章 37: Missing Grandpa!

|Innaya|

I lied down after I placed the empty glass on the table. Setting the cushion behind my head, I adjusted myself comfortably on the sofa with my legs stretched out.

I went through my gallery, looking for the picture of Grandpa and mine. It was a random click by Mom when we were lazing in evening, with my head on Grandpa's lap and Grandpa caressing my hair softly. I stared at it for several seconds.

"Grandpa, you know it's been almost two months of me being married to your good boy." I chuckled to myself recalling how Grandpa mentioned him as a good boy in his letter.

"Though I am not sure how easily so much time went. It just feels like yesterday. He takes good care of me. Sometimes he reminds me of you in terms of his understanding, his concern, and most importantly his patience." I sighed going in memory lanes, remembering how beautifully Eshan had handled everything, right from the first time we met in my bedroom.

I wiped the corner of my eye before I smiled. I miss you, Grandpa, deeply.

(Flashback)

I hid my face deeper in pillows as silent tears rolled down my eyes. I was going through photo gallery but after one point, the void of Grandpa became prominent and I couldn't help but cry at my loss.

The bed dipped beside me and I felt Eshan caressing the back of my head. I did not want to explain to him anything and hence, I remained silent. I thought he would leave, assuming I was sleeping but he didn't.

"Sweetheart, sometimes hiding your pain would only result in hurting you more... I know you miss Grandpa and trust me, we all do... I know your pain is more and I could never understand the depth of it, but sweetheart, you think Grandpa would be happy seeing you this way?" Eshan whispered softly after a while and I just clutched pillow tighter in my fist.

Eshan moved on the bed and wrapped his arms around me before pulling me into his arms. I still did not face him; instead, I hid my face in his neck. His fingers reached my scalp, paving their path through the dense mass of my hair. His other hand rubbed my back in a soothing motion.

He held me silently, giving his assurance and strength wordlessly. He whispered after the gap of few minutes, "I will tell you a story. Once a boy, must be sixteen years old, somehow got involved in wrong things. He did not know how to come out of it or with whom to share it. He was lost, without a single way out of that maze. He thought it was the end, he prayed to God to show him the path, to show him the light..." his voice trailed off.

Somehow, I realized he was talking about Grandpa and himself. The pain in his voice was evident, clearly. A single tear rolled down my closed left eye on his skin and I felt him inhale sharply. He did not say anything, just kept on holding me. I could feel how his body shivered for slightest bit.

"There must be someone above listening to that boy as he met his angel then. Somehow, that angel helped him to overcome his problems and after that, there was no looking back. His angel became his everything. Somehow, he got his godfather... Godfather who changed his life for better. Whatever that boy became, learned, all because of that Godfather. However, one day, he left that boy for... forever." Eshan's voice dropped lower, almost barely above a whisper but with my face being so close to his, I heard him.

Eshan's hand stilled on my back as he started, "That boy used to miss his godfather very much and used to get sad at every memory of him... One day, he met his godfather in his dream but his godfather was very sad. That boy asked the reason behind his sadness. His godfather replied, that every time the boy cries or feel depressed because of remembering him, it hurts him thousand times more. Therefore, if he wants his godfather to feel happy, he should be happy himself while remembering all the happy memories they had together."

Eshan's words even though were about his own self but I got the message he wanted to deliver. I pondered over his words, it was not something new, but somehow it felt so. His connection with Grandpa felt new.

Was I hurting Grandpa with being sad, depressed? I questioned to myself.

"Are you alright, sweetheart?" Eshan asked as his hands resumed their work.

"I don't know," I mumbled as I lifted my face from his neck.

He wiped my face before he held me near his heart. "Shh... don't cry Innaya," Eshan requested as he patted my head.

I couldn't help but vent my emotions in the safety of his arms.

"After... after that woman... it hurt me so much... I was losing myself... I used to sit idle for hours... like there was nothing remaining... Grandpa pulled me out of that dark hole... He was my best friend... He made me what I am today... he... I miss him... I miss him..." I hiccuped and let my emotions take over, explaining part of my past.

For some odd reasons, I couldn't help but snuggle more into him. It was as if he was becoming a solace for my restless soul, where I wanted to pour everything to him.

*(Flashback ends)

The door opening brought me out of my memory lane of last week when Eshan had kept a new perspective in front of me. I glanced briefly at the clock, that read eight-thirty in the evening. I stood up adjusting the crumpled Sari before I looked up, only to gasp in a shock.