/ Book&Literature / Fate & Magic
概要
Harry Potter died during the chamber of secrets while fighting Basilisk.
He met Lady death and send back again to fulfill his mission.
English is not my first language so it has many grammatical mistakes in it.
I don't own Harry Potter and the character within the series. Also, the thumbnail is not mine and is owned by their respective owner.
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16レビュー
3.4
- テキストの品質
- アップデートの安定性
- ストーリー展開
- キャラクターデザイン
- 世界の背景
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Translated - I'm up to date with the chapters (28 chapters) and here's my review... (get ready to read XD) the premise of the novel itself is good (even excellent so to speak) but Harry's reunion with death feels too empty and rushed so to speak what good I can get out of that dialogue is the advice and reminder that death tells the mc... On the subject of inheritance... 10 houses are too exaggerated... at least the only houses that Harry could have by right would be Potter (right of birth), Slytherin (right of conquest for defeating Voldemort and killing the basilisk), Griffindor (pulling the sword out of the hat showing that he is worthy of the surname) and Black (because Sirius is his godfather and "legal guardian" since he himself names him heir) and Perevell (on behalf of the Potter family branch by the blood) the other 5 are too many so to speak since it does not explain in any way how he obtained them and the only thing that makes you understand is that thanks to death and magic he is heir.... And summarizing the subject of the fiancées on the other hand... it was taken too lightly since they are not a minor thing in the magical world which is linked to magical treatises the part of the future wives and you also have to think about their due development for each romance and not just as "trophies" and Harry's development in that part feels like: Sirius: 'harry as you are the heir to 9 houses you have to marry 9 women' Harry: 'ah ok...wait...what! but why!?' Sirius: 'because you are the heir to nine houses' (Black 10th house doesn't "count" as it is heir in name unless Sirius has a child or dies so Harry becomes Black Lord) The treatises between families is fine but hasty there may be improvements, we must not forget that Harry is only 12 years old (he is about to turn thirteen) and he has 5 years and more in school before he comes of age and so his manor houses. The good thing is that at least Harry no longer has to live with his abusive family and is taking things into his own hands and they are showing him and teaching him how to be and behave like a Lord and he is living with people who appreciate him as person (although that part of the novel also feels a bit out of place) also what I liked a lot was the part of Sirus Black's trial and his acquittal... finally... looking forward to how the author shapes his novel, keep it up 😎👍❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Instead of a new fanfiction, it's like a compilation of various different fanfictions but way worse, The story is badly written, the characters have no depth at all. Every character including Harry have no depth, no feelings and are very badly written. The only thing the novel has going for it is the update schedule, but with the characters being bland and the story itself being really bad.
Issues I found while reading: 1. Horrible grammar. 2. characters feel flat and 2 dimensional 3. dialogue does not flow well and feels stunted 4. The story feels rushed and not well thought of 5. The world, while using HP relies on unnecessary plot devices and armors.
👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑 Finally After so long time someone write about heir of pendragon, le fay and merlin. Just don't drop it! 👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑
Mehhhh Harry is OP because go to bank gringonts Harry have harem because go to geingonts Harry x Hermione 🤢🤢🤢🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🤢🤮🥺 [img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp][img=exp]
Plot holes, seriously packed with dialogue from puppets, and is actually the generic fanfiction you might randomly see around here, on FFN, or even in Wattpad. Read by your own risk please.
This is a good take on the HP fanfic format with a lot of potential that I ended up binge reading.
i love this book good build up to and can't to wait to see who the other wife's will be keep it up please
Fiksi penggemar jarang-jarang Harry Potter harem mantap pertahankan terusss harem harem harem harem harem harem harem haremharem harem harem haremharem harem harem haremharem harem harem haremharem harem harem harem
it is absolutely beautiful it was the best harry potter fanfiction that isn't self insert or reincarnation it is going to be the only time I will be genuinely sad if you drop it now at least try to make it till after voldy dies
OK ignoring the grammar problems and stuff this is a 8/10 story. 3-2-4-4-4(rating)
Not bad, easy to read, a bit flippant, like a good harem story. There are of course small errors, but it is not critical. The story itself develops too easily, I hope the story with Voldemort is only the beginning, not the end.
I would recommend author to use some editing software, grammarly as an example because writing quality is terrible. All characters behave not like in original, and storytelling is barely passable.
I've read hundreds of Harry potter fanfictions, this one is a bit bland and is essentially everything goes right adding little to no original content that isn't in the original books or I haven't seen in another fanfiction. Is okay if you've never read another fic.
As someone that has read Millions of Words from hundreds of different works of Fanfiction for the Harry Potter series I would not recommend it to veterans, but for people who haven't spent hours combing through the best and the worst in tales that Fanfiction.net, Webnovel, and Qidian have to offer from the World of Wizards and Witches might like this one. It has the typical tropes of 'Having a Title Makes Harry OP' and 'Gringotts turns the MC in a Garry Stu' which are classics and not bad on their own, but the way it was implemented left much to be desired. There was no Build Up or sense of accomplishment in any of the scenes, they felt rushed and repetitive since there was not a single new thing added in to shift the readers expectations and the overuse of multiple 'OP Houses' feels unnecessary and excessive since either one of those alone could have done the same job as all of them together for the progression of the novel. The meeting Death scene left much to be desired as it was short, didn't add much to the story, and was underused even though it was Hyped at the Summary as the starting point of a divergence from the original. During the whole process, we learned that things are supposed to follow a script meaning that the actions of the MC aren't that important since he would be merely a puppet in the hands of the Author, maybe the intention was to have fixed points on fate and the way to reach them could be improvised (Which would be much better IMO) but I doubt it since it wasn't how it was explained. Death also felt a bit like either an idiot or a very naive entity as even after admitting that fate has somehow deviated from the original progression his solution is to mainly change as little as possible and hope things go back to normal and never get out of course again, maybe there is a reason like he could have handled the problem that caused the change in the first place but since we weren't told anything about it this feels more like an assumption. And finally not much changed from the event itself as Harry only learned the Truth about Sirius, which would have been revealed a year later so a change but not a big one, learned that he is the Heir of House Potter which didn't change much since it was only an excuse to get him in contact with the Goblins so he could get better stuff, and received a warning about Dumbledore, a very small one that at best should have made him suspicious and wouldn't have helped Cannon Harry at all since with his original personality it would have been hard for him to stand up for himself and with the little resources and power at his disposal would not have allowed him to fight an Evil Light Lord Dumbles. And lastly, the chapters are small for a Webnovel Fic and Super Small for a Harry Potter one. Maybe it is just me but it feels like there is not enough information contained in it and the development of the MC and the World is absent because the Author didn't have time or didn't wish to write longer chapters for this work. Finally, if you are not an avid reader of Harry Potter stuff in general don't mind my review too much and give it a try as you might actually enjoy the work very much and I am just more critical about it because after years of reading this kind of stuff it is harder to enjoy the small more unoriginal ones. And for the Author please do not get discouraged as anything written here by me was not done with the intent to bully you or disregard you or your work and the effort that you put into the story, I am merely giving a critique on the points I did not enjoy and trying to inform people about things that they might not like when browsing works to engage with. Do keep in mind that this Review was made when the story had very few chapters and things might have changed as the plot progressed and the Author got more comfortable with it. So thank you for reading this far and have a nice day.