章 8: Chapter 8
It was on the third day that Snape woke up from the healing sleep. It was just before lunch time and Harry had just been wandering in and around the small cottage thinking in a desultory manner of making lunch and had come to check up on Snape before going to wander around the cottage restlessly yet again.
He was very worried as Snape had still to open his eyes and although McGonagall had told him Snape was in a healing coma, Harry had been tying him self into knots about hurting Snape so badly, thinking all kinds of things and clutching his hair and putting his face into his hands in despair and unable to concentrate even for a little while all this time.
Harry walked around a few times and then came back to sit with Snape once more and ten minutes later he was once again about to get up to go to the kitchen to make lunch, when he saw Snape moving slightly and groaning in pain. Harry's heart jumped in joy as he went at once to the small table by the bed and checked to see if the healing potions and pepper up potions were all in place and waited for Snape to regain consciousness fully and recognize him.
Snape groaned a lot more before he opened his eyes and looked around hazily trying to get his bearing right. He looked right through Harry two times before he registered Harry's presence as his eyes came around the room third time.
"Potter," he rasped, "what the hell did you do?"
"I am very sorry Sir. I never meant to hurt you. I only cast the 'Protego' and you went and crashed into the wall. But not to worry Sir, professor McGonagall came here two days ago and checked on you and said everything was fine and you were in a healing sleep." Harry replied in a hurried tone, wanting to give all the facts before Snape would get out of bed and kill him.
Snape stared at Harry as Harry galvanized into action and started taking the various potion vials and opened them and brought the first one to Snape and held it close to him. "Healing Draught Sir, from your lab below."
Snape tried to get up to drink it and found that his entire body was so sore that he groaned again. Harry hastened to help him and held him gently and poured the vial into Snape's mouth silently and banishing the empty vial, summoned another one and plucking it gave that to Snape as well. Two more potions and half an hour later Snape felt much better and helped by Harry was able to sit up in bed.
Harry excused himself and taking the empty vials ran out of the room, relieved Snape had not hexed him or ordered him to call McGonagall and sent him with her to be tutored by other members of the Order.
While Snape was hateful, Harry at least knew where he stood with that man and he also knew Snape would never sugar coat anything and would never lie to him. Harry felt that he preferred this treatment way better than the one where he was fed lies and falsehoods all in the name of the greater good.
Harry went to the kitchen and set the cauldron on the stove and started cooking. Soon there was an aroma that was mouth watering and Harry removed the stew and pouring a good amount of it into a bowl, left the rest under a warming charm for him to eat later and ran back to Snape's bedroom.
As Harry entered Snape was trying to stand up and Harry went to the table and placed the bowl on it, cast another warming charm and went to Snape.
"Sir," Harry protested, "you are not supposed to get up just yet."
"Potter, do not be silly, I need to use the bathroom. Unless you have other suggestions?" he glared at Harry who blanched at the other suggestions that probably translated into bed pans and the like and then went red with embarrassment.
"Sorry Sir," he replied in a subdued voice and went to assist Snape. Harry put an arm on Snape's waist and slowly helped him get up. Snape's face crunched up in pain and was sweating heavily. Harry thought for a minute as Snape stood there panting with the effort of standing up even with Harry's help and suddenly Snape yelped a little as he was being leviated off the floor.
"Potter," he asked Harry in a strangulated voice, "pray tell me what in Merlin's name are you doing?"
"Leviating you Sir and I will take you to the bathroom like this. It will be easier than walking for now."
Harry carefully leviated Snape into the bathroom and slowly set Snape on the floor holding him with his other hand all the while. Once he made sure Snape was steady, he went out and waited by the door for Snape to finish his business.
Snape called out to Harry after a while and when Harry went in Snape was looking slightly blue with the effort he had made and was sweating heavily. Harry wasted no time and leviating Snape he returned to the bedroom and put him down gently on the bed. Harry then wiped the sweat from Snape's face and body and slowly shifted him into a sitting position, "Potter, get me some water."
Harry conjured a glass of water and put the stew bowl on the table and so did not see the frown Snape sported on his face for a second as he saw Harry effortlessly conjure a glass of water that was very easily seventh year stuff.
Harry held the water to Snape's mouth as Snape's hands trembled so much that he was spilling the water all over him. After Snape drank the water Harry took the bowl of stew and started feeding Snape gently, feeling very guilty that Snape was in such bad shape that he could not even hold a glass of water properly.
Harry knew that Snape would be fine in another day but the damage his power when not controlled could unleash still scared him even after three days. He knew when Dumbledore came to know of this, it would only reinforce his opinion of killing Harry.
Snape had a strange look on his face as Harry fed him patiently. He was still mildly shaking with the impact of being blown away and the raw power he had witnessed truly scared him. More than the spell, it was the sheer magic of Harry that had created so much damage in him. Harry's unconscious desire to prevent Snape from probing further had led to the uncoiling of his magic that was still affecting him.
He had been out cold for two whole days and he was sure he would need at least another day in bed before he could move around. What kind of raw power was that? Snape sighed as his buzzing head was unable to understand anything at all.
Snape tried his best to think deeply as he swallowed mechanically what Harry fed him, thinking of the memory that had made Harry react in such a manner. He began to analyze and found his head aching badly and he gave it up as a bad job in disgust and relaxed fully as Harry finished feeding him and grimaced at the thought of having a bloody Potter feed him and take him to the bathroom of all places.
This was what would manifest as his greatest fear from now on when he came face to face with the dementors, Snape thought even as another part of his brain that was pure mush he told himself sternly, felt nice? Damn it he did not do nice, that would haunt him forever as well he felt as he scowled at that stupid part of him that felt so good to be taken care of when he was just not able to help him self.
All this time whenever Snape had been under the cruciatus or under any curse Voldemort would throw, he would use his portkey after he had dragged himself outside the wards and fall in a special bed that was charmed to receive him and Poppy would treat him and he would begin his duties as soon as possible. For the first time in so many years Snape had someone who took this kind of care and even fed him.
Snape was torn in two as he wanted to sneer at himself for being so pathetic that he was glad to have even Potter attend on him, while the other was telling him that maybe what Minerva and Molly had said the other day had a point and Potter was like this only with him as he had started the 'Potter is stupid like his father and dog father' fight in his very first potions class.
Snape shook his head to clear it and obediently swallowed a sleeping potion that Potter who had been looking at him with increasing concern said would help and went to sleep promising him self that he would think rationally when he woke up later.
Snape slept peacefully all through the day and night and woke up very early in the morning to find Harry was sleeping right next to him in a camp bed he had obviously conjured. So Harry had been sleeping here for the last three days. Snape felt something warm moving inside him and scowled.
He was feeling much better. The trembling had stopped completely and only the soreness remained. A strange feeling that all his scowls could not banish came over him as he saw Harry sleeping so peacefully.
As he continued to look at Harry his mind started working with the usual amount of alertness and intelligence as ever. Why had Harry's magic reacted so violently? Usually this type of magic was released only when there was extreme anger or fear or being cornered by enemies and where you didn't have a choice of any kind except to have to fight your way out. Potter knew that what Snape was conducting were lessons on Occlumency and he was supposed to learn to shield his mind not attack with raw magic.
The power of Harry's magic was more than what he had ever seen, not even Dumbledore's or Voldemort's had been able to exude such raw magic or power. He frowned as he looked at the sadness in Harry's face even as he was sleeping; maybe the boy was dreaming about Black.
What had it been, the memory that had made Harry so desperate to throw his magic at Snape and going by what Harry had said, he had not even felt the magic leave him or feel tired or anything really. That was even more incredible. Snape's brows furrowed deep as he thought of the last thing he had seen in Potter's mind before he had smashed against the wall.
His eyes widened as he remembered what he had seen and what Ron Weasley had read out to his sister. His mouth thinned in a determined way and he summoned his wand and slowly got out of bed. He washed and feeling clean and fresh, he threw a pinch of the floo powder and poked his head into the fire. McGonagall was sleeping, the thick curtains drawn around her bed tightly, and he called out softly to her.
She peeped out of the curtains all disoriented and then seeing Snape became alert quickly. "Give me a few minutes and I will come there." She said softly, just waiting for Snape to withdraw his head before jumping out of bed and racing away to the bathroom. In fifteen minutes, she was in Snape's bedroom and he placed a finger on her lips and took her to the drawing room.
"Severus how have you been? Harry told me you had awakened yesterday but went back to sleep and you did sound all right, only tired. What in the name of Merlin happened between you and Harry? Harry was so scared and said a shield charm of all things hurt you." She asked him the moment they stepped into the drawing room concern in her voice.
"I am fine Minerva. How much time do you have?"
"As much time as you need for me to stay." She replied promptly.
Snape made both of them tea, and with biscuits they went to the sofas and sat down. Snape cast a few privacy spells and turned to McGonagall.
"I was thrown with a surge of magic against the wall that was definitely not caused by a shield charm. Oh Potter cast the Protego all right, but what hurt me was his raw magic, Minerva. I have not seen such power in my life in anybody. Not Albus and certainly not the Dark Lord."
McGonagall gaped at him. "What are you trying to say Severus? I am unable to comprehend."
"There was so much power in him, Minerva. To add to that I saw him conjure a glass of water from thin air, not summon it from the kitchen but conjure it. Since he is not Granger or a Ravenclaw and until now he has not been anything other than mediocre, I was astounded at that to say the least. Another thing that shocks me is the fact that Potter did not even get tired or exhausted after releasing this type of magic. That shocks me greatly as well."
McGonagall was perplexed, "Severus, Harry knew that all you were doing was teaching him Occlumency as he never said a word to me about you trying to be all unfair to him," as Snape looked indignant and opened his mouth to tell her off, "wait, what I am so poorly trying to explain is the fact that Harry knew you were not doing anything other than Occlumency, so why should he feel so threatened? After all you have seen all of his memories except the Department of Mysteries and Sirius falling into the veil and that is not reason enough for his magic to surge like this."
Snape was silent for sometime as if he was deciding something in his mind and then he quietly turned to McGonagall and said very softly even though they were surrounded by privacy spells and no one could hear them.
"I did see something Minerva. I saw Fawkes flash in with a letter to Ron Weasley and his sister and maybe Granger, I do not know. I saw Weasley read about an Order meeting at half past ten and then I knew no more."
McGonagall's eyes had widened impossibly as she stared at Snape her mouth hanging open as she tried to take in what he had just said. Weasley and his sister were getting letters to attend the Order meeting? What was happening here?
"I do not really think Granger was in this as Potter has been very friendly to her, but if you will think back you will realize that he and Granger did not seem to be missing the other member of their trio. I can believe it if Potter gets letters from Albus but Weasley and sister? All of this sounds impossible and improbable Minerva and I am at a loss to understand." Snape finished and he sat back and slowly sipped his tea looking at his colleague and giving her the time to take all this in.
Both of them sat there trying to make sense of just why Albus should be writing letters to Ron Weasley. "I am sure Molly did not know Severus." McGonagall said at last as Snape nodded his head in agreement.
Before Snape could say anything more there was a noise behind him and he turned to see Harry walking out looking very anxious and seeing him and McGonagall, his expression relaxed and Snape once again felt a surge of emotion in his chest that he irritably pushed down all the while looking at Harry steadily.
"Hello professor," he said looking at McGonagall and then turning to Snape, "Sir, how are you? Sorry," he blushed, "I over slept. Are you feeling all right?"
"Yes Potter. Now kindly refresh yourself and comeback here." Harry did not say another word. He went to his trunk and took out fresh clothes and went into the bathroom and came out in ten minutes to find McGonagall and Snape still talking to each other in low tones.
Harry's heart had sunk into his shoes as he saw his Head of House. So Snape was going to use her to punish him. Well, at least she would be fair and not tell him to do absurd things like Snape would.
Snape silently handed him a cup of tea and Harry unthinkingly conjured up a chair for himself as he took the cup of tea not noticing the look Snape and McGonagall shared as he was thinking rather morbidly about how Snape of all people was handing him a cup of tea.
He supposed that Snape would want him fed and watered before bringing down the axe on him. Well he would take anything and he was already subduing his pride telling it sternly any punishment would be better than going to Grimmauld Place or getting trained by Remus or Moody or Dumbledore himself.
Harry was startled out of his thoughts by Snape who addressed him first. "Potter what were my injuries and how did you treat them?"
Harry gulped and looked down at his shoes as he told Snape about how extensively he had hurt himself and what Harry had done. Snape's eyes had narrowed as Harry stumbled along mumbling about what had happened and Snape's eyes as well as McGonagall's widened as Harry told them how he had removed the bones entirely and then given skelegrow and how he had prepared the NEWT level potion and had fed it to him.
Both Snape and McGonagall looked at each other as Harry finished and looked up at last his face red with fear and embarrassment.
"Sir I will take any punishment you give me. I never meant to harm you or hurt you. I really don't know why my Protego was so strong all of a sudden. I only meant to push you out of my mind" Harry finished very defensively looking down once again.
There was no response for a long time and Harry frowned as he looked up slightly to see both McGonagall and Snape looking at him. He blushed and looked back at them with an air of bravado.
"I presume you do not want me to go to the Headmaster with this?" Snape asked at last. Harry's answer to this question would set the trend for the rest of the questions he had. He had been thinking furiously and he had come to the conclusion that Harry Potter did not like the Headmaster for more than one reason if especially Albus was sending letters to Weasley to attend Order meetings that Harry and Hermione were not privy to.
Harry's reaction was startling to both Snape and McGonagall. He nodded furiously. "I will do anything you say Sir, but I don't want go anywhere. I... I will behave and be good Sir, please believe me. It was a mistake. I never meant to hurt you." Harry was desperate but he really did not have a choice. If Snape dragged him off to Dumbledore Harry knew he would not be able to control himself and it would be disastrous.
Snape stared at Harry as did McGonagall. Then Snape glanced at her just for a second and looked at Harry, who was staring at him with wide eyes full of desperation.
"I will do so Potter on one condition." Snape started softly.
"Yes Sir." Harry nodded his head.
Snape looked at Harry and softly asked him watching his reaction closely as was McGonagall, "then you will tell us why Weasley and his sister were reading an invitation to the Order meeting that was held in the School a day before they left. In fact I wish to see it." Snape flicked his wand and a beautiful pensieve came right into his hands.
Harry sat there unmoving totally flabbergasted and horrified to the core. So Snape had seen it and had also heard Ron reading the letter. Harry went pale and he just sat there still and unable to think a way out of this. He wished Hermione could be here, she would know what to do but now he was caught up here alone with Snape and McGonagall both of them strict and very demanding people.
Harry sat there for a very long time not saying a word. After it looked as if Harry would continue to sit and not say a word, Snape cleared his throat softly, "Potter the professor has to leave. When she does what she will tell the Headmaster will depend," Snape stopped as Harry was already removing the memories from his forehead.
Again Snape looked at McGonagall. Harry was not to know how to do this. He looked back at Harry who had now finished putting the memories into the basin. He had removed bits and pieces of many memories and had placed them in to the basin, knowing that the memories would play out from the first one he had placed to the last. Harry put the last memory into the basin and looked up at Snape and McGonagall.
"Sir all I want from both of you is an assurance that you will never say a word of what you see in here to anyone without my consent, please."
"What if I do not give it Potter?" Snape asked him his eyes gleaming.
"I will fight you and try my best to oblivate you, both of you." Harry told him angrily as he tried hard not to think of what would have happen if Snape or McGonagall were to take this to anyone.
Snape to Harry's surprise did not retort back sharply. "I will make no promises until I have seen what is inside. If it necessitates a promise both professor McGonagall and I will consider it."
Snape did not wait for an answer, but he flicked his wand once and the room became dark and then he tapped the basin and the memories started playing out.
"I was under the invisibility cloak and I had placed a silencing charm on myself because of a first or second year who was very frightened by my footsteps that could be heard, but no one could be seen." Harry told them in stilted tones.
The memory started in the infirmary, where Snape and McGonagall watched Fawkes flash in with a letter that Ron read out aloud; the spells Harry placed on himself to hide his aura and other things; the Order meeting; the meeting that took place after the Order meeting.
McGonagall gasped there, placing her hand over her mouth and Snape drew his breath in sharply, glancing at Harry for a second; then as the memories continued and Snape turned away, Harry going to Snape for the potion; the meetings with Hermione in the Room of Requirement the next day; the Prophecy; their discoveries and Harry's aura; Snape gasped here as he saw Harry's aura as did McGonagall; Harry's foray into Diagon Alley; his meeting with the goblins and ending with the scene with the Order members speaking to Harry and the Grangers at Privet Drive.
The memories ended and Snape and McGonagall sat as still as Harry had a little while before. Harry had shown only brief moments of each of the meetings; the important things they had discussed and done. Not the entire process, even then Snape and McGonagall seemed totally shell shocked and totally stunned.
"Sir, professor, can you at least now promise me that you will not breathe a word about this to anyone." Harry was scared about this silence and he wanted the promise out of the way before McGonagall suddenly decided to leave for Hogwarts and spill everything to Dumbledore.
"I have never been so glad in my life that I have been privy to something like this Potter. While the contents horrify me, and I know you showed this only under duress, nevertheless you may be rest assured that you have me on your side in this horrible war, and I will not only not reveal what you have shown me so far, I will also from now on inform you about all that goes on in the Order and do my best to help you in any way I can and you may be rest assured no will ever dare kill or even think of it you as long as I am alive."
McGonagall was foaming at the mouth as she realized that this boy and Granger had been planning to go it alone, until the goblins offered their hand in friendship. How that Weasley boy and girl could be Gryffindor she did not know, but at that time the memory of a rat came to her and she realized that these two were like Peter.
She felt tears come into her eyes as she thought of all that Harry had sacrificed and all that he had endured until now and even when the odds were against him, even when Dumbledore was planning to kill him and take over his assets, he was still willing to work to defeat Voldemort. That more than anything touched her and moved her from the bottom of her heart.
"Why did not go away Harry? You could in fact I say you must. This ungrateful Wizarding World does not deserve your sacrifice. You have given too much already." McGonagall angrily wiped the tears from her eyes as she looked at the boy she had wanted to raise as hers in the first place.
Harry shrugged as he glanced at Snape who was still silent and staring at Harry with an inscrutable expression on his face. "If I do then the reason my parents' died and the way I managed to off, off, off… Sirius who died for me would be in vain."
McGonagall got up and went to where Harry was sitting and bent down and hugged him gently and awkwardly, but pouring all the comfort she could.
"Sirius falling into the veil is not your fault Harry. It is ours. We never did anything that would have made you think and be a little more cautious, never gave you the information that should have been told to you so many years back. Sirius argued so much at every Order meeting that you should be told about the Prophecy and the mind link, but Albus shut him and all of us saying he wanted you to enjoy your School time without all of this hanging over your head.
"Never regret you went to fight for Sirius. That is what families do. Love each other and fight for each other. Had Sirius known that you were in danger do you really think he would have cared two hoots about his status as a wanted criminal or Albus's advice about not going out? He would have hexed his way to hell and back and got to you. He did just that when he came to the Department of Mysteries to save you. That is what you did as well."
"But he died." Harry's voice came softly; trembling in its grief as he finally said the words that made Sirius a part of the past.
"Yes, he did; that was sad and very unfortunate, but he died for you as you were prepared to and would have died for him. But do you know one thing Harry? He would have lived for you as well. That is what I want you to do. Live for him, and your parents' who gave their lives as did Sirius who gave his life in the hope and knowledge that you will have yours.
"Defeat not only You-Know-Who, but Dumbledore, Moody and the others who think that you should be done away with just because you had the gall and the nerve to do at fifteen months what they cannot dream in their ten lifetimes to come." She held on to Harry who was sitting quietly letting her words of much needed comfort wash over him as he drowned in memories that were very few in his opinion, of Sirius.
At that time a patronus came from Albus who had called for a meeting at Grimmauld Place. She stood up and smiled at Harry slightly, "Well wish me luck. I am off to my new career in spying. I will tell you what happened there Harry. Start the real work with Severus as this holiday here in so much isolation is ideal for learning about all your gifts."
Snape flicked his wand at her as she was about to floo, "de-scenting for Lupin." Was all he said and then she smiled at Harry and left. There was an uncomfortable silence after she left and Snape got up and swiftly started preparing lunch giving Harry the time to calm down after McGonagall's emotional speech. They had missed breakfast and both of them had got up very early.
Soon Snape laid the table and silently gestured to Harry to eat and not waiting for Harry, Snape sat down without much ado and started eating. Harry too, sat down opposite him and wondered how he could ask Snape to tell him personally that he would not reveal anything to Dumbledore and Voldemort as McGonagall seemed to categorically speak for both of them.
He decided to ask Snape as soon as lunch was over
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