章 12: Naruto : Monsters: Chapter 12
Stunned for a few seconds as my body fought for air, I laid on my back and took a couple of deep breaths before flipping myself over and pushing myself onto my feet, though I needed to keep my hands on my knees to steady myself.
When I finally bothered to look up I quickly discovered that Naruto too had risen back onto his feet.
And he was no longer smiling.
He looked angry.
...
I felt the edge of my lip quirk up in satisfaction. "That's better, much better. That's how you're supposed to look when you're fighting, not that pasted-on smile that you keep wearing."
"What do you know!" Naruto yelled out and pointed straight at me. "What do you know about me? About anything?"
"You're right kid, I'd don't know you. And truth be told I don't give enough of a damn to bother finding out." Standing up to my full height I took a step towards the boy.
"But what I do know is that you're not supposed to laugh when you're in pain. That's something that every snot nosed-brat could tell you. It's okay to be angry, to be upset – you're just a kid, aren't you?
You're supposed to be stupid, to wail and cry over every god damn little thing like the brat that you are. So why the hell won't you just act your bloody age instead of trying to be so wise and smile away your pain. Because if keep doing that-"
'Cause you will hate yourself in the end.
"-all you'll be doing is hurting yourself in the end." Before he could as much as blink, I closed the distance between us and socked him in the face. Then again on his side. I didn't use the Gentle Fist, no chakra or any of my training in this fight, I just wailed my blows at him. "So get angry. Yell, cry, fight back, do something! Don't just sit there and smile."
I didn't even realize he had begun fighting back until I found myself folding over in two as a fist buried itself into my belly. The force behind the punch was insane. In all of my training, I had never felt anything like it from someone my age. Not even close. No child, shinobi or not, should have had that much power.
I see, so this was a Jinchuuriki.
"I'm the Kyuubi!" He screamed out as he threw another punch which I weaved around. For all of the force behind the blow, the kid telegraphed his punches so badly that I had no trouble dodging them now that I knew they were coming.
"So the fuck what!?" Ducking under a second blow I stepped closer to his body and punched him again in his side, only now realizing how little damage I was actually doing. "Demon-container or not, you're still just a snot-nosed brat. What the hell is wrong with crying when you're sad? Laughing only when you're happy?"
"Because then I'll never laugh at all." He yelled out in anger as he threw yet another punch. "I'll never smile. If I'm only supposed to laugh when I'm happy, then…then…" His blows began to slow until they halted to a stop.
When I looked at his face to figure out why I found myself looking at an expression so fragile that it looked like it would shatter like glass.
He sniffled and looked down at his feet and whispered so quietly that I barely heard him. "…Then I'll do nothing but cry all the time."
"And what's wrong with that?" I lowered my guard, suddenly feeling inexplicably exhausted. "If you don't cry, then how is anyone supposed to know that you're in pain?"
"NO ONE CARES!" I was knocked off my feet as Naruto rammed himself into my stomach. We were both knocked onto the floor before he straddled my waist.
In a complete reversal of our earlier position, he reached out and grabbed my shirt before dragging my face up to his. Ocean-blue eyes that were wet with unshed tears stared resolutely into mine. "I'm not like you. I don't have a mum or a dad. I don't even have a family."
With one hand still gripping my shirt, he raised the other into the air and brought it down onto my face. "It doesn't matter if I cry or not because no one will care. There is no one that will even notice. I'm sick of crying and crying when nothing changes. If there is no one there to wipe away the tears then what's the point?"
"So is that it then? They hurt you and you take it? Why don't you fight back? When someone hurts you, just hurt them back harder. That's how you make them stop and go away."
"But that's just it; I don't want to hurt anyone. I just don't want to be left alone anymore."
I laughed up at him after another blow to my face, a familiar warmth spilling from my bloodied nose and down the side of my cheek. "Well, I hate to break it you kid. But if you don't want to hurt anybody you're doing a terrible job at it."
"That's because you keep pissing me off so much." He dragged me up again before slamming me back onto the ground. "If it's some rich jerk like you, then I don't think I'll really mind bashing your face in."
For all the bluster of his words, his face told a different story. Though he tried to scowl in rage, all I could see was a crying child. Tears now fell freely down his face even as he rained more blows down at me, though they were so weak now that I barely felt them.
I could now see it clearly on his face, a pain so deep and old that it hurt just looking at it.
Yes, that's it. This is what I wanted to see.
Kids aren't supposed to hide their pain, you're supposed to cry when you're sad. Laugh at adversity, smile during hard times? Leave hard stuff like that for old geezers like me, they're not things a child should be doing. Not one as young as you. You shouldn't be pretending to be so old Naruto.
Did you know Naruto, there was a time I admired you?
It's true. When I was a child I honestly looked up to you. From the bottom of my heart, I adored you. I wanted you to succeed, to show the world that they were wrong about you. Back then when I kept watching you try so hard, no matter how hard things got, no matter how painful it was to just simply keep on living, you never gave up and still kept on fighting.
How could I not cheer for you?
So what happened to you?
The fool that you kept showing to the world was once but a mask, make-believe, something you wore to keep living because it was too painful to carry on otherwise. But when did the mask stop being just a mask? When did the mask become real?
When did you start becoming a genuine fool?
I remember now, that was why I hated you so much. When the mask became the real you, I wanted to know, where did the person I admire go? Why was there nothing but a shallow fool in his place instead?
There was something I always wanted to say to you – you weren't wrong.
You weren't the bad one, so why the hell were you punishing yourself? Why did you have to become the fool to please them? Those that hurt you? You weren't wrong so why did you have to be the one to suffer?
If you wanted to forgive those who had hurt you, then that was fine, do so, but why did you have to pretend that they never did anything wrong? They hurt you, wronged you, and they never once apologized, they never regretted it, yet you became the fool that you once just pretended to be in order to forgive them.
Don't try to live so wise.
Don't cry 'cause you're so right.
Don't dry with fakes or fears,
'Cause you will hate yourself in the end
Why do you keep trying to pretend to be so wise? When did you become such a shallow person? When did you become the mask you wore?
When the mask became you, I felt as if you took away my hero. I felt as if you killed him.
I never forgave you for that.
That is why I'm so happy right now.
This pain, this rage, everything that you were showing me right now, it wasn't a mask. This was the real you.
This was Uzumaki Naruto.
It's been a while, hasn't it?
Just as I thought Naruto, you are-
"-Interesting." I smiled through bloodied lips, "It appears I was right about you Uzumaki Naruto all those years ago. You really are interesting."
I blocked his next punch, snatching his wrist out of the air as it streaked towards my face. "Hey, Naruto." I looked up at him from where he still straddled me. "I have an offer for you."
He tried scowling down at me through his tears, his weariness and distrust clear.
I ignored his reaction, and gave him a genuine smile, ignoring the sting as my lips split open. "Let's be friends."
"…Huh?"
...
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