Assfish' System - Harvesting Essences To Evolve

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Assfish' System - Harvesting Essences To Evolve

作者: Enkamos

章 1: IQ Upgrade

"I am a fish," George thought, and frantically repeated. "Yes, I am definitely a fish. Assfish, the assiest of its kind."

George wasn't under any stress or whatever, this was simply the main thought-process that the less-than-average fish had. There were smarter fish out there, undoubtedly, but George wasn't one of them. All he did everyday was eat other, smaller fish, and he practiced his magical abilities quite a bit too!

Magic was very important in this world, every species was born with their own attributes, and these attributes strictly dictated one's livelihood, or survival! Most fish could only develop one magical power at a time throughout their whole life, which wasn't advantageous whatsoever, especially since most powers were based on heritage, rather than merit. This discouraged any sense of progress, but they simply had to live with it.

The latter meant that every fish was greatly barricaded by their own biology, it was difficult for them to adapt to anything other than what they were born with, which was ultimately depressing! Adventurous spirits were less than common amongst the fishkind too, most did not bother to be anything great, they didn't care about making a name for themselves.

Magical powers were strictly used for the sake of survival, regardless of what type of power they were, be it destructive or defensive. The sea was tough for the average fish, so their pessimism towards progress was understandable, not everyone could afford it. Fish truly were at the very bottom of the worldly power scale - They were doomed to be utterly insignificant!

Assfish were especially weak, because they could only fart out a misty, and sparkly green cloud out of their bodies, which only stretched three feet wide. This was a bit of a funny ability come to think of it, especially since this said cloud was less than useful, but regardless of the humor behind it, this fart cloud had a purpose, it wasn't completely useless. It could paralyze a target!

The lack of visibility in these waters also worked to his advantage, because if some fish was blind enough to float into his misty fart, then that fish would get paralyzed for three whole seconds! Three seconds wasn't a lot, but it was his main advantage here, three-thousand meters below the water's surface, so he had to work with it.

The stench of this fart was toxic, and would affect more than six neuron-cells of an enemy fish! That didn't sound like a lot, but for fish, six brain-cells could represent a whole heritage, which explained how they couldn't afford to endanger all six of them. This was why assfish were sometimes feared, regardless of how they were at the bottom-part of the food chain.

Anyway, since the waters were pretty dark down here, George couldn't do much throughout most of the day, apart from swimming slowly to preserve his energy. Apart from that, he also had a knack for putting his brain into use as often as he could, because over time, he developed such a need, for a reason beyond his understanding.

Of course, his thoughts were very limited, but that didn't stop him, and over time, he had learned to imagine things. He couldn't help but imagine how life would be for him, if he had the toughest, most toxic fart ever recorded! He wanted to be a fart master, solely for the prestige! Unlike most fish, he actually bore a bit of a progressive mindset, and this was rare without a doubt. He may even have a couple more neurons than the average assfish!

"Dare I escape this prison if I was the strongest? Dare I breathe air, even? Is that what the fugitives call it, air?" He thought.

Then, despite his progressive nature, he shunned those dreams right away at the very moment when they made him happy. He felt that he couldn't afford to be excited.

"Who am I to ask? There are three magical barriers, I'd never reach the surface..." He spoke to himself.

Every species around here talked about the magical barriers, at least, the ones that he didn't have to hunt, or get hunted by. The friendly fish talked a lot about the barriers, and he discovered that they had this unexplainable fear regarding the barriers! It was a perplexing topic.

Anyway, before he was about to spend another six hours pondering over the fifty whole words that he knew, a sudden sound broke his thin line of attention. It was abrupt, and it was somewhere deep in his head!

[Ding!]

[Greetings… George? I see you identify by that name.] A feminine voice spoke to him.

George didn't want to explore where this voice came from, he couldn't be bothered to do so, so he simply answered her, quite casually. "Yes, I am George."

[Oh, I just scanned your IQ, you barely have one-point to your name! Even that seems lucky, considering how irresponsive your brain-cells are, so I'm surprised you have a brain to begin with! Let's just cut the introduction then, because you're likely not understanding a word that I'm saying.] She said, and in the meantime, she also analyzed the surroundings through George's eyes.

Afterwards, she guided him. [Okay, George, I'm in your head, that's all you need to know for now, and you also need to listen to my plan, okay? Hunt for food, hunt anything you can, and I will use the prey's body to upgrade your intelligence afterwards.]

"I'm not hungry," He contested.

[George, you must hunt. Right now!] She yelled out all of a sudden.

Considering how small his brain was, this voice had overwhelmed him so greatly, that the sound felt like a bolt of thunder itself! He started swimming right away, and frantically searched for any little fish to kill.

About ten minutes later, after nearly a hundred meters of swimming, he saw a species which he would rather not tangle with; An angler fish!

They're notorious for leaving nasty bites, and although chances were that he could beat this one-foot long blob if he tried hard enough, he still didn't want to risk it. George was nearly two-foot long himself as he bore the shape of an eel, so he was a bit dangerous, in theory, but that didn't make him any braver at the moment.

That voice in his head, however, left him without any options, as she yelled out. [Hunt the damn fish, George! Just bite it, and I'll do the rest of the work. I'll introduce you to the Essence Harvesting ability really fast!]

In response to her blunt demand, he charged forward, right away, and rammed the opposition against its big head! A spooked retard such as himself, was powerful indeed.

Geoge had a physical advantage here, because an assfish's head was larger than its own body, so he managed to flip the anglerfish clockwise a couple of times! However, a headbutt wasn't enough to kill his target, so he also delivered a bite during the exchange, and a nasty one at that!

"Okay done," He said afterwards, and swam about five feet away.

[Turn around, George, and have a look.] The lady said.

That demand was simple enough, it wasn't as scary to him. He swallowed the bit of flesh which he tore from his opponent, and then turned around as per request.

"Wow, it's green, and shit." George said.

[That's red, it's red blood.] She corrected, [You see that light over there? It used to be blood, and now it's Blood Essence, it's very non-physical.]

After a few seconds, this same 'essence' bashed against his skull, and entered his body in some weird way that he couldn't understand. He didn't understand it, but didn't bother to care about it either, because it wasn't painful to him whatsoever.

Anyway, as for the anglerfish, it was surely dead now. Weirdly enough though, another string of light oozed out from its carcass afterwards. This light was pale, and white in color, it didn't seem as bloody, but it too followed the same, prior procedure!

[That's a sort of essence as well, I helped you harvest it from the carcass' bones. It's called Bone Essence.] She explained.

While this second string of light went into George's body, yet another light emitted out of that same, dead fish moments later. This one was blue in color.

[Now you stole its Mana Essence, George, along with its magical ability too. Thankfully the anglerfish didn't use its powers on you, as it would've been really bad if it did... and er, I just saw that you could've paralyzed this fish if you wanted to? It's beyond me regarding why you didn't use your powers on the fish, I'm guessing you were scared? It doesn't matter.] She added.

"Okay," He blurted, he was everlastingly oblivious.

Thankfully, though, the lady in his head was a bit more productive, she explained. [George, I am your Essence Harvesting System. Prepare to meet with what I can offer!]

Everything that happened after that point, went above his head, quite literally. All those three lights floated above his head, mixed together afterwards, and created a lavender-colored light as a result!

George didn't know what all of this was for, he wouldn't know, but then all of a sudden, he felt a little tickle deep within his noggin. It was later on followed by a sharp sting, which made him rush forward in panic! He rushed for a few minutes, before he forgot what he was swimming away from.

[Okay, can you understand me now? I evolved your brain… or you can call it an upgrade too. Now, your ridiculously empty brain has an IQ of ten whole points!] The system said.

A moment later, a little slideshow popped in front of George's eyes. He saw a blue chart, which featured white letters, and numbers of some sort.

Afterwards, the system added. [These numbers represent the three main essences you'll be using in the future, to evolve, George. The Mana Essence is the most important one, so I encourage you to be on a constant hunt for mana, and or magic in its entirety!]