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Golden-Eyed White Wolf: Mine to Protect

章 1: Mate

Leslie's POV:

Today was supposed to be the happiest day of my life—the day I would eagerly find him. But I wasn't eager. I wasn't ready. This was the last place I wanted to be. I had planned to leave after my eighteenth birthday and never look back.

"Please don't scent anyone," I begged my wolf, Elsie.

Elsie hadn't spoken to me for a week, but I could feel her anxiety simmering beneath the surface. I hated school with every fiber of my being. To them, I was the weird girl—the one who couldn't shift. The teasing, the taunts, the beatings, they were relentless. Even the teachers weren't much help, joining in during shifting class, mocking me for what I couldn't do.

Jaden was the worst of them all. The Alpha's son, once my best friend, had become my greatest tormentor after I failed to shift at thirteen. He was the one who spread the word. And with that, the teasing started, the taunts from the Alpha, who eventually declared me invalid after a series of tests. But Elsie was my secret. No one knew of her existence except my mom, who constantly warned me to keep it that way. They knew I could heal and do everything a wolf could—everything except shift.

It was math class, and I prayed with every ounce of my being that no one in that room would be my mate. But the Moon Goddess had other plans. Just as I was about to enter, a scent hit me—earthy soil after the rain, the fragrance of wildflowers, the deep, rich scent of the forest.

"Mate," Elsie cried out, her voice shaking with excitement for the first time in a week.

Panic surged through me, drowning out everything else. This wasn't supposed to happen—not here, not now. I bolted, hoping, praying that whoever it was hadn't scented me yet. I was leaving today, and no mate was going to stop me.

I fled to the forest—my sanctuary, the one place where I could think clearly, where I could convince Elsie that we had to leave, mate or no mate.

"We're leaving without finding our mate, whether you like it or not!" I yelled, desperation choking my words.

"This is my choice as much as yours, and I say we need our mate!" Elsie shouted back, her voice trembling with defiance.

"No, we are not! Don't you remember what they did to us? No so-called mate bond will change that."

"Maybe he'll change when he finds out who we are. Maybe we'll finally have a future here," Elsie whimpered, her hope tugging at my heart.

But I couldn't allow myself to believe in a future here, not after everything I'd endured. My father was proof enough—how could a mate be cruel to his own mate and child? He was the Beta of the pack, admired by everyone, yet he treated my mom and me like dirt beneath his feet. When I confronted my mom, she said it was because she wasn't originally from this pack, that she'd shifted here for her mate. I had asked her if my mate would treat me the same way, and she tried to assure me that mates were supposed to be loving, protective. But that's not what I saw with my parents. I used to wonder if they were mates at all. But my mom insisted Dad had a twisted way of showing love.

Now, knowing my mate was in this hellhole, I knew he'd be just like my father. I couldn't afford to stay. I had to run.

But my sanctuary wasn't as private as I'd thought. I heard giggling—Florence's high-pitched, sugary laugh cutting through the quiet. Panic flared within me. There was nowhere to run. I tried to hide, but they would smell me, I knew they would. Shit!

Jaden and Florence emerged from the trees, wrapped around each other like they couldn't get enough. My heart plummeted.

"Flo…? Wait… wait," Jaden mumbled, pushing her away as he caught my scent. His eyes narrowed. "Come out," he barked.

Fear gripped me, paralyzing me in place. This wasn't how I imagined meeting my mate!*"I said come out!" he roared, his voice laced with the Alpha's command.

Elsie was beside herself, "Mate is here!" she chanted over and over, her excitement palpable. But I cursed the day I was born. I tried to convince myself that maybe—just maybe—his old love for me would rekindle. But as I crept out from the shadows and met his cold, calculating gaze, I knew I was doomed.

I saw mixed emotions on his face: first confusion, then realization, and finally, hatred and anger.

"Don't tell me that's your mate," Florence's whining pierced through the tension, making everything worse. Jaden's face twisted with fury, and he turned to her, his eyes burning with rage. "Leave. Now. And don't utter a word to anyone," he growled, his voice low and dangerous.

After Florence had scurried away, he stood there, his anger still palpable as he glared at me. I knew this was it—the end, the moment of rejection. My heart pounded in my chest as I closed my eyes, bracing myself for the painful words that would shatter my soul. I waited, my breath held tight, but nothing came. Slowly, I opened my eyes and saw Jaden approaching me. His expression was unreadable, and I braced myself for the harsh beating that usually followed his anger when I was near.

But instead of a blow, I felt a soft touch. His palm caressed my left cheek, a gesture so unexpected that it sent a jolt through me. "Why me? Why her?" he muttered, his voice filled with confusion and frustration. Then, with a sudden yank, he grabbed my arm, the electric tingling between us undeniable as he shivered. He began to drag me away, to Goddess knows where, his grip firm and unrelenting.

"This is my end. I should have left yesterday. Why did I wait?" I thought, panic rising within me. But Elsie, my wolf, seemed elated. "Mate touched us. He hasn't rejected us," she kept repeating, her voice filled with hope. I knew better—she was just a hopeful wolf who would soon face reality.

After a lot of begging and him dragging me, I realized where he was taking me, and dread filled my heart. The Alpha's office. The Alpha loathed me, saw me as a curse brought into his pack. He had once told me that he only kept me because of my dad, and that I should never be seen in his presence. Since then, I had avoided him, never attending any pack gatherings. I knew he smelled me when passing by as I hid, but he never acknowledged it. He knew what his pack members did to me but never intervened. Just like my father, I was insignificant to him.

Now, Jaden was dragging me into the pack house. Memories of the last time I was here flooded back. Mom was helping prepare the Luna's birthday party and had called me to help out. I was fifteen then, eager to please. The Luna had claimed she craved wild berries from the forest, and my mom, desperate to fit in, volunteered to get them, leaving me alone. Not knowing she was leaving me to the worst night of my life.

As I mopped the floor, following the Luna's orders, I noticed people surrounding me. The Luna's voice cut through the chatter. "Bark like a dog since you can never become a wolf," she commanded, her words laced with cruelty.

The Luna's cruelty was a brutal ritual I had grown accustomed to over the years. The pack had gathered, their faces a blend of curiosity and malicious delight as I was made to endure their taunts and harsh treatment. The Luna's laughter echoed around the room as she ordered me to perform degrading tasks, each command more humiliating than the last. My body was bruised, and my spirit was crushed under the weight of their scorn.

As the night dragged on, my mother finally arrived. Her face was pale, eyes wide with horror as she took in the scene. Her heart-wrenching sobs filled the room as she frantically tried to intervene.

"Please, stop this!" she pleaded with the Luna, her voice breaking. "This isn't right. She's just a child!"

But the Alpha's response was cold and dismissive. "My mate gets whatever she desires, especially on her birthday. If she wants this, it's her prerogative," he declared, his tone final. The words stung more than any physical blow. His gaze was indifferent, as if my suffering was merely a footnote in his wife's celebration.

Desperate, my mother turned to my father for help. She found him in the shadows, his expression unreadable. "Didn't you see what was happening?" she asked, her voice trembling.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "I didn't see anything wrong," he said flatly. The lack of concern in his voice mirrored the Alpha's indifference.

I stood there, defeated, as my mother's tears mingled with the shame I already felt. Their failure to protect me was a stark reminder that I was utterly alone in this world—a world that seemed to revel in my suffering.

As I stood there, forced to endure the pack's cruelty, a sinking realization settled over me. No matter what I did, no matter how desperately I tried to escape or change my fate, this was never going to end. The realization was a cold, suffocating weight in my chest. My mother had come to seek medical assistance, only to be forgotten in the chaos of my suffering.

In the midst of the torment, I remembered her desperate plea for help earlier in the day. She had been inadvertently pierced by a thorn from a wolfbane plant—a plant with deadly, needle-like spines that, if not treated immediately, could prove fatal to a wolf. Her anguish had been palpable as she tried to mask her pain while seeking aid. But her plight was overshadowed by the spectacle of my humiliation.

In her attempt to rescue me, her condition worsened. As she fell to the ground, my father, oblivious to the gravity of her situation, dismissed it as exhaustion and stress. He carried her away, leaving me behind to entertain the pack. My hands and knees scraped raw as I fetched sticks, the laughter and jeers of the pack a constant, cruel reminder of my powerlessness.

The night dragged on, each minute an agonizing stretch of time. I could hear the distant, muffled sounds of my mother's suffering. The pack's harsh treatment felt like a distant echo compared to the growing dread in my heart.

When my father finally returned, his face was a mask of shock and sorrow. "She's gone," he said, his voice trembling. The words hit me like a physical blow, the reality of her death crashing over me with an unbearable finality.

The pack's laughter had faded, replaced by a heavy silence that seemed to mock my grief. The Luna's birthday celebration continued, but I was no longer a participant in their merriment. My heart felt hollow, a void where once there had been hope. My mother's death was a brutal reminder that in this cruel world, even the smallest glimmers of hope were destined to be extinguished.

As I knelt there, surrounded by the pack's jeering faces, the weight of my loss and the depth of my despair became all-consuming. My mother had come to rescue me, but in the end, she had paid the ultimate price. Her sacrifice was the final, devastating blow in a series of cruelties that had shaped my life. In that moment, I understood that nothing would ever change, and my world had become a place of unending darkness and pain.

The days following my mother's death were shrouded in a heavy, suffocating silence. My father's grief was palpable, a deep, unrelenting shadow that consumed him entirely. His mourning was not just for her loss but for the unspoken guilt that gnawed at his soul. In his eyes, I had become the embodiment of that guilt—the living reminder of his failure and the price paid for his negligence.

In the early days of our loss, my father's sorrow had taken on a bitter edge. He could barely look at me without a flicker of resentment darkening his gaze. His voice, once filled with warmth, was now curt and laced with barely concealed anger. He blamed me for my mother's death, a conviction that had settled deep into his bones. To him, I was not just a daughter but the cause of his deepest pain.

Every glance, every harsh word, seemed to accuse me of her demise. "If only you weren't such a burden," he would mutter, his words a jagged knife to my already wounded heart. "If you had been more obedient, she would still be here." The blame was a weight he carried, an anchor that dragged him down into a sea of regret and sorrow. He never saw her as she truly was—a loving mother who had tried to protect me against the world's cruelty. Instead, he saw her loss as a direct consequence of my existence.

Seeing me each day was a constant reminder of his failings. I was a living echo of his guilt—a guilt that had shattered the remnants of his happiness and left him a shell of the man he once was. His remorse was not just for her death but for the way he had taken her for granted while she was alive. His regret twisted into a bitter resentment toward me, fueling an emotional chasm that grew wider with each passing day.

In the hollow silence of our home, every interaction with me served as a painful reminder of what he had lost and what he felt he had sacrificed. The love he had neglected, the moments he had missed, and the life he had failed to cherish became intertwined with his perception of me. I was the painful truth he could neither escape nor forgive—a constant symbol of how he had lost his beloved mate.

This guilt consumed him, leaving us both trapped in a cycle of unspoken suffering, his pain a mirror reflecting the harsh reality of our broken lives.

Being thrown forcefully into the Alpha's office jolted me back to a cruel reality. Jaden had stormed in, dragging me along, and threw me onto the floor. "This can't be, Father! It's a mistake. She can't be my long-awaited mate. Do something!" he shouted, his voice a mix of desperation and fury.

I had never seen the Alpha as enraged as he was at that moment. His eyes blazed with a terrifying intensity, and for a second, I feared he would shift and tear me apart. "What do you mean this is your mate? Impossible! As the Alpha's heir, I simply can't allow it." He crouched down to my level, his face inches from mine, and snarled, "After pitying you and allowing you to stay with the pack, is this how you repay your Alpha? Getting mated to my son!" His roar was followed by a sharp, stinging slap that reverberated through my entire being.

Jaden's wolf whimpered, and I knew then that we were truly mated—his wolf couldn't stand to see me hurt. However, Jaden didn't care. I saw him struggling to keep his wolf from surfacing. As his father's blows continued, Jaden, unable to bear watching any longer, left to cool off, leaving me alone to face the Alpha's wrath. Elsie shut down completely, retreating to the back of my mind, silent and withdrawn. Her absence made me feel utterly alone.

As much as I wanted Elsie's help to ease the pain, I could tell she needed time to heal. She faded entirely out of my reach, a coping mechanism she used to protect herself from the intense emotions that might force her to the surface and expose her presence. This was how no one knew I had a wolf—my eyes never changed color to reveal her existence.

With Elsie gone, I felt weak and almost human, though I retained more strength than an average human. Curling myself up to protect my vital organs, I braced myself against the Alpha's blows, focusing on the physical pain to distract myself from the emotional betrayal. The pain was excruciating, as if my chest were being dipped into acid.

I knew nothing good would come from having a mate in this pack. I wanted to curse the Moon Goddess for my misfortune, but my mother had made me promise never to do so. Instead, I bore the pain, both physical and emotional, as the Alpha's blows rained down on me.

The accusations against me were painfully unfair. How could they claim that I had orchestrated my mating with Jaden? The very idea was preposterous. It is the Moon Goddess who assigns mates, not something within my control or influence. Yet here I was, beaten and broken, blamed for something beyond my power.

After the brutal beating, I was dragged to the dungeons. The Alpha commanded the warriors who carried out his orders to keep silent about what had transpired. I was thrown into a cold, damp cell, the heavy iron door slamming shut behind me. The darkness was suffocating, and the pain from my injuries throbbed with each heartbeat.

Hours passed in agonizing silence until the heavy door creaked open. Jaden stepped in, his face a mask of conflicted emotions. He stared at me for a long moment, his eyes filled with a mixture of anger and something else I couldn't quite place. Then, without a word, he sneered and left, the door clanging shut behind him.

I knew my father was aware of my situation. He had to be. The Alpha wouldn't have acted without informing him, considering his position in the pack. But I also knew my father's heart. He loathed me, and his hatred ran deep. I still couldn't understand how a father could despise his own child so thoroughly.

As I lay on the cold stone floor of the dungeon, every breath a painful reminder of my recent beating, I wondered how much longer I could endure this. The physical pain was nothing compared to the emotional torment. My own father's indifference cut deeper than any blow the Alpha could deliver. How had my life come to this—a hated daughter, a scapegoat, a prisoner in my own pack?

It was in the middle of the night when I heard a soft whimpering echoing through the damp dungeon. Curiosity piqued, I looked through the iron bars and saw a large brown wolf approaching. Even in the dim light, I recognized him instantly. It was Jaden's wolf, Jake. He looked sorrowful, his eyes reflecting a deep sadness as he laid down on the cold stone floor outside my cell.

Jake had always been somewhat kind to me during the rare instances when I encountered Jaden in his wolf form. Despite everything, I knew it hurt him too. The mate bond inflicted pain on both of us, binding our fates together in a cruel twist. How I loathed this bond. Even after the betrayal and torture I had endured just a few hours ago, I couldn't help but feel a pang of pity for him.

Jake's presence stirred something in Elsie. She sensed her mate and came back, but she remained silent, her presence a quiet comfort in my mind. The betrayal and pain had driven her into a protective silence, yet she couldn't ignore Jake's sorrowful visit.

We spent hours in a tense silence, the dungeon's coldness seeping into my bones. As dawn approached, Jake rose and gave me one last, longing look before walking away, his figure disappearing into the shadows.

In those moments of solitude, I pondered the complexities of our situation. Even in the face of cruelty and betrayal, the mate bond persisted, weaving an inescapable connection between us. I felt pity for Jake, for Jaden, and for myself, trapped in a cycle of pain and longing orchestrated by the Moon Goddess. The dungeon's oppressive silence returned as I awaited whatever fate had in store for me next.