Chapter forty six: Best served cold.
"Hell yeah!" – talks.
'Art is a blast' – thoughts.
"Know your role!" – Yamato/Rebellion.
"Katsu!" – demonic/jutsu.
...
With Hanabi…
"Wow, how many." Hanabi exclaimed, observing people around her. "I feel like a fucking celebrity in this village."
Suddenly a strong current of wind washed over her and out of it…
"You!" Temari shouted with her fan ready for battle. "Tell me where Naruto is!"
"Naruto?" Hanabi smirked. "Oh, he's around. Actually I was about to go look for him…"
Temari scowled in anger. "You won't be going anywhere!"
"Why not?"
Instead of response Temari swung her fan. "Dai Kamaitachi no jutsu!"
"Hn." Hanabi watched in amusement how Temari's jutsu approached her. 'Time to test my powers.' She concentrated and everything became slow again. 'How fascinating!' Hanabi thought, slowly walking to the side.
However minor Order members who were around didn't have such ability. So it's only naturally that they received the hit instead of Hanabi.
"AAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Several of them screamed as they were sliced to pieces.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk. Didn't your mother tell you that wasting your men is a bad thing?" Hanabi mocked.
"Shut up! Everyone, attack her!"
"Hai!" All soldiers rushed into combat.
"Ooh! Wanna dance?" Hanabi spotted one of them jumping at her and kicked him in the throat with her heel, breaking his neck instantly.
"Die!" Another lashed out at her with an axe from behind.
Noticing that, Hanabi outstretched her hand backwards. "Raiton: Byakurai!"
Nothing.
"Huh?" The girl asked in confusion, pausing the time again. "Why isn't it working?"
"You don't have yoki, so we'll change it for you…" Naruto's voice echoed in her head.
"Ah, of course!" Hanabi exclaimed. "I have yoki now, so… how did Naruto-sama say it? Ha-Hadou #4 Byakurai!"
SLASH.
A beam of white light instantly pierced Suna soldier's chest.
"Woohoo!" Hanabi exclaimed happily. "You'll have to do better than that, bitches!"
With Kurenai…
SLASH.
"AAAAH!" Another Order member screamed as he was clearly cut in half by Kurenai's sword.
"Damn you're all weak." The red eyed woman stated, stabbing some woman in the chest. "Why are you weak?"
SLASH.
"Because you lack…"
SLASH.
"Fashion sense."
SLASH.
"I mean really." Kurenai relaxed, stabbing Alastor into the ground and leaning on it with her elbow. "Who wears white in this time of the year? It's hideous! I mean look at you and look at me! See the difference?"
Indeed, after becoming a demon Kurenai thought that her previous attire won't cut it anymore. So now instead of her dress she wore a very short black skirt with just as short black top to match it.
"Sure, I like what I see."
Kurenai's eyebrows shot up. "Who said that?"
"Down here…"
The woman looked down. "Huh? I can't see anyone."
"No, you're looking straight at me. I'm under your elbow."
Kurenai's eyes widened. "A-Alastor?"
"Yup! The one and only!"
"Does that mean that I have my own talking sword?"
"Uhh… yeah?"
"Alright! Now I can…" Kurenai began excitedly, but just as she picked her sword, several shinobi appeared around her in a puff of smoke and stabbed her with whatever weapons they had.
"Ouch!" The red eyed woman exclaimed. "Do you guys have any idea how much it hurts?"
"S-She is not dying!" Someone exclaimed in fear.
"Of course not! You on the other hand are pretty much dead." Kurenai said and every shinobi's world turned red and black. "Welcome to the Tsukiyomi world, guys! In this world…"
Suddenly…
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" One ninja screamed and stabbed himself in the throat with a kunai.
"You monster!" Another one screamed. "What did you do to him?"
Kurenai sweatdropped. "Nothing actually, that was not my doing. I guess he just simply killed himself out of fear…"
"No, he couldn't…"
"Save it, he did the right thing." Kurenai interrupted. "Because unlike him your death won't be so quick."
And just as she said that, the darkness cleared and Naruto copies started to appear.
"For the next forty eight hours you are going to fight against these odds. Have fun!" She said and disappeared.
"Dammit, what are we going to do?" One of the Order members asked.
"I don't know…" The other one replied. "But if I'm going down, I sure as hell am not going to do this without a fight! Let's show this freak what we've got!"
"YEAH!"
Not too far away Kurenai leaned on the wall with amused smirk on her face. "It sure is easy… to use one's fear and despair against him." She stated, watching how her victims rushed to attack their own comrades. "Now I understand Naruto-kun, fucking up people's minds is fun!"
"Using illusions to make your enemies attack each other… I like you!" Alastor stated. "Besides you have a very nice ass!"
"Thanks, and you are…"
"You really have fallen… Kurenai."
"Oh?" The red eyed woman turned around slowly. "Fancy seeing you here… Anko."
With Lady…
"You fucking bitch!" Misako yelled, blocking Lady's way.
"Ah, so you've survived… a shame." Lady replied with a smirk. "And here I thought you were blown to bits…"
"It'll take much, much more than that to end my life!" Misako exclaimed, drawing her sword.
Lady's smile fell. "Your life?" She readied her bazooka. "You have no life! You lost it when you became a demon!"
"And I would gladly do it again!" With that Misako rushed forward at inhuman speed and brought her blade down, trying to cut Lady in two.
"Gah!" Lady barely had the time to place her bazooka in front of her, blocking the strike. But its power was so big that she was sent flying backwards from the impact.
"See that, little girl?" Misako mocked. "That is the power of a demon! The future lies with us; we will bring this world into a new age!"
"Hmhmhm…" Lady chuckled, getting up slowly. "All I see is a whiny slut." She brought up two guns. "A slut who is about to get fucked for real!" With that she fired several times, but Misako dodged each.
"Stay still, bitch!"
"You wish!" Misako replied, blurring out of view.
"Wha…?"
SLASH.
"AHH!" Lady howled in pain as her back was sliced open.
"Hahaha…" Misako laughed, observing her bloodied sword. "Not so tough in close combat, are you? Time to die, little bitch!" She brought her sword up once more, but…
"Ninpo: Choujou Giga!"
"What?" Misako asked in confusion just before she was knocked over by several ink birds.
"S-Sai?" Lady spoke in disbelief.
"Hey." The ink user replied with a smile.
"You damn traitor!" Misako shouted getting up.
"Tell me…" Sai spoke again, ignoring Misako's outburst. "Why did you join Naruto? I wish to understand."
Lady took a deep breath. "I did it because he is the enemy of the Order, which makes him the enemy of my enemy.
"Does that mean that he is your friend?"
"N-No. Just an ally."
"Do you understand that unlike you many people trust the Order? That means they will stand up against you…"
"The Order wants to make demons out of them. I'd better see them die!"
"I see…" Sai turned to Misako. "I'm sorry, but I cannot allow you to kill her."
"Tch. Then you will die with her!" Misako shouted, charging again.
"Quick, get on!" Sai said, creating an ink bird and jumping on top of it.
Without thinking much Lady did just that.
"Hey! Get back here!" Misako tried to throw a knife at them, but the bird was just too high for her reach. "You're not getting away." She said quietly, bringing up a radio. "Start the counter attack now!"
"Huff… Huff…" Lady tried to catch her breath. "Thanks for the rescue… guh."
"You're wounded." Sai replied. "Let me take care of it…"
"That would be…" Lady's eyes widened. "Look out!"
Sai turned around to see a flying armored knight charging at them.
"Hold on!"
"What's going on?" Lady asked.
"They're starting the counter attack!" Sai explained. "All forces are returning."
"Damn, that's not good." Lady concluded. "Land us somewhere."
Sai simply nodded and ordered the bird to descend on some roof.
"How are you feeling?"
"Been better… ah dammit!"
"Actually…" They heard another voice. "You've never looked better!"
Lady gasped. "How did you get here so fast?"
Misako smirked. "Being a demon has its perks."
"Tch…" Lady tried to stand up but failed.
"Relax, I got it." Sai said, standing up. "I do not enjoy fighting a woman, but I guess it can't be helped."
Misako's smirk widened. "Oh, it can…"
The ink user felt air shift and quickly jumped to the side, escaping another flying knight's attack.
"Damn, there is so many of them…" Sai took out another scroll. "Choujou Giga!"
"That won't help you!" Misako rushed forward, bringing her sword down on ink user's head.
"Maybe not…" Sai replied, dodging the strike and taking out his blade. "But at least it will be enough to distract them!" He added, going on the offense.
'Why…?' Lady thought, seeing their clash. 'Why are you trying to protect me?'
CLANG.
Two swords collided against each other and Misako smirked.
"You have no chance to win with that sword of yours! Give up and I will kill you quickly."
"I was not going to defeat you with my sword."
"Huh?" Misako raised an eyebrow just before…
"Chidori!" Sai slammed his free left hand right in Misako's chest.
"Gah!" The girl gasped in pain and fell on her knees.
"Huff… Huff…" Sai panted heavily. "Leave and I will not…"
SLASH.
"AH!"
"Sai!" Lady screamed in shock as Sai was suddenly stabbed in the back by a sword.
"Thanks for coming, Credo." Misako said.
"How could I not." The swordsman replied, twisting his blade several times.
"G-Gh…" Sai was now coughing blood repeatedly.
"You bastard!" Lady screamed, running at Credo, overcoming her pain, and wrapping her arms around his neck.
"Hmhmhm." Credo chuckled. "What are you trying to do, stupid girl?"
Lady looked at Sai apologetically. "I'm sorry…"
He only smiled at her sadly and nodded.
"What is…?"
CLICK.
Lady pressed a button on her bracelet and…
'I leave the rest to you… Naruto…'
BLAST!
A huge explosion completely obliterated all three of them.
"CREDO!" Misako shouted in rage. "No! NO!" She stood up sharply, only to fall on her knees again. "How could this happen? How…" She suddenly stopped when she noticed that special someone. "YOU! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"
With Naruto… (Starting song: "Light it up" by Rev Theory)
"U-Uz-zumak-ki N-Narut-to…" An ANBU squad leader stuttered.
"Yeah? What is it?" Naruto asked and drank from his can again.
"Y…" The man gulped. "You are under arrest. Surrender yourself and…"
SLASH.
"Nah." Naruto replied, sheathing his blade. "Where do they get these morons?"
"Uzumaki Naruto!" Another squad landed in front of him. "You…!"
SLASH.
"Oh, how I missed this! The wonderful feeling of blood on me!" Yamato commented. "Kill some more!"
Naruto shrugged and threw a fireball at a nearby building, completely destroying it.
"No! I meant with me, you moron!"
Naruto rolled his eyes. "Well, I have a better proposition. How about you know your damn role and…"
"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!"
"Wha…?" Naruto turned around and drew his sword instantly. "Ahh! Just the person I wanted to see! Did you miss me, Misako-chan? And… let me be the first to bring this news to your ROODY POO CANDY ASS! You really look like shit, you know…"
"Shut up!" The girl pushed him away. She indeed got through two explosions recently, so her body was burnt in several places and her clothes were… not in their best shape. "This is your fault that he's dead!" She shouted, attacking him again.
"Who's dead?" Naruto asked in amusement, blocking and dodging her strikes almost effortlessly.
"Credo!"
Naruto paused. "Right I am so, so sorry about that… Who the fuck is Credo?"
"DIE!" Misako screamed instead of answering and swung her sword at Naruto again.
"Hn." Naruto simply dodged and did an upward slash with his own sword. "Huh?" He asked in confusion.
Why? Well maybe because Misako parried his blade not with the help of her own sword, but simply with her right arm.
"Tch!" The girl gritted her teeth in anger and tore her right sleeve, revealing a shining blue arm under it.
"Oh?" Naruto exclaimed with a smirk, sheathing his sword. "Now that's a nice trick. Who taught you that?"
"No one!" Misako shouted. "I am the only one with this ability!" She then rushed at him again, throwing a punch at his head.
"Hmhmhm… What amusing girl you are." Naruto replied, summoning his gauntlet in his left hand and catching Misako's fist effortlessly.
"I-Impossible!" The girl yelled. "You cannot have…!"
SLAP.
She was suddenly interrupted when Naruto backhanded her across her face with his free hand.
"Cough… cough… Naruto, you bastard!"
Said demon's eyes narrowed. "Tell me why."
"Because it's your nature!"
"I was not asking that…"
"Huh?" She looked at him in confusion.
"I want to know the real reason why you turned on me."
"I told you I…"
"I said the real reason." Naruto interrupted.
Misako closed her mouth and stood up shakily. "You want to know why I turned on you? Fine! I was never your friend; I was working for the order from the very beginning!"
Naruto's eyes widened. He wasn't that shocked in a long time. "Then your death…"
"Exactly, it was staged." Misako stated with an evil grin. "So the truth is I was never your friend. It was a mission, from the beginning right to the very end. And as you said it yourself, I have never betrayed you because you never had my loyalty to begin with!" She said and extended her arm his way. "Die, Naruto!"
The man in question watched unmoving how a large spiritual hand made its way towards him. And when it was inches away he simply summoned his sword again and…
"Rapid Slash!"
"Guah!" Misako fell on her knees as she was cut all over her body.
"I can't believe my first friend is so weak." Naruto stated walking closer and tearing a skull-like necklace from her chest. "That belongs to me."
"Fuck you!" Misako spat some blood at him. "Wait until our Savior is here! He will deal with your sorry ass!"
"Sure he will!" Naruto stated, smiling happily. "But I'm afraid you won't be around to see it."
Misako looked at him in fear. "Are you going to kill me?"
The Overlord picked up her sword. "Kill you? Me? Nah, I won't…" He said with an evil grin and threw Misako's sword over her head.
"Thanks, nice sword." Another voice spoke and Misako barely had the time to turn around…
SLASH.
…Before her head was removed from her shoulders.
"Nice strike, Hanabi-chan!" Naruto commented happily. "Did you have your fun?"
"Sure!" She replied, walking closer and kissing Naruto deeply. "But I'm gonna have much more when this useless battle is finished!"
"Hmhmhm…" The Overlord chuckled. "True. I can't wait to see how good you suck in your new form."
Hanabi licked her lips. "Why wait? Let Kurenai and Alucard have their fun while we have ours?" She asked, circling his chest with her finger.
"Well…" Naruto was about to accept when he looked at the sky and an insane look appeared on his face. "Well I'll be damned! Finally!"
Hanabi looked as well and pouted. "Aww… And when things were about to get good…"
A large statue was flying in the air.
"Nice to see you again, Savior-chan!" Naruto exclaimed, running a hand through his hair.
"Payback time?" Hanabi asked.
"Yup!"
"I don't think so." A sudden voice spoke.
"Ho?" Naruto looked over his shoulder. "My! If it isn't my good friend Danzou! How are you doing?"
Indeed. There stood Danzou, surrounded by his ROOT minions.
"I am fine, Uzumaki." Danzou replied. "Unlike you…"
"Why is that?" Naruto asked with a smile. "My balls are still in place, my cola stock is alright, I have a hot chick on my side." He pointed at Hanabi who waved happily. "And I'm seconds away from crushing this village! Life can't be better!"
Danzou only glared and unsealed his arm. "You know… Many years ago I wanted to sacrifice myself and die as a hero. But Niidaime forbade me." He then tore bandages from his eye. "This time will be different!"
"Sure, this time you will simply fuck up." Naruto stated with an evil grin.
"Distract the girl." Danzou ordered. "I will deal with Uzumaki."
"Hai, Danzou-sama!"
"Be sure to kill them quickly, babe." Naruto said, smacking Hanabi's ass lightly. "And maybe I'll take a short break before wasting THE jabroni."
Hanabi's eyes blazed with determination. "You guys are dead!" She instantly leapt toward them and started to kill ROOT members at an alarming rate.
"Umm… You do know that if this keeps up you won't have any men, do you?" Naruto pointed.
"It's useless." Danzou responded. "This was the last mission of ROOT and myself. No matter how it ends…"
"Pretty fatalistic… Well, how about I end it right now?" Naruto raised his hand. "Hadou #54 Haien!"
A wave of purple flame hit Danzou head on, obliterating him on the spot.
"Heh, I guess the mission was a failure."
"Not quite…"
"Huh?" Naruto turned around, only to receive a sword blade in the stomach. "Ouch, that hurt! Hmhmhm… But you know that won't stop me, Danzou."
"True, that won't." Danzo agreed and immediately grabbed Naruto by the shoulders. "This on the other hand…"
"Guah!" Naruto looked down in shock. "This… This is…"
"Yes, you get it right. Shiki Fuujin." Danzou smiled. "But I really shouldn't explain this to you, right?"
The Overlord gritted his teeth. "Release me, you imbecile! This will kill us both!"
"Yes, it will!" Danzou shouted. "And I will be remembered forever as the hero, who vanquished the demon!"
"Fucking asshole!" Naruto cursed, trying to move his hands. 'Shit, I can't move! I need to shake him off somehow!' "Hanabi! Get him off me!"
The girl heard him and tried to rush for aid, but ROOT members surrounded her from all sides, giving no chance to escape.
"Die, Uzumaki!" Danzou screamed, attempting to tear Naruto's soul off, but…
"Byakurai!" Hanabi's beam of light pierced him right through the heart. She got Naruto too, but his wound healed almost instantly. The leader of ROOT however…
"Guh!" Danzou gasped. "I… Will not… fail!" He grunted, continuing to rip Naruto's soul out.
"Yes, you will." Naruto stated calmly and brought his hand up. "Ippai Oni Tsupari!" (Full Demonic Thrust) With that Naruto slammed his open palm right in Danzou's stomach and few seconds later the man simply… exploded.
"Hmhmhm… Not a bad attempt, Danzou." The Overlord stated, wiping Danzou's blood off his face. "I knew I should've killed you earlier, and this is the best compliment my enemy can hope for." He looked over his shoulder to see Hanabi who was still disposing of ROOT forces. "I guess I won't take her fun away." The demon turned his head to look at the Savior. "It's time for the main dish… A dish best served cold." He said, launching himself high in the air…
With Kurenai…
"Guh!" Anko gasped in pain and lowered on one knee clutching her sliced abdomen.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk…" Kurenai shook her head, shouldering her sword. "Hurt, are you?"
Anko gritted her teeth. "You fucking traitorous bitch!"
Kurenai grinned. "Yup! So? Besides, you were a second away from committing a betrayal yourself, sister."
"But I didn't!"
"Yeah. That's because you're too damn weak!" Kurenai replied, kicking Anko in the face.
"Dah!" The purple haired kunoichi gasped, falling on her back. "Take this, bitch!" She screamed, throwing a kunai right at Kurenai's neck.
Said woman simply grinned wider and… let the kunai strike her.
STAB.
"Ouch…" She said, pulling out the knife slowly to Anko's shock. "Surprised?"
"What have you done to yourself?" Orochimaru's student yelled.
"Oh, nothing much…" Kurenai responded. "Just got a little bit… immortal."
"W-What?"
"Being a demon is nice. You could become one… if things would've been different…"
"Never!" Anko shouted, standing up shakily. "I will not get succumbed to power like Orochimaru!"
"Idiot." Kurenai said absently. "Might controls everything. And if you don't have it your ideals don't matter. You'll simply die anyway."
Anko spat some blood in anger. "Grah! To hell with it! Even if I die, I'll make sure that you're coming with me!" And with that she rushed at Kurenai once again.
Said demoness shook her head. "Pointless." She thrusted her sword forward, stabbing it deeply in Anko's chest.
"Aaaah!"
"You see, Anko? Everything was… huh?"
"Surprise, bitch!" Anko's voice sounded from behind.
"What? But you…" Kurenai looked in front of her again to see first Anko dissolving into mud. "How clever of you. But I don't see how…"
"That's how!" The purple haired kunoichi screamed, grabbing Kurenai's left hand. Sōjasōsai no Jutsu!"
Kurenai's eyes widened just before two snakes appeared out of nowhere and bit both her and Anko's wrists.
"Heh, it's over…" Anko muttered in satisfaction.
"You…" Kurenai watched in shock at her bitten wrist. "Do you have any idea of what you've done just now?"
"Sure. I just killed both of us." Anko stated with a smirk, but then suddenly fell on her knees, coughing blood. "Fuck…"
"Actually…" Kurenai said as amused smile appeared on her face. "You have just committed a suicide."
"Wh… Cough… What?"
Kurenai ran her free hand through her long raven hair. "You see, that might have worked against some other demon, but I have Naruto-kun's blood running through my veins." She said to Anko's immense shock. "There is no way something like that could ever kill me."
"Tch." Anko hissed and fell on her back in pain. "Ah damn it!"
"Anko, Anko, Anko…" Kurenai spoke, towering over her fallen opponent. "Always so reckless. I knew it would end this way for you, you know…"
"Fuck you… Cough… Ah fuck!"
Kurenai shook her head. "A shame, you had so much potential. Still, you were my friend at some point, so…" She quickly raised her sword and stabbed Anko through the heart. "Consider this a parting gift."
"Ah…" Anko's eyes widened, but then slowly closed… forever.
"Farewell, old friend." Kurenai said, withdrawing her sword.
"That was pretty merciful of you…" Alastor commented.
"Yeah." The red eyed woman replied. "But I make decisions based on my judgement."
"That is wise. I'm surprised to hear you say something like that…"
"What?" Kurenai exclaimed in slight anger. "You think I'm dumb?"
"Well…" The demon blade paused. "You know what they say; the girl can be either hot, or smart. And you're WAY too hot!"
"Well thanks… But get that saying out of your mind. Girl's brain has no connection with her physical beauty."
"Alright, I got it… But you should… DUCK!"
Kurenai immediately fell face forward… just in time to escape flying armored knight's spear.
"Ho! So they have finally come!" The woman exclaimed, getting up and taking a battle stance.
"And there is the big jabroni!" Alastor stated.
Kurenai turned her head to see the Savior. "Indeed."
"Then what the fuck are you waiting for? Let's have a go at him!"
"Hmhmhm… No, no. Naruto-kun got that, and I really don't want to get in his way." She then grinned and turned back to the Order's army. "These guys, however, are dead!"
With Naruto…
"Hmhmhm…" Naruto chuckled, standing on top of the highest building of the village. "Time to…" He wasn't allowed to finish however. Because right in his way, in a flash of yellow…
"NARUTO!"
…Exactly. One Uchiha Sasuke appeared.
Said Overlord rolled his eyes. "This is becoming real annoying real fast…"
Sasuke gritted his teeth and placed his sword in front of him. "Fight me, Naruto! Let's finish this!"
Naruto sighed and took out… another cola can. "Finish this? I don't know, Uke-chan, I finished this once already and you came back. That's unfair you know…"
"Unfair or not, you've got no choice." Sasuke stated. "If you wish to destroy this village, you'll need to go through me first!"
A sudden idea struck Naruto. "Say, you would do everything to save this village, right?"
"Right."
"But what do you wish to save more, Suna or Konoha?"
Sasuke's eyes widened. "What are you talking about?"
"What I'm talking about is that you're just too trusting. A total failure as a shinobi…"
"Stop this bullshit and say straight!"
"Fine, fine!" Naruto raised his hands defensively. "Remember when I said that in the beginning there were only me and Neji, just the two of us?"
"Yes, I remember." Sasuke said as his eyes narrowed. "What does this have to do with anything?"
"Hehehe…" Naruto chuckled again. "You see, I kind of lied. There weren't two of us… there were three…"
Sasuke's mouth opened in shock…
Konohagakure no sato. Prison facility…
'Damn this is ridiculous…' Single Konoha jounin was walking through the facility. 'How can those men walk with this thing between their legs? It's so… uncomfortable…'
"Hey you!" Another Konoha jounin called. "This is a restricted area. What are you doing here?"
First jounin looked at the cell number. 'Bingo!' He smiled. "Sorry, I guess I got lost and… hey! Look, the cell door is open!"
"Wha…?" The second one turned around… big mistake.
"Idiot." First shinobi said, snapping his colleague's neck. "And that was a joinin! Elite ninja! Damn this village is crap… Anyway, let's get Rapunzel out of the tower… though it's actually a dungeon… and her hair is not that long…" He muttered, opening the cell door.
"Who is it?" Female voice asked. "Is it you again, Orochimaru?"
"Nope!" Konoha jounin said cheerfully. "Rejoice, Tsunade-sama! I'm here to get you out!"
"Huh?" Tsunade's eyebrows rose. "Who are you? And how did you get here?"
"Uh, uh, u-uh!" The jounin waged his finger. "Not so fast, sister. Only Naruto knows the answer to these questions." He added with a wink.
Tsunade's eyes widened. "Naruto? Did he send you?"
"Yup! But I will only help you get out of this cell." The jounin said, undoing Tsunade's restraints. "The rest is up to you."
"Don't worry." Tsunade replied, rubbing her sore wrists. "I'm not a sannin for nothing."
"Goodie then!" The jounin smiled beamingly. "But there is one more thing you must do before you go."
"Huh? What is it?"
"When I say… you must punch me in the face hard enough to blow my brains out. And then you're free to leave."
Tsunade's eyes widened in shock. "You're asking me to kill you? Are you insane? There is…"
"Kill me?" The jounin interrupted. "Oh please! As if something as insignificant as that could really kill me. Now on my command…" He closed his eyes and did a handseal.
'He's Naruto's subordinate, so I guess he knows what he's doing…' She shrugged and prepared to strike.
"Okay… NOW!" The jounin shouted and Tsunade launched one of her crushing punches at his head.
But then his eyes opened and…
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" He screamed, just before…
SPLASH.
…His brains became a detail of cell's interior.
"What the…?" Tsunade stared in confusion at the motionless body on the ground. "Why did he scream if he knew what was coming?" She shook her head. "Never mind that. He asked for it, besides I have more pressing matters right now…" The former Hokage stated, escaping her cell.
Sunagakure no sato. Naruto's location…
"So you see, my dear Uke-chan, you should worry more about your home instead of this useless village."
Sasuke gritted his teeth in anger. "Grrrr! It ain't over, Naruto!" He shouted, disappearing in a flash of yellow.
"Hahaha!" Naruto laughed. "Imbecile! And what if I lied? Bah, no matter. This world will always be full of idiots. One more one less, who in the blue hell is even doing the count?"
"Stop talking and start walking!" Yamato interrupted. "Good people of Sunagakure are waiting for the show!"
The Overlord grinned evilly. "Indeed! Let's give it to them!" (Starting song: "Hangman" by Rev Theory)
At the same time high in the air the Savior was flying, surrounded by many squadrons of flying knights.
"This is the final battle!" Sanctus preached. "Be brave and search for…"
"Tyrant Rave!"
The Order leader turned his head to see how Naruto, covered in flames, tore through several of squads like a bullet.
"Ah, Uzumaki…" The old man spoke. "You have arrived at last."
"Indeed." Naruto spoke, floating in the air. "Come to think of it… I have arrived hours ago and still haven't said FINALLY! NARUTO HAS COME BACK TO SU… SU… Suckers couldn't even name a village properly for me to give some smart ass comment about it!"
"Silence!" Sanctus shouted. "Last time you got away from us. But not now! Kill him!"
Naruto simply waited until a large number of flying knights approached close enough and smirked when they did.
"Shinra Tensei!"
BLAST.
Pieces of knight armor were flying everywhere. But then Naruto noticed something strange.
"Huh? No bodies? Well that's… gross."
"How did you do that?" Sanctus asked in anger.
Naruto shrugged. "Well, I took of my pants and…"
"That's not what I was asking about!"
"Well, you didn't specify…"
"Enough!" Sanctus shouted, disappearing inside of Savior's body. "Your end is here, Uzumaki!"
Naruto rolled his eyes. "Why do they always say the same thing?"
"What do you expect them to say?" Yamato asked back. "Oh look, I'm going to be killed by you now! Huh?"
Naruto shrugged again. "Would be nice for a change…"
"DIE!"
Naruto looked up to see a massive hand descending on him from above.
"Hn." He smirked and just before the hit connected the Overlord disappeared in a burst of flames.
"WHERE ARE YOU, UZUMAKI?"
"Over here." Was simply said… from behind.
"YOU…" The Savior turned around and froze in shock. "THAT… THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!"
"Hmhmhm… is it?" Naruto's smirk widened as he threw his sunglasses away. "To tell the truth, this size is quite… uncomfortable. If you know what I mean…"
Sanctus knew… because Naruto was now the same size as the Savior himself.
"THIS CHANGES NOTHING!" Sanctus shouted. "OUR SAVIOR IS UNSTOPPABLE!" With that he threw a punch… only for Naruto to catch it with his glowed hand.
"W-WHAT?"
"Why so surprised?" Naruto asked. "The size isn't everything. Take Orochimaru for example. Yeah, he's got the size, but what good it does if it's not working?"
"WHAT'S NOT WORKING?"
"His penis of course!"
"QUIET!" The Order leader screamed as the Savior created some fireballs. "IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO DIE AND BRING US THE ULTIMATE GLORY!"
Naruto grinned evilly. "Just bring it, bitch!"
With Alucard…
BANG.
Another bullet was fired by Alucard's gun… and once again it was stopped by Gaara's sand.
"Damn you're annoying…" The vampire muttered.
"Look who's talking!" Gaara replied. "I crushed your body seven times and yet you're still alive. What are you?"
'Maybe I should try…' Alucard scratched the back of his head. "Well umm… thanks for asking. I am a… jabroni beating… blah, blah, blah… pie eating… blah, blah, blah… something more, something else… No-life-king Alucard…"
Gaara's eyebrows rose. "You know… that was really lame."
The vampire scowled. 'Damn! It looks much easier when he does that.' He sighed. "Well, at least I tried… And besides…" He suddenly stopped and looked up. "Well, well, well. So you have finally decided to get serious…"
Gaara's eyes narrowed. "What are you talking about?"
The vampire gave him a sinister grin. "You probably won't listen to me, but I suggest you look up."
The Kazekage hesitated for some moments, but then he too looked up… only to gasp in shock.
There in the air was enormous Naruto. And he was about to fight the Savior.
"What… What is this…?" The red haired teen muttered.
"That, my friend, is the end of your village." Alucard stated. "Watch closely, it will be over in a blink of an eye…"
With Sasuke…
"Sakura!" The last Uchiha shouted, landing on the ground. "We've got problems."
"Indeed we have." The pink haired girl replied.
"So you know about the traitor?" Sasuke asked in confusion. "Where did you…"
"What traitor?" Sakura interrupted.
"One of Naruto's men. We've got another mole."
Kunoichi's eyes widened. "Then at least we know who did this."
"Did what?" Sasuke asked.
"I tried to activate the portal in order to evacuate civilians and wounded, but it's refusing to work." Sakura stated. "I see only one reason for that, someone broke it."
Sasuke's eyes narrowed. "Who used it the last?"
Sakura thought for a moment. "Hinata did… but it can't be! Hinata, after everything Naruto did to her… and what about Gaara?"
"Perhaps she was leading us on the entire time." The Uchiha said. "But let's worry about that later. You need to make another portal, and you need to do this quick, because…" He glanced at the sky. "I don't really think we have much time left…"
With Kurenai…
"WOOHOO! You're the best master I've had in ages!" Alastor stated as Kurenai plunged it through another man's heart.
"Am I really this good?" She asked.
"Nah. It's just that your touch gives me that… funny feeling."
Kurenai sighed. 'Why did I get such perverted sword?'
"Well, what can I say, babe… If I'm to be wielded by someone's hand, let it be a hot girl's hand! Hahahahahaha!" The demon blade replied. "Besides, do you think I'm the only one like that? Seen your boyfriend's sword, Yamato? He's a two times bigger pervert than I am!"
Kurenai rolled her eyes. 'I wonder why Naruto did not complain… yet.'
"That's because he's an even bigger pervert than his sword."
The woman grinned. "Yeah, I heard that…"
"How curious." A sudden voice spoke. "And here I thought that I have masked my presence completely."
"Huh?" Kurenai turned around to see a strange dark skinned man with a monocular in his left eye. "Who the fuck are you?"
The man looked really surprised. "I am Agnus and… Wait, you didn't sense me?"
"Not really. I was just talking to my sword."
The stranger paused. "Well, that's kind of embarrassing… But I guess we can just skip the pleasantries then." He said, changing his form.
"Oh?" Kurenai's lips twisted into a sick smile. "I guess I have finally found myself a challenge!"
"A challenge you say?" Agnus replied already in his released form. "What an amusing girl you are! I can't wait to dissect you!"
Said girl raised an eyebrow. "Dissect me? You?" She brought Alastor up. "Fair enough. I want to see your insides as well!"
At the sound of that Agnus immediately flew up and pointed his finger at Kurenai. "Attack her!"
The red eyed demoness suddenly found herself surrounded by a huge amount of lesser demons.
"Prefer to do things with the hands of others? Pathetic." She stated, cutting through them effortlessly with her sword. "Is this the best you can do?"
"Tch." Agnus scowled and grabbed two fish-like demons.
"Oh? Finally decided to participate? Well bring it, bug-man!"
"Haaaa!" Agnus started to spin around himself, nearing Kurenai at the same time. But when he was about to strike her, she just vanished. "Where…?"
SLASH.
"DAH!" Agnus fell over on the ground, turning back to human form. "H-H-How? How could there be such difference b-b-between us?"
Kurenai raised an eyebrow. "What, you want to become a woman now?"
"T-T-That's not what I meant!" Agnus shouted. "I was talking about our demonic powers!"
"Oh… You expect all demons to be equals?" Kurenai asked in amusement. "Here's a newsflash for you, pal. Some demons are far superior to others. And you are among those others…"
"But why? Please, for the sake of my research! Tell me what I lack!" He took out his notes and started to scribe something.
"Umm… okay." Kurenai replied. "You lack…"
"What? WHAT?"
"Common sense, sex appeal and a talking sword. And if you wish to become stronger…"
"What? What must I do?" Agnus looked up… only for his eyes to turn from hopeful to terrified.
"Die and reincarnate as someone else." Kurenai stated, firing her Cero.
"NO!" Agnus screamed just before a beam of red light engulfed him completely.
"YES! I love you, baby!" Alastor stated.
"Hey! Don't call me baby! Only Naruto can do tha…" Kurenai stopped when she looked up. "Speaking of the devil!" She smiled viciously. "Nah! After all I can't stand aside on this one!"
With Naruto…
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!" Naruto laughed, blocking another strike from the Savior. "Is this all you've got, jabroni? That's not even enough for a challenge! Come on; give me your best shot!"
"THAT WILL BE AN OVERKILL!" Sanctus shouted from within the Savior. "MY NORMAL ATTACKS WILL BE MORE THAN ENOUGH!"
Naruto simply sighed and raised his left arm to block the heel drop.
"Looks like I'm being underestimated… Well then…"
A quick flash of light and Savior's left arm fell on the ground, creating a huge impact.
"Still think it will be enough?" The Overlord mocked, shouldering his enormous demon blade.
"AAAH! YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS, UZUMAKI!" The Order leader yelled. "FINE! YOU WANTED MY BEST SHOT? HERE IT IS!"
Naruto grinned in satisfaction when he saw his enemy preparing that beam of his.
"Ah, finally!" He raised his free left hand and started to create a black sphere on the tip of his finger. "I've been waiting for this very moment!"
"DIE! DIVINE BEAM!"
"CERO OSCURAS!"
FLASH!
Two energies clashed against one another, fighting for domination.
"YOU WILL NOT PASS!" Sanctus screamed. "THIS IS MY LIFE'S WORK!"
"Excellent!" Naruto replied. "Destroying people's lives is my specialty! And now it's your time to know your role…"
Naruto's beam started to overpower the Savior's.
"Shut your mouth…"
"GH!" Sanctus grunted, struggling to maintain balance.
"And right in front of the millions…"
"AND MILLIONS!" Two voices shouted at once.
"And millions! Wha…?" Naruto looked around.
"Surprised?" Hanabi asked, from his right shoulder.
"Did you miss us?" Kurenai did the same only from the left one.
"Sure did! And if you wanna help me bring this motherfucker down, give me a Hell Yeah!"
"HELL YEAH!"
"Then let's lay the smackdown on his candy ass!" Naruto shouted as his Cero finally overpowered the Savior's beam and hit him head on.
"GAAH!"
"Tough luck pal!" Naruto exclaimed, stabbing the statue right in the middle of the chest with his sword.
"Oh! Right through the jewel!" Kurenai stated in excitement. "I want too! HAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Wow!" Hanabi said, watching Kurenai change her form.
"Ahh! That feels nice!" The red eyed woman spoke… The truth is her eyes were the only things that didn't change. Now her entire body was engulfed in some silver armor. Her hair also turned silver and became longer for at least a half of former size. "My turn!" With that she jumped off of Naruto's shoulder and flew straight at the Savior in a spinning dive.
"Damn she looks so hot now!" Naruto said just as Kurenai pierced right through the jewel on the Savior's head with her entire body. "Hah, looks like he was weak on a head!"
"Alright, my turn!" Hanabi stated as she dropped on her knees.
"What are you…?" Naruto's words died in his throat when Hanabi's clothes disappeared and her hair shot up, creating some portal. "Ho-Ho-Holy shit!"
"That's not something you should be gawking at." The girl replied. "Look there."
Naruto did and his jaw fell. "Now I've seen everything…"
True. Right in front of him there was a figure of a woman… about five times as big as he was.
"What is she going to do?" The Overlord asked.
Hanabi smirked. "I suggest you remove your sword."
Naruto's eyebrows shot up. In one quick motion he withdrew Yamato's blade from the Savior's chest… just in time. Because Hanabi's summon delivered a mighty uppercut to poor bastard's… body. Yeah, the fist was big enough to hit the entire body! And it was also strong enough that he disappeared in the skies.
"Damn!" Naruto exclaimed looking up.
"It's not over yet though." Hanabi said as her summon disappeared.
"What do you mean?" Naruto asked.
"The village still stands." The girl replied with an evil grin.
"Oh, that's easily fixed." The Overlord replied, preparing one of his Arcanas to finish the job… but suddenly he noticed something.
The Savior's body was falling from the skies.
That second Naruto's eyes sparkled in realization. "Hmhmhmhmhm… HAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! Looks like we will not be using magic this time!" He turned to Hanabi. "Do not land on the ground!"
"Why not?" She asked.
Naruto's grin widened. "Because I will turn this village into a piece of art!" He shouted, jumping high into the air.
"Got ya!" Kurenai stated, catching Hanabi in midair. "What is he up to?"
Hanabi shrugged. "I guess we'll find out shortly…"
"What are you going to do?" Yamato asked when Naruto reached the Savior's body and… grabbed his head. "Oh… my… fucking… god…"
"HELL YEAH! This will be the biggest RKO I have ever done! HAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
All survivors of Sunagakure battle watched in last second fear how two huge bodies descended from the sky at insane speed and…
"Not very appropriate, but… ART IS A CRASH!"
IMPACT!
The destruction of Sunagakure no sato came in a flash. Almost the entire village got crushed under two massive demons. And small parts that didn't got destroyed by nearby mountains, which collapsed on top of them because of a shockwave. As for the Savior himself… His body crumbled in several places and his head was completely shattered from the sheer force of the impact.
In other words, Suna was buried… or fucked. Whichever you like.
"Hmhmhmhm…" Naruto chuckled, standing up already in his human form. "If that wasn't epic, what was?"
"That orgy with kitsune clan." Alucard stated, appearing beside his partner with a bottle of vodka in his hand. "Nice show there."
"Thanks, everything for my fans!" Naruto bowed mockingly. "Girls?"
"We're here!" Hanabi said as she and Kurenai landed nearby.
"That certainly was an interesting way to make a statement." Kurenai concluded.
The Overlord grinned. "Well, I was after all…"
"UZUMAKI!" A sudden shout interrupted him.
"Who…?" Naruto looked up. There, floating in the air was a lone… sphere of sand.
Alucard rolled his eyes. "Damn this guy is annoying."
"You don't say…" Naruto agreed.
"I'll take care of him." Kurenai said, summoning her sword, but…
"No." Naruto interrupted her by raising his hand. "I got it." He said, unleashing his wings, and flew up to match Gaara.
"You! You have destroyed everything!" The red haired teen screamed. "My village, my subordinates and friends! The Order! You have killed them all!"
Naruto looked at him in amusement. "Yup… so?"
Gaara exploded with anger. "So? SO? You… YOU MONSTER!"
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!" Naruto laughed hard. "Oh, that's rich, coming from you! A monster… yeah, I might be. But you are something worse, a moron."
"ENOUGH! I will end your reign of terror for good!"
The Overlord snorted. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say. But before you do that, care to answer a question? Say, do you think your sand defense is absolute?"
"That's right!" The former Kazekage stated. "Nothing can get inside of this sphere beside me; I perfected it after that battle with Akatsuki."
"Hmhmhm…" Naruto chuckled. "My, how confident you are! But you see… you're wrong. Because aside from you, there is someone in that sphere, even right now."
"What are you talking about?"
Naruto's grin widened. "Say… it's not very bright in there, ne?" He said, raising his hand. And immediately after he did that…
"Wha…? Ah! AAAAAAAAAHH!" Gaara screamed from the inside and his sand started to crumble. About a minute later it was completely gone, showing Gaara trapped in a cocoon of… darkness.
"Perfected it, did you?" Naruto mocked. "Sabaku no Gaara… your entire life you were crushing people with your sand. Well I thought it would be fitting if you would go the same way!" He raised his hand again and Gaara's eyes widened.
"You…"
"Farewell, Kazekage-sama." Naruto started to clench his fist, when…
"WAIT!"
"Huh?" He stopped when a bloody and battered Temari appeared in front of him, flying on her fan. "Ho! So you survived as well! That's… interesting."
"Please don't kill him!" She pleaded. "If I ever meant something to you, you will… GAH!" The kunoichi suddenly stopped when she noticed the blade of Naruto's sword… inside of her stomach.
"TEMARI!" Gaara screamed in horror and desperation.
"W-Why?"
Naruto snorted again. "Meant something to me? You? Eh-Eh! You were just another expendable." With that he twisted his blade several times and withdrew it in one quick motion.
"NOOOO!" Gaara screamed again when his sister's already lifeless body began to fall. "UZUMAKI! YOU BASTARD!"
"Aww, how sweet!" The Overlord exclaimed, sheathing his sword with a click. "A sibling love! Well don't worry, buddy, you will join her soon. After all, I always wanted to do this!" He raised his hand again and clenched his fist. "Kuroi Sousou!"
SPLASH.
"HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! Three down, one to go!"
"Nice." Kurenai said with a smile when Naruto descended to the ground. "I always wanted to see this fool put down."
"You're welcome." The Overlord replied.
"So… only Konoha remains?" Alucard asked.
"Yep. Right now?"
"HELL NO!" Both Hanabi and Kurenai shouted at the same time.
"W-What?" Naruto asked in confusion.
"First we're going to crush a few beds." Hanabi stated with a lecherous grin.
"Nice!" Alucard replied. "Can I join?"
"NO!"
"Ouch…" The vampire took a step back. "That hurts, you know…"
"Sorry pal…" Naruto started. "But…"
Suddenly…
"The power of Sparda! Why won't you give me strength? Am I not worthy?"
The four turned their heads slowly to see half-dead Sanctus with a sword in his hands.
"Who?" Hanabi asked.
"Rock-paper-scissors?" Naruto suggested.
"Nah." Alucard took out his gun…
BANG.
…And blew Sanctus's brains out.
"See? Easy and simple."
Kurenai shook her head. "Selfish son of a bitch…"
"I'm selfish? And who's not letting me into your orgy?"
"Fine, fine…" Kurenai waved him off.
"Hey, Naruto-sama?"
"Yes, Hanabi?"
"I like the sword, can I have it?"
"Sure."
Hanabi picked up Sparda's sword. "Hello there! Will you talk to me?"
"Umm… sure. If you will clean me up nicely."
"WOOHOO! It talked!"
Naruto raised an eyebrow. "For real?"
'Bitch!' Kurenai thought. 'Now she has a talking sword too…'
"How come I'm the only one without a demon blade?"
"That's because you're a loser." Hanabi stated.
"Ouch! That hurts!" The vampire exclaimed. "Then you are…"
"Enough bickering." Naruto interrupted and turned to what once was village of Hidden Sand. "Anyone else is alive around here?"
Silence.
"Finally! And thus Know Your Role team scores again! IF YOU SMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLL…"
"SHUT UP!"
...
And here is your fucking chapter. Many people died, but hell, they had to die somewhere!
Okay, time for the advice… Umm…
"Never give up… Only losers cum first."
Fuck like hell and sleep well.
Darthemius.