that we're close to shore indeed.
Not that I need them to know that fact.
Looking at the distance, I could see it clearly — shapes on the horizon signifying that land was approaching. Hard to tell how far it really was though. I wasn't a sailor after all.
"The Demon Continent. I never imagined I would arrive here like this." Felicia, who was standing beside me, spoke to herself.
The Continent teemed with dark Mana, leading to corpses automatically returning back to life as zombies. That's why the humans in this land didn't bury their dead, choosing to exhume them instead. No wonder Felicia was so interested in going here.
I looked around our surroundings, making sure that there was no one nearby that could overhear our conversation, as I knew what I was about to ask was sensitive information.
"You know, I always wondered why you didn't come here immediately to do your research." I glanced at the redheaded woman. "Not only it's safer from the Church, but it seems to be a better environment to have your research in."
"Ah, I never talked about that, have I, Milord?" She smiled. "It's simple. The Demon Lord of Death. I need to be ready to face him first."
"The Demon Lord of Death?" I raised my eyebrows.
"Yes. It is said that he's a powerful lich, a demon race that is capable of necromancy. And he doesn't tolerate any other necromancers, especially human ones. He sees them as thieves, as to him, human necromancy is just a pale imitation of his own," she explained.
"Wait, are you saying that human necromancy is different from demon necromancy?" I asked back.
"Oh yes, very. Liches are capable of necromancy just like birds are capable of flight. It comes to them naturally. Unlike us humans who had to study many long nights just to be one." She smiled wryly. "In fact, the Demon Lord was right. Human necromancers stole his knowledge to be able to become necromancers in the first place."
"...Huh, I never knew that. It's quite similar to the myth of humans learning magic from the elves and spirits, no?"
Marina once told me about it. It's a Magocracy myth, how the early witches and wizards learned their trade from the pointy-eared ones, as they were much more attuned to nature than us humans were. There are even tales of Mira cleverly stealing magic from the elves. Heh, obviously, those tales came from Ilymhyrra's existence, which they hid to make their Founder look better. They would rather have her be a clever trickster than to have a mentor that guides her growth.
The first human mage and the first human necromancer… if I had to guess, they're from the same archaic era a long, long time.
Wait, that means that Demon Lord guy must be really, really old. Well, as a lich, he should be immortal, so there's no problem.
"Of course you didn't." Felicia replied. "It's forbidden knowledge after all. I only learned it from that book. And yes, it is pretty similar to that myth.
"Ah, the book you gave to Ilmyhrra."
I wonder where she is right now. Has she arrived at the Magocracy yet? Would she really fulfill her promise?
Sorry, Miss Grumpy Elf. Even if you keep yours, I'll have to break mine one day. Those mages… they have to be taught a lesson. Not only for what they did to Alan, Renee, and Marina, but for what they did to Felicia as well. If what Felicia said was true, that Vehta guy needs to be punched in the face. Repeatedly. Preferably by Sherry.
I would really not rather fight the millenia-old elf though… Not only she's really, really strong, she's grown on me as well. Even though she protected those sociopathic mages, she's nothing like them herself.
Well, let's just hope that she's nowhere near the place when Marina and I made our return.
A strong wind suddenly blew from the north, interrupting my thoughts, as Felicia's robe was lifted on the slit, revealing the red lace she wore underneath. The mage didn't react until the wind died down, pulling the fabric with her left hand, blushing in the process.
"Ah! Such a strong wind! I do hope there aren't any perverts who peeked at my underwear!" She exclaimed, while looking straight at me with a knowing smile.
Yeah, she knows. And she's pretending to be like those shy heroines in the books I read when the main character accidentally saw their lingerie.
Too bad that role isn't really suited for her. Her shyness is much cuter when it's actually her being shy. This just feels forced. I guess she's too used to acting as her old, flirtatious self.
Still, it was enough to make my flag rise half-mast. What can I say? I just have a weakness to the classics.
And so it was for the next hour or so, as we waited on the deck, my eyes were pretty much locked at her thighs, waiting for the next wind to blow. Hey, if she's offering, I would be an idiot not to take it!
クリエイターの想い 
ForestDweller
ForestDweller Also, just posted a new chapter on my Patreon where Hugo takes a bath together with Felicia. If you're interested, you can check it here. (patreon.com/forestdweller)