章 1015: 29
028 - Ambushes, counter-ambushes and other traumatic experiences (2 of 3)
Mitsuzuri Ayako
Sometimes, I hate being right.
I mean, don't misunderstand, being right is generally a good thing. I love being right when a kouhai asks for advice or when I'm answering test questions, and I definitely love being right when Tohsaka and I have different opinions. But when I'm expecting trouble? Boy do I hate being right then.
Haku has been on cloud nine even since she started fucking her brother and it's ever so fun to watch her go about her life thinking that she's being subtle about it. Which is fair, Emiya is a beefcake and I'd take a bite myself if I had the chance so I can't really blame her, it's not like they're blood related or anything.
But I digress. Case is, she's been particularly full of life for months, and thus I couldn't help but worry a bit when she came back from the weekend looking so serious and focused. Oh, it's not like she suddenly became a sour broodypuss or anything and I doubt most people would've noticed the change, but I'm not most people.
The second clue was the bet. It's just not in Haku's character to bet things away, much in a relatively simple challenge like the one she issued and even less when the price was going to run so expensive for her. Haku might not be strapped for money, but she's never been the wasteful sort either.
I've been keeping my eyes peeled ever since. So yeah, when Matou came out of a dark alley to approach us in the middle of a suspiciously empty street?
I hoped it was his usual bullshit and bluster, because I would've hated to be right.
Now we're in a mess, two people have appeared out of thin air, Matou looks suddenly worried, Haku's body language is screaming bloody murder and I have no clue what's actually happening. The only thing I know for sure is that I hate being right sometimes.
"Emiya?" I turn towards my friend, who stubbornly remains right in front of me, the implication that she can protect me from something I cannot deal with myself stings a bit but… Well, this situation is weird enough as it is, better not to assume anything. "Forgive my french, but what the flying fuck is going on? Who is that girl? Where did the hot lady come from? Did Matou pay a hooker or something?"
"Later, Ayako-chan. For now…" All thoughts of complaining escape my mind when Haku tenses and… something changes in the air, making the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. "Watch and learn."
"Fuck! Why does everything have to go wrong!" Matou cries out, kicking the floor like a whiny brat. I can't believe I thought he was cool when I first met him. "Rider! Take down that tiny bitch! And don't mess it up again!"
The tall woman that apparently answers to the name of Rider -another point for my 'hooker' theory- charges at the tiny blonde with a couple of nails joined by a chain that she's wielding like daggers. The tiny blonde in badass black armor wielding a red lightsaber. Things go about as well as you'd imagine.
I may practice archery, but that doesn't mean I can tell how a real fight is supposed to go. Still, even I can tell this isn't normal. The tall woman is agile. Fast and nimble to a ridiculous degree, waving and dancing around Saber's attacks with breathtaking grace. Whatever these women are, they aren't human.
Rider easily makes leaps more than twice her own height, standing on things that shouldn't be able to hold her weight and leveraging impossible footholds to swiftly and tri-dimansionally maneuver around the shorter and ground-bound Saber.
And yet, Saber hasn't taken a single step back. She's slower than her rival, maybe, but she's not slow and she more than makes up for the difference with skill and raw power. No matter what Rider tries, Saber's sword is always there to meet her and, every time their weapons clash, the taller woman is sent flying
Is this how a true master fights? It honestly makes me wish I had taken up kendo instead of archery, back when I had the choice. Then again, they're not humans, so it hardly counts.
… Oh, Gods. I hope they're at least not vampires. I don't think I'd survive knowing my life is one of those crappy vampire movies.
"You useless skank!" Matou screams shrilly and… is that a tinge of despair I hear underneath his tantrum? I really need to figure out what's going on, because it really feels like there's a story here. "You are being pushed back again! Do something!"
"Okay, no, this is pathetic." Haku palms her face as she takes a step forward. "Rider is in no condition to put up a fight and I can't keep watching. Saber, please, just… make sure she doesn't get in my way, okay? Remember the plan."
"Roger." The tiny blonde nods without looking away from her own opponent.
There's a pregnant pause in the fight between the two women as the tall one seems to evaluate the situation for a moment before… jumping back to perch on a wall and try to leap above the little blonde to pounce on Haku.
I feel my breath catch as the woman, weapons in hand, gracefully makes the jump above her opponent. Twelve damn feet up into the air, and then a leap across the street. And she would've gotten away with it too, if the blonde hadn't raised a hand towards her and… clenched.
The air distorts around the leaping woman, who suddenly finds herself held mid-air. There's a moment of clear confusion, as she waves her arms and legs around, trying to find purchase. Before she can recover her bearings though, the blonde makes a throwing gesture and the tall woman is sent flying in the opposite direction, hitting the wall with enough force to leave a visible indentation.
Lightsaber, TK powers… Is that girl a fucking jedi?
Then, as if to answer my silent question, the street illuminates with red light. The crackling of thunder and the smell of burnt meat fill the air, causing my stomach to clench with something that's definitely not anticipation. I'm not too proud to admit that's the moment when I take the executive decision of focusing on Haku's confrontation with Matou instead.
"Wha-!" Matou takes a step back, clutching his book to his chest and making a vaguely shooing motion with his other hand. "Don't you get any closer!"
Haku, of course, gets closer.
"Iiih!" I can't see what face she's making but judging by Matou's reaction, it's a scary one. "[Shadow Wave!]"
A burst of purple energy rushes towards Haku out of nowhere. I should probably feel impressed by what seems to be a bona fide magic spell, but between Matou's behaviour and the general mood of the situation… Gods, even his naming sense is pathetic. Nobody must ever know I once found this pathetic creature attractive.
"[Projection]" Haku's answer is calm in contrast, an arm extended as that same sense of wrongness from before comes back tenfold and a glowing sword appears in her hand. "[Dawnbreaker!]"
The sword is swung, and the wave of darkness gets cut in half, the dark mass burning away from the cut. My heart skips a beat, and I suddenly realize how gallant a figure Haku cuts with a magic sword in hand. In the distance, Matou falls on his ass, but I'm a bit preoccupied perving on my friend to pay attention.
Has she alway been that beautiful? I've never paid too much attention to girls, in the romantical sense… I mean sure, I practiced kissing and stuff in middle school, but every girl does that. I stopped before it could give me a troublesome reputation, like everyone else.
But seriously considering a girl as a potential romantic partner for a steady relationship? It never really occurred to me before. Not that I can tie the knot or anything serious like that, of course, my parents would kill me if I don't give them grandbabies at some point but…
Wait, Haku is fucking her brother, right? Emiya-kun is handsome enough, I wouldn't mind if he joined. Maybe they could use a beard for their own relationship? Two siblings living their whole lives together would inevitably cause gossip, but a couple living with one of their siblings is much more socially acceptable and…
… And my brain is getting ahead of me. Focus, Ayaka. Magic and supernatural warriors are the order of the day. Haku just pulled a magic sword out of her ass to fend off a spell casted by Matou fucking Shinji. While hot superhuman women give their best attempts at ruining each other in the background. My attention briefly wanders towards red lightning and well done steaks, but I firmly place it back on Haku.
Apparently one of my best friends is a sword wizard and has been holding out on me. What's next, Tohsaka will be the reincarnation of a Babylonian goddess? On the good side, this is looking more like an urban fantasy story and less like a crappy vampire one by the minute. On the bad side… where was all this crap four years ago, when I was going through my chuunibyou phase? I would've eaten it right up!
Emiya Haku
Shinji tries to flinch back when I finally reach him and take a swing straight at the [Book of the False Attendant]. A high-pitched scream escapes her lips as my [Traced] sword cuts the air inches away from his face. It's only when the sliced parts of the book catch fire that he finally gathers enough wits to throw it away from his body and try to scuttle away on all fours.
Damn, this is pathetic… Why didn't I just impale his skull alongside the book again?
"Rider!" He calls panickedly. "Rider, you useless bitch! Come here and help!"
There's no answer, unless you count how Ecchan's emotions go from cold anger to horrified guilt at his voice. I turn around to check on Medusa's state, a bit worried about this turn of events and what I find is… well.
Ecchan is standing in front of a cratered section of the wall, [Cross Calibur] at hand but clearly at ease. In front of her there's what could generously be called a Servant, curled up into a smoking ball.
Her clothes are burnt tatters, her skin is caked with ash and blood and her usually gorgeous hair is a mess. She's definitely in no state to help Shinji at the moment.
"Well… Crap." I cannot say I don't understand Ecchan's actions. The need to vent fury and frustration at having a precious one threatened is something I understand well. I also get how an ill-timed provocation in those circumstances can lead to a disproportionate retribution, because I've been this close to do the same more than once. But still… "You've gone way overboard here, Ecchan."
"I'm sorry, Master."
At least she looks properly chastised. I shake my head with a sigh, what's done is done. Carefully in case she's just playing possum after all, I approach the smoldering Servant.
"Hey, Rider." Medusa's form twitches on the ground, but doesn't seem to have the strength to even look up. "I know these aren't the best circumstances, but…" I scratch my cheek sheepishly before realizing she's in no condition to pay attention to my body language and pressing onward instead. "We're on Sakura's side too."
That causes a bit more of a reaction. A hand reaches forward, shakily lifting her body just enough for her to orient her face towards me. "Sa… kura?"
"She's waiting for you, you know?" I press on, wincing at the way she twitches when some leftover red lightning arcs through her body. She won't die on me, right? She was fairly weak already, starved for prana and all that. How am I going to explain it to Nii-san if the sexy snek kicks it because of me? "She never wanted you to leave."
"How…" Medusa wheezes out, the effort of looking up to face me apparently the most she can muster. "Do I know…?"
"The [Book of the False Attendant] has been destroyed." I point out, trying not to let my immense relief become too obvious. If she has the energy to feel paranoid, she might pull through this yet. "So your bond with her should've been restored. Why don't you ask her yourself?"
She falls silent again and I'm not good enough at reading people to tell what's going on behind her poker face, but at least doesn't protest anymore. This is, of course, the moment that Ayako-chan chooses to put a hand on my shoulder.
"What the fuck just happened, Haku-san?" There's a wide smile on her face. It's not a nice smile.
"Well…" Her smile widens, and I realize the hand on my shoulder is actually more of a grip. "That's a bit of a long story."
"I reckon." The grip on my shoulder tightens. "But you aren't going to leave me hanging, are you?"
Wow, Ayako-chan can get really scary when she wants to. It's lucky that I was already planning on introducing her to the Moonlit World, because I don't think I could deny her here without someone suffering grievous injury in the process.
Still… I should give her the chance to turn around and forget this, right?
"That depends, Ayako-chan." I do my best to smile in spite of the sudden knot in my throat, wondering how the hell does Nii-san manage to act so cheerful and in control when facing dangerous monsters. "What just happened is the kind of secret society bullshit that you read about in stories and fantasy novels. I can tell you about it, but then you'll be dragged in forever. Or…"
"Or…?" Ayako-chan raises an eyebrow as I trail on, making it very clear I should be careful with what I say next.
Which is a shame, because I doubt she'll like what I have to say next. Unfortunately, I have to say it anyway.
"I can alter your memories." I blurt as fast as I can, hoping she doesn't kill me too much before I can explain everything. "You'd remember a nasty encounter with Shinji, and the street already being… like this when we got here. You won't know the truth, but you'll be reasonably safe from all this craziness. Most mundane people go through their lives without ever coming across the Moonlit World."
Smile gone from her lips, she seriously considers things for exactly five seconds.
"… Fuck it, I want the truth."
"You know I'm not supposed to do this, right?" I sigh defeatedly when she makes the predictable choice. "My allies won't complain, but any random magi you cross paths with will erase your memories without asking. Assuming they don't use you as research ingredients."
"More the reason to know." Ayako grins again, putting her hands behind her head and falling into a carefree walk by my side as I start moving back to base. "Apparently I've stumbled into the good guys, best to milk it for what it's worth."
"Ehehe…" I chuckle uncomfortable, but not for the reasons she thinks. Us the 'good guys'? Sure, Nii-chan is a teddy bear and everyone else involved in this mess is definitely worse, but… "I can tell you everything once we get back to base, it's a bit of a long story and we have a wounded to care of."
I nod at Ecchan, who takes Medusa's form in her arms before astralizing the two of them. In other circumstances, I'd be amused at how ridiculous it looks for Ecchan's tiny form to carry the tall Medusa around like she weighs nothing. As things stand, I'm just glad they can astralize at all, and there won't be a need to sneak the two of them half across the city looking like that.
Before I can actually start walking, Ayako stop me again.
"Screw that, we can talk and walk. You still owe me six days of footing the bill for my sweets, by the way."
"Okay, okay! Geez, it's not like I'm going to run away or anything..." If anything, her smile grows wider at my whining. I don't like that smile. "First of all, you need to know that..."
Wait a minute! Where's… I look around, suddenly noticing the pool of smelly water where Shinji fell on his ass and, most notably, the lack of the piss-stained cockroach to finish the picture. Damn! We got too distracted with Medusa and Ayako, he got away!
Should I track him? Send Ecchan after him? But Medusa needs to get back to Sakura and Medea ASAP! Is Shinji going to survive again by no merit of his own? Why didn't I just impale his skull alongside the book when I had the chance?
'I got you covered, Haku-chan.' Medea's voice interrupts my panicking before I can reach a decision. 'Focus on bringing Medusa-chan back safely and leave the little shit to me.'
There's something unsettling about Medea's cheerful tone of voice and I almost pity the bastard. It's a shame that Ecchan won't have the chance to off him herself, but I don't think we'll need to worry about Shinji ever again.
"As I was saying..." I turn my attention back towards Ayako, restarting my explanation and idly wondering whether Medea will record whatever it is she's planning on doing. "Humanity is much older than what modern science would claim..."
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