章 5: Keeping the Heart
When gathering with his father and brother just now, Tania could momentarily forget the chaos between herself and Erlangga. But for some reason as soon as he closed the door of his room, the thought of his ex-sticking back.
It's true, said Rendra, you have to get together often!
Angga, you keep bothering my mind. Go sono! Tania fantasized as if she had thrown Erlangga's body, until the man's body bounced off into the sky.
Instantly his body went limp again. But Tania is still trying to condition her mood so she can still complete her task. Immediately he opened his laptop. He opened the folder, then clicked on the paper file he would check last time.
He was dissolved in the lines of sentences so that he could not feel the time had passed for about forty-five minutes. The night was getting late and his eyes were getting tired.
Alhamdulillah. Tania turned off the laptop and closed the screen. Immediately he rose from his seat.
He wondered whether he still had wudu 'or not. His heart hesitated, Finally he prefers to the bathroom to wash his face with ablution water.
His mind is now fresher and his energy has increased again. He immediately lay down on the bed. Do not forget to read sleep prayers.
10 minutes.
Tania is still rolling, turning her body. He closed his eyes despite being forced.
Why not sleep anyway?
15 minutes.
Still, Tania turned her body, right and left, until it ended to the right, as the prophet suggested.
Astagfirullah, it's late at night I haven't slept either, I can't oversleep!
Tania glanced at the clock. 10 hours more for him already counted at night. The principle after migrating, going to bed early, and waking up earlier so that he can perform the Tahajud and not oversleep in performing the Fajr Prayers.
The night is getting late. Tania is still nervous. He could not sleep.
His mind recalled the incident when he decided on Erlangga. Until now, he was absolutely sure. That it was the best decision to start this new life.
Tania still remembers what happened when she decided on Erlangga. At that time, in order to avoid seclusion or seclusion, Tania preferred the cafe to meet with Erlangga.
"No, sorry I'm here to see you for just a short while.
"Just where are you going, why are you in such a hurry?" teased Erlangga while trying to reach Tania's tapering fingers.
Tania refused to touch his hand. He hurriedly pulled his hand away.
"Sorry, not this time, look at my hijab now!"
"What's wrong, just holding hands."
"Someday you'll understand."
"Ta ..." Erlangga has not finished completing his words, Tania interrupted him.
"No, please listen to me first. This is VERY IMPORTANT!" Tania put very heavy emphasis on her last two words.
Erlangga finally, silent and began to listen seriously.
"No, you know now that I veiled?"
Angga nodded. Her hunch, seeing Tania's facial expressions were so serious, she had never even witnessed her lover that seriously, this was a sign that there was a 'something' that was both big and heavy.
Erlangga tried to calm down. He slowly took the orange juice before him. He sipped it.
"Santuy, Tan. Chat with him while drinking. First drink your avocado juice!" said Erlangga, smiling while pointing at a glass filled with light green liquid.
Tania according to. He fired once. Then he continued.
"Angga, this is a consequence of my choice. I have veiled ..."
"Yes, then?"
"Since I veiled I cannot continue my relationship with you anymore. If I am still dating, I am ashamed, and do not want to stain my hijab."
"Wait ... wait ... what do you mean?"
"You don't understand what I mean?"
"So you invited to break up? Remember Tania you promised me, you would never leave me!"
Erlangga's eyes pierced sharply through Tania's. But Tania avoided it by avoiding eye contact.
"Yeah, I know. That's what I did before when I didn't know. I'm really sorry. Today, the last day we meet. After that, please, please don't ever contact me again."
"Tania, what the heck are you doing?"
Erlangga's chest feels tight, even like someone who is having a recurrence of asthma.
But on the contrary, after talking, Tania felt relieved.
"Listen, Tan. You're not fair. You decide unilaterally."
"What do you mean, no?"
"I don't want us to break up."
"Please help me better, Ngga. I'm not asking for your approval about breaking up. This has become a necessity for me because I've veiled. I've been trying to talk to you right now."
"If you want to break up, you have to agree with me!" Erlangga's tone of voice rose, her face turned red.
"No, please don't complicate me. Dating relationships are different from marriage. As far as I am concerned, when married, wives ask for divorce. Indeed, divorce will occur if the husband agrees to divorce.
"No! Anyway no!"
"Yes, whatever. Whatever, yes, I say goodbye. Peace be upon you!"
Tania left. Before leaving, he paid for the avocado juice and orange juice he had ordered.
"Ma'am, avocado juice and orange juice, how much is that?"
"Thirty thousand," the cafe saleswoman answered.
Tania handed over a fifty thousand piece of money.
Looks like the cafe keeper listened to the break up between Angga and Erlangga. He took turns glancing at Tania and Erlangga. There was a sad face and sympathy on his face.
"Ma'am, I'm really sorry ..."
"Why, Ma'am?"
"How come it's decided, unfortunately it's the handsome brother," said the saleswoman, glancing at Erlangga.
"Wow, you don't have to kidding, hehe ... I broke up with him because of God. God willing, get the reward hehe. "
"Ma'am ... Ma'am, how come the good stuff is thrown away, right dear ... Oia until I forget, this is the change, thank you, "That lady handed over a change of twenty thousand.
"You're welcome, come on!"
Once again, Tania glanced at Angga who was still sitting listless. "Your drink is very difficult for me to pay. Goodbye. Hopefully after this, you and I can arrange a better life."
His mind was still stuck around Angga with all the drama created this afternoon.
Erlangga, seriously do you dare to accept the challenge of Sis Rendra?
If so, what did you do it for?
Suddenly in Tania's imagination, flowers bloom in spring. His heart space filled with fragrant fragrant flowers.
Anga, you did all that for me?
If so, seriously do I have to be touched, because you become a hero of love?
Flowers are blooming in his imagination expanding. There is a stretch of flower beds with various colors. Masha Allah! The entire space of his heart is filled with love.
Astagfirullah, what the heck, how come I digress like this?
Tania regained consciousness from her reverie. He muffled all the flavors he was experiencing. He was as strong as he was against the emotions that were controlling him with logic and common sense.
Not! You do it not because of love, but lust.
You know, love is noble and caring
Not! I will not accept love unless love rests above His love.
I just want love over love
Erlangga, prove it if you can win love
If you are still deluded and willing to be a slave to love
Just accept all the losses that will befall.
Tania returned to saying istigfar many times. He repeated continuously until his heart filled with that sentence.
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