章 36: What is Strength.

It was a long walk to the hospital. Without the adrenaline pumping through Lucus like his last trek through these roads, it was quite tiring too. Two steep hills also greeted them on the way. Surprisingly enough, Nate was actually doing quite well. It wasn't hot out by any means, but Lucus was still sweating a bit. Nate, on the other hand, was swiftly making his way up any hills or streets with ease. They couldn't take the bus, because each child received a debit card for allowance so they were stranded for cash. Mother could view any transactions made.

"How," Lucus breathed, "so good at this?" Lucus took a break and sat down on a bench. He had remembered it from his morning run. It truly was hard to believe he had done this trail just a few hours ago.

"What do you mean?" Nate hopped onto a decorative rock, then to a bench, making his way parkour style. "It's only a few blocks."

"You mean miles. It's way too far away." Nate noticed Lucus sitting, so backtracked and waited for him. He refused to sit down. "What kind of human are you? I cannot believe it is physically possible to achieve such endurance at your age." Nate shrugged.

"I worked out at the gym while I was in jail" He flexed a surprisingly large muscle to no one in particular. "Gotta work for these gains." Lucus got up and poked one firmly. It was rock hard but Nate didn't need that confirmation. He already knew.

"Pff." Scoffed Lucus. "Doesn't seem all that impressive to me." He rolled his eyes, making fun of Nate. He sprinted ahead in a display of power, before immediately regretting the recent exertion and doubling over out of breath. Lucus leaned on a tree in a feeble attempt to hide the fatigue setting in, although the possibility had long since passed. He was a year or two older than Nate, yet he had nowhere near the endurance or strength of him. It was times like these that made Lucus question whether he truly could be as great as another boy who could see. The discouragement was quickly wafted away as Nate humored him.

"Sure, old man. What ever could I do, to reach your level of power?" Nate laughed, voice dripping with sarcasm. "I am simply but a lame noodle in comparison to you, a boulder." He bowed low to the floor, as if honoring a deceased warrior. Lucus may not have been able to see it, but the gist still reached him.

"Are you calling me fat now, on top of old?" He propped his hands upon his hips and stuck them out like a diva. "Because then, whatever happened to respecting your elders? I have half a mind to make you bow again, for real, this time." Lucus pointed an uncalloused finger in Nate's unsuspecting face and waved it tauntingly. "Young man, you need to learn some respect." Nate laughed at this, yet his smile wavered for a quick second. The reason he did this remained unknown to even him, however. He looked down at the streets, then up at the rusting lamp posts. He chuckled at them, for some reason. There was something so human, that these lanky towers held. The way they flickered in the night with feeble attempts to relieve some sort of stress from others, yet littered with layered graffiti set down by those very same hands. The ones who cared not enough to relieve that weight and fix what was broken. Lucus seemed to be waiting for some sort of retaliation to break the silence, so Nate spoke. Not in a snarky way, though.

"You know what?" He stuck his hands in his pockets, closing his eyes as if to better understand the loud silence of Lucus's world. He breathed a small breath to the stars. "I never thought you were weak. Strange, right? When I heard you were, you know, blind," Lucus was still standing ahead, body turned towards Nate. "I thought you would be feeble. Small. I thought I would be forced to protect you or something." He made air quotes with his fingers, letting the cool air pass through them, the ease surprising him. "I thought you would be someone I could bully. That was the first thing that came to mind when they were introducing me to the place." He scoffed at himself, looking down now and opening his eyes. An unsuspecting rock was met with his surprisingly expensive shoes. "Can you believe that? Now," Nate looked up to meet Lucus's eyes, more as a gesture for himself than to Lucus. "Now you might just be the strongest person I've ever met." Lucus paused before answering, letting himself process the recent confession. At this point, Nate had already caught up, so they were walking together. The space between was a small distance

"I'm not strong. At least, not as strong as you might think I am. You could blame my lack of sight, but the fact of the matter is simply my own lack of stability. I was born blind, and I'm still so weak in my own little blind world. Regardless of outside forces." He smiled a bitter smile and continued walking. Lucus wasn't really looking for a response. The statement was purely rhetorical. Nate offered one anyway.

"What do you think strength is?" He gave Lucus a second to think, while answering with his own opinion. "For me, it's to persevere on your own power, yet to know when to ask for help. Even when It's hard. That's why I don't think I am." Lucus still seemed to be formulating an answer, so Nate continued to add. "I'm not strong, because I am proud. I'm reckless and I hurt those around me. I face the consequences. To be strong requires self control. I can't hope to hold that. Nor could I hold a flame to you." Lucus finished thinking, yet he clung to every word Nate had said prior.

"I guess, strength is subjective. It's what others have that we lack. Influence and money to the poor, and the kind touch of normality to the high and wealthy. Not even what we truly lack, for even the poor man could rally a revolution." Lucus stopped to pet a stray cat who was sitting on a cracked stone brick wall. Each word Lucus spoke was delicately placed like an artist's stroke on a canvas. "Purely what we perceive we haven't got. In truth, strength could be a double edged sword. You aren't weak because of your reckless nature, and you truly aren't proud or selfish. At least, not what I have witnessed. You asked Abby for help, you helped me when it brought no benefit to you. I find you wise beyond your years. I have a lot to learn from you." Lucus found himself in comfort from those words, rather than the bitterness he thought he would spit.

"You really think so? You're already so strong. Much more than me. You lived a fuller life than many, in just the few years you have lived. You fight everyday against the biases I and the world hold against you, so why, would you ever say you are weak. You help the whole orphanage and I know first hand so please," He looked Lucs in the eyes with such piercing energy, that Lucus could feel it penetrating the useless emotion conveyors. "Stop spewing that nonsense because I could only make others question their worn significance." Nate breathed, out of breath at his surprising anger. It startled even him.

"I'm, I'm sorry. I guess we can all be strong and weak. We can all only see the weak though, can't we. I envy the people with enough pride to only see the strength. I cry sometimes. No. I cry a lot. That's my secret. I cry for Allicia. I cry for my long forgotten sister. I cry for my friends and the orphanage. I even cry for the parents that left me before I could ever get to know them. That is the weakness I see."

"But that isn't weakness. It's okay to cry. I cry, we all cry. Don't," He paused. "Don't be scared to do so."

OMG. I am so sorry for the skipped update! I have been away on vacation, so I was unable to write while out on the beach. I made it extra long for you so please forgive me. ToT