章 33: Angered To Death?
Li Ao retreated into the treatment room.
The room itself was but a long hall with plenty of beds and attendants. A mysterious, dark blue light enveloped the room itself. A handful of people rested within.
After checking the sleeping Lei Jin and Zhen Zedong, Li Ao noticed Qing Yan sleeping on one of the beds. She had no injuries, but purple bags seemed to appear under her eyes. Li Ao felt a tingling in his heart, then left after receiving some medication.
He still had one more fight ahead of him, and from the looks of it it was going to be a fierce one.
An attendant chased after him right then and delivered a bottle of pills—they were 8-th grade Muscle Mending Pills.
After he received them, another attendant arrived, giving an exquisite jade bottle. She left after he took it from her hands, so Li Ao couldn't question who sent it.
There was a single Bone-Strengthening Pill inside.
Popping the pills in succession, Li Ao sat down near the audience seats and watched the ongoing fight.
Jie Mentai and Yun Fanghe's fight was a fierce one.
Former's cultivation couldn't be read, no matter what he did, while latter presented the overbearing pressure of a second-step Foundation Establishment cultivator.
In addition, Yun Fanghe's green halo was almost three times thicker than other heaven's children.
While he observed their fighting, Fan Yueyin's divine sense washed over him.
'Well done.'
Li Ao smiled. ''Thank you, master.''
'I'm going to ask a few things about your martial art—will you be upset?'
'Am I going to be upset?' A silly, understanding grin on his face, Li Ao thought only for a moment.
''It is no trouble. Give me a moment—''
Li Ao took out his formation flags and made a quick sound blocking formation. He included several additional lines to the formation's base, enabling Fan Yueyin's Divine Sense to pierce through it with ease.
'Is it a family art?'
''Yes.''
'What is the condition to break it?'
''A cultivation base at least four small stages higher than the user, or a fire-mastery above the user.''
'Is that why you were confident?'
''I wasn't exactly confident.'' Li Ao shook his head. ''Master, my Qi or Spiritual Pressure can't really match Zhen Zedong's capacity. Even with a thirteenth-level Qi Condensation cultivation base, the difference between us is a tad bit large.''
'I can see it.' She snorted in his head. 'Still, it was a very dangerous thing you did there.'
'If the Zhen boy wasn't afraid of dying, he would have killed you first. Were you aware of that?'
''...he was afraid of death?''
Li Ao sighed.
''I thought his pride got the better of him, not fear...I just took the gamble that I could withstand the aftermath better than him. And I did, still.''
'You don't always gamble like this, I hope?'
''No. I didn't have the luxury most of the time.''
Thinking of the arduous years of being chased, Li Ao let out another sigh.
''If I had worn my senior brother's and sister's equipment, it wouldn't have been this difficult.''
'So you are aware of your mistake?'
''I am, I am. I just wanted to see where I stand.''
Fan Yueyin laughed. Her voice sounded a tad bit derisive, however, and Li Ao understood only a moment later.
'Alright. Be careful of using that martial arts. Even here, there are too many who have their eyes on you. Two-fold sect might have a word with you as well.'
'I can manage to protect you when you are close, but I can't be with you all the time.'
'You have to be strong, Liao.'
''Master...''
'How come you never talked about your family?'
''I thought I did?''
'You only told me of your ambition, not of them.'
'Be honest, do you even need me as a master?'
''Please don't joke like that.'' Li Ao's eyes immediately turned red. ''You are my master, and I didn't become your disciple for something like benefits.''
'Really now?'
''Master!''
'Alright, don't cry now. People will laugh at you.'
Though she made fun of him, Li Ao could sense a weird tone in her voice. He wasn't sure if she was relieved, or only teasing him.
Still, he knew just how much time he had left here. Being reminded of it only made Li Ao further distressed.
''Master, are you trying to sabotage my match or what?''
'...'
''Also, don't take so many pictures at once! What will you do if it malfunctions from excessive use!?'
'It can get broken!?'
Li Ao's eyes popped out at her shout. Never once did he hear her so distraught.
''Ah, I mean, it could. Just don't over exert it!''
'...why don't you make me nine more? I can just put ten of them on and rotate the uses between each ring.'
''...''
Feeling blasts of Spiritual Qi wash over his face, Li Ao let out a tired breath.
The pills helped him recover most of his Qi, but his Physique couldn't be healed in such a short time. If he could put a number on it, he was only at seventy percent of his power now.
'I'll put on both pieces of equipment,' he thought. 'Then go all out from the start.'
That was a very obvious tactic, of course. But Li Ao didn't really have the leeway to do anything else.
This Jie Mentai was a total lunatic!
Watching her beat down Yun Fanghe like was like watching a grown man beat up a child. The latter couldn't advance nor retreat, and had no chance to unleash her magical arts.
The most terrifying thing about Jie Mentai was her use of her peculiar magical arts. She used an invisible ranged strike, which couldn't be read even with Divine Sense, and only appeared at the moment of impact.
Also, there were five golden seals inscribed to her left arm, two of which glowed with spiritual Qi. Her current cultivation was thirteenth-level of Qi Condensation, with a faint Foundation Establishment pressure.
If not for the bone-age checks before the tournament, many would have doubted her age.
Amidst the rising speculations about her identity and such, Jie Mentai sent one last strike at Yun Fanghe.
Yun Fanghe spat out a mouthful of blood and collapsed where she stood, unmoving. The judge moved her out of the arena and declared a thirty minute break.
Standing up, stretching, Li Ao ignored Master Jiao and Riri's shouts at him and walked towards the arena. He sat at the foot of the stairs and cast a look to high seats.
Sun Jian waved at him with a big smile, while Fan Yueyin nodded. He also saw the Imperial Ancestor glance his way, though no pressure accompanied it this time, and also saw a listless elder of the Two-fold sect staring daggers at him.
'Why am I so popular?'
The problem wasn't being popular.
The problem was that he was popular with old men!
The audience didn't help either. Where were the pretty girls who wanted his babies!?
Wasn't that the point of having an audience!
Calming his simmering anger, Li Ao glanced back at the audience. There were still a few pretty women...and Master Jiao and Riri.
'Fuck, let me look at other people at least!'
The break ended rather quickly and soon everyone arrived. Li Ao ascended the arena with the judge and Jie Mentai, where all three cast weird looks at each other.
''Well, I didn't expect that you immoral disciples could reach the finals but...here you are.''
''What do you mean immoral, you old hog!''
''Hog?'' The judge frowned. ''Who uses hogs as an insult?''
''Midwives?'' Li Ao guessed.
''Midwife's your granddad!''
''What is wrong with midwives!?''
The judge snorted. ''Young bully is right. How would you be born without a midwife?''
''What bully?''
''Are you not a bully?''
Jie Mentai slapped her forehead.
''For heaven's sake, can't you be normal for a second?''
''...''
With a dark face, the judge flew up and waved his hand.
''Begin...''
The audience remained frozen solid at the ridiculous entrance. Many had their cheers stuck in their throat, and banners down at their feet.
This was supposed to be the final fight, right?
Why were these people talking about midwives?
Where were the fierce stares? Where was the hidden orchestra? Where was the useless exposition guy who explained every skill that wouldn't be seen after this scene in deep detail?
Sighs and gasps rose and fell, and both Li Ao and Jie Mentai stepped away from each other.
Now stood fifty meters between them.
Looking at the judge, the duo waited for another signal.
''...''
''...''
Coughing, the judge waved his hand and shouted.
''You may begin!''
Banners raised, cheers at the tip of their tongues, the crowd began rippling with excitement.
''Xu Liao team, be ready!'' Someone with a headband led the crowd behind her to a military formation. Banners up, flags fluttering, they stood ready to march to war. ''Don't forget your chants now!''
''Jie Mentai team, support the young lady!'' Another woman with a headband led her own group. They also seemed to hold a military formation, but the banners they carried had some...profound things written on them. ''We will show who is the real boss!''
No one had an idea where or when these groups formed. Few people joined in for the fun, and most were the people who bet on the particular candidate they supported.
''We begin—''
''Now—''
A gigantic beam of red light pierced through the sky and exploded in the middle of the arena, shaking heaven and earth. A silver light burst out, clouds parted, flames roared, and after a moment died with a gust of wind.
With the wind, the audience froze.
''What...what happened?''
''Why is the arena destroyed?''
''Did I see someone fly back?''
With their cries, someone's shout gathered all the attention.
''Someone is stuck in the wall!''
Looking over to the far eastern seats, everyone noticed a cloud of debris. A shadow struggled under its veil to move out.
Someone took out their banner, which read 'Jie Mentai my beloved' and poked the figure with its tip. The shadow trembled, and the man poked again.
He poked four times, then found himself flying in the air, screaming.
''STOP PRICKING ME!''
With a sharp shout, Jie Mentai leaped out of the wall and landed on the ground.
Her twintails were on fire, and most of her face and limbs carried burn marks. Her cultivation base teetered on the edge of dissipating. There was no aura of strength on her.
She was heavily wounded, and each breath brought her anger to a greater height.
Face red from flames of anger, she bellowed at the top of her lungs.
''XU LIAO! WHAT COWARDICE IS THIS!?''
Li Ao, on top of the arena, looked down at his gloved hands.
'Fuck, was I this strong?'
However, he soon realized that was not the case.
On his chest, he noticed a deep palm mark tinted gold. A sphere of Spirit Qi embed itself over it, trying to pierce through his muscles.
'She counterattacked...but...this weak?'
Even as he thought so, Jie Mentai rushed onto the stage and pointed a finger at his face.
''Blegh!''
Instead of words, blood poured out of her mouth.
''Sorry, I don't understand. Can you say it again?''
''I said—bleeegh!''
Blood flowed down her mouth like a waterfall. Gasping, she cast him a hateful glare and held onto her knees.
''Who the fuck uses their strongest move at the start!?''
''...that is the problem?''
Indeed. His first strike was his strongest blow, meaning it was also his last strike.
Bronze Mist+Scarlet Path+Phoenix Sword+Fire Mode Prismatic Gloves+Silver created a terrifying combo that could leap a Major stage and deliver a fatal blow.
Li Ao engraved the winning formula in his mind while Jie Mentai listed reasons for him to not go all out at the first round.
''...the spirit of the tournament itself! What kind of an insult is it to the organizers? And you didn't even give me a chance to fight—I can't accept this! I can't accept this result at all!''
''Okay, okay, calm down.'' Li Ao's eyes flashed with a weird light. ''I'll consider this a draw, okay?''
''A draw?'' Her glare toned down a bit. ''Just like that? I knew you seemed a reasonable man.''
''I have a condition, though.''
With a swipe of his hand, unaware of the ridiculous glances and curses he was receiving from the audience, Li Ao pulled out a page.
''You have a lovely voice, right? Just read this out and it will be a draw.''
Considering he had no authority to make such a decision, Li Ao's words sounded like bullshit to the judge's ears.
''I do?'' A blush spread across Jie Mentai's face.
'This girl...why is she so innocent?'
Clearing his throat, Li Ao nodded and waved the pages in her face.
As if forgetting everything that happened, she took the page from his hands and looked at the words.
''Script 38?''
''No no, don't read that. Read from where it says begin—I'll give you the signal.''
Then, under the baffled stares of everyone around the arena, Li Ao took out a large gemstone and planted it on the cracked ground. Its color a fiery orange, tens of thousands of formation lines circled its surface. Every second, a white light blinked out of the engravings.
Sending his Qi into the ball, Li Ao smiled towards the two old men in the audience.
Master Jiao and Riri started panting as a giant image formed in the sky.
The frame was twenty meters long and ten meters in height. The sudden appearance of a portrait gathered the attention of everyone, and many had sparks in their eyes as they observed this fresh phenomenon.
''What's this? A portrait?''
''Look at its quality and colors! Who can paint such a huge portrait with this detail?''
''But why is Xu Liao showing this? Is he showing off his painting skill?''
''Little Jie, begin!''
Surprised by his form of address, she stammered and began reading.
''Have you ever wondered—''Oh man, these pills are horrible! They only have, like, 30% purity in them, yo, like that's pretty harmful to my cultivation!''''
''Have you ever thought—''Oh man, these herbs, yo, they are like total shit! I can't make any good pills with them, yo!''''
''Perhaps you have thought them both?''
As Jie Mentai's voice echoed on the stage, strange expressions began forming on the faces of the audience. From one of the high-seats, a particular Zhu Qiu found his breath escaping from his lungs.
'Those retards!'
After her words, the image clarified.
There was a store front under sunny sky, four-story long, with two old men posing in front of an emblem. Both of them were bowing as if they welcomed some invisible customer inside.
''But fret not! In Fragrant Grass, you shall have no such worries!''
The image changed to the interior, where Master Jiao held a jar of Springvine grass. A blur of Riri's retreating figure got caught within the image.
''All of our herbs are sourced from organic plantations and Spirit gardens around the First Capital! Our pills are also made by the famed Master Jiao himself, who mentored dozens of Journeyman and Masters for four decades!''
The image changed again. This time, there was Zhu Qiu standing before a flaming pill furnace, waving his hand towards whoever was taking the picture. From the corner, the old face of Riri popped out with a smile.
People who could read mouths saw Zhu Qiu shouting ''Fuck off!''
Another huge slap echoed from the high seats, but no one took notice of it.
''Herb quality, pill quality? You shall have no worries about any of them! With six decades of Alchemy experience, eight decades of shopkeeper experience, and a century of life behind him, you can always trust Master Jiao to deliver the best of your expectations!''
Master Jiao came into sight, with a cold look on his face, wearing a deep scarlet robe that showed his majesty. Still, behind him Riri somehow found his way to the close up picture, showing half of his bald head to the audience.
''Okay, who the fuck is that guy? He is in every picture!''
''Fuck that guy, what the fuck are we listening right now!?''
''Is this a fucking advertisement!? Is this guy really using the closing ceremony for an advertisement!?''
''Hey, I know that Master Jiao!'' Someone shouted. ''He isn't even sixty-years old, what a load of bullshit!''
''I once bought a pill for diarrhea from that guy, and it made me constipated!''
''The guy behind him is Riri! That guy is a total pervert!'' A woman echoed. ''He kept licking and rubbing the spirit stones I paid, so I stopped buying from them!''
''A spirit stone fetish?''
''The old man is down so bad—''
Amidst the clamor, Master Jiao and Riri stood oblivious to their infamy. The duo kept squealing at each new picture that appeared, dancing with joy at Jie Mentai's beautiful(?) narration.
''Fragrant Grass! Quality over quantity! Our store is at the northern wing, Legendleg Street, fourth block. Prices are non-negotiable.''
With the script's end, the images dissipated on the air.
Jie Mentai let out a breath, cast another look at the script, then tore the pages apart.
Her eyes blood-shot, a ferocious aura escaped from her body.
''YOU RETARDED SON OF A BITCH, WHAT DID YOU MAKE ME DO!?''
Evading her palm strikes, Li Ao retrieved his Grand Image Gem and escaped out of the arena.
''I said it would be a draw!? Why are you hitting me!?''
''Draw!? I'll have you drawn and quartered after this!''
''What the fuck does that mean!?''
Jie Mentai chased after the screaming Li Ao.
In the sky, the judge shed a few tears, muttering. ''How did it turn out this way...how...''
The audience had nothing else to say. They were tired, spent, and hurt so deeply from broken expectations that many fainted where they stood. A few people spat out mouthfuls of blood from anger, and only two seemed pleased with the sight.
Soon, some people noticed the laughing Master Jiao and began beating him with sticks. Once the fighting erupted, other battles followed it.
People who bet on Jie Mentai went crazy with bloodlust. With sticks and stones, for no one was allowed to bring a weapon to the audience seats, they chased the scammer betting organizers and started beating them as well. Team Xu Liao joined the frey to protect their winnings—the organizers.
The sponsors and noble family heads watched the gigantic brawl with twitching cheeks. This was most true for Elder Wu, who couldn't wrap his head around it all.
''My disciples...my heaven's children...lost to two retards?''
It took some time for the judge to calm the audience and separate the stragglers. Then, casting a despairing look at the dumbfounded Imperial Ancestor, he waited for instructions.
''A disaster...a total disaster...''
Livid, ashamed by the twisted nature of the competition, Imperial Ancestor turned with rage towards the woman to her left. ''Fan Yueyin, your disciple—''
However, Fan Yueyin didn't seem any better. The cold aura around her materialized into snowflakes, each carrying a terrifying power. Many in the seats couldn't withstand the physical manifestation of her aura and paled.
Recoiling, the old man swallowed his words. The Imperial Ancestor felt relieved. At least she could discipline the retarded troublemaker instead of him, and that would be the more appropriate thing to do.
But next moment he heard her muttering, and his face paled.
''How dare he hide something good from me...he only gave me this small stone?''
''Unfilial disciple!''
The Imperial Ancestor felt blood rush to his head, then a trickle of blood escaped his mouth.
Sun Jian looked at the old man from his seat, shocked.
'Junior brother almost angered this old uncle to death?'
''He is very strong!'
Smiling, he patted both of his legs. His intuition told him that he shouldn't be here.
''Master, I'm going down~''
She didn't seem to hear him, so Sun Jian cupped his hands at her and left by himself. After descending three floors, he saw Li Ao running up the stairs. There was a wild Jie Mentai behind him, coughing blood as she chased his back.
''Senior brother!''
With a leap, Li Ao hid behind Sun Jian.
''Get out of my way!''
Jie Mentai struck at Sun Jian, but the latter caught her powerless strike with a hand.
''You bad girl, are you so intent on causing trouble? First you made the elder cry, now you are bullying my junior brother! How can someone be so heartless?''
''Heartless?''
''Me, heartless?''
Jie Mentai, unable to suppress her injuries, fainted from anger. Her figure toppled back down the stairs.
Sun Jian pulled her arms and prevented her fall, though her head hit the wall once.
Glancing at her pale figure, he noticed blood trickling down her mouth.
With a gasp, he checked her pulse, then cast a teary look at Li Ao.
''Junior...junior brother, was I too harsh?''
''Did I anger her to death?''
クリエイターの想い 
TheMonkeyMonk
TheMonkeyMonk This is one of the most retarded chapters I have written, and I enjoyed every bit of it. (๑ ˃̵ᴗ ˂̵)و
Next time on I Have Become An Agent Of The Universe!(God why did I pick such a long name) we shall have Sun Jian, the People's Tsundere, show off his skills!
週次パワーステータス
-- 推薦
ランキング 
-- 推薦
チケット