章 19: Chapter 19 A New Life
Rudy [POV]
First loves are often called crushes aren't they? What a terrible naming sense.
In retrospect, it's probably a plus that my hormones aren't completely active yet. If I were a hormonal teenager I probably would have pushed her down, and gambled everything on a night of passion.
It's been several days since our date. I have been struggling with how to address the situation. I have had to come to terms with the fact that I am a dog chasing cars, dog chasing carts?
Whatever, even if that dog caught it, it wouldn't be able to drive it.
I might have won the battle for Lilia's heart, but Lilia, herself, is probably battling her own war with common sense. Lilia has been through a lot in life, and because of it, her common sense is slightly askew, but not so much that she could disregard the age issue.
Perhaps, she could look beyond it, perhaps not.
Remembering her character, I can't deny the possibility.
…or it could all blow up on my face.
Regardless, I have come to a conclusion. A conclusion I should have thought from the beginning, but I was too busy chasing tail, to realize.
What if I did kiss Lilia? What if I confessed… What's next?
Do we run into the sunset, do we find our happily ever after?
How nice that would be…
To kiss under the moon, roll credits, and scene. They lived happily ever after… but of course such a thing was an impossibility. Real life has no end credits(not including death), and there would be an after, if I kiss her, whatever that is. A very messy ending.
Not to mention Zenith…
"I can't believe I'm going to say this, but… what would Rudy do?"
The thing is as much as I try to live true to myself, the original would have never been in this situation. Seeing as he was never attracted to the glory that is milfs in the first place, and even if he did later on, Rudy, the original, was plagued with a different series of issues that would stop this situation from occurring.
I look out my window to see Zenith working in the garden.
Rudy was attached to family, at least the idea of family, so much that he would ignore Paul's and Lilia's affair, pretending to be a child, and even 'parenting,' his father. It was a family without a doubt, but it was a family built on lies and deception. If things had gone a little differently, just a little, then it could have easily blown up in his face.
Thank god for plot armor I guess. Or should I call it fate?
'You should still hug miss zenith…' I remembered Lilia's words.
Can I be a child for a few more years… I don't know-
No, even if I were 15, the age of adulthood in this world, Lilia would probably not return my affections that easily, because in her eyes I was the little boy she knew from infancy. If I want something real, I have to be real. The truth will come out, it needs to come out.
For my happy ending.
"Dammit… it's obvious ain't it,"
Love is all about taking a leap of faith at the end of the day.
Something I'm terrified of, it's probably the other reason why I sought out Roxy in the first place, instead of learning by myself. Pragmatism aside, I wanted someone on my side I could trust. Someone predictable, who I knew from the plot.
I'm just too selfish.
I want it all. I want the happy ending, and I want everyone I care about around me to have a smile on their faces.
But as things are right now, that is impossible, because…
"We're strangers," I make my way out, and start making my way next to Zenith in the garden.
If I'm ever to get my happily ever after, I'm going to need to tell her who I am, but doing so will shatter; everything. So before I do that, I have to lay the foundation, a safety net for my confession. So that when I confess, in every sense of that word, everything will be fine.
For my future… so that nothing explodes in my face… I have to make a bond, so…
"Zen-Mama," I said next to her.
It's time I started addressing the Zenith issue.
"Kya!" she gave a startled cry. "R-Rudy? Was Sylphy sick today?" She gave me a quizzical look.
"We cut our lesson short today…" I confessed.
Had a lot on my mind today.
Well, then here goes nothing. Let's see if I can get the 'True,' ending, shall we.
If I want my perfect ending, I have to make an effort, "what are you doing?"
She tilts her head, "...A… yes, I'm… gathering ingredients for some remedies while I can, winter is coming, and some of these plants will die before that, so I'm preparing for it," she confusedly, turns back to her plants, and continues her task.
"Can I help?"
She turns to look at me blinking her eyes owlishly, "Y-yes, yes. Of course you can!"
I still don't know what I'm doing, but I'm moving forward.
I turn to see a smile on Zenith's face, my heart a little lighter.
One day I'll be able to say everything in my heart, and when the truth comes out, it won't matter, because I built it on a foundation of love and trust, rather than a foundation of lies.
Oh, that's right.
I hugged her.
"R-Rudy?!" she looked at me in disbelief. "What was that for?"
"Just keeping a promise," I smiled at her. "You can thank Lilia later. Let's get to work before winter gets here."
It's warm.
///
"Neris Lily… Ranoan Petal… Chrysanthemum… who came up with these names?" I compare the plants I pick, to the pictures in a book.
It's been a month since then and I'm currently reading from the book Zenith gifted me, a.k.a. Mushoku Tensei Wiki.
…just kidding.
It's not as meta-breaking as that, but it's still pretty useful. It's basically a bestiary combined with knowledge about plants, as well as small pieces of trivia associated with them.
In essence the perfect book for beginner adventurers.
"This book really is a surprisingly good read, I didn't think about it 'till now, but it must have been incredibly expensive, "I flip the pages, skimming its contents, until a particular plant gets my attention. "...the mind herb can be found in many remote places, but is predominantly found around the beast lands of the great forest… hmm, can be used for meditation practice, mana control, or in defense of mental attacks… well, isn't that helpful," Turning to the plants in front of me, I picked them up, examining them.
"Too bad it's not predominant here. I guess it would be too much to hope for that Zenith would have some, huh,"
I wonder If I could-
"Rudy!" Someone jumped and hugged me.
"Ugwaa!" she caught me off guard. I almost dropped a couple potted plants I was holding.
"Ma-Mama, please be careful I almost dropped your plants."
"Hehe," she rubbed her cheek against mine. "But Rudy looks so cute, carrying my garden."
Of course! I am the cutest after all!
I am currently helping in the garden. I've been potting plants in preparation to bring them inside. The winter winds have started blowing, and will kill these little babies if we don't bring them in.
Winter is coming…
Ok, I'll shut up now.
Anyways, we've saved as many ingredients as we could from Zenith's personal garden. Honestly, I thought we would be done after week one, but apparently different plants have different tolerance, and so we kept quite a few plants unpicked 'till the last minute to have the maximum amount of ingredients.
Or at least that's what Zenith told me. It's not like she would lie to me… and it's not like she would be so blatant with her lies … and it's not like her son would pretend to go along with it.
Yep, everything is as she said.
That said, the plants are starting to lose their leaves, so we're bringing in some of the smaller ones inside, so they could survive the winter, incase of emergencies. Zenith's healing magic is superb, but disease is still a thing, and Zenith's level of detoxification magic is only so high, so having a small stash of medicines is always nice.
"Yosh," she picks up a potted plant. "Let Mama help. It's mama's garden anyway," she picks up a pot, and walks beside me. Our relationship is quite good. It's not like I ever hated the woman, the woman is a bubbling ray of sunshine. She just exudes so much positivity you can't help but see the bright side of the world.
Beauty, sweetness, and a tinge of magic. Is my mom a fairy?
"Lilia, I got another one, is there still room under the kitchen window."
"No madame, I suggest placing a few over the fireplace," Lilia suggested.
"Ok," Zenith walks over to Lilia and hands her a potted plant, before asking me to do the same.
"Here," I passed the plant.
"Yes, master Rudeus," she curtly replies.
As for Lilia… I can't get a proper reading of Lilia at the moment. Lilia's behavior has been… erratic over the past month.
We both need some space to figure out where we go from here, the die has already been set, and even if no words were said, we both know where we stand.
Well, at least I do.
In the beginning, she seemed unsure, on how to interact with me, similar to I was with her, then she looked tired, as if she had something on her mind that she wanted to say, but couldn't, and now, now she seems to have settled on taciturn.
She needs time.
If I didn't know her better I would say she was bipolar. Normally I would intrude into her brooding time, but seeing as I am the source of it, I'll give her some time herself, until she figures things out.
"There isn't any room left," I said.
"True. there are only 3 potted plants remaining though," she took one of the remaining pots from my hands. "I'll take this one to Madame's room."
"Thank-" she walks away, "you… haaa... things are difficult…"
I just hope she finds an answer soon, as our current situation is just too awkward.
"Yeah, looks like things didn't work out," a voice came from behind me.
"Bugwah!" I exclaimed. "Momma! Stop doing that!"
"Sorry, sorry. That time was an accident, I thought Rudy heard me."
"Well, I didn't. Honestly, are you a ninja, and what didn't work out?" I reach out for one of the plants in her hands.
I swear she's doing this on purpose…
"Hmm, oh, I meant Lilia's break-up,"
As she hands over the potted plant, it slips from my fingers, but I caught it at the base of my foot.
Uwaahh, that was close. I almost dropped that.
"Huh, U-um, breakup?"
I don't think that's quite accurat-Wait a minute! What she say?! How does she know?! What does she know?!
"Umu! Never found out who it was, but I think things ended badly, sigh," she places a hand on her hip. "Lilia was so happy a few months ago, she tried to hide it, but Mama knows everything, remember that Rudy," she holds her chin up with pride. "If I ever find out who hurt our Lilia, I'll…" she clenches her fist then punches at air in a jab. "give him exactly what he deserves."
Scary.
"...sorry," an apology escapes my lips.
"It's fine Rudy, you didn't break Lilia's heart. Oh," she claps her hands, "if you ever find the guy that hurt her, you have my permission to send him flying, I'll explain it to papa so you won't get in trouble," she says.
Please, please stop… my conscience hurts… and it was a little more complicated than that, I swear.
"Alright," she grabs my arm with her one free one, and pulls me away, "let's put these little ones in your room."
"Mine?"
"Yes, they smell nice right, I think you will like these two. It will give your room a Zeni feel," she winked at me.
I think that was a pun…
"...ha…ha…" I laugh weakly.
"...I thought it was funny," she pouts as we make it to my bedroom.
"Mama… I love you… but leave the jokes to the professionals."
A mom making dad jokes… Mom jokes?
"Like Rudy can do better, ahem," she puts a finger on her chin, before speaking, "'Mama there's no need to be so Rude-eus' remember that, because I do," she smirked.
"I-I-I… I have several years to improve,"
Probably.
Hey I wasn't a comedian in my past life of course not all my one liners will be zinners, or should I say Zenirs.
…okay, I'll give up now. Both me and Zenith are beyond saving.
"Hehe," she pinches my cheek, "Rudy's blushing cheeks are so cute~"
"Quit calling me cute, I'll bite!"
"Yes~" she puts her plant on the wardrobe, and the other by the windowsill, where she stops to overwatch the garden.
I follow her line of sight, and notice Paul doing his usual routine, shirtless, per usual, and of course the resident thot patrol just happens to be walking around this time, and pausing for a break while they watch the shirtless man do his usual sword swings.
Changing my line of sight to Zenith, I see her look at the field with a complicated look on her face.
I pinch her cheek.
"Rudy?!" she puts a hand to said cheek.
Payback.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
She tilts her head. Right, no pennies. I should expand my vocabulary and start reading these world's novels again, else I'll keep making expressions no one understands, but me.
"Ahem, I mean what's on your mind?"
"It's nothing, It's just," she sighs. "I'm just thinking how popular Paul is… and how it would be nice if I could make friends with one of the housewives," she looked at them with a glare, "just not these housewives."
I took a glance at my father's fan club, "they're really quite shameless aren't they?"
"I know right!" Zenith exclaims. "But that's not what I was thinking about." .
"It wasn't?"
"No, I've gotten used to your father having a series of women ogling him from a distance. Rudy might not know this, but your father is quite popular."
A gaggle of women is it? And yes I do know, I just don't get it. I just think this world has very low standards… ah… no offense mother.
"No, it's just… When we settled here I thought I might be able to make a couple friends with the local housewives, but… that's difficult. Wives, like them, have a lot of time on their hands, but those women aren't the type of women I want to make friends with, and the kind ones, like Sylphy's mom, are too busy with their own families."
As she talks Lilia makes her way outside, with a jug of water, and a fresh shirt for Paul.
"Luckily I have Lilia! But… she's been quite moody lately… she's been avoiding me after her breakup, sigh, it's lonely sometimes," she says.
"Is momma really not worried that father will ch-... do something stupid?" I take a glance at Paul surrounded by his thot patrol, now being served by Lilia.
It annoys me.
I don't think Lilia would do something unethical, this time around. After all, I was an unethical choice, and she was able to turn me down, so I can easily see her doing the same to Paul.
I was never able to breach the topic of rape, and self-worth, to do so, would need an explanation of how I know about stuff, I have no business knowing, but despite that, I'd like to think that Lilia is in a better state of mind, than she was in her story.
It has been a slow process, but our interactions have been able to bring out some of her inner fire.
I can't imagine book her teasing me, like real her does.
Unlike in the original, where she was quite detached, she does have her moments. So I am confident that she wouldn't do anything she would regret.
Yeah, confident.
Hell, something like cheating was a hard sale for the original in the first place. Practically out of character. It's impossible to see Lilia doing something like that.
…and yet…
That murky feeling in my heart doesn't go away.
Perhaps that is why I was so impatient, and going so fast; fear. Unlike regular relationships, you usually can't see its expiration date, but with me, I am heavily aware of an 'ending,' a bad ending, if I don't do something. So I rushed things, if only a little.
I take a peek at the smiling Lilia chatting with Paul.
I wanna punch him in the face.
I'm being paranoid… she wouldn't do such a thing.
"You mean cheating," she looks at me with a melancholic expression. "I admit your father can be really stupid at times, but he's had 7 years to do something stupid, and he hasn't, so I think everything will be fine. I'm going to trust your father. When you love someone explicitly, you trust them to do the right thing. That's what being a good wife is all about," she hits her fist to her chest.
You really are.
Trust, huh…
I look out the window, seeing Lilia and Paul interacting. If you love someone you have to have a modicum of faith.
This is the problem with having meta knowledge, I simply know too much. I know what could be, I know what 'could,' happened, but I also know they aren't characters, they're people, and they won't always act like how you expect them to.
Sometimes you just need a little faith.
I watch over them through the window, and think back on Zenith's words. If she can trust someone like Paul, then I can trust Lilia.
"If dad ever does something stupid, I'll beat him up."
Turning to face me, she looks at me with wide open eyes , before smiling, "Awww, Rudy is so manly, is Rudy going to protect my honor," she hugs me into her chest.
"...I hate you…" I muttered.
"He he, urk," she chuckles a bit, before pushing me away and making a quick flip back to the windowsill, before grabbing a potted plant, and, "hugwaah…" proceeding to retch in it. She then casts a Heal on herself.
"Hmm, sorry Rudy, mama's been feeling unwell lately."
"Isn't that…"
Six years… winter… it's around that time isn't it?
"Mamma, may I?" I reach a hand to Zenith's stomach.
"Sure?"
"Trace on," similar to before I concentrated, and used my control to push my energies into her. My experience with Lilia has been a good experience, and I can do this quite gently, without hurting anything, or anyone… "a baby… you're pregnant," I let go.
Not daring to do anything else, I let my mana rest, but without a doubt, I definitely felt the presence of something, someone, around her stomach.
Combined with the retching, she is most certainly pregnant.
"I'm…" she drops the pot, and a mess of plants, and last night's dinner is on the floor, "pregnant… I'm pregnant… I'm pregnant!" She hugs me tightly, and swoons me around like a doll. "I gotta- Paul! Lilia! Come home, I have something to tell you!" She yells out the window.
"Let's go Rudy!" She pulls me with her.
At this point she really can't be stopped. Making our way downstairs Zenith is holding my hand while slightly bouncing up, and down, off the tip of her toes in her excitement.
Paul and Lilia make their way inside, with Paul still having a sweaty visage, "Y-yes, dear?"
"I have news," she gathers her breath. "I'm pregnant!"
"Preg-Pregnant… We're having a baby?" he turned his head back and forth from me and Zenith, we both nod, "we're having a baby… We're having a baby!" he scoops me and zenith up into his arms.
Uwah, so tight. Seriously, can't underestimate the strength of an advanced level swordsman.
"Congratulations Sir Paul, Madame Zenith, young master," Lilia said with a demure smile on her face.
A new life, huh, how nice…
///
Much like my birthday party, what followed was a nice day of drinking and merrymaking as Paul took the day off, and Lilia prepared a large meal, while Zenith this time was the guest of honor. It being so short notice I couldn't invite Alice, Laws or Sylphy here. I'm sure they would have added to the atmosphere..
"Congratulations Rudy, you're going to be a brother," Lilia congratulated.
"Yeah, I guess you'll have a new charge in eight more months,"
"Indeed."
I look to the side, and see Paul and Zenith doing a funny dance, while clapping merrily.
"I wish we had music at a time like this."
Well, at least they're not drinking.
I looked at Lilia with a small smile on her face.
This is nice, dancing, laughing, smiling… I only hope this could last a little longer.
"Lilia, shall we?" I reach towards her.
She looks at me with a complicated expression, "Rudy… I…"
"As per your master's orders I order you, dance," I commend.
Joking of course.
"Eh? Um…"
"Please,"
"Sure," she agrees.
What you know, it really is the magic word.
We danced for a little while. Well she does, I just follow her lead, regardless we're dancing.
With a troubled look we sashay around, the whole time with her having a strained face. She has something she wants to say, but can't figure out how to say it. After a while she opens her lips and says, "Rudy, I…" before letting it trail off.
We're quite a pair aren't we.
"I can wait."
"...what?"
"I can wait. 'Till the day you can say those words, until then," I pointed my neck towards the goofballs on the dance floor, still in their own world, "let's join the party. It's Zenith's day."
"...yes," she said.
We joined the dance floor.
"Rudy?" said Zenith.
"Lilia?" Paul followed.
Clap. Clap. I started clapping a beat.
"...he he… I get it," Paul said before hooking my elbow, and pulling me along, and Zenith doing the same to Lilia.
Clap. Clap. Clap…
…
We enjoyed ourselves thoroughly.
"To the future," to end the night I brought out a cup of wine, apparently I'm allowed to drink today, and made a toast.
"To the future," Lilia toasted as well with a smile on her face.
"To our baby," Zenith toasted.
"To my family," Paul entered.
Clink.
…
Sometimes you just have a little faith.
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