章 12: Don't
"There! Done." Pansy exclaimed with pride in her voice as Hermione slowly opened her eyes to see herself in the brightly light mirror. She gasped as she took in her appearance. The bags under her eyes were gone, her hair was sleeker, untangled, and a tad bit shorter than she had remembered. She had been decent when she had arrived, but now she looked -and felt- better and more confident than ever. Beaming, she thanked Pansy profusely. The Slytherin waved her off.
"My pleasure."
Hermione looked at the time and realized it was quite early; about 1 AM and somehow none of them were wasted or asleep. Noting the time to the two other girls, she suggested that they each go home, get a bit of sleep, and meet up later. Pansy grinned.
"Sure. I have to teach you how to do this on your own anyways."
Smiling as she left, Hermione realized she was happier than she'd been in a while.
Maybe having inter- house relationships wasn't so bad.
***
Refreshed after a break (and grudgingly having done a bit of research on the spell and it's wand movements) I try again. This time, somehow, I feel even more empowered, and something clicks. It's going to work this time. Twirling my wrist, I clearly say the incantation...
***
I've nearly gotten back to my apartment, a bit tired but this is usually how I feel after waking up so I can manage until I fall into the bed. Twisting the doorknob, I've just about made it in and was just about to place my wand on the coffee table with my clutch when I feel the familiar tug under my navel and I am transported by magic out of my locked apartment. What the fuck is going on?
I land, and immediately I spot orange hair. An arm darts out and grabs mine, and I struggle to release myself from his grip.
"Ronald Bilius Weasley let me go right now or I will hex your ass so bad you'll need to go to St. Mungo's." My voice comes out low and threatening. Unsurprisingly, his eyes are glued to my chest and the small amount of cleavage that's showing.
"Bloody hell you look beautiful right now. Why haven't you ever worn anything like this before?" His voice is truly awestruck, which I would usually find cute but right now I find incredibly annoying, until I repeat my threat. He blinks before bringing his eyes to mine.
"You can't."
"You think being the Brightest Witch of Our Age, a war heroine, doesn't come with it's own perks?
"Hermione I just want to talk..." His voice trails off fearfully as he sees the look in my eyes. I throw my head back and laugh. It sounds like pure contempt.
"Talk? Talk about what? There is nothing to talk about. Nothing at all." I stare at him as he lets go of my arm and begins to back away towards the kitchen.
"Hermione please... This person- this person scares me. Whoever you are, you aren't my girlfriend. Bring her back, please."
His words register slowly in my mind, and I am shocked. Girlfriend? Very funny. And am I really that terrifying? I voice that aloud.
"I scare you, do I?" I say in a mocking tone. "Well that's not my fucking problem, ."
Weasley? How provoked is she right now? She couldn't possibly have found out I was cheating. That's impossible. If she did I'm 110% fucked, but she hasn't. She wouldn't even know how I met the girl I had been cheating with! She can't have found out. The computer was in the right spot, the website tab was closed, and she couldn't have accessed my account anyways, could she have?
"Hermione, what's wrong? I don't want whoever you've become. I want my girlfriend back. Why did you leave? Please, I just want our life back."
I stare in amazement. Boy he really is clueless. I whip out my phone and pull out the pictures of his incriminating computer screen.
"Oh really? Because I thought that was the one for you! Our life? Two months of it was a lie! I left because were a cheating bastard! because you're a cheating fucking bastard! Because you spread lies! About me cheating! When you're the cheater! So maybe I deserve someone who isn't such an asshole to me!" I scream in his face. He recoils at the accusations, clearly not having expected for me to have found out. He stares at the ground like a kid who's been caught stealing from the cookie jar, or in this case, a grown-ass man who's fucked up.
"Mione I'm sorry..."
"Sorry? You think you can cheat, spread lies, be an all-around general dick and think that will bring me crawling back? You are wrong, Ronald Weasley. I will not come crawling back. I waited, for years, and it seems like that was a mistake on my part because this is what I got. I am not going to wait again."
"Hermione please... I know I've been an idiot..."
"Idiot doesn't even begin to cover it. You have invented a new kind of stupid. A, 'damage you can never undo', kind of stupid. An 'open all the cages in the zoo' kind of stupid. A, 'truly, you didn't think this through', kind of stupid.
Let's review: you refused to be helpful at home, you were a general dick, you found a girl online, you gave in to her charms and lied to me about it the whole time. Then I left when I realized what you'd done, you were enraged, you spread rumours and lies when you knew it wasn't true and yet here you are pretending you're sorry? Like that's going to bring me back."
"Hermione..."
"I've waited so long and it turned out to be a waste of my time."
"Hermione, it was a moment of weakness!"
"A moment? A of fucking weakness?" I glare at him, and fear falls over his eyes as he realizes he's royally fucked up once again.
"I waited for you to act for years I felt like it would never come. I fell in love with you so long ago I can't even count how long. And then I was finally happy, and you had to go and ruin what I'd had like you have before. If it was a moment, you would've talked to her a while, fucked her maybe once before realizing what you'd done and come and told me and stopped your goddamned affair. But no."
"Hermione it spiralled out of control! I wouldn't have gone that far but I did and I'm sorry for what I've done! Please!" He's begging now.
"And I waited for you to do something for years! I wanted you to be mine! And now it seems like that time has been wasted, because look where we are right now!" I screamed in frustration, gesturing to the both of us.
"Please, Hermione, I want you to be mine."
He's desperate now, but I'm so done.
"Don't." I manage to say one more thing as I tighten my grip on my wand and Disapparated, watching the desperation wash over him as I twist into the blackness.
***
Fucking exhausted, I collapse on the bed and start to just absolutely sob my heart out. The stress of the past few days has really taken its toll; the Mudblood name- calling, the blood-supremist attitude and the fight with Ronald. I just sit there and let it all out from the façade I've kept so well for that past thirty-six hours. I don't know how long it takes but I cry myself to sleep.
***
Waking up quite late, around 2:30 PM (which is later than ever for me), I get up, stumble into the shower and look in the mirror. I chuckle weakly. All of Pansy's hard work has gone to waste; my eyes are bloodshot from the tears that fell, my hair is frizzy once more and I look so pale I could practically blend into the wall. Getting into the shower, I wash off all the shit memories from yesterday, letting the water take care of my troubles for now. I'm in a state of total bliss when the doorbell rings. I'm surprised. I wasn't expecting anyone, but I shout, "Coming!" before I hastily finish my supposed-to-be-relaxing-shower and pull a floral, summery dress Ginny had bought me years ago over my magically dry body and quickly check my hair, brushing it as fast as humanly possible before deciding it's good enough for whoever decided to call on a weekend.
Running to the door, I twist the doorknob just as the person on the other side knocks again. Opening it with an apology on my lips, I open it to see...
"Draco?!"
***
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