Reviews of Gaming Empire System by Notorious_911 - Webnovel

8レビュー

  • テキストの品質
  • アップデートの安定性
  • ストーリー展開
  • キャラクターデザイン
  • 世界の背景

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Notorious_911

This is just a test novel, I'm just thinking of this idea for research purposes. Thank you.

4mth
2 の返信を表示する
Euiko
LV 2 Badge

Very strange writing style. Regarding work: * The main character is given more time than the dungeons themselves at the beginning. Especially his exit into the forest is unnecessary, in my opinion, for the initial chapters. * The characters are not faded or memorable, with the exception of a few. There is very little description or reflection of their character. They are also hyper emotional. This is very strange, for example for knights. * Strong failures in Cause-Effect relationships. The motivation for many actions is very strange and does not look realistic. Which really takes you out of the immersion. In general, the work is very similar to the work of Chinese authors, I have already come across a couple of similar ones where the Main Character creates dungeons in the form of games. But it has some kind of dark style. Closer to chapter 50, it got much better when the knights started watching movies... alas, I won’t be able to support the author due to the restrictions of my country and find out what’s next. But as a fan of this type of short story: I wish the author success in his work!

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3mth
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paja
LV 14 Badge

as of chapter 29 I really like this idea, dungedons like game, and somehow author manage to build intereating plot into that but... characters are a mess, really a mess, from backstory we know that he was worker in his past life,who likes to play games. typical games, who after losing job just plays. and after comming to the castle he acts like he owns this place, without any fears and so on, just like a seasoned king, asking withput shame about info that even normal soldiers knows. He is overly dramatic, in like 3 hours he got 5 panic attacks, what could happen but not if after 5 minutes you play like the best actor. plot starting to get messy becose of that, i dont know what he is really scared of cuz those fears are short lasting. its more similiar to some psychic problems than character of a normal human. actually every character is like this which makes drama after drama often without rhyme or reason. author needs to put some more thoughts into that. ok another plot is from girl who makes a rucus becose she needs to see a lord to tell him something about destruction of the town that he is in, somehow she is not put into dungedon for that and she meets the lord, and what she says? - nothing, becose its not the lord that she expected. in medival settings like it is shown she could die for that. which is propably known to all( soldiers were scared of new lord). its just makes no sense and if its like that you should say something and not ask lord about precious one, too much knowledge can kill and you are asking for that. wrll but he gets to know the truth and what happens? she cries like a sloughtered pig. really thats a mess and i cant really read it past that point. other thing is that she says all of that in presence of normal soldiers and mercenary knights. thats a big problem. good idea for story, some interesting ideas here but execution needs more work, take toyr time to flesh out some things, becose its getting confusing. need more work on character development. I see a potential here for sure, hope that it will get better as time goes. hope that my comment will help you get better. 3/5 as of now( chapter 29) with perspectives for more

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4mth
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wrongaccounttt

The story is relatively good, but the characters are overly dramatic/emotional, they are characters that get scared easily for no good reason, overthink everything, cry for an unnecessary long period of time, & the worst was the M.C feeling sad for something as stupid as killing a dungeon monster. Everything else aside, as someone who transmigrated from earth, he is very aware of the fact that this is a game, moreover, there are monsters, so why the hell will he feel sad about killing them?😩 This story would have been really great if it was not poorly executed, but, despite its flaws, the story feels fresh & will keep you hooked.

5mth
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DavyDarkDaoist

Not a bad spin on the dungeon master concept, but poorly executed. You can’t say the MC oozes confidence in the eyes of others if he’s been described to us as a beta MC until then. The transitions are not indicated and the writing (at least, in the early chapters) is confused syntax errors are common. At least, the grammer is relatively fine. It doesn’t hurt to read like in some other novel, but doesn’t entice to go curther either. If author has improved, he should goba k t’ his early chapters.

5mth
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HomieLv1

Homie Nine One One needed a lady luck! Me no lady luck! But I can be here, 'cause I am Da Homie. I know he's been doing his best to write this, so I wish him good luck and hope you will read his book! PS: Change this cover ffs

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5mth
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VertiKalEl

Being 100% honest? The author asked for feedback so I came here with no huge expectations but... I'm quite surprised honestly. The content is refreshing! The ideas of nobles and dungeons being connected... They system. the mysterious woman - they all make me curious and begging for more! I honestly feel sad that it is just a few chapters. I love binge reading and this would have been a perfect read. If I read it when it's so short I'll be so dissatisfied because I'll surely crave more. Keep up the good work author-kun?

6mth
2 の返信を表示する
The_Procrastinator

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6mth
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Notorious_911

This is just a test novel, I'm just thinking of this idea for research purposes. Thank you.

4mth
2 の返信を表示する
Euiko
LV 2 Badge

Very strange writing style. Regarding work: * The main character is given more time than the dungeons themselves at the beginning. Especially his exit into the forest is unnecessary, in my opinion, for the initial chapters. * The characters are not faded or memorable, with the exception of a few. There is very little description or reflection of their character. They are also hyper emotional. This is very strange, for example for knights. * Strong failures in Cause-Effect relationships. The motivation for many actions is very strange and does not look realistic. Which really takes you out of the immersion. In general, the work is very similar to the work of Chinese authors, I have already come across a couple of similar ones where the Main Character creates dungeons in the form of games. But it has some kind of dark style. Closer to chapter 50, it got much better when the knights started watching movies... alas, I won’t be able to support the author due to the restrictions of my country and find out what’s next. But as a fan of this type of short story: I wish the author success in his work!

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3mth
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paja
LV 14 Badge

as of chapter 29 I really like this idea, dungedons like game, and somehow author manage to build intereating plot into that but... characters are a mess, really a mess, from backstory we know that he was worker in his past life,who likes to play games. typical games, who after losing job just plays. and after comming to the castle he acts like he owns this place, without any fears and so on, just like a seasoned king, asking withput shame about info that even normal soldiers knows. He is overly dramatic, in like 3 hours he got 5 panic attacks, what could happen but not if after 5 minutes you play like the best actor. plot starting to get messy becose of that, i dont know what he is really scared of cuz those fears are short lasting. its more similiar to some psychic problems than character of a normal human. actually every character is like this which makes drama after drama often without rhyme or reason. author needs to put some more thoughts into that. ok another plot is from girl who makes a rucus becose she needs to see a lord to tell him something about destruction of the town that he is in, somehow she is not put into dungedon for that and she meets the lord, and what she says? - nothing, becose its not the lord that she expected. in medival settings like it is shown she could die for that. which is propably known to all( soldiers were scared of new lord). its just makes no sense and if its like that you should say something and not ask lord about precious one, too much knowledge can kill and you are asking for that. wrll but he gets to know the truth and what happens? she cries like a sloughtered pig. really thats a mess and i cant really read it past that point. other thing is that she says all of that in presence of normal soldiers and mercenary knights. thats a big problem. good idea for story, some interesting ideas here but execution needs more work, take toyr time to flesh out some things, becose its getting confusing. need more work on character development. I see a potential here for sure, hope that it will get better as time goes. hope that my comment will help you get better. 3/5 as of now( chapter 29) with perspectives for more

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wrongaccounttt

The story is relatively good, but the characters are overly dramatic/emotional, they are characters that get scared easily for no good reason, overthink everything, cry for an unnecessary long period of time, & the worst was the M.C feeling sad for something as stupid as killing a dungeon monster. Everything else aside, as someone who transmigrated from earth, he is very aware of the fact that this is a game, moreover, there are monsters, so why the hell will he feel sad about killing them?😩 This story would have been really great if it was not poorly executed, but, despite its flaws, the story feels fresh & will keep you hooked.

5mth
0 の返信を表示する
DavyDarkDaoist

Not a bad spin on the dungeon master concept, but poorly executed. You can’t say the MC oozes confidence in the eyes of others if he’s been described to us as a beta MC until then. The transitions are not indicated and the writing (at least, in the early chapters) is confused syntax errors are common. At least, the grammer is relatively fine. It doesn’t hurt to read like in some other novel, but doesn’t entice to go curther either. If author has improved, he should goba k t’ his early chapters.

5mth
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HomieLv1

Homie Nine One One needed a lady luck! Me no lady luck! But I can be here, 'cause I am Da Homie. I know he's been doing his best to write this, so I wish him good luck and hope you will read his book! PS: Change this cover ffs

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5mth
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VertiKalEl

Being 100% honest? The author asked for feedback so I came here with no huge expectations but... I'm quite surprised honestly. The content is refreshing! The ideas of nobles and dungeons being connected... They system. the mysterious woman - they all make me curious and begging for more! I honestly feel sad that it is just a few chapters. I love binge reading and this would have been a perfect read. If I read it when it's so short I'll be so dissatisfied because I'll surely crave more. Keep up the good work author-kun?

6mth
2 の返信を表示する
The_Procrastinator

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