章 4: Lala's Date and Summoning Akeno

Lala's incredible curiosity would not be sated by walking around town with you. She asked what felt like hundreds of questions about everything and anything she saw during the trip. She'd drag you into a shop that'd catch her interest and peruse nearly every item they had on display. Keeping up with her was exhausting. At least she seemed to know a little something about social norms on Earth, unlike her early appearances in the manga. You have yet to be stripped naked, nor has she gotten naked herself.

You convinced her to take a break at a nearby café. Her strange outfit drew a few stares, but she was happily shrouded in ignorance and slurping away at a milkshake you ordered for her. Based on your previous questioning of Rias, it was easy to draw the conclusion that Lala was not in love with Rito like she was originally. Instead, she was in love with you.

It's strange that your appearance in a manga and anime could have such a strong effect on them though. There are examples here at home too, of course – everyone loves poking a bit of fun at people who obsessively collect merchandise for their favourite anime character. But love was a different matter. There was a lot more to a real person than what you see in a TV show, a snapshot of their life and personality. Who's to say that the love they feel won't translate into reality when faced with the real thing?

Mitsuru is confident that her machine summons women who genuinely love you, and want to be with you, and it worked with Rias. You have no reason to doubt her. If she wanted to pluck a potential wife for you from amongst the multiverse, she's already proven her capability to do it.

"This is delicious," Lala smiles. "So – I want to get to know my new fiancé!"

"Fiancé?"

"Yep. My Papa is really impatient, and he keeps setting me up with a bunch of meanies! But now that I have you, I don't have to worry about them anymore." You already know this, obviously. Lala is quick to imprint herself on people who show her kindness. The real problem is how she'll react to finding out that Rias has already staked her claim on you, and all the way down your back.

You rub the back of your head, "I don't know if I have time to organise a wedding at the moment… I mean! There's a bunch of aliens trying to invade Earth after all."

Lala tilts her head, "I guess you're right. But don't think you can get away from me forever! I want a big, amazing wedding with all of my friends and family!" Lala continues to elaborate on her future plans for your wedding with little regard for the topic at hand. You sit back and allow her to have her fun for the time being.

Your nice date at the café is not long for this world.

Before Lala can finish explaining how the food will be dispensed by a new gadget she's inventing, a loud crash from nearby causes panic amongst the other patrons. As the dust clears across from you, you witness the arrival of a strange man with blue skin, long white hair, and wearing eccentric armour that reminds you of a high fantasy RPG. He points at you, "Evildoer! Prepare to be smited by my sword!" Suddenly dozens and dozens of foot soldiers pour from the alleyways and leap from the rooftops, surrounding him and forming a defensive formation. They wear chrome masks that hide their true identities and wild various melee weapons.

You and Lala stand from your seats and face down the new threat. "I take it that you're one of those untethered assholes who's trying to take over our planet?"

Lala nods, "That's them! Wow, they even look like they did in the manga…"

The enemy general flicks his fringe away from his eyes, "You are the man who destroyed our scout? We shall see your true strength with our own eyes!" He draws his sword and points it at you, "Now, draw arms and face us! We will decide the fate of your star!"

"Looks like your armour is getting its first test run Lala."

"Roger!"

"Advanced Interdimensional Support and Protection Module Herarmor-Kun! Let's go!" You press the button on the bracelet and feel a jolt of energy run through your body. A glowing blue light envelops your body, when it dissipates a few seconds later you're wearing the armour! A futuristic heads up display highlights your enemies in red for you, and displays your body's condition in the top right corner of your vision.

You don't have time to admire the user interface, one of the blank faced mooks charges at you, his club held high in the air. He swings down hard as you hold up your arm to defend yourself. You feel the impact of the weapon hitting your arm, but no pain. You open your eyes to witness it shatter into pieces on contact! If that had hit you without the armour, who knows what would have happened!

The blue skinned man smirks, "I suppose you aren't such a pushover after all. An impressive suit of armour."

You ball up your fist and swing wildly at your attacker. You are not a trained fighter, the odds of even hitting them are low. The edge of your knuckles brush past their face, barely making contact. The mook tumbles head over heels and through the brick wall to your left, crashing through it in a pile of dust and stone. A glancing blow just blasted him across the street! What kind of satanic thing have Lala and Mitsuru invented?!

His smug smile twitches slightly as one of his men is blown to kingdom come, "G-Gah, I-I underestimated you!" he blusters.

"Woohoo!" Lala cheers, "That's my fiancé!" One of the soldiers attempts to fight her, but she similarly blasts him across the road with a single flail of her devilish tail. "Oh, I'm sorry!" She dashes over to the KO'd henchman and bows her head apologetically.

"Lala, they're trying to kill us."

"Oh! You're right! Mitsuru told me you can summon Sledgehammer-kun by pressing the red button!" You quickly follow her directions and press the other button on the bracelet, reality shatters in front of you, and the Sledgehammer drops from above into your outstretched hands. It's much lighter now that you're wearing the super armour.

A thug tries to take advantage and charges at you. You swing the gun around and point it at his stomach, before pulling the trigger. Without a card inserted it acts as a powerful blaster. A purple ball of fire engulfs him and sends him flying back to his waiting comrades. The enemy commander is infuriated, "That's it! I was going easy on you before, but it seems that my caution was misplaced. Attack!"

Thinking quickly, you open the gun's chamber and eject Rias' card into your hand. "RIAS GREMORY! SHATTERING!" it declares as you slide her card inside and lock it shut. You fire the Sledgehammer again, summoning your red-haired lover from her own dimension. This time she's wearing a casual outfit instead of her school uniform. She deftly dodges a strike from one of the soldiers before blasting him away with a burst of magic.

She turns to face you, tilting her head at the sight of your new armour, "Is that you in there, my cute little boyfriend?"

You bow your head, "Sorry Rias! Looks like we're going to need a hand here." You turn to the left and punch out another of his men, sending him collapsing onto the floor with a thud.

"I should have known that my boyfriend would be popular," she comments jokingly, "Hand off, he's mine!" She summons a blast of crimson lightning and strikes down several foes at the same time, thinning out the numbers significantly. Lala has done her own part and created a veritable pile of defeated bodies at her feet, her tail swipes at them with deadly precision, occasionally firing a laser beam at those too afraid to approach.

"Hey, Rias – how would you feel about me inviting one of your friends to the party?" You pull out Akeno's card and show her.

"Ah! You decided to take my advice? Fufu, the more the merrier, as they say."

You don't hesitate any further, "AKENO HIMEJIMA! SHATTERING!"

Reality is torn asunder, and through the gap emerges a tall, beautiful girl with a long black ponytail and a chest that puts Rias' to shame. Like her leader, she's also wearing casual clothes – the two must have been out somewhere together. What a coincidence.

She whips her head around in confusion, "Ara? President! So this is where you went."

"Akeno, assist me in dispatching these fools."

"Gladly." Akeno glows with a blinding light and transforms into her fetching shrine maiden outfit. Black wings sprout from her back as she flies above the battlefield and holds up one of her arms, "Fufu, this is the end for all of you." You see a glimmer of malice in her purple eyes as she summons a biblical lightning storm to wreak havoc on the area. You barely manage to grab Lala and duck behind a nearby car before you're hit by it.

The noise is deafening. A thick layer of smoke covers the street. You peer from over your vehicular saviour and witness the devastation wrought by Akeno's single attack. All of the remaining soldiers lay in a smoking heap. The commander's jaw is agape, his entire platoon destroyed in moments by a set of four strangers.

"W-What in blue blazes was that?" he demands, "I didn't know they had such strong fighters here! I'm totally underhanded!" A purple portal opens behind him. He steps back and escapes before you can grab him and slap him silly for his bullshit. The rest of the soldiers disappear in a similar manner as some type of automated system recovers their unconscious bodies.

With the threat defeated, you disable the armour and return to your normal clothes. Rias can't help herself from walking over and dragging you into a deep kiss, right in front of Lala and Akeno. You stare deep into her eyes, your heart hammering in your chest, before you realise that you have an audience. You back away and clear your throat, "Uh, sorry Lala."

Lala tilts her head, "Why would you be sorry?"

"This is Rias Gremory, I guess you could say she's my girlfriend."

"Charmed," Rias smiles.

"I should have told you before," you explain. Lala was so insistent that you were her fiancé, and here you are eating another girl's face right in front of her. Akeno, Rias and Lala all seem collectively confused about why you're so embarrassed.

"So?" Lala continues.

"Well, aren't I a two-timing jerk for leading two girls on at the same time?" you roll on.

"Two-timer?" Rias ponders, "What does that mean?"

"Are you okay honey?" Lala says, placing her hand on your head, "You don't have a fever…"

Your phone rings. You answer it in a desperate attempt to salvage the situation, "Mitsuru?"

You hear her place a tool down on the table in the background, "By the way, all of the girls we're summoning come from universes where polygamy is normal. Have fun."

She hangs up.

Gee, thanks Mitsuru.

You turn back to the three girls. "Wait, so none of you have a problem with me dating multiple girls?"

"Why would we?" Lala shrugs.

"My father had two dozen wives before he passed away," Rias explains, "Of course, only my mother was graced with children - as the lady of the house." Akeno sees fit to elaborate no further with her own… family circumstances.

You clutch your head and sigh, "Looks like I have some explaining to do. Oh, and I need to introduce myself to Akeno!"

The tall girl giggles at you, "The President has already told me much about you. You seem like a fine man."

You pull Lala aside and present her to the devil twosome, "This is Lala. She's responsible for creating that armour you just saw."

"Nice to meet you!"

"A pleasure. I take it that she is one of your new wives?" Rias inquires. You blush and try to deny it, but there's no helping it now. Lala had already made her intentions clear to you earlier. You just nod mutely. Rias smiles and turns to Akeno, "Akeno, how would you feel about being his third wife?"

She puts her hands together and smiles, "Ara, a splendid idea President. I would be honoured to share him with you!"

"I feel like a lot of big decisions are being made without me right now."

Rias giggles, "Oh please, as if you would say no to us. A man overflowing with desire is the natural state of things, is it not?"

"Yep! Our fiancé is really manly!" Lala declares, "He was super cool! He fought off all those guys like they were nothing!"

You look back to the vandalised street and freeze, "Uh, maybe we should continue this talk somewhere else before the police show up." The three girls quickly agree and follow you down one of the alleyways to safety.