章 22: I Understand
The next day comes. They would be going back to Kiri in a few hours or so just before afternoon.
Shou remembered he should at least say goodbye to Naruto. But he don't know where he lives though.
He walked around to see the village sceneries one last time while looking for someone who knows Naruto.
The villagers are mostly curious seeing the foreign ninja symbol. They assumed he's here for the Chunin exam going on next week.
"Oh! Sakura-chan!". Shou is happy to see Sakura. It seems she's buying groceries with her parents.
'Eh? Shou-san!'.
Sakura is surprised seeing Shou in Konoha. Kirigakure shouldn't be joining the Chunin exam so why is he here?
'Sakura, this person is so cute. Who is this?'. Her mom whispered to Sakura pestering her.
"Mom, let me talk to him for a second".
Sakura went to a different corner.
Shou briefly said why he's here, on a diplomatic mission. He told her he happens to meet Naruto yesterday and the day before as well.
'We are leaving today actually. So I want to goodbye to him. Can I know where he lives?'.
"Oh! Sure. I can lead you to his place. But Naruto is for sure sleeping at this time. He is not that reliable". Sakura lamented the times she needs to ring his doorbell as it's always him who's late when they planned to do missions together.
Sakura leave her parents for awhile to lead Shou to Naruto's place.
"Thank you Sakura-san".
'No problem. I will go first. My parents are waiting'.
"Alright". Sakura is a polite girl actually. It's just with Naruto that she often bully him physically.
As she left, Shou ranged the house two times, waiting for response. A minute passed with no one responding.
Well, maybe Naruto is really asleep.
Oh. He's not.
The door is opened, Naruto is wiping his eye and still has pajamas on.
"Eh? Shou-chan...".
'Heyy'. Shou just smiled a little and waved at him.
"Come in!". Naruto quickly invited him in.
'Sorry for disturbing your sleep Naruto'.
"No no. I am awake-dattebayo!". Naruto says with spirit.
Shou looks around his house. It's a small apartment he lived in for years. It's a little messy here and there, few plates in the sink unwashed it seems. A large plastic bag on the corner of the room filled with trash. He didn't expect guests.
'Naruto-kun, we are going back to Kirigakure in an hour to two. I just want to say goodbye to you'.
"Oh...". Naruto looks visibly sad.
'I wish we can meet again someday'.
"Nn. We will meet again-dattebayo!".
Shou laughed a little hearing that word.
'I will take my leave. You can continue your sleep'. Shou said jokingly, stood and turned around.
"Shou...".
Shou turned to hear what Naruto has to say.
"When will you visit again?". Naruto had a little difficulty to ask that.
Shou thought about it.
'Mmm... It's difficult to say... Unless I have a reason I cannot visit your village freely'.
"Why?".
'Well, Kirigakure is busy and they need manpower... They won't let me out of the village easily for now, unless I am out on a mission. And our village aren't that friendly with each other yet so I can't enter your village freely. They would, suspect me of... things...". As in, being a spy, or having hidden intentions of getting close to the jinchuriki ect. Shou try to explain why its complicated than it seems. It's luck that he happens to be sent on a diplomatic mission here.
"Oh... I see". Naruto don't really understand the reasons on why he can't visit often but he just nods.
'I am sure some day I can visit again. I will let you know if I am coming alright? Bye Naruto'. Shou left shortly after, closing the door.
Naruto felt empty once he left. He didn't even serve him any food while he's here as guest. Well, he don't have much in his house anyways. He wanted to tell him to stay a little longer, but the words stuck him his throat. He never asked anyone that, and he never had at any point wished for anyone to stay.
Naruto quickly wash his face and change his cloth. He wants to see him off.
"Hmm? Is that Naruto?". Shou was on the way back to his temporary residence but he felt the presence coming at him, seemingly running even.
'Shou-chan! I want to see you off!'.
Shou turned his head to confirm it. He just smiled a little seeing him running.
"Thank you. You are really nice. We are going in an hour or two... You should stay at my place for awhile till then. Oh right, have you had breakfast? We had some pancakes".
'Pancakes? Whats that'.
"Mmm. I am not sure. Pancake is pancake Naruto". Shou can't describe it.
...
They walked silently to his Shou's place.
...
"Shou-chan...".
'Yes?'.
"Why are you nice to me?".
Shou stopped his step, quite confused at this question. He turned his head to see Naruto was a little, down.
'Why wouldn't I? You are a nice person. Of course I would be nice to you'.
Maybe Naruto's energy may come off as annoying for some but he don't mind it so there's really nothing that would make him not nice to him.
"No... I mean...". It's really difficult for him to say that's not what he meant.
'You treat me really kind... unlike others...'
Shou is quiet for a moment. He's not sure what to say. He means, those 'others' are being unreasonable to treat him the way they did.
'You know... Shou-chan, I told you I had a monster in me before... They called me a monster... many hated me and always avoided me. The thing in me, killed many people... Like Iruka-sensei parents...'.
Naruto, that's a village secret don't just tell anyone (*_*) Shou thought while listening. He's also worried the ANBU somehow hear what he had said. That would be really bad.
"Naruto-kun... Let's talk later alright. Let's get to my place first".
...
'Nn...'. Naruto felt his heart anxious. That Shou would hate him because of the thing inside him. He remembers those gazes that looks fearful, that filled with hate and disgust towards him. He still felt those gazes on him each time he walked along the streets. What if Shou would see him that way if he knew? And the right thing is to simply hide it then, so Shou would always treat him as a friend. But, he just, wished someone could see him pass he monster inside him even when they know about it.
They finally reached their Shou's temporarily residence.
'Naruto-kun, you are here again today. We still had some pancakes if you want them'. Haku smiled seeing him visit.
Chojuro is still asleep in his bed, not a care in this world. They probably should wake him up soon.
Shou plates the pancakes and poured some honey to it and went to his bedroom.
"Come in".
Naruto followed.
Shou closed the door because he really don't want any ANBU figures out Naruto had revealed a village secret to him. The consequences, oh he had a headache. Mei would had a headache aswell.
"Naruto, sit here. And eat this first".
He sat down next Shou and silently eat the pancake, while feeling anxious inside.
'Naruto. You said, you have a monster in you, right?'.
Naruto is silent for awhile. He place the plate down.
... He can't continue speaking. Being reminded of it hurts his heart. He had suppressed it for so long, and even forgot about it himself. Being blamed for something he never does, being hated for things that he never asked for, it really hurts. Everyone hates him for something he never had anything to do with. It's so cruel...
...
Shou sees Naruto can't even look at him anymore. His eyes are looking down the floor.
He sees his eyes were on the verge of spilling water.
"Naruto-kun...".
Seeing him like this breaks his heart. To think, he still is affected by what he had been through.
Since Naruto can't speak, Shou decides to say something first.
"I know you have a monster in you, but, you aren't a monster. You are a kind person, Naruto. I can see that you know?".
Naruto is quiet hearing it.
No. Shou doesn't know. How could he possibly know? He can't possibly know anything. He's just saying things to comfort him... He don't know, that 9 tails killed many people. It destroyed the village. It killed Iruka-sensei parents. The monster is a real monster and everyone had seen him as one. Shou won't understand what he's talking about.
'You don't get it... you would hate me too if you really knows...'. The words stuck again.
He wants to tell Shou everything, but at the same time he don't want to.
Silence prevails for seconds.
This is going nowhere...
Shou gives in a little. His heart felt sad seeing him like this. He suppose, he can let him know he knows what he's talking about.
"Naruto... The monster in you, I know it's the 9 tails".
Naruto opened his eyes wider, not expecting Shou to know what it is exactly. He felt his heart stopped for a moment.
"I heard the stories. How your village was destroyed. And many people lost their lives. And, I see the way others look at you when you tour us around...".
"But Naruto, I won't ever hate you. Never. You are you. You are not the monster they say you are. You never deserved to be treated the way they treated you".
"I know, everyone has always avoided you. They told others to stay away from you. They chased you away. They gave you that look... I know what you went through. It must have been lonely. It must have been hurt for you".
"I understand. And despite everything, despite what people may say, despite the monster in you, you are my friend. I will never hate you, Naruto".
Hearing those words, Naruto can't help it but broke down. All those time, being lonely, feeling ostracized, isolated, hated, those things he suppressed surfaced all at once.
He cried really hard. Sobbing.
Haku even hears the occasion and keep his distance away to respect their privacy. He felt a little sad hearing such cries.
Seeing Naruto broke down like this, he felt his heart feels really sad.
He really went through a lot doesn't he...
Shou decides to gives him a hug. He can feel Naruto is startled a little from it.
No one has hugged him. Naruto don't even know it feels warm like this.
Shou pats his back, letting him cry it all out.
"It hurts a lot right...". Shou stroke his back, empathizing with him.
Naruto had lost his words, choking. His chest felt so tight he felt he can't breath, gasping for air while crying.
He really needs a hug for such a long time. Shou lets him cry under his hug, giving him the proper care he never gets.
After minutes, he finally stops sobbing.
Shou let go of his arms and went to take some tissues from the desk.
"Here...".
Naruto took it and wiped his face. It's quite embarrassing.
...
"Hey... Lie down here...". Shou knows well the heavy feelings one's get. He had experienced it himself after all... And he can feel it from him.
Naruto complied and lied down, facing away from Shou.
Shou taps his back gently, letting him know he cares.
A minute passed, and it seems Naruto had closed his eyes front the emotional drain having expressing all of his feelings.
"Naruto... You know... Even the monster in you is not a monster... He had his own feelings aswell. He went through a lot like you did, and yet, no one tries to see his feelings...".
"Maybe, one day, you could meet and understand him. You two have a lot in common...". Shou does not want Naruto to hate Kurama for being inside him and had to add that part in case he blamed Kurama for everything. They are both victims. Kurama, and all tailed beasts really, were made prisoner and used as weapons. Hagoromo never wanted this for them initially.
Kurama inside Naruto opened his eyes hearing the sentences. He furrowed his eyebrows. He don't want to admit it, but those words, it touched him. And more importantly, how did he know...? That kid...
He never thought there would be another person who could see him besides Hagoromo. He was trapped and used as a weapon over and over again after Hagoromo passed away. And that had caused him to hate humans very much. But hearing Shou's words, a part of that hatred subsided a little. But, even if someone is kind enough to know his own pain, he is ultimately still trapped here. There's no point in it in the end, he thought.
Naruto don't really understand what Shou meant. He never even met the so called monster in him yet, he just knows it's in him and what it had done.
Shou stayed with Naruto, giving him company.
Time passes by in silence. Naruto does not want to move, and wished he could stay here like this.
Eventually Haku knocked the door, wanting to let Shou know it's time to leave.
He opened the door a little, seeing Shou sitting over there next to Naruto comforting him.
"Shou, it's time to leave".
Shou nods.
'Naruto... We are about to leave... You awake?'.
He opened his eyes and sat up sluggishly. He looked to the side, feeling a little embarassed to look at anyone.
Shou went to wash the plate left at on the desk quickly and pack the little things into his backpack.
Naruto stood at the door, eventually following everyone out of the house.
They walked together until towards the entrance of Konoha.
Chojuro went to Shou's side,
"Was he crying? What happened?". He whispered to ask.
Shou rolled his eyes.
'None of your business. Can't you be more sensible??'.
Chojuro is speechless and felt called out. Haku remained quiet at the side, feeling a little sad just from seeing Naruto.
The ANBUs watching wonders what could make this obnoxious loud kid to be like this but couldn't care less afterwards.
The reached the exit gates, and it's time for them to part ways.
'Naruto. Farewell. Oh and good luck on your Chunin exam. Ganbatte!'.
Shou and Haku waved at him saying their goodbyes.
"Mm! Goodbye!". Naruto waved his hands as he watched them leaves. He finally smiled a little as he waves his hand.
They moved further and further away, until they are out of his sight.
Can't you stay longer...?
His inner child called out to Shou, but he knows Shou can't stay.
Just as he thought he had someone that could accept everything about him, even the monster inside him, that person had left.
As he walks back to his home, he felt a sense of loneliness in him. He looks forward to the street, seeing some passersby. Everyone quickly avoided him, as if he's a plague like always.
But, Naruto don't feel hurt anymore by such thing. After all, he is him. And others may not see it, but at least Shou did. Iruka-sensei also sees him as himself.
A little smile carved on his face knowing there is someone who truly understands him. Remembering Shou's words, he held his head high, walking proudly because he is Uzumaki Naruto! The one who will be the Hokage! Shou sees him, and he believed him, and so he will let everyone knows they were wrong for looking down on him.
As he walked, he suddenly passed by Sasuke.
Sasuke looked at him with furrowed eyebrows seeing the baggy eyes.
"Heh. Were you crying?". Sasuke smirked a little seeing him. He did sees him with Shou and Haku but it's kinda too late to greet them. He's too busy training to not notice they visited until today. He had a hidden care to know whats going on with him. He just, don't have the courage to ask.
'N-no! I didn't! Damn you Sasuke!'. Naruto feels really embarassed. He had his pride too.
"Heh. You better train instead of crying if you want to get us through Chunin exam. You would hold us back like this".
'Grr... I won't hold any of you back! No, I will surpass and carry everyone through! Heh. Just you wait Sasuke!'.
"Heh. Can't wait to see you try".
'Hmph!'.
Naruto walked away and start to plan his next training. He will let Sasuke know how strong he is! He definitely won't let the team down!
Sasuke appearance gives Naruto his competitive spirit.
Sasuke turned his head back to see Naruto leaving. He was secretly glad Naruto seems spirited despite those baggy eyes.
***
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