58レビュー
4.38
- テキストの品質
- アップデートの安定性
- ストーリー展開
- キャラクターデザイン
- 世界の背景
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great story the way how the mc is reincarnated into sand village with the powers of overhaul. Also the first fanfiction i red about mc being reincarnated in the sand village great story. also when is the next update author!!!
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WARNING I HAVEN'T FINISHED READING THE FANFIC YET I really don't like all these blushing faces....... better it not be a harem story..... if it's romance then it should be Konan no more- although I hate romance so much. the story is still so good! and I can't just leave it cause it's romance(maybe I'll do that if it's an average novel/fan-fic but not if it's...well... better than average? well, that doesn't applicate to harem fanfics/novels, cause I will not even bother reading the synopsis after seeing its tag...uhm "I'm the fated villain, ATG and the servant is a demon king " are an exception tho ). and Konan is one of my fav characters so far so i guess it's ok? evaluation:4.4 only for the updating stability (there are some plot holes but they are not something to worry abt )
the fact that the amount of chapters is a little low, the story development is a little fast, the mc seems to have more plot armour then he should have, the mc is a little bit of an idiot, well overhaul is as well... world background, i mean four star as the author didnt create it but it is still good. overall it isnt to bad but i just am annoyed at the fact that overhaul is one of the most broken things in existence but it isnt used correctly even in a fanfic...
I seriously wanted to give this a chance since I rarely see crossover fanfictions with Overhaul, but I ended up disappointed by the lack of acceptable reasoning written for the MC's actions. Overall, it's just like any other wish fulfilment fanfictions.
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novel very good story I really like how you put work into the chapters you do thank you for everything and please don't stop your story like the others
Gostei[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
Like the concept the MC have the same power of Overhaul, i just don't like how the MC way of thinking (just my opinion) but the progress and the plot are interesting
Don't let the first few chapters discourage you. There might be typical cn novel lines, questionable decisions, and repetitive words in the beginning, but as it gradually goes on, you see it reduce and give a bit more focus on the actual cunning and development of the mc. It is an interesting concept in Suna too, and you dont need much knowledge of BNHA to enjoy this. By reading it all in one go, I was able to see the author's improvement with the writing quality and the decreasing amount of plot holes, indicating that the author likely also listens to productive suggestions and has a lot of potential to grow: both for this book and as a writer. Overall I found this a pleasant read. The later chapters(20-40s) were especially satisfying and I look forward to seeing which direction this goes. My only suggestions are to maybe edit the early chapters and give a bit more world building about the impact mc's choices made. Please keep up the steady pace.
Autor desvergonzado escribiendo su propia reseña ^_^. Estoy aquí por mi amigo, y estoy tratando de hacer un fanfic de Naruto. Cualquier crítica y sugerencia sería muy valorada. 1 mes
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começou muito bom, mas depois achei que sai muito fora de rumo, ficou estranho, nao e ruim so que meio que nao combina o personagem, eu particulamente nao irei mais ler mas a qualidade da escrita e tudo o mais e muito boa.
Till the end of the war I would have had no problems with this story and would recommend others to read it but how tsunade was recruited just was too unrealistic. not remembering the mc when they meet earlier that day I can overlook (on account of her grief) but having zero suspicion in the following time after when he’s doing exactly what she thinks Dan did (the thing she should be most paranoid of after such an event) is too much to ignore
ネタバレを明かす EXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREM EXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREM
There is usually at least one grammar/syntax related problem every chapter. The world background feels a bit rushed. Character design for main character is nice, others not so much. Story development is not that great. Spoilers: Konan randomly pulled from Ame to Suna with weak justifications and reasoning. Torturing Dan Kato part is unbelievable as he would never call an animal "Tsunade" even if it's that name. He would also not call his torturer hokage sama. You made an elite jonin turn into a civilian with his complete wimp mentality for torture that is...sexually alleviating?!?!? Chisaki being cruel is normal as he's just a child that wants revenge on and misplaced his hatred towards Konoha as a whole. The quirk is really badly used, as in he seems to have unlimited chakra to spread it hundreds of feet across an area. Have you even seen anyone release chakra into the environment? They get a sort of aura and it's never extending too far away from the body before dissipating or circulating back into the body. He has more chakra than Naruto and 8 gates Guy from how far his chakra can be spread without dissipating. Tsunade would not trust a young kid in a desert in a random cave. During the war, look at her interactions with the Ame orphans. Especially not after being betrayed by her most beloved. I could go on, but you get my point
ネタバレを明かす
Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please.
I'm disappointed, that's all I can say. .............................................................,,....................................................................
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Very interesting looking forward to the future plot. Like the fact it’s not kh khonoha sick of reading only about that village. ………………………….
I at first just liked the story but then something I found so funny happened and it was just great. .
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Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please.
author How weird is the plot Do not you think, work on MC and over minor characters and work on the plot Romance Add Pakura or OC to make MC a little softer MC got ruthless and it looks strange to me and to others too (think) and make the nickname a little original i have no idea and make a mask like the original chisaké it will look so cool lan come on author good luck on creating fanfiction
Re épico chavón, que crack no sé si sabes leer en español pero me encanta, sobre todo el personaje de chisaki al agregar trasfondo al chico, lo que soluciona mucho las cosas
this is the best please post more chapters quickly please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please
MC does not develop at all, but after the death of his father he becomes a complete psychopath. There are a lot of holes dug in the piece. I quit
great story the way how the mc is reincarnated into sand village with the powers of overhaul. Also the first fanfiction i red about mc being reincarnated in the sand village great story. also when is the next update author!!!
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WARNING I HAVEN'T FINISHED READING THE FANFIC YET I really don't like all these blushing faces....... better it not be a harem story..... if it's romance then it should be Konan no more- although I hate romance so much. the story is still so good! and I can't just leave it cause it's romance(maybe I'll do that if it's an average novel/fan-fic but not if it's...well... better than average? well, that doesn't applicate to harem fanfics/novels, cause I will not even bother reading the synopsis after seeing its tag...uhm "I'm the fated villain, ATG and the servant is a demon king " are an exception tho ). and Konan is one of my fav characters so far so i guess it's ok? evaluation:4.4 only for the updating stability (there are some plot holes but they are not something to worry abt )
the fact that the amount of chapters is a little low, the story development is a little fast, the mc seems to have more plot armour then he should have, the mc is a little bit of an idiot, well overhaul is as well... world background, i mean four star as the author didnt create it but it is still good. overall it isnt to bad but i just am annoyed at the fact that overhaul is one of the most broken things in existence but it isnt used correctly even in a fanfic...
I seriously wanted to give this a chance since I rarely see crossover fanfictions with Overhaul, but I ended up disappointed by the lack of acceptable reasoning written for the MC's actions. Overall, it's just like any other wish fulfilment fanfictions.
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novel very good story I really like how you put work into the chapters you do thank you for everything and please don't stop your story like the others
Gostei[img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend]
Like the concept the MC have the same power of Overhaul, i just don't like how the MC way of thinking (just my opinion) but the progress and the plot are interesting
Don't let the first few chapters discourage you. There might be typical cn novel lines, questionable decisions, and repetitive words in the beginning, but as it gradually goes on, you see it reduce and give a bit more focus on the actual cunning and development of the mc. It is an interesting concept in Suna too, and you dont need much knowledge of BNHA to enjoy this. By reading it all in one go, I was able to see the author's improvement with the writing quality and the decreasing amount of plot holes, indicating that the author likely also listens to productive suggestions and has a lot of potential to grow: both for this book and as a writer. Overall I found this a pleasant read. The later chapters(20-40s) were especially satisfying and I look forward to seeing which direction this goes. My only suggestions are to maybe edit the early chapters and give a bit more world building about the impact mc's choices made. Please keep up the steady pace.
Autor desvergonzado escribiendo su propia reseña ^_^. Estoy aquí por mi amigo, y estoy tratando de hacer un fanfic de Naruto. Cualquier crítica y sugerencia sería muy valorada. 1 mes
EXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREM EXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREM
começou muito bom, mas depois achei que sai muito fora de rumo, ficou estranho, nao e ruim so que meio que nao combina o personagem, eu particulamente nao irei mais ler mas a qualidade da escrita e tudo o mais e muito boa.
Till the end of the war I would have had no problems with this story and would recommend others to read it but how tsunade was recruited just was too unrealistic. not remembering the mc when they meet earlier that day I can overlook (on account of her grief) but having zero suspicion in the following time after when he’s doing exactly what she thinks Dan did (the thing she should be most paranoid of after such an event) is too much to ignore
ネタバレを明かす EXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREM EXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREMEXP EXP EXP MAKE IT A HAREM
There is usually at least one grammar/syntax related problem every chapter. The world background feels a bit rushed. Character design for main character is nice, others not so much. Story development is not that great. Spoilers: Konan randomly pulled from Ame to Suna with weak justifications and reasoning. Torturing Dan Kato part is unbelievable as he would never call an animal "Tsunade" even if it's that name. He would also not call his torturer hokage sama. You made an elite jonin turn into a civilian with his complete wimp mentality for torture that is...sexually alleviating?!?!? Chisaki being cruel is normal as he's just a child that wants revenge on and misplaced his hatred towards Konoha as a whole. The quirk is really badly used, as in he seems to have unlimited chakra to spread it hundreds of feet across an area. Have you even seen anyone release chakra into the environment? They get a sort of aura and it's never extending too far away from the body before dissipating or circulating back into the body. He has more chakra than Naruto and 8 gates Guy from how far his chakra can be spread without dissipating. Tsunade would not trust a young kid in a desert in a random cave. During the war, look at her interactions with the Ame orphans. Especially not after being betrayed by her most beloved. I could go on, but you get my point
ネタバレを明かす Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please.
I'm disappointed, that's all I can say. .............................................................,,....................................................................
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Very interesting looking forward to the future plot. Like the fact it’s not kh khonoha sick of reading only about that village. ………………………….
I at first just liked the story but then something I found so funny happened and it was just great. .
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Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please. Thank you for the chapter, Make a good harem please.
author How weird is the plot Do not you think, work on MC and over minor characters and work on the plot Romance Add Pakura or OC to make MC a little softer MC got ruthless and it looks strange to me and to others too (think) and make the nickname a little original i have no idea and make a mask like the original chisaké it will look so cool lan come on author good luck on creating fanfiction
Re épico chavón, que crack no sé si sabes leer en español pero me encanta, sobre todo el personaje de chisaki al agregar trasfondo al chico, lo que soluciona mucho las cosas
this is the best please post more chapters quickly please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please
MC does not develop at all, but after the death of his father he becomes a complete psychopath. There are a lot of holes dug in the piece. I quit