In Konoha, Tsunade picked up a bottle of sake and started chugging. Her cheeks were slightly flushed, her gaze a bit hazy, clearly showing that she had already had quite a bit to drink. The table in front of her was littered with empty bottles.
"Jiraiya, drink up! You actually dared to call me a crazy old lady?" she grumbled.
Looking at the empty bottles scattered around, Jiraiya felt like crying.
"Sis! Can't I just call you 'Sis'? Please spare me this one time—I swear I won't do it again."
Jiraiya had drunk quite a bit as well, but he didn't dare get drunk. He was terrified of Tsunade hitting him.
In fact, he wasn't even sure why Tsunade had suddenly dragged him out for drinks, or why she was making him pay for it. If it was just the cost of the drinks, that wouldn't have been a problem. After all, Jiraiya's personal funds were still quite plentiful.
But after two bottles of sake, Tsunade had started snapping at him, and now Jiraiya was beyond nervous.
What if Tsunade decided to beat him up?
"Where the hell is Orochimaru when you need him? I invited him, didn't I? Why didn't he come? Is doing research really that fun?"
Jiraiya cursed Orochimaru in his head. "If you had come, Tsunade wouldn't be tormenting me like this!"
"Hey, are you gonna drink or not?" Tsunade shot him a deadly glare.
"I'm drinking! I'm drinking, okay?!" Jiraiya replied, practically in tears.
There was no one to complain to, so he figured he might as well keep drinking. He could only hope that Tsunade just needed to blow off some steam and that this wouldn't end with him getting punched.
As they were drinking, a frog suddenly appeared, hopping onto the table. It opened its mouth and spat out two scrolls before hopping away.
"Is this from Minato?" Jiraiya quickly put down his drink and grabbed the scrolls, hastily opening one.
Boom!
A corpse suddenly dropped onto the table, sending dishes and sauce flying everywhere, splattering all over the place. Tsunade, sitting across from him, froze for a moment. Then, she looked down at her clothes, now soaked in all sorts of food and drink.
"..."
What the hell did I just do? I'm dead! Tsunade's gonna kill me!
Is there still time to run?
Jiraiya felt cold sweat run down his back. Minato, you're killing me here! Why did you send back a corpse? Couldn't it have been something else? Now I'm in big trouble!
Jiraiya hadn't thought much of it when opening the scroll. He had assumed there was something important sealed inside, but no—out came the body of none other than Fuguki Suikazan.
"Ahhh!!" The sudden appearance of a corpse on the table caused an uproar among the other customers in the restaurant. Some of the more timid girls screamed and ran out, with the rest of the patrons quickly following. The entire place was in chaos.
"Damn it…" Tsunade gritted her teeth, her anger building as she stared at the mess all over her clothes.
This was my favorite outfit, and now it's ruined!
Jiraiya gulped nervously and quickly spoke up, "Tsunade, wait! Don't get mad! That's a Mist Village ninja! Minato's squad must've fought with the enemy, which is why the body was sealed and sent here through a summon."
"Doesn't this guy look familiar to you?"
His priority was to calm Tsunade down before she got violent. If not, he'd be dead for sure.
Why does my back feel cold…?
Jiraiya glanced behind him and saw the restaurant owner standing there, holding a kitchen knife, his face dark as night.
Because of Jiraiya's recklessness, all the diners had run out in a panic. Many hadn't even paid their bills, leaving the restaurant owner understandably furious.
Even if you're an important figure in the village, you can't just ruin someone's business like this!
"I'll pay for everything!" Jiraiya quickly apologized, his face flushed with embarrassment. He sealed the corpse back into the scroll as fast as he could, threw a handful of money on the table, and bolted out the door.
"Tsunade, let's go find the old man!"
Seeing the pile of cash left on the table, the restaurant owner's expression softened a little. Fine, I'll let it slide this time, for the sake of the money.
"Whew, that was close…"
After running quite a distance, Jiraiya glanced back and, seeing that Tsunade hadn't followed, sighed in relief before making his way toward the Hokage's office.
Bang!
The door to the Hokage's office swung open with a loud crash, making the Third Hokage's hand tremble as his pen scratched across the paper. At first, he thought it was Tsunade, but when he looked up, he realized it was Jiraiya.
"Since when did you pick up Tsunade's bad habits?" the Hokage grumbled.
Before the Hokage could say anything else, Jiraiya threw the two scrolls onto his desk, opened the window, and leaped out.
"Old man, Minato sent these back. There's a Mist Village ninja's body inside, one of the Seven Ninja Swordsmen, I think. You'll probably get a lot of valuable intel from him."
"I'll leave you to handle it! I've got something urgent to take care of and need to leave the village for a bit."
"..."
Jiraiya didn't linger for a moment longer. He was already out of the village before Tsunade could come after him. He figured if he stayed away for a while, by the time he came back, Tsunade's anger would have cooled off, and he'd be safe again.
"Where's that bastard Jiraiya?!" Tsunade stormed into the Hokage's office not long after, her face red and her clothes stained with alcohol and food. The Third Hokage could only sigh in exasperation.
"Tsunade, you're the head of the Logistics Division. This is work time—at least wait until after hours to drink."
"Jiraiya already left the village. Now come help me handle this scroll."
"Lucky for him!" Tsunade muttered, still fuming.
This had been one of her favorite outfits, and now Jiraiya had ruined it. Didn't he know how hard it was to clean clothes?
The Third Hokage unsealed the scroll and released both the body and the stolen goods inside.
"This man should be Fuguki Suikazan, one of the Seven Ninja Swordsmen of the Mist and the wielder of Samehada," the Hokage said, glancing at the goods.
"Why has Mist Village been attacking Fire Country's merchant ships so frequently?"
"Whatever the reason, this is a direct provocation. We need to send a formal inquiry to Mist Village about this."
Tsunade didn't care about Mist Village's reasons for targeting Fire Country's ships and trade routes. All she knew was that Mist Village was provoking Konoha.
"You're right," the Third Hokage agreed. "Summon the Intelligence Division. Have the Yamanaka Clan extract whatever secrets they can from the body."
Even though Fuguki Suikazan was dead, it didn't matter. As long as the body was intact, there were plenty of ways to dig out its secrets.
And Konoha needed more information about Mist Village. This corpse had arrived at the perfect time. Given that Fuguki was one of the Seven Ninja Swordsmen, his knowledge of Mist Village would be vast.
"Those three kids really did an outstanding job."
"By the way, the man's dead, but where's Samehada?"
Fuguki had been killed, so his weapon should have been taken too, but the sealed scroll contained no trace of Samehada.
"I don't know," Tsunade replied with a dismissive wave, her drunkenness clearly affecting her.
"They probably kept it. It's just a weapon—consider it their spoils of war. Anyway, old man, you deal with this. I'm going home to sleep. Let me know if anything important comes up."
Working while drunk? Yeah, that wasn't going to happen.
During peacetime, there wasn't much for the Logistics Division to do, which was why Tsunade felt free to sneak out and drink.
"..."
The corpse was soon delivered to the Intelligence Division, but what surprised the Hokage was that Danzo showed up shortly after, requesting to speak with him.
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<One Piece: The Strongest Female Pirate Crews.>
<Ninja World: I Have a Life Simulator>
<One Piece: Starting by Refusing Shanks>
<Starting from One Piece: Multiverse Simulation>
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