4.91
あなたの考えを他の人と共有してください
レビューを書くAs of this review this has 10 chapters but I like this enough to comment .this might just become my favorite DBZ fanfic ever if the author doesn’t botch this. It’s so refreshing to have an Mc that isn’t reincarnated as Goku ,Gohan , goten etc, making the exact same choices making a huge harem like collecting pokemon and abusing the dragon balls for power and revives. The best stories are the ones with the simplest premise, I don’t need a cringy, edgelord Mc with a dumb goal like one shoting Zeno or the grand priest. I like this Mc because his goal is to live his best life and keep his universe safe, he can have normal conversations with women without being a blushing mess or a creepy flirt , he feels like an actual person and I’m loving reading about it. In summary love this and I hope the author finishes this because it could be one of the best stories on here
Idk what to say 💁🏻♂️ it's really good and different from the usual, I'm really expecting what direction is gonna take the story later [img=update][img=proud][img=update][img=recommend][img=strong][img=update]
This is a good review for a good story. While their may be a few misspelled or misplaced words, for the most part it is a good read and enjoyable story. : D
This fanfic is good so don't drop it and while you are writing it why not draft chapters of gohan si
[img=More pls][img=Shocked][img=gift][img=gift][img=gift][img=gift][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
The story is concise, linear and calm, at least until Chapter 18, where I read it. You can read it without fear, as it is a calm read, good for passing the time and you are left wondering what will happen in the next chapter.
[img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls]
I love it, make more chapters and keep improving and most importantly in writing have fun in writing
Only issues are with the writing and world building. I won't bully the author on the grammar too much; i've seen way worse, though running it through Grammarly or something similar would help immensely. The world building, however, relies too heavily on the reader's prior knowledge of the series. This isn't usually a problem with fanfictions because most authors choose to start from the beginning of the chosen series, teaching the reader along the way similar to the original, but with works that start 'in media res' to their chosen series, this issue can crop up. The way I would work around this would be to give little timeline internal monologues that explain to the reader the general universe timeline, major events on said timeline, and where the main character is on the timeline.
[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
No NTR in this story, this is my first fanfic and English is not my first language.. Ask me whatever you wanna
As of this review this has 10 chapters but I like this enough to comment .this might just become my favorite DBZ fanfic ever if the author doesn’t botch this. It’s so refreshing to have an Mc that isn’t reincarnated as Goku ,Gohan , goten etc, making the exact same choices making a huge harem like collecting pokemon and abusing the dragon balls for power and revives. The best stories are the ones with the simplest premise, I don’t need a cringy, edgelord Mc with a dumb goal like one shoting Zeno or the grand priest. I like this Mc because his goal is to live his best life and keep his universe safe, he can have normal conversations with women without being a blushing mess or a creepy flirt , he feels like an actual person and I’m loving reading about it. In summary love this and I hope the author finishes this because it could be one of the best stories on here
Idk what to say 💁🏻♂️ it's really good and different from the usual, I'm really expecting what direction is gonna take the story later [img=update][img=proud][img=update][img=recommend][img=strong][img=update]
This is a good review for a good story. While their may be a few misspelled or misplaced words, for the most part it is a good read and enjoyable story. : D
This fanfic is good so don't drop it and while you are writing it why not draft chapters of gohan si
[img=More pls][img=Shocked][img=gift][img=gift][img=gift][img=gift][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
The story is concise, linear and calm, at least until Chapter 18, where I read it. You can read it without fear, as it is a calm read, good for passing the time and you are left wondering what will happen in the next chapter.
[img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls][img=More pls]
I love it, make more chapters and keep improving and most importantly in writing have fun in writing
Only issues are with the writing and world building. I won't bully the author on the grammar too much; i've seen way worse, though running it through Grammarly or something similar would help immensely. The world building, however, relies too heavily on the reader's prior knowledge of the series. This isn't usually a problem with fanfictions because most authors choose to start from the beginning of the chosen series, teaching the reader along the way similar to the original, but with works that start 'in media res' to their chosen series, this issue can crop up. The way I would work around this would be to give little timeline internal monologues that explain to the reader the general universe timeline, major events on said timeline, and where the main character is on the timeline.
[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
No NTR in this story, this is my first fanfic and English is not my first language.. Ask me whatever you wanna