Fate: Dead Man's Lament [Rewrite Up]

LV 4

FinnsRevenge

MC is whiny, tells others about his system in Ep 1 for some God awful reason. Why authors insist on doing this is absolutely mind boggling and annoying. Was really looking forward to a good Magus MC in fate because I enjoy the magecraft aspect of it more than anything else but the fact he goes "I cheated cuz I'm a gamer with an rpg system so don't be sad anymore" is an absolute deal breaker.

LV 15

Slushy_Apollo

Overall a decent novel a little slow paced for what it is supposed to be but my biggest complaint is it legit mentions the gamer system and I read to chapter 20 and all I can say is that garbage is not the gamer system it is missing so much stuff which could be amazing considering the fate universe with dungeons and instead we get none of that

LV 5

Synthesia

It's not a good story. The premise is good but the plot is not. The main character is absolutely awful. He has so many problems and so many conflicting character traits it's quite obvious the author has no idea what he wants with the MC. I made it to chapter 26. The fact he can't fathom being attacked by an organization while actively aiding their enemies is ridiculous. He then strong arms the org he was aiding into helping him get revenge, or the "Deal is off." Despite the fact that there is a Geas and he would have to suffer a severe penalty that he doesn't have the resources to give. As you can probably tell, this incident really bothered me, but its simply the final straw and a series of decisions and plot holes that make absolutely no sense.

LV 5

NO_GUD

Has great potential and is progressing in a good direction currently imo, the chapters are not exactly short and updates seem to be consistent to a decent degree. MC is enjoyable to say the least, he ain't smooth but he got his quirks that probably wouldn't get on your nerves. The story starts off with the MC surviving the Fuyuki city fire by being saved by Gilgamesh when starting his second life. (Note) Gilgamesh and Shirou (Shiro) are genderbent here so far as its AU. I don't think many should have a problem with this because female Gilgamesh is supreme and Shirou is just Shirou.

LV 1

Daemon_Anax

It was interesting until mc revealed his rpg powers. Like it's fine at one point when the story has developed for quite a while but too soon for me and just destroyed my interest . Just not my cup of tea , good luck on future chapters.

LV 2

Huntsman

Well, it's tradition, so why not? Thank you for reading my story, hopefully you guys can find some enjoyment here, though I don't doubt some might find things they either disagree with, or dislike in this story, but please bear with me, since everything will be addressed in the future.

LV 3

Phase_MorningStar

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What happened to the chapters why were they deleted

LV 4

Niomi

very good story, the world of Fate is well exploited. the MC has a lot of troubles that are dealt with in a good way in the story. the story is updating stably and has a lot of advanced chapter on Patre**n I don't have the exact schedule but it's updated every few days (and these are long chapters) peoples are whining about the story because the MC revealed his system (because of course an MC revealing his system in any is the mark that you should drop a story immediately(and leave a bad review to be sure)) it's probably the second best fate fanfic I've ever read. also the MC is kind of a brat but I like him anyway

LV 4

Fallen_Heaven

Hi Author like you're novel.It will be nice if you add some titles for chapters )O and how many chapters there are in a week :) ..............

LV 3

Welou

I actually wrote a review in another Chinese story on this site, but apparently I accidentally wrote it in yours. And I'm sorry if it's not clear, I don't know much English. And so I also read this story, I liked it👍🏼

LV 14

Envy_23

This will contain spoilers So far I am at chapter 21 and I must say that this is one of my favorite Nasuverse fanfics. I particularly like how we got female Gilgamesh and how she was designed along with her interactions with the mc. Another thing I like is how at the beginning leonis would talk to gil like he has a death wish as he did but near the later chapters he starts to talk with her while trying not to make her kill him as he has started to like his life. I love when he beat up Shinji and gil picked him up and the way she just dealt with the teachers and principal. The only thing I don’t really like about this book is how long the apostle arc felt and how it seemed useless to have such an interaction for oc’s that would be killed on later excluding one but we would probably never meet him again. I don’t dislike it as much as I did at first as it was used to show how even the weakest apostles are absolute monster and also include some character development. As Leonis is a magus I’m pretty sure he will get a true magic someday and I would like to give my opinions. I believe he should not get 1st 2nd or 3rd true magics as the first is quite the cliche and sometimes isn’t even used like how it should be. The second would make him insane like septet h and he already has something similar to it. The third is also a cliche but I am more fine with it being used than the first two but I think the last two would be better. The fifth is like time travel and I have never seen it used even with how op it is. Now for the fourth and most mysterious true magic, this one is unknown so far so I think it would be good for a fanfic as you can make it whatever you want. For any suggestions of what it could be the first theory I’ve heard was that is could be vector manipulation or particle manipulation Another way I would think of it as thier being to pairs and an odd true magic with the pairs being like an inverse, 2nd and 5th would be a pair of space and time while 3rd would be an outlier leaving 1st and 4th with fourth being creation so the fourth magic of chosen could be destruction of matter or better yet consuming or devouring any matter to make energy This is all my thoughts and you don’t have to do it just for me but I would like it

LV 1

Seth_Eden_5432

The author wonders why people got mad at "Hey, I have a magical all-powerful system" and because. Most people don't tell anyone what they're weakness is, it's not even a question it's just common sense. So, yeah the character...seems like he has a condition or he's just a very out-of-touch individual.

LV 4

Platinum_Eye

Author-san, you are doing great, one of the best Fate-fanfic with Nascent Kaleidoscope. if only those Martial artists stuff wasn't there... You could have thrown all Sword styles from Mushoku, it'll raise his Swordsmanship and Water-God style can give him almost an unfair advantage over Mages while North-God style can literally turn him into a great Magus-Killer plus Apostle-hunter. Though I agree that the nerfed system gives the story a sense thrill but you could have atleast kept the inventory and leveling-up-by-killing feature. I liked nearly everything about the story till now... but don't know how it's going to be later. Still those Martial artist stuff blows up many things and various different ways... don't mind this much if you had a particular reason for doing those things, as I said before you're really doing a great work.

LV 14

MacKenzie_50943

one of my favorite stories keep up the good work 😊👍👍 Don't know why people about him trusting someone with his secret of his system it's not like the system gonna punish him for it.

LV 3

Orsted_sama

one of the best fate fan fiction i had ever read.. .. keep it up author and please dont drop it. ...

LV 1

Aqisa

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