Badass Peter Parker

LV 1

Kane_6327

Stop the basketball. With Peter's genius and the SI experience as an adult soldier, he should be more calm and mature. In pro or college sports he would get blood or urine tested and outed as a super, so he should not be playing any pro or college sports. He should rob cash from criminals or use his genius and meta knowledge to invent stuff to get rich. What use is an SI if he can't use his meta knowledge, especially when he has genius intellect now.

LV 4

Logi_cal

This just bad. All these ocs, and the mc isn't even the main focus. The mc is weaker than the original spiderman. And he doesn't even act like an adult.

LV 14

Sword_1mmortal

He’s supposed to be this cunning veteran with experience and discipline but he acts nothing like this. He gets set off by high schoolers when just ignoring them would do the trick. He acts more of a man child sometimes, like going off on a high school girl, legit yelling and snapping at them when he hitched on a ride with one of his basketball team members for sneaker shopping. Like dude, you’re the one riding with them. They’re annoying sure, just bare with it, have some discipline for gods sake. What happened to the whole Indian army veteran thing, it’s like the author forgets the background he gave his mc most of the time. Then there’s the whole adding other oc insert characters with abilities like stopping time.

LV 4

Otaku_Gamer_00007

I did a quick Google search the top earner in collage basketball can make is 52,000$ as an entire team and I also Did a quick search it costs 48,000$ to treat cancer or some times 1 million plus $ And this are the very top earners how the heck will he make that much money But if he Stole from some Big Drug guy he can easily cover the cost in like 2 weeks of running and looting and use a Dark not spider costume and then after the treatment is Done start Doing the good in spider costume easy and I Dont like how you have to specify his country kinda cringe I am also Indian but why tho

LV 14

your_daddy_007

simply your character does not match to the military commando background cuz a simple incident makes him overreact

LV 1

Fid3lisSilvq

To begin with. If you expect anything like your classical spider-man story of good person saves the day because it's the right thing to do, don't read this. This is a "cool and dark spider-man for older kids". With that all of the way... it's very well written, but the protagonist is either annoying or cringe(the writing style also feels a bit cringe sometimes). The way that he thinks and acts it's cringe he almost feels like and isekaied dark protagonist that it's super aware of what he is. Also the author just throw up a bunch mashed up writing ideas, it almost feels like he didn't want to make a spider-man fanfic to begin with.

LV 4

Lackada1sical

Initial Evaluation: Average Well written when it comes to thought process and few unnoticeable grammar mistakes. Problem is the originality, this is your same old spiderman. Reincarnation & foreknowledge isn't optimize, adult thinking is nothing, army style strat is zero. Can y'all please make a chaotic neutral and streetsmart spiderman? nothing changes from cannon MC to y'all reincarnated or transmigrated OC MC spiderman. make a difference dude and that would entice your reader more.

LV 4

Ashborn2271

So Mc is a special force army soldier from India. Hes reincarnated into Peter Parker with full power and Super genius mind from the beginning His way of making money is by basketball ( never thought an Mc would do something like that). He seems to have some goodness in him when he doesn’ want to rob the bad guys but still doesn’t want to be a hero. Its good with the world background and grammar but its a fic where you need to follow with the authors plan since( which is okay) Anyways the only way he though of making money was through basketball not much else shown of his so called super genius intellect. Thanks for the hard work in trying to write author san 3/5

LV 4

DaoistlcQyQq

If you guys are expecting this to be a spiderman fic then don't.

LV 5

DrAk_VaNgUaRd

I don't know what to think about this. writing quality and character development is good. But this is not Spiderman. mc get tired while fighting 10 high school students, what?????? Uncle Ben gets cancer????? Kingpin visiting hospitals to recruit Vulture?????

LV 4

Reborn_noob

It is better than most Peter Parker fanfictions out there but Peter's decision to join the school Basketball team to make money for his uncle cancer treatment has me wondering what happened to his intelligence. He can make a simple game like flappy bird and so much money or plagiarise novels from our world, apart from that it is written well👍

LV 15

Ethan_akky

so I feel like he is not using his spider sense at all, I've only read up to chapter 17, and I feel like his spider sense would have picked up a lot more

LV 3

Mr_Flash_XO

liked everything but would there be new chaps or sequel to this book?

LV 1

DaoistxKrO6P

Gross you are Indian ☠️☠️🤮🤢🤢🤮 you already lost 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂🤢🤮🤢🤮☠️☠️😂☠️☠️☠️🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤢🤢🤢😂😂😂😂😂😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭☠️🤢🤢🤢☠️🤮🤮☠️🤮😂😂🤢☠️🤢😂🤮

LV 1

IINeeRoII

Fue difícil para mi seguir leyendo. Tantos OC , que en un punto dejo de tener sentido para mí. 1.-Peter perdiendo contra matones comunes? Extraño, esta escena pudo ser escrita de otra forma , como el fingiendo perder apropósito o algo similar. 2.-Baloncesto... 3.-Emocionalmente demasiado inestable. No parece tener ninguno de los antecedentes que expusiste (militar). Actúa como un niño la mayor parte del tiempo. 4.-las interacciones son demasiado extrañas entre adolescentes. 5.- Múltiples Transmigradores. Esto en parte mató la historia para mí. Tú personaje perdió en parte lo que lo hacía especial. 6.-Te olvidaste totalmente del mundo en el que estás, es marvel, y por lo tanto se espera acción o algo similar. Pero se vuelve aburrido y monótono. 7.- Se describe a Peter como un personaje con Alto IQ , y lo tienes jugando basquetball... cuando fácilmente podría desarrollar tecnología de tu mundo (En algunos capítulos expusiste el hecho de que la tecnología actual era inferior a tu mundo). Siendo honesto no tenía problemas con que desarrollarás el mundo y lo construyeras lentamente pero era sumamente aburrido y tedioso. Aún así le deseo la mejor de las suertes en los que está tratando de escribir.

LV 5

MacleMore

I'm suprised that author make every character have reason and cause effect to their action they do and the though process making them more alive, great foundation for the long run and mqke peter's motive really sticks, just keep this quality man

LV 4

SALZ

llll