章 2: Why not ?

Soooo, I have been thinking, like, a lot.

Tom: "God, please make these headaches stop."

Sylla: "You quite literally ARE God, dear stupid husband."

Tom "Oh...right..." It's at that moment that I knew for certain that I needed to do something to alleviate my boredom. "That's it !" I said. "I just had a wonderful idea !"

Sylla: "My, my... that is quite the rare occasion."

Tom: "Are you going to insult me everytime I say something ? *sweatdrop* You know how these mortals on earth have games, animes, novels and TV series ?"

Sylla: "I know where you are going with this but aren't we forgetting one teensy-weensy but ever so crucial little tiny detail ?"

Tom: "You did not just quote a disney villain..."

Sylla: "I'm afraid I did just that. But back to you. Who will do the paperwork if you go on holiday ?"

Now comes the dangerous part of my master plan...

Tom: "Ikindofhopedyouwouldtakeoverformeplease ?"

Oh boy, that look in her eyes tells me nothing good is about to happen to my poor abused old soul. You ever felt like a small earthworm with a hawk fixing his hungry gaze on you ? You know...like a fish on a chopping board, just worse...? My heart rate was picking up in speed every second until she finally deflates and levels her tired eyes at me.

Sylla: "Maybe you're right... You have been diligently working lately. So why not ?"

Allow me to curse....just this once. WTF !!!

Tom: "Sylla are you okay ?! Are you ill ?! Doctor ! Doctor ! It's an emergency !

Sylla: "..."

Doctor (temp): "Were is the patient ?! What is her condition ?"

Tom: "It's...It's Sylla Doc. She said I was right !

Doctor (temp): "It's a lot worse than what I thought..."

I was so engrossed in our theatrics that I didn't see Sylla slowly creeping behind me with a smile so sugary it could give anyone cavities on sight.

Sylla: "Are you two done ?"

We fearfully nodded our heads like broken machines while huddled together. She then takes two steps forward and is now towering above us.

Sylla: "Good. First, we are gods so there are no 'doctors' here. Second, If you two imbeciles don't stop that stupid charade, I will make sure your future progeny goes on a trip down your esophagus. Are we clear ?"

Are we gods supposed to take this kind of abuse quietly ?! How dare Sylla treat me, and the doc (temp), like that ?! We of course gave the only logical response to such a display of blatant violence !

Both imbeciles: "Sir, yes sir !" we said standing at attention

Sylla: "As I was saying... I will allow you to go on vacation. But I have a few conditions."

I knew it would never be that easy. What will she have me do ? Save the world with a toothpick ? Solve world-hunger ? Peacfully reform every criminal ?

"My condition is for you to not come back for the next 3,000,000 years."

Tom: "That's it ? No saving the world with a toothpick ?"

Cue an epic eye roll from my lovely (temp) wife.

Sylla: "You will of course have restrictions on your powers. We don't want the other worlds to be too boring for you. You will have to earn your strenght through good old-fashioned practice."

Tom: "Can I get a System, please, my lovely, beautiful and smart wife ?"

Sylla: "Eh... why not ?"

Who said flattery gets you nowhere ? Come here and let us discuss life together.