Even though he and Mahiru now had class together, Amane's daily life had hardly
changed at all. He diligently attended school like a good student, ate lunch with Itsuki
in the cafeteria, and went home afterward because he wasn't in a club. He almost never
interacted with Mahiru. Everything was as it should be.
One thing that had changed a little bit was that he'd started talking with Yuuta more
than during their first year.
That said, it wasn't Amane's idea. Rather, Yuuta often approached him, and Amane did
his best to handle the attention despite his obvious confusion.
The day of the opening ceremony, he had felt for an instant that the events of the past
might be repeating, and that had naturally set him on edge. But Yuuta was clearly a
different kind of person than his former friend.
Amane was still slightly on guard, but that didn't mean he wanted to awkwardly keep
Yuuta at arm's length, and as they spent time together, Amane began to recognize that
Yuuta was a cheerful, honest, and compassionate young man. Above all, he had Itsuki's
seal of approval, so Amane didn't think he was someone who demanded his suspicion.
After attending his first week of school as a second-year high school student, Amane
noticed that the pain he had been harboring for so long began to fade.
"Hey, are you cool with this?"
Sitting across from Amane, Itsuki said that as if he had suddenly remembered to ask.
At the moment, they were having lunch in the cafeteria just like they had done since
their first year.
Sometimes Chitose would join them, but today she was off eating with Mahiru. Amane
was glad the two of them got along, even in public.
"Cool with what?"
"I mean: keeping things as they are with you know who."
"There's no need to go out of my way to talk to her at school."
By which I mean, if I speak to her, everyone around us is going to stare and wonder where
I got the nerve.
It wouldn't do for meek, unfashionable Amane to be seen approaching Mahiru.
"Dude, she's just itching to talk to you, and it shows."
"…Yeah, I noticed."
Mahiru seemed to be doing her best to ignore Amane, but every now and then she
would slip up and stare over at him glumly.
So far, she'd only done it when nobody else was looking, but Chitose had taken it upon
herself to start giving Amane dirty looks on Mahiru's behalf, so it was becoming harder
and harder to endure.
"You need to transform. There's no other way."
"No way; dressing up like that is a huge pain, and you know I don't like the attention."
Besides, even if the rumors had settled down for the moment, some people had seen
him out and about with Mahiru, even if they hadn't recognized him. If people made the
connection that Amane was the mystery man, things would probably get so hectic it
would derail his whole high school career.
"Why are you like this…? And honestly, you could be so popular."
"That makes no sense."
Amane couldn't imagine changing his hair a little bit and suddenly becoming popular,
but Itsuki seemed convinced for some reason.
"I think you've got the kind of personality that girls want in a boyfriend. You've got a
cynical side, but you're also sincere, and you're the type of guy who treats girls well."
"…Isn't that normal?"
"I think there are a lot of guys who can't even do that much. Like, you're the type who
can figure out what a girl wants and then make it happen. You don't make a big deal
out of it; you just pay attention and then act on what you see."
"…You sound awfully sure about this."
"If you weren't that type of guy, do you really think that a cautious girl who's always
hiding behind a guarded smile would have ever gotten attached to you?"
When he put it that way, Amane couldn't refute his friend's theory.
He bit his lip hard as he mulled it over, and Itsuki laughed.
"…Also, can I say one thing?" his friend continued.
"What?"
"If you weren't into her, you probably wouldn't treat her as well as you do."
"Shut up. Is it so bad being nice to someone?"
Itsuki could read him like a book. There was no hiding how he felt. Amane turned away
and began sulkily slurping up the noodles he'd ordered for lunch.
Rather than teasing him further, Itsuki nodded sagely and acted impressed.
"If you ask me, you oughtta be happy. It's a wonderful thing to find someone to treasure."
"Oh, you think you're an expert?"
"I know I am."
"…I don't really care whether we get together. If there's someone out there who would
make her happy, I don't mind if it's not me."
If Mahiru chose some other, unknown man and was really, truly happy with him, Amane
would give them his blessing. If anyone deserved happiness, it was Mahiru. Of course,
he very much wanted to be the one to make her happy, but if she ended up finding
fulfillment elsewhere, he wouldn't balk at swallowing his feelings.
"…You're such a wuss."
"And you're a jackass… Look, I do want to make her happy, I do, but—"
"Then just tell her that already."
"I can't just come out and say it, you moron!"
How can I confess my feelings if I haven't even figured them out myself?
Mahiru was so cautious when it came to relationships that Amane was sure there was
no way she would be willing to go out with someone for fun or just to try things out.
It was all or nothing.
And given everything with Mahiru's parents, she's not likely to agree to date so easily
anyway.
"…You are a serious late bloomer."
"Shut up. It's fine; I can get her to like me in my own way."
"…Well, as an objective observer, I think it'd be better if you tell her everything straight
up, but—"
"But what?"
"…Nothing," Itsuki muttered. "…All right; good luck. I'm rooting for you."
Amane frowned, but he was actually really grateful for his friend's somewhatexasperated encouragement.
"Oh, Fujimiya, don't see you here often."
Amane had stopped by the local arcade after school. He was just inserting a bill into
the change machine when he heard a familiar voice.
He stuffed his change into his wallet and turned around to find Yuuta standing there.
He had apparently also come to play games and was standing behind Amane with his
wallet in one hand.
"Kadowaki? You're an even rarer sight. What happened to track club?"
"We have a break today. It's not good to work the body too hard day after day."
"Ah."
So the school's top track-and-field star takes a vacation once in a while, too, eh?
Amane stepped back from the machine, and Yuuta inserted his bills and waited for the
change. Once he'd deposited about two thousand yen worth of coins back in his wallet,
Yuuta noticed Amane staring at him and smiled.
"I'm surprised to find you in a place like this, Fujimiya. You don't seem like you would
appreciate the noise much."
"I hit up game centers like everyone else. I just don't like to waste money, so I don't go
that often."
"Hmm. Well, what did you come for today?"
"I wanted to check out the crane games. I got an order to pick up a stuffed animal."
Actually, it was more like Chitose had shown him the NEW ARRIVALS page of the game
center's website and pointed out which ones Mahiru might like, so he had decided to
get one as a present for Mahiru, since she had seemed a little down lately.
Also, as he had seen in the infamous photo Chitose had sent him, Mahiru's apartment
was quite sparse. So he was hoping to win a cute friend for the teddy bear he'd already
gotten her.
"Do you think you can win a stuffed animal?"
"It's kind of my specialty."
The crane arms at this particular arcade were stronger than usual, so it was easy to
pick up the toys. As long as he accounted for the balance and position of the stuffed
animals when controlling the crane, it was surprisingly easy to snag a prize.
It was actually his mother who had taught him how, way back in elementary school.
"This one, you see? If you bring the arm down right here, you can get it no problem. And
this one is good, too. Just hook the tag with the arm."It was one of many pointless talents
that had rubbed off on him.
Yuuta was giving him an incredulous look, so Amane led his classmate over to the
corner crammed with all the crane games. He decided to try his luck on a machine in
the new-arrivals section filled with stuffed rabbits.
Amane casually put a coin in the slot. Judging by the placement of the stuffed animals
and the size of the crane arm, a single coin would be enough. Some prizes took a lot of
money to win, but one of these stuffed rabbits—a character Amane didn't recognize—
should be easy.
He aimed the crane at the place where the rabbit's head and body met and skillfully
guided the arm into place, catching the head and avoiding the body. As the crane came
back up, it brought the prize with it, secured by the head. When he took his hand off
the lever, the stuffed rabbit tumbled down the prize shoot with a plop.
Amane casually pulled it out and turned to show Yuuta, who looked impressed.
"Wow!"
"The crane arms at this game center are strong, and the staff are friendly, so if you get
stuck, they'll show you how to win. It's a good place for beginners, too."
"So that's why Itsuki and the others said this place would be good? I see now." Yuuta
nodded. "By the way, is that a gift for someone in particular?"
"Yeah. Someone who takes good care of me. I want to show my appreciation."
Well, it's not a lie.
I just conveniently left out the fact that I'm talking about Mahiru. It's true she takes care
of me, and I am grateful for what she does every day.
He also quite simply thought Mahiru would look adorable surrounded by stuffed
animals, so his choice of gift was not entirely innocent.
"You're a really thoughtful guy, Fujimiya. But I knew that already."
"What do you mean, you knew that?"
"Well, you're sensitive, and you always act like a gentleman. Plus, you help people out
without making a big deal of it."
"Sometimes, I guess."
"Even if it's only sometimes, you helped me. Like with the bags and stuff, that was a
big help." Yuuta thanked him again with a bright smile, and Amane felt slightly
embarrassed.
It really wasn't a big deal, but apparently Yuuta still remembered it.
Amane usually had shopping bags on hand anyway, and it hadn't been his intention to
make Yuuta feel indebted to him.
"…Oh yeah, did you eat all that Valentine's chocolate, Kadowaki?" Amane asked, trying
to move past the awkwardness he felt when confronted with Yuuta's overflowing
gratitude.
Yuuta's expression grew cloudy. "Ah… Can you keep a secret? I only ate the storebought ones."
"You didn't eat the handmade ones?"
"…The handmade chocolates are… How do I put this? I'm sure there are some girls
who can make them well, but—"
"They're bad?"
"No, it's just… Sometimes they have hairs in them or other things that clearly shouldn't
be in there."
"Are we still talking about chocolate…?"
Finding out that something like that had accidentally gotten mixed in would have been
bad enough, but from hearing his voice, Amane suspected that Yuuta had discovered
intentional adulterations on more than one occasion.
He remembered reading somewhere that, long ago, people had believed mixing a part
of the body into someone's food could work like a magic charm to make them fall in
love. The person who consumed the secret ingredient was supposed to be helpless to
resist the effects.
"I accept the gifts, even if they've got… stuff in them, but… that used to happen a lot,
and I'm still afraid it might happen again, so I tell everyone ahead of time that I won't
eat any handmade chocolates. The ones who give them to me anyway… Well, I appreciate
the thought behind the present, and I do still pay back every gift. Unfortunately, some
of them try to disguise it as store-bought chocolate, but… What can you do? And of
course, if it happens more than once, I never accept chocolate from that girl again,
so…" Yuuta trailed off, looking sad and lost. Amane couldn't help but feel bad for him.
"…I guess even popular guys have it rough."
"Meanwhile, everybody is so jealous of me, I feel like I can't complain, but… It's not
like I want to be popular. Honestly, it's miserable. I'd give it all up if I could."
"Sounds serious." Amane nodded.
"I mean, yeah, it's disturbing. Girls give me sweets or food with weird stuff hidden in
it, smiling the whole time."
It was only reasonable to be apprehensive.
Ordinarily, most boys would treasure a girl's handmade food, but for Yuuta it was a
potential threat. Going through something so awful so many times must have been
terrible.
"Sometimes I think it would be easier if I went out with someone, so the other girls
would stop flirting with me… but I'm afraid whoever I picked would end up getting
bullied."
"…Jealousy's a scary thing."
"Yeah…"
Yuuta's shoulders slumped like he was at a complete loss. He seemed exhausted.
Amane won a large bag of potato sticks from a nearby machine and offered them to
the sad boy in front of him.
"Eat these; you'll feel better," he said. "And you know, if you ever want to talk or
something, you can come to Itsuki or me."
"It's just hard sometimes… So I appreciate it."
Seeing Yuuta so troubled, it occurred to Amane that popularity didn't always make
people's lives easier or better.
When Amane got home, Mahiru heard him entering and came to the door to greet him.
She was wearing her apron and had her hair up in a bun. She always tied it back when
she was cooking, but this time she had added a braid as a cute flourish that accentuated
her practical style.
Mahiru smiled, a little relieved now that Amane had returned. Apparently, she had
already finished making dinner.
After leaving the arcade, Amane had gone to a cafe with Yuuta to listen to him complain
over coffee. He had let Mahiru know he would be late, but evidently she had still
worried.
"Welcome home, Amane… What's in the bag?"
"I stopped by the arcade and got some prizes."
The huge bag was crammed full of all the things he'd won, including the stuffed rabbit.
It was obvious just by looking that there was a lot inside.
"…That's quite the haul."
"And I only used about two days' worth of lunch money."
"Wow, what did you win?"
"Maybe we can save that for later? I'm starving."
Amane wanted to find the right moment to present her with the rabbit. Her surprise
would be worth the wait.
Besides, his stomach was growling. He wasn't lying when he said he wanted to enjoy
some of Mahiru's delicious cooking.
"In that case, go change and wash your hands—and don't forget to gargle. While you
do, I'll set the table."
"Roger, roger."
He didn't really need the reminders, but it still made him happy to hear her concern
for him. She was maybe even acting a little maternal, but he didn't say that out loud
and instead headed to the bathroom as instructed.
"…So what did you bring back that needed such a large bag?"
The prizes must have been on Mahiru's mind. After dinner, she glanced over at the bag
sitting beside the sofa and asked about it again.
"Hmm? Stuffed animals."
Amane had no intention of hiding it, so he picked up the bag and set it on his lap, then
peeled off the tape keeping it closed.
"Stuffed animals?"
"You like them, right, Mahiru?"
"Y-yeah, I do, but—"
"I saw a few I thought you might like, so I got them for you. Here."
The best prize among the day's winnings had to be the stuffed bunny that was about
the same size as the bear he had given her before. It was pretty large, and he had won
it with only a single coin, so he decided it was all right to feel a little proud.
He pulled out the bunny and set it on Mahiru's knee, where she could get a good view
of its white fur and big round eyes.
He didn't really know anything about the particular mascot. He had simply picked it
out because a bunny seemed like something Mahiru would like.
She stared at the stuffed rabbit sitting on her knee.
"You… don't like rabbits?"
"…It's cute."
"I'm glad."
Mahiru wrapped both arms around the stuffed rabbit and squeezed it tight against her
cheek, just like she always did with her favorite cushion. For a second, Amane thought
about getting out his phone for a picture but ultimately decided against it.
She was smiling softly, so he captured the scene with his mental camera and pulled
another stuffed animal from the densely packed bag.
"There's more. I've got cats and dogs and—"
Thanks to the crane arms at that game center being relatively strong, Amane had been
able to get most of the prizes for very little money, so he had picked up toy after toy,
grabbing any and all he thought Mahiru would like.
As he added a beige-and-white stuffed cat that looked sort of like Mahiru's style and a
plush Shiba Inu dog, she looked at him with bewilderment.
"Uh, um, this many…?"
"I… Uh, I hope they won't be in the way…"
"No, not at all! I don't have any decorations in my apartment, and they're very cute.
I'm happy."
"That's great."
As he had imagined, Mahiru looked adorable surrounded by a small herd of stuffed
animals.
She was still hugging the bunny, but she looked back and forth restlessly between the
cat and dog, wondering which to hug next. Amane couldn't help but smile, and Mahiru
must have noticed him watching her, because her face turned bright red, and she tried
to hide behind the stuffed rabbit.
The contrast between the rabbit's white fur and her blushing cheeks was striking.
Mahiru's eyes, peeking out from the gap between the bunny's ears, were a bit teary,
which only made her more adorable. Finally, overcome by embarrassment, she leaned
over and buried her face in Amane's shoulder.
"…Don't grin at me like that."
"I wasn't."
"You were! You were smiling. Laughing at me for being childish."
"That's not why I was smiling. It's because you're cute."
"…So you were smiling after all, weren't you?"
"You got me," he said teasingly, flashing her another big grin. This time, Mahiru slapped
his thigh, so he rubbed her head in an attempt to pacify her for the time being.
Mahiru seemed to settle down, and when he grinned at her again, he did his best to
make sure she didn't notice.
"…I feel like this is all a trick or something."
"It's only your imagination."
"…Well, just for today, I'll play along," Mahiru muttered disapprovingly. Amane decided
not to point out that she was still smiling.
Looking at the cat that was in Mahiru's lap and the bunny she was holding, he thought
she reminded him a little of both of those animals as he continued stroking her hair.
Mahiru suddenly sat up. Her cheeks were still flushed, but Amane could see a new
tinge of protest in her eyes.
"…I'm always on the receiving end."
Apparently, all the gifts were making her uncomfortable.
"I'm just doing what I want to do, so don't worry about it."
"But… I'm always getting things from you. You give me presents, and you're so
thoughtful, and you spend so much time with me… Everything."
"But those are all things I want to give you, so there's nothing for you to worry about."
It's not like I'm expecting to be paid back or anything. It's just because I want to make her
happy. Maybe that makes it sound like her happiness is my compensation or something,
but the truth is it's all for my own satisfaction. It feels good to make her happy, so I do.
That's all there is to it.
But apparently Mahiru felt guilty. That seemed absurd to Amane, considering all the
trouble she went to for his sake, plus all the care and attention she always gave him.
He honestly didn't think he was anywhere close to balancing the scales.
But it seemed Mahiru felt the opposite.
"I want to give something back," she insisted.
"You're so stubborn…," he teased. "But… I guess if you feel that strongly, there is maybe
one thing I'd like."
"If it's something I can give, name it."
She really seemed like she was ready to do whatever he asked. Of course, he wasn't
going to put her on the spot with anything crazy. But he had to make a request of some
kind, or Mahiru would feel even worse.
"I want a pudding."
And so Amane gladly asked for something he knew Mahiru could handle.
"…A pudding?"
"One with plenty of eggs. I want to eat your homemade version."
"…You don't mean one from the store, right? That's not nearly enough to pay you back."
"Of course not. I'll only be satisfied if you make it yourself."
Amane didn't care for most sweets, but pudding was a different matter.
He liked cream puffs that were made with only pudding or custard-cream filling and
knew that if Mahiru made the pudding by hand, it was sure to be delicious. A sweet
treat skillfully handcrafted by a girl he liked… He couldn't think of anything better.
He made his request very seriously, and Mahiru stared up at him silently for a moment,
then nodded sharply.
"…All right, I'll make some this weekend. A stiff pudding with lots of egg, right?"
"Mm-hmm."
"I'll do my best to make something tasty!"
"Okay, okay, you don't have to get so worked up…"
"If I'm doing it, I'm going to do it right."
"Is that how it is?"
Mahiru seemed to be taking this very seriously for some reason. Amane thought that
maybe she didn't need to try so hard, but since he was going to get a delicious pudding
out of it, he couldn't complain.
He stroked her head once more to show his support, and Mahiru looked slightly
bashful and buried the lower part of her face in the back of the bunny's head.
Soft puddings with an abundance of heavy cream were delicious, of course, but for
Amane, the best pudding was a stiff one with plenty of egg, the kind that held its shape
even in the spoon.
The pudding that Mahiru made clearly highlighted the taste of the egg yolks while
carefully balancing the richness of the heavy cream. It had a clean, distinct flavor, and
the touch of the caramel's burnt-sugar bitterness kept the whole thing from being too
sweet.
Amane found himself bringing spoonful after spoonful to his mouth as if in a trance.
Before he knew it, Mahiru's pudding had completely disappeared from his dish.
"Man, that was insanely good."
"I'm really flattered to hear that."
She had brought out the pudding after dinner, and Amane had made short work of it.
One serving hadn't been enough, so he'd asked for seconds.
For a high school boy, Amane didn't have that big of an appetite, but when it came to
Mahiru's homemade desserts, he was not surprised to find that he always had room.
Feeling even more satisfied than expected for how much he ate, Amane felt utterly
content. He rubbed his bulging belly.
"You really can make anything, huh?"
"Well, I had a very… demanding education," Mahiru replied. She was not boasting in
the slightest, but it was true that her culinary repertoire was impressive. Sometimes
she even made dishes Amane had never seen before. They were always good, and he
couldn't get enough of her cooking. Having someone like Mahiru around to make him
delicious food was one of Amane's greatest joys.
"Well, I don't know what else to say, except thank you. I'm very happy."
"…Happy?"
"Sure. I mean, who could be unsatisfied with life when they get to eat tasty stuff like
this day after day? I always look forward to it."
Mahiru's cooking was pretty much what he looked forward to the most every day. As
long as he got to enjoy a meal with her at the end of the day, he could forget all his
woes and troubles.
Just the very fact that she was cooking for him all the time was cause for joy, and he
was flooded with feelings of happiness every time he took a bite, but Mahiru didn't
really seem to understand the value of her own dishes.
Once before, Amane had said that Mahiru's cooking tasted like happiness, but Mahiru
didn't seem to understand. If Amane didn't heap high praise on her, she might never
recognize its value.
Besides, it was good manners to compliment the cook when their dishes were
phenomenal, and he intended to follow through on that.
"…Y-you really think so?"
Mahiru's cheeks flushed slightly at his praise, and she shrunk into herself a little.
"…It makes me happy when you say things like that, Amane."
"Well, if you don't mind that they're coming from me, I'll give you as many compliments
as you like. Maybe you want me to be more specific, instead of just saying that
everything is good? I can do that, no problem."
Rifts between couples often start with forgetting to thank each other, after all.
Not that he and Mahiru were a couple or anything. But she made dinner for him on an
almost daily basis, and he believed it was important to express his gratitude often. And
besides, getting good feedback probably made her feel more motivated, so if she
wanted, he was prepared to present detailed notes.
But Mahiru shook her head, directly rejecting that idea.
"P-please don't… I'd die if you did."
"That's a little extreme, isn't it?"
"I'm being serious. What you do now is already perfect."
"Really? But you're going to keep making food for me, so I want to show you my
appreciation properly. Thank you for everything."
Honestly, these days, Amane's diet entirely depended on Mahiru's cooking, so he felt
like he owed her a lot and wanted to do what he could for her. She was so very
important to him. When Mahiru wasn't around, Amane quickly fell back into his old
hopeless habits, so he hoped she would stay by his side for a long time.
He smiled gratefully, and Mahiru trembled like a phone on vibrate, then quickly stood
up.
"…Stupid Amane…" she said in a cute voice. Then she carried the dishes over to the
sink. Amane followed, his own dishes in hand.
She had moved suddenly, so Amane wanted to get her attention to tell her he'd handle
the cleanup and that she didn't have to do anything else. The moment he lightly caught
hold of Mahiru's arm, she whirled around to face him.
She looked at him with a face much redder than it had been before. She seemed like
she really couldn't stand being there a second longer.
"…I… I'll do the cleanup. You can go hang out on the sofa. Okay?"
He ruffled her hair once and chased her from the kitchen. Groaning softly, Mahiru
rushed for the couch and sank into the cushions. Amane was caught off guard by her
sudden lack of composure.
As he washed the dishes, Amane couldn't get her bashful expression out of his mind.
He switched the tap to cold water, hoping to cool his head off a little.