章 17: Another Debrief
Location: UNSC Forward Operating Base, Avenport, Virek
Date and Time: March 12, 2553 – 1600 Hours
The base feels different now. Every time I walk through the gates, it's like I'm carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. I know the others feel it too—Bravo Fireteam has been quiet since we got back. The ambush in the hills hit us harder than we want to admit.
We made it out. But it was close. Too close.
I sit on the edge of my bunk, staring at my gear as I replay the mission in my head, over and over. I can still hear the gunfire, still see the flashes of light as the URF forces swarmed us. I can still feel the weight of responsibility, pressing down on me like a lead blanket.
This is what it means to lead. Every decision, every move—it's all on me. And if I make the wrong call, someone doesn't make it home.
Santiago walks in, his boots heavy on the floor as he drops his gear in the corner. He's been quiet since the mission, more serious than usual. The easy-going attitude he usually carries with him has been replaced with something else—something harder.
"Hell of a mission, huh?" he mutters, sitting down on the bunk across from me.
I nod, not really knowing what to say. It's not like there are words for what we went through out there. We survived, but it wasn't easy. And I can't shake the feeling that next time? We might not be so lucky.
"You did good, Kowalski," Santiago says after a moment, his voice steady. "You kept us alive."
I exhale, the weight of his words sinking in. "Barely."
"Barely's good enough," he says, giving me a small grin. "We're still here, aren't we?"
His words ease the tension a little, but it's not enough to shake the doubts that have been gnawing at me since we got back. I keep thinking about the ambush, about how close we came to being wiped out. I wonder if I could have done something differently. If I could have seen it coming.
But that's the thing about war—you don't always see it coming. Sometimes, it just hits you. And all you can do is survive.
"Command wants a debrief," Santiago says, standing up and grabbing his gear. "You ready?"
I nod, though the truth is, I'm not. I don't feel ready. But that doesn't matter. There's no time to second-guess yourself in a war zone. You either do the job, or someone else pays for your hesitation.
The debrief is as cold and clinical as always. Gunnery Sergeant Baird sits at the head of the room, her expression unreadable as she listens to our report. Santiago, O'Neill, and I sit across from her, recounting the mission in detail—every shot fired, every movement made.
"We were ambushed," I say, my voice steady. "The URF knew we were coming. They let us take the cache, then hit us when we were vulnerable."
Baird nods, her eyes narrowing slightly as she listens. "You handled the situation well, Corporal. Casualties?"
"None, ma'am," I reply. "But it was close. We were pinned for several minutes before we could break free."
She leans back in her chair, her fingers tapping lightly on the desk. "You're right—it was close. Too close. But you made it out. That's what matters."
I nod, but the tension in my chest doesn't ease. She's right—we made it out. But I can't stop thinking about how close we came to not making it out. How quickly things can turn.
After the debrief, Baird pulls me aside, her expression softer than usual. It's rare to see her like this—usually, she's all business. But today, there's something different in her eyes. Something like concern.
"You did well out there," she says, her voice quieter than before. "But I can see it's weighing on you."
I meet her gaze, unsure how to respond. Of course it's weighing on me. I'm leading the team now. Everything that happens out there is on me.
"I've been where you are, Kowalski," she says after a moment, her voice steady but kind. "I know what it's like to carry that weight. To wonder if every decision you make is the right one."
She pauses, her eyes searching mine. "But you've got what it takes to lead. You've already proven that."
I nod, feeling a strange sense of relief at her words. If Baird believes in me, maybe I can start believing in myself.
Back in the barracks, the squad is starting to unwind. O'Neill is playing cards with Dash, the sound of their laughter cutting through the heavy atmosphere. Santiago is leaning against the wall, his arms crossed as he watches the game.
I sit down on my bunk, the tension in my chest easing slightly as I watch the others. These past few months have been a whirlwind—mission after mission, fight after fight. But somehow, we're still here.
As I look around the room, I realize something. This squad—they're not just soldiers. They're my family. And as long as we're together, we'll make it through whatever comes next.
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