章 2177: 45
Chapter 45: The Peter Parker Intervention
Notes:
Guys I've finished drafting this. There is only editing left and having a beta (all praise ur2close) that takes like half the time it usually does. I feel so weird and am just writing random oneshots now. Also the change in chapter count is cause while chapter 54 was fine it just killed the pacing so it needed to die. Don't worry, it reads better now.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Bucky felt a cold shiver as he spotted Darcy eating Captain Crunch cereal straight from the box while eyeing the glowing blue...thing she had been working on all evening. It was a defcon 8 event for Darcy Lewis to eat Captain Crunch out of the box. The last time it'd happened in his presence she'd crushed a glowing blue thing with a sledgehammer, causing a small explosion that had needed three fire extinguishers. He was ready. Hopefully.
He set aside his scribe work. Sorting through and rewriting Dr Foster's notes and then filing them could wait, inevitable explosion could not. Bucky looked at the camera. "FRIDAY, send for Captain Rogers."
-"I have alerted the Captain."-
Nodding, he got up and made his way to the oddest of the Starks. He braced himself for the inevitable. "Darcy, would you assist me with my hair? And with understanding the news? I'm unsure if I should be concerned by it or not. Also Steve is planning on boiling food for dinner again. I require your assistance." He then did the thing with his eyes that had always made Steve fold.
Darcy's mouth opened as she stared at him. "Oh wow." Her lips pulled into a smirk. "Puppy eyes or no puppy eyes I know when I'm being played hot stuff."
"I don't know what you're talking about." He replied, he would not be broken by a pretty dame staring at him like she could see straight through him. He wouldn't.
She sighed and looked around her chaotic work space. "I suppose I am going full mad scientist here. Fine, I'll allow it." Stretching like a cat she yawned. "I expect a foot rub, and stop twitching I'll leave your hair alone Hoboman."
Bucky would have let out a relieved breath if he was a different man. As it was his muscles unclenched in relief. "Ok?"
"Excellent! Oh and popcorn! If we're watching the news and explaining it then we're snacking like pros."
Bucky just nodded, he knew where all the snacks in the tower were. His monitoring anklet didn't restrict him from snack areas. "I can secure snacks."
"I'm glad I'm saving your butt. I mean spectacular butt aside, you're a good dude." She patted his arm. "Come on soldier. Let's get our snack on. Ooo! And coffee!"
He felt the oddest sensation at being called 'soldier'. It was...oddly nostalgic how she said it. He politely fell into step with her towards the elevator. "I can do coffee."
"You already summon your life partner?" She looked at him clearly expecting a yes.
Bucky felt like stumbling. "Who?"
"Captain Dorito." She made a clucking sound with her tongue.
He knew that one, he'd seen the dorito memes last time he'd been trapped with Darcy for longer than ten minutes outside of the lab. "Yes, I requested his presence."
"Coolio." She hooked their arms together like there was nothing terrifying about touching him. It was...nice.
Bucky had found he really liked kettle corn. He had a whole bag of it, his cat Primrose curled around his shoulders like a fluffy scarf. Steve was working his way through a bag of chocolate covered nuts while Bob purred away on his lap. Meanwhile Darcy was buried in throw pillows and munching on popcorn. It almost made the content of the news tolerable. The latest evidence from the trial had hit the news cycle and it was disturbing to see the security footage of him strapped to the chair. He shivered everytime the footage came on screen.
"This is macabre." Steve grumbled from his seat, he was quietly bristling in disgust at the dirty details being plastered out as entertainment to the people.
Darcy blew out a noisy breath. "At least they're sympathetic to our favorite murder assassin. I'm the great slut. The whore who broke up Spiderquake. Totes a contender for most hated person in New York. And Tony lives here."
Steve gave a sympathetic looked towards Darcy. "Is there a way to fix that?"
"Not without Daisy getting her ass back here." Darcy grumbled. "I'm half tempted to use the new time travel tech early to go get her just to fix everything. Christ and Peter needs her. He's a walking bruise after Rhino."
Bucky cleared his throat. "Was the horn on that guy a suit or actually part of him?"
Darcy blinked. "You know I don't know. Actual cops did the arresting, nobody bothered to fight them on jurisdiction. Ya know, they cop car bitch slapped the dude and all."
"Tell Peter if he comes by the gym once he's better I'll help him with fighting against opponents with enhanced strength." Steve offered.
Bucky glanced at Darcy. "Is there really not a way to make the media like you again?"
"Not without Daisy." Darcy cocked her head. "I suppose if I came out as gay it'd prove I hadn't stollen away Spiderman and played with Quicksilver's heart as well. But I'm not the queer sibling and it'd be super gross to use an identity like that. Sides, Daisy'll be back one way or another by June. I just need to find something to do now that we cracked time travel."
Steve stared at her. "If Ultron hadn't of happened I could try not to learn about what you do in the labs."
Darcy smirked. "Well I've been thinking about some more attempts at dragging Thor. He should be back from whatever mission he was on. Going to drag him back by his cape."
"I can help with that part." Bucky offered. He mostly felt rather useless. He was either in court having to look sympathetic and not murderous. In the labs getting snacks, coffee, and filing paperwork, or in his room playing with the cats. It was a...odd life. He was fairly sure he'd have been baffled by it before the train.
Darcy held up a hand for a fist bump. "Thanks dude."
"Sure?" He carefully bumped her fist.
////
Peter opened the front door and stared at his friends. "Hey guys? Did we have a study night planned?"
"I brought root beer!" Ned held up the six pack of soda, a nervous quiver to his voice.
MJ rolled her eyes and brushed Peter out of the way just marching into the house. "We need to talk."
"Uh...about what?" Peter limped after MJ, his foot in a soft cast for another couple days. "Did I forget an assignment or something? Oh god do we need to pull an allnighter?"
Ned patted his shoulder while closing the door. "Not about school."
"Come on, we'll talk in your room." MJ promptly marched up the stairs like she'd been invited in.
Peter shared a baffled look with Ned. How had they ended up a trio with MJ again? Also since when was she their ring leader?
Ned shrugged though. "Come on, there's uh...stuff. Yeah we need to talk Pete."
"Pete?" Peter's brow furrowed? What the? This was weird. He limped along after them towards his room.
As he got to the room he frowned at MJ sitting in his computer chair while Ned had dropped down on the foot of the bed. Both of them were giving him the weirdest looks. "So uh...what's going on guys?"
"You need an intervention." MJ replied without a flicker of doubt. "We get you're upset with your sister's boyfriend cheating on her, and her going out of town for a while. But getting into fights? You're going to get really hurt."
Peter opened and then closed his mouth. "What?" His voice pitched up. "I'm not getting into fights cause I'm upset about Daisy breaking up with anyone." He crossed his arms to avoid scratching at the side of his head. Fidgeting betrayed nervousness. Nervousness implied guilt. Spy lesson ten. Don't fucking fidget.
Ned looked so painfully sympathetic. "We know Daisy's Quake, what happened with Stark and Spiderman. It's got to have been hard. But you need to deal with it and stop bottling it all up inside."
"And it's not just the fighting." MJ cut in. "You've been distant at school. Staring into space, spending less time studying. You're self-destructing. When was the last time you actually came to a study night with us?" She gave him an accusing stare.
Peter gaped actually...oh it'd been since before Daisy got kidnapped to the future hadn't it. So that was over two months ago now."... I'm sorry?"
"We're here for you. You're my best friend." Ned offered and oh wow he was worried enough he was getting mushy. Fuck.
He...these were his friends. And he hurt, just everywhere and he missed Daisy, he missed his friends, it was exhausting being Spiderman with so little back up. Sure Pietro helped but he was busy with firefighter stuff, and Wanda was drowning in school work and her job, and just everyone else was caught up in the trial. Darcy had been throwing herself into the science it was just… these were his friends. He didn't want to lie.
MJ raised a brow. "We'll help you fuck up Spiderman if that's what you need. I used to play fast pitch, still have the bat."
"Wait, what?" Peter was...he was alarmed and touched by that. "We don't need to beat up Spiderman."
Ned's face set into something stubborn. "Daisy's your sister, and she's kind of our friend too. It's not right he dumped her like that."
"I…" Peter was...he hated keeping them away from the rest of his life. Everyone else knew. And having to hear about Spiderquake was bad enough. But they were worried about him. "Look, it's not...I'm just..going through some stuff?"
MJ's stare that made it feel like she could see through him didn't change. "Really, that stuff involve your sister leaving for a while after her boyfriend cheated on her being publically just everywhere in the news right now?"
"It's...Spiderman isn't that bad. I'm not mad." Which was mostly true. He was just...frustrated and wanted his sister back. Also to never hear the words 'Spiderquake' again in his life. Peter shifted, leaning against his door frame.
Ned frowned. "He cheated on Daisy. He's the worst. We can start up a twitter page to make fun of him?"
"Or break his kneecaps." MJ muttered under her breath.
Ned didn't disagree with her. "We're just saying we're here for you and we can take care of it all for you."
"Guys!" Peter bit at his lower lip…. "Ok right, it's fine. Really." He moved forward and shut the door behind him. Aunt May or Darcy popping up would be the worst. Especially if Darcy chose now to stop by. He shifted awkwardly.
MJ crossed her arms. "It's not fine."
"It's…" Peter shuffled and he just….he could see the fight in their eyes. "I'm Spiderman!" Burst out of his mouth.
MJ's eyes widened, but there was something there. Her mouth opening ever so slightly.
Ned on the other hand snorted. "Don't be stupid." He laughed. "That's a good one."
"Wait..prove it." MJ hadn't looked away from him, but she was taking it seriously.
Ned's head whipped around to MJ. "What? He's obviously joking."
"I don't think so." MJ said slowly, her eyes not leaving Peter.
He swallowed. He was going to do this. Darcy and Daisy's friends all knew. He knocked on the fake panel of his wall, it slid down showing the suit, and his various bits and pieces of tech that were ready to go. "Uh...I kinda am...the bruising and ankle are from Rhino."
"What. The. Hell." Ned gaped at the suit.
MJ stood up. She took a step forward, reaching out she touched the suit. "It's real."
"Yeah uh…" Peter winced. "Surprise?"
Peter cracked open the drone to show off the innards to his friends. "Check it, they're programmed to automatically find and check high areas around crime scenes to make sure it's not a trap."
"Huh, that's kinda brilliant." MJ leaned in to take a look.
"Wait, wait." Ned was frowning. "So you and Daisy have been pretending to be romantically involved to keep anyone from realizing you're in high school. But she got kidnapped by future aliens and your sister Darcy is Darcy Stark which means your dad is Tony Stark. So everyone thinks you cheated on your sister with your other sister?!"
Peter nodded. "Basically, though the aliens aren't from the future. They just sent Daisy and her old SHIELD team to the future."
"What the heck." Ned said towards the floor. He looked up. "Wait, your parents were married does that mean….oh….sorry."
Peter shifted slightly. "It's...Tony's not that bad. At least my kinda step-dad isn't a serial killer like Daisy's."
"I'm sorry what?"
////
Pepper was concerned. Typically just knowing Tony meant being concerned. But this, this was a different sort of concern. It wasn't just the dread of knowing he was doing something that was going to inevitably blow. That was typical, he was always blowing things up. His worst fuck up to date being Ultron. Though if her understanding of the situation with the Accords had been correct, it almost topped that one. Thank god for Darcy. Darcy was a ticking time bomb till she blew up something though so small mercies as far as Pepper was concerned.
No, her current state of concern was that Tony wasn't blowing anything up. In fact, disturbingly, he'd been dutifully working with Legal and meeting with various politicians and the Director of SHIELD since they'd finished making time travel. Pepper was very specifically not thinking about the fact there was a fully functional time machine in the tower. She just...no. It just...if Daisy made it back without interference she was making them destroy the machine. It was just tempting fate to keep something like that.
The problem was she couldn't see anything bad in what Tony was doing. No theatrics, in fact the media was busy with tarring and feathering Darcy as a slut when they weren't reeling from the horrific details from the Barnes case that just...no one really cared what Tony was up to. She lived in fear of the day he pulled his nose out of this current project and noticed what was going on with Darcy. Pepper actually thought Darcy was being sensible about the whole thing and acting like it wasn't happening. It was temporary, once Daisy returned it would be a simple thing to make the whole thing look like conjecture. Darcy was probably planning on suing a lot of them.
Starks were terrifying when insulted.
Tony's current project was simple. Force the world kicking and screaming into political deals that meant when the next alien invasion happened it wasn't just up to the Avengers. That actual armies could be and would be mobilized. It was a good idea. A few rapid response teams could have saved hundreds if not thousands of live in the Battle of New York. Not to mention having a timeline and confirmed military forces ready to go in and assist in containing the situation the nuclear bomb would never have been a viable plan. It was a good system.
Hence the concern. "You haven't been into the labs in a week?"
"Very observant." He prodded lightly while flipping through legal paperwork. It wasn't even digital…
She stepped to his side, touching his shoulder. "Did they accept the deal?"
"The EU accepted, which means German, UK, France, Ukraine, and Greece's deals are valid and binding. With that I should get more to sign on." He closed the document, spinning so he was facing her. "Did you get Canada to sign?"
Pepper sighed, it was the smart move. Countries legally forced to provide military support in case of invasion. Agreeing to keep a team on standby at all times for deployment in case of large scale alien action against the planet. It was..a basis on which a bulwark of international treaties could be built. "As well as Mexico and Cuba. Our offices were contacted by Russia and I have a meeting with Japanese diplomats tomorrow morning."
"Good, good." His face was drawn and serious. "Thanos is coming."
She brushed at the edge of his hair. "If your vision was right."
"Future seeing aliens agree. He's coming." Tony's eyes were determined, surprisingly clear of alcohol as he wrapped an arm around her waist. "We'll be ready for him."
Pepper didn't disagree, this would...at least give the Avengers an international military coalition to back them should the worst come to be. "We're leaving SI vulnerable to our competition selling so much at cost to nations who agree to sign."
"Spawn or I will invent something to help make stupid money." That familiar stupid grin came on his face. "Besides, we're a trillion dollar company, it'll take more than a few lost profit margins to bankrupt us."
She sighed, it worried her she couldn't see the danger coming with this. Or rather she saw nothing but danger. But he was right. This was better. "Hill sent a memo, she found a Hydra Head. Brigadier General Hale in the Air Force."
"Hale? Hard ass sure, but a Nazi? Guess we know what stick was up her ass." Tony stood up waving his arm, pulling up digital files. "Natasha and Steve?"
Pepper hummed. "And Sam. They left three hours ago."
"Good." He frowned. "We need to salt and burn the earth, all that Shakespearean crap."
Pepper didn't offer comfort. He wouldn't want it and he was right. "Anti hero groups are going to get more aggressive."
"Apparently my kids are destined to save the planet." Tony pulled up the carefully written out predictions of the future he'd managed to get out of Noah. "SHIELD will work with Daisy. We've got Hill and Romanoff."
She actually had to pause at that. "You want an intelligence agency?"
"Make sure we have several we can use. Who said anything about owning one? Femme fatales may be hot but so last decade."
Pepper's lips twitched. "I'll organize a meeting with the CIA director and someone in Interpol. We can at least share intel."
"You are being concerningly useful. Not even a verbal spanking. Did the pod people get you?"
She rolled her eyes. "No your Spawn got to you. Keep it up and we might even revisit that conversation about kids of our own in the future."
Tony's whole face softened. "I think that'd be pretty great, top five events."
"Top five?" She challenged, though she felt fond as she did so.
He grinned. "Well my oldest Spawn tased Thor and my other daughter and son punched Captain America in the face. Then there's always the first Led Zeppelin concert I went to, those are hard to beat out. I mean that afterparty was pretty epic."
Pepper went to reply only to pause as Darcy's face popped up on the screen. There was a certain frayed nervousness wafting off the girl. Well, there was that explosion she'd been waiting for. "Darcy, what happened?"
-"So uh...short version I made a portal and we're evacuating Asgard temporarily to the tower. Just letting you know. Cheers. Bye."-
Pepper blinked. She looked at Tony. "Well that sounds like something for you to handle Poprocks." She accepted she wasn't going to be getting any sleep.
Notes:
We've caught up to Ragnarok peeps!
週次パワーステータス
-- 推薦
ランキング 
-- 推薦
チケット