章 81: The 800 Faves Thanksgiving Special: Aunts
I don't own blizzard things.
"I swear on my ma's grave-"
"You hated your mother." Dad mumbled out of the side of his mouth as Mom glared at the man 'making an oath'. Uncle Tychus stood on the porch, his hand raised as if swearing on a witness stand as Mom glared at him. A deadly wooden stirring spoon in her hand, covered in cranberry sauce.
Uncle Tychus grunted at being reminded and made a face that said, 'oh yeah', but didn't say the words himself. At the moment he was trying to get back into Mom's good graces, what with blowing up the kitchen the last time he came to Thanksgiving dinner. He took a deep breath through his nostrils and said clear as day.
"I swear on Jimmy's mother's grave. The saint that she was-" Mom and I glanced at Dad for confirmation who nodded a little sheepishly, obviously swearing on my grandmother's grave was acceptable.
"He did like her a lot." He added before uncle Tychus continued.
"-That I will not enter the kitchen, touch any food preparation device, or otherwise move from that there couch, until you call for supper." He said, pointing to the said couch, currently waiting for Dad to return and continue watching football as Uncle Tychus began crossing his heart with his other hand. "So help me god."
"God won't be able to if you fuck this up one more time." He fidgeted slightly at mom's words before turning back to face her. "You don't get up to PISS without my permission is that understood?" Uncle Tychus mumbled something unclear but immediately went rigid as Mom suddenly glared at him. "Don't you FUCKING mess with me today Tychus!" she waved the cranberry spoon admonishingly at his face as he fidgeted, flecking some sauce on him. "I have to deal with TWO massive bombs today I don't need three!"
"…Yes Ma'am." He mumbled nervously as Dad shoved him towards the couch and they both sat down upon it simultaneously.
"Do not push her buttons Findlay." Dad mumbled as the roar of the tv echoed around the house as 'TOUCHDOWN!' was followed quickly by an echoing-'DAMNIT!' they barked together as their opposing team scored.
Mom was a bit on edge, and no amount of me helping her cook in the kitchen was going to help much with that. We have almost finished everything that needed to be finished… but all the guests haven't arrived yet.
Due to some sort of Thanksgiving MIRACLE Mom actually invited Aunt Nova. I know, I was surprised too. She RSVP'd within moments of said request… but then we got another rather awkward invite…
The door rang as I took a breath and went to it, immediately opening the door as a pink-haired woman swooped down and wrapped her arms around me, her European accent echoing around the room. "Hello, Scotty! Did you miss me?"
Uncle Matt hesitantly slipped inside, hanging up a hat and helping her with her bomber jacket leaving her in little more than a tank top showing off her muscled arms, covered in a few scars. For half a second I thought she was the coach and had shrunk…
But Aunt Mira had arrived.
"Guys." Uncle Matt said, unusually calm as he sat in the recliner, close to Dad as he watched the TV. "How are we doing?"
"The Lost Vikings own the field." Uncle Tychus mumbled irritated as Aunt Mira slid into the kitchen as the trio groaned again.
"Sarah! It has been too long." I followed her into the kitchen as she swooped down and kissed Mom's cheek. "Can I help you with anything?"
"Turkey's been dead for a couple of days so. No." Mom's smile didn't quite reach her eyes, but she tried and that's all we could've asked. Aunt Mira found it HILARIOUS. Laughing melodiously as she went to the fridge, took a Queen of Blades beer, and uncapped it with a rather imposing combat knife before drinking half the bottle.
Uncle Matt had tried so very hard to get his wife to go somewhere, ANYWHERE for thanksgiving, but she was apparently against it. And now we were all going to have dinner together… I just hope they're all too tired to do anything once we're done eating. Taking her beer and giving me a wink she returned to the living room to sit on Uncle Matt's lap, watching the game as I continued to help mom for a few more moments until the doorbell rang.
"Okay." I said as Mom took a deep breath. "Deep breaths. You can do this." I said as she nodded slowly.
"Right. I can do this. It's just dinner. I've invited her to dinner before." Not that I can remember but sure. "Okay." Mom added as she basted the turkey and I went to the front door with her.
"Hello!" Nova smiled in her usual white business suit, she immediately hugged Mom, squeezing her tightly as Mom went rigid and her face stretched into an odd smile. "I'm so happy you invited me!" Nova said, grinning at Mom as she held her at arm's length. "And nothing bad had to happen for you to do it! This is great! This is progress!" she practically skipped inside and greeted the rest of the 'family' as I took a frozen mom by the arm and gently led her back inside.
"Hello everyone." She smiled as Dad raised a beer silently as Uncle Tychus grinned 'charmingly' at her. Uncle Matt smiled politely, and Mira waved cheerfully as Mom and I returned to the kitchen to finish cooking.
Finally, the bird was ready, the potatoes were mashed, the cranberry sauce was sauced and the bread rolls were rolled out. Mom armed herself with a large carving knife, and just about everyone took a step away as we surrounded the bird. Uncle Tychus would've taken two if he was allowed to get off the couch.
"Oh Sweetie that doesn't look very sharp…" Aunt Mira stated as she pulled a combat knife from her boot, "Want to try this one?" Uncle Matt grabbed her wrist as she smiled coyly and he carefully took the knife, placing it on the counter.
"I could've sworn I searched you thoroughly." He said calmly as Mom ignored them both and began taking hunks of light and dark meat from the bird.
"You did Matthew darling, but I am resourceful." She purred lovingly, as Uncle Matt rolled his eyes before shoving another beer into her grip to replace the knife as she drank it. A sloshed Aunt Mira was probably as safe as we could get her.
"Can I get off the couch now?" Uncle Tychus shouted from the living room.
"I'm still holding a knife Tychus!" Mom replied casually as she continued to carve the bird.
"…I'll take that as a 'no'." he replied sheepishly, "Jimmy Grab me a beer!"
"Ty-chus!" Mom said warningly as he added meekly.
"…Please?"
Mom handed Dad a bottle and off he went.
So… everyone but me has had a few… and upon everyone's third beer, we actually ate. Laughing, joking, anecdote-ing, essentially… it was just a big family thanksgiving dinner, no bombshells or explosions of any variety, no gigantic fight, and Mom finally let Uncle Tychus go to the bathroom and he couldn't move fast enough…
But a serving later followed by seconds, a majority of us were collapsed on the various seats and couches feeling sick with ourselves, groaning as a few of us loosened our pants to relieve our bulging stomachs…
"I regret everything…" Uncle Tychus moaned, "Great cooking Sarah." He added as Mom, a mixture of drunkenness and fullness dozed slightly on an equally dozing dad's shoulder. Uncle Tychus pushed himself to his feet, wobbling slightly, "Well… thanks for the meal, but I'm off to Orgrimmar… there's a club there that makes great wings and gives good company."
He gave me a wink and I wondered if Ma'Jin was working tonight. Oh well, one less explosion to worry about… he slapped dad's hand with a high five and walked out of the room, winking as Nova who, had three QoBs herself, merely smiled politely as he made himself scarce.
"Wanna come Matt?" he asked but Matt was dozing quietly on the recliner as Aunt Mira playfully swirled a finger in Uncle Matt's dark hair.
"My Matthew will be busy tonight Findley, you have fun."
"I do believe I will." He waved at us and off he went, shutting the door as I got up, and groaned a little before heading towards the kitchen.
"I'll get started on putting things away." I said as Dad winked at me.
"Thanks, kiddo." Wrapping an arm around Mom and both watching the TV quietly.
I had hardly put the food away when a feminine hand rested on my shoulder and slid across my back, resting on my other as Nova stood next to me. "No pretty teachers today?" she whispered as I shrugged.
"Not this time. Olivia has a couple of roommates now, they're having dinner with Brigitte's family. Fareeha's with her mom, Principal Morrison, and God-help-us-all Vice Principal Reyes…" she looked at me oddly.
"Do they really call him that?"
"Guy has a loaded shotgun in his office we'll call him whatever he wants." I noted, shrugged, and added. "So yes. Just me, and the family… and you." I said sighing, putting the knife down and glancing at her before whispering calmly. "Do you want something?"
Her eyes twinkled slightly, and she absently tugged at her business jacket, pulling it open as her breasts became more prominent, stretching her undershirt as she relaxed against the counter, stretching out her stocking legs and heels before stating very calmly. "Dessert"
"Ice Cream's in the fridge. We got Cookies and Cream and Neapolitan. If you don't take all the flavors of Neapolitan, you're a savage."
"…Do you have anything a little more… salty?" she purred, knowing I was playing hard to get, but honestly. I was tired and she was probably going to jump me in my sleep anyway so I might as well enjoy it at this point. Her bright red lips opened and her tongue ran slowly around it, panting slightly.
"…Fine." I noted, "Let me finish." I added, already moving and packing away food to place in the fridge. I glance in the living room as a new game was played on TV; everyone was dozing faintly so I curled my finger at Nova, telling her to follow me.
Silent as a Ghost, Nova followed me as we snuck upstairs, nobody noticed, even as Aunt Mira walked to the downstairs bathroom. We slipped into my room as I sat on the bed, Nova squatting suggestively before me, her skirt riding up her stocking legs to reveal her black underwear as I grabbed her ponytail and pulled her easily to my crotch, already throbbing at my pants as she cooed excitedly.
I yanked at the hem of my pants and out-jumped my erection, wobbling before her eyes as her mouth parted into a grin, "Ah…" she sighed as I easily slipped between her lips. "MMM!" her eyes crossed as she slurped down my shaft, burying her nose into my pubic hairs as she inhaled and sucked loudly. Her tongue lashed beneath my shaft as her hands rested on my legs, "MMn Hmmm!" she slowly slid up my length as I held her platinum blonde ponytail in my hand, my head rolling back as her lips worked magic.
She bobbed up and down slowly before pulling off with a pop, "Ha ha…" she laughed slightly tongue flicking my tip as she panted on my length. She seemed intent on teasing me but I was having none of that. "Mrrugh!" I pulled her back down my length, holding her head tightly in one hand as I guided her up and down, "mmm. Mmm. Gack… mmm…" she hummed around my length as she devoured my cock into her mouth again and again. Her hands slid from her legs and she began to rub herself, her legs spread wide so I got a good view.
Her lower body suddenly rocked back and forth, "MMnghph!!" her eyes rolled as an orgasm surged through her, her tongue shaking on my length in her mouth. "Gugh!!!" I stood up, pushing deep into her throat as I held her head to my crotch, "Urp! Uggh!!" her throat convulsed around my length. I thrust my hips rapidly back and forth, barely leaving her mouth as she shuddered and whimpered. Her bright red lips smeared around my length until it was an unhealthy red color.
"Keep it up, I'm gonna cum." I declared, gazing down at her as she looked up at me, her eyes quivering and twinkling as she noisily slurped. "Shit." I hissed, pulling from her mouth and gripping my bulging, ready-to-fire cock, "Open."
"Ah…" she sighed, tongue hanging out as I shoved my tip between her lips and released. Her eyes closed as steams of hot cum shot into her mouth, splashing against the roof of her mouth and pooling at the back of her throat. I thrust lightly against her tongue as spurt after spurt shot into her mouth, she didn't miss a drop. I ground my spent cock against her tongue as she moaned, gargling my load as it bubbled in her mouth.
I let go of my cock gripping her head and tilting it back as she chuckled, still gargling my load like mouthwash as her tongue slithered around, churning it . "Swallow." I ordered as she obeyed without hesitation, her mouth closing as she gulped, I imagined it sliding down her throat as she opened her mouth again.
"Yummy… AH…" she opened her mouth again, and I immediately took advantage of it, shoving my cock back between her lips as she began sucking again, "Mmn… hmm, mmm…"
I let her suck it back to firmness, pulling from her mouth as she licked my shaft, "Want some more?" I asked with a rather bored smile.
"I want you to fuck your naughty aunt…" she purred.
"Well if you insist." Came a voice that wasn't mine
…I've seen Nova make a lot of looks, I've even seen her caught in the act by Fareeha and Olivia, and seemed completely unconcerned.
However, seeing Mira Han leaning against the door which I was SURE I shut and locked behind me. A completely hilarious, if not unfortunate look, crossed Nova's face.
"Oh Shit!" she hissed, standing up and trying to hide the fact that she was sucking off her 'nephew' behind her. Not realizing that her skirt was still hiked up and her panties were clearly soaked with arousal and my dick was hanging out, hard and ready.
"Well well…" Purred Aunt Mira in a rather snakelike hiss, shutting the door as her combat boots echoed on my floor. "I knew you were very Naughty, Nova but Scottie? Tsk-Tsk…" she wagged a finger at us, "Very Naughty." She purred in her indistinguishable accent.
"This… isn't what it looks like." Nova said in a cliché sort of voice. I glared at her. It's OBVIOUSLY what it looks like.
"Hmph." Aunt Mira replied, glancing at my length as it throb. "Ooh… Scottie that looks uncomfortable…" she approached me, her face a little red as she licked her lips, her heterochromia eyes twinkling. "Such a manly unit you have…"
…I saw it coming but it was still surprising…
Her jeans hit the floor as Nova seemed at loss for words, Aunt Mira stood in hot pink thong underwear before that too hit the floor. She kicked up her jeans and removed a leather wallet, opening it and showing me Uncle Matt's ID before she pulled a condom packet from it and tossed the wallet over her shoulder.
"Wait wait Whoa…" I said, straightening up before she pushed me back with her foot, that she had slipped out of her boots. She was essentially naked except for her tank top. She then tore open the condom and slipped it easily over my length. It was a little tight.
"Oh… You're bigger than Matthew!" she said as she told me something I didn't want to know.
"Wait, what about uncle matt!" I said as she already began to straddle me, pulling my length to her pussy as she purred.
"We have an understanding…" Aunt Mira cooed, before-"Ah!" she sat on my lap and I sat up, hissing at her tightness as she wrapped her arms around me. "As long as protection is used. We're allowed a little leeway…" she licked her lips, grinding her hips on me. "…But I won't tell if you don't." then before I could reply she was bouncing on my lap.
"Ah! Hah! Ooh! That's! Surprising!!" she purred, "Ah!!" She gasped going faster and faster as my hand instinctively rent to her ass, squeezing her muscular cheeks as her legs lifted and dropped her onto me, Nova watching in fascination. "MMN! Naughty boy!" she cooed, pulling my face between her breasts as she rolled and swiveled her hips on my lap like a hula dancer. "OOoh!" she fidgeted, squeezing me tightly as her pussy spasmed around me. "Ooooh…." She cooed, "That's good." She trembled as she came, stopping her bounce as she sat on my lap.
Well… in for a penny.
My hands pulled away and smacked onto her ass, "Oh!" she gasped, clenching as I gripped her cheeks and stood up, lifting her with me as I stepped across the floor to press her against the wall. "Oh." She grinned as I pulled out, and slammed back in, "Yes! Oh! Scottie!" she purred as the wall rattled from our blows. She pulled her hands away, pushing against the wall as she wormed against it, rolling her body on my thrusting hips as she seemed to dance like a snake, "Get deep into me Scottie. OOoh!" My hips sped up, pumping hard against her as she shuddered, "Yes…"
Pinning my hips to her and enjoying the spasming pussy I pulled my hands from her ass and lifted her legs onto my shoulders, her feet never touching the ground as I began again, pumping against and deep into her folded body.
"Ooh! Ooh!" she moaned, "Scottie like being on top…" she grinned, her eyes quivering as- "O-oohh!!" her pussy clenched and quivered around me and I lost it. pushing into her as my load rushed out and filled the balloon. "Hahaha…" she laughed, her legs rolling off my shoulders as she cooed, "That was good…"
I pulled out of her as she lied against the wall, splaying her legs as she began to rub her crotch, shuddering a little as she leaked onto the floor. The condom slowly slid off my length, a big round ball of white on the end as I grabbed and pulled it off. I was about to tie it when.
"Hey. No fair paying attention to one Aunt…" Nova, pressed against the wall next to Aunt Mira l, her skirt hiked as she wiggled her ass towards me, licking her lips.
I moved behind her, my other hand grabbing her underwear and pulling it down just enough for access to her dripping womanhood as my hand smacked loudly onto her smooth ass cheeks. "Ooh!" she whimpered, as I reached up with the same hand, grabbing her hair and yanking her head back as she gasped, I put the open end of the condom on her lips, and she clamped down around it before I grabbed the filled end and tilted it up.
My load slid down into her mouth as the bag emptied. My other hand rubbed her slick pussy as she wiggled her ass. Her throat gulped and my load slowly slid down it. I shoved the empty condom, between her cleavage as Aunt Mira purred, "Naughty."
I moved behind Nova, gripping her ass and immediately slamming into her, raw. "Ah ha… yes!" she bent farther forward as I pulled her ass away from the wall, her hands pressed to the wall, pushing herself back as I began to thrust. "Ah! Ah! Harder!"
SMACK! My hand left a red handprint on her ass as she yelped delightedly.
"Deeper!"
SMACK! I struck her other cheek as she wiggled, our hips echoing around my room as I slapped against her bouncing ass. "Oh fuck!" she trembled slightly, I reached out and grabbed her ponytail, her head yanked back and her back arched as I pulled. "Ah! AHH! Hwooo!" her body wormed against my thrusting hips as her legs quivered, bending slightly as they lost strength. I wrapped my other arm around her waist holding her up.
"Hah! Hah! Fuck me… Like… you own… ME!!" her heels danced on the floor, lifting up slightly as I pushed into her, "AH! I'm gonna! I'm gonna!" I pushed into her hard as she pushed flush against the wall, I held her there on my cock as her body quivered, her head yanked back by her hair as she declared her orgasm to the ceiling. "Fucking CUM!!" she hissed, clawing the wall with her hand and scraping the floor with the toes of her feet.
Silently I unleashed into her. Filling her body as Aunt Mira vigorously thrust into her pussy with her fingers, shuddering wildly as she came, her eyes closed as she smiled before giving a rather blunt. "Woo." Then stood up from the wall, already going for her pants and Uncle Matt's wallet. I watched her dress as I continued to pin Nova to the wall. Her gasping aroused panting slowly calmed down.
"MMMn that was very fun Scottie. Maybe next time I'll bring more rubbers… but who knows Maybe Matthew will be up for a little fun tonight…" and completely ignoring the fact that her nephew gave her an orgasm she casually strutted out of the room.
"I… I better go soon… too…" Moaned Nova as I immediately removed myself from her, "Ah! Shit…" she hissed, quivering as I slid her underwear back up, sealing in my load as she flinched. "Fuck I'm so STUFFED." She laughed as I smacked her ass, "Ah!" I pulled her skirt down and went for my pants as she left without saying goodbye.
I stepped out of my room to find her giving a dazed Mom a hug, "Thank you for inviting me." She said, "I hope to see you soon?" she said as Mom sighed.
"…It might be the five beers talking… but sure." Mom rolled her eyes and looked at an amused Dad warningly as Nova winked and blew me a kiss, waving goodbye as she stepped out of the room.
They dropped back onto the couch as I went and retrieved my phone. "Night guys." I said as they waved to me. I stepped back into my room as my phone buzzed. Face chat? Who's calling me?
I answered it.
"Scott!" Uncle Tychus cheered as a bunch of pretty strippers of various races danced in the background, and the foreground. Ma'Jin's big bubble blue booty twerked next to Uncle Tychus, and big Tauren female with breasts bigger than a man's head bounced them in her hands on the other side of him. Neither of their faces could be seen. Uncle Tychus grinned, "Scott! You should come down here!" he laughed, a pitcher of something in his hands as they partied it up. "You're missing out!" he then buried his face between the Tauren's breasts as she giggled sweetly, slapping them against his face as he motorboated.
However his phone was yanked from his grip, and a familiar face appeared, and a familiar helmet.
Olivia and Ms. Steel Maiden stared into the phone as in the background Hana was dancing on a table, well dressed in jeans and a tank top, and with a pretty night elf stripper, they both looked like they had a few but at least they were being well paid by other lonely thanksgiving patrons.
"Don't." Olivia and Brigitte said together as Olivia grinned, blew me a kiss and purred. "Happy thanksgiving Papi." And Brigitte scampered off to get Hana off the stage, but she seemed reluctant to do so and fought pretty hard before she succumbed to Brigitte's raw muscle…
Then some asshole dwarf smacked Brigitte's ass. She was wearing her Ms. Steel Maiden helmet, I can only assume to hide her identity, but she was wearing regular clothes. The dwarf barely managed to get out a-
"Hey there sexy how bout a dan-" before a heavy right cross broke his nose and sent him spiraling over Olivia's shoulder to an echoing crash as some girls screamed.
"Fucking bitch!"
"Asshole!!" someone else yelled as Olivia seemed to be moving now.
"That's no way to treat a LADY!" Uncle Tychus roared as fighting erupted.
"Hmmm…" Olivia frowned thoughtfully, sitting in a corner booth with a rather terrified-looking Draenei stripper, ducking occasionally as the brawl seemed to get out of control. "…Yeah. I mean it this time. Don't come Scott." She blew me a kiss, "See you on Monday." She cheered as if there wasn't a bar brawl going on. Then suddenly she threw a right hook at a nearby guy shouting "Hands off!" and the phone went off.
…I don't know if that was a bullet dodged or a good time missed?... Oh well…
I collapsed onto my bed, and in preparation for the rest of my weekend, went to sleep. Ignoring the smell of ladies around my room… I was going to have to clean that up.
End of chapter.
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