章 11: Their Choices
When Shen Qiang finished bathing, he saw how Li Caiyi was busying around the kitchen. He spotted an extra bag of groceries as well. She must have gone to the market while he was showering.
He silently tiptoed his way towards her. The oblivious Li Caiyi jumped in surprise when she saw Shen Qiang's fresh appearance suddenly pop out before her.
"You surprised me!" She exclaimed while putting her hand on her chest.
Shen Qiang chuckled. "Sorry. I was curious to see what you were doing. Did you go out shopping?"
She flashed him a beautiful smile. "Yes. I want to make a sumptuous meal for you, but the ingredients weren't enough, so I went down to buy some more."
"You don't have to do that. I'll be content even with just canned food."
"How can that be okay? This would be our last meal together. We should at least eat delicious food until we are full."
Shen Qiang's complexion turned cold after he heard her remarks. He thought she would falter after showing him her most vulnerable side of her, but it seemed she was earnest about this.
He secretly smiled to himself, feeling elated by the turn of events.
'I won't stop her if that's what she wants, then. We shall be together forever this way. She is mine even in her death.' Shen Qiang could barely hide his excitement.
Li Caiyi asked him if he wanted to cook together, and he happily accepted. Doing this felt like they were a married couple. The thought Made Shen Qiang's heart skip a beat.
She greeted him at the door when he came back from shopping, kindly prepared food for him, and even gave herself to him last night. He was thrilled.
Li Caiyi thought it would be fun if they cooked together, but who would have known that Shen Qiang was very terrible at this? He couldn't even crack an egg properly. The egg always somehow broke quickly in his hands, which ultimately caused a mess in the kitchen.
Later, when she asked him to cut the vegetables, he made a very unusual posture, and he scared her out of her wits with how he handled the knife. He cut vegetables like chopping firewood, and every strike could potentially cost him his hand.
Finally, Li Caiyi dared not let him touch anything. She tasked him to monitor the soup instead while she was busy with something else.
Shen Qiang obediently followed her order and watched over the pot of soup seriously. His figure looked a bit pitiful but funny simultaneously. Li Caiyi couldn't suppress her smile.
When you were doing something with someone you like, even the stupidest thing felt fun. Li Caiyi hummed jovially.
After some time, Li Caiyi finally finished and lined up the dishes with Shen Qiang's help. A delicious-looking Wonton soup, the assortment of steam buns with various filling, golden-colored scallion pancakes, and steamed egg were ready. Lastly, Li Caiyi arranged the mooncakes she bought on the plate before putting them on the table.
Truthfully, she wanted to make more, but she was afraid Shen Qiang couldn't finish it all, so she restrained herself and made a few simple dishes.
As for the mooncakes, she wished she had time to make it herself, but it would take more time, and she didn't want to make Shen Qiang wait for too long. However, she still wanted to buy it for him, considering the day.
"Why are you only standing there? Let's eat," Li Caiyi said. Shen Qiang snapped out of his daze, but he couldn't hide the trace of sorrow in his eyes immediately.
"Thank you," he said as he sat down. Li Caiyi stared at him and suddenly didn't know what to say. His expression had returned to normal, but she couldn't get his earlier expression out of her mind.
She recalled how bare his bedroom was. There was absolutely nothing related to his family being displayed, not even a photo. Li Caiyi wondered how bad his relationship was with his family, or even if he had any at all.
Whichever it was, she assumed that Shen Qiang must not have that many chances to taste homemade cooking. That's why he made such an expression earlier.
"This is very delicious!" He exclaimed excitedly after having a bite of the Wonton soup. He looked so happy as if his previous sadness just now was an illusion.
Li Caiyi's heart squeezed painfully, but she forced herself to smile. "Really? That's great!"
"I'm sorry I couldn't explain it in any other way than delicious, but I wasn't lying."
She chuckled. "It's not like you are a food critic or something. If you like it, then it's enough for me. Eat a lot, Shen Qiang."
He nodded and gobbled down his food like a starving beast. He was terrible at expressing himself, but his face gave it away.
Li Caiyi was surprised yet very content at the same time. It always felt good when you were appreciated for things you have put your effort into.
When they finished eating, Shen Qiang looked at the mooncake with a nostalgic look on his face. He noticed her staring and smiled weakly. "It's been years since I ate one, so I felt sentimental."
"Did you eat it with your family last time?"
"Yeah," There was an indescribable amount of bitterness in his voice, "But they were all gone now. Only I left."
Li Caiyi felt like a needle pricked her heart. "What happened?"
Shen Qiang shook his head, seemingly didn't want to continue this conversation. "No, it doesn't matter now. I'm sorry for making you worry. You should take a shower. Let me clean the dishes."
It was his way of telling her not to pry anymore, so Li Caiyi could only lower her head and go to the bathroom. She felt anxious, but if that were Shen Qiang's decision, then she wouldn't question him anymore.
After Li Caiyi finished taking a shower, she changed into the same clothes she wore the first time she came, then went out with Shen Qiang.
Their destination was obvious.
Shen Qiang clasped her hand the same way when he pulled her out of the abandoned building.
They entered the building without words and trudged to the topmost floor. Unlike the last time they came here, the weather was nice today.
They stood side by side, looking at the distant view. Even without a storm, the wind blew strongly up here. Li Caiyi could hear her trench coat fluttered around her. Beside her, Shen Qiang hadn't let go of her hand yet.
She stared at his side profile and almost couldn't stop herself from asking him to run away with her, to the place where there would only be the two of them.
However, she knew that they both had complicated reasons they couldn't do that. It wasn't like they had no reason to live anymore, but they had more reason to end everything right there and then.
Li Caiyi understood that feeling well, so she kept her mouth shut.
Suddenly, Shen Qiang turned to her and smiled charmingly. "It's a good day to die, isn't it?"
"Yes, it sure is."
Shen Qiang's hold on her hand got tighter. He looked at her intensely before he leaned down to kiss the back of her hand. "I love you."
Li Caiyi was startled by his sudden confession but later felt various emotions gush out of her heart simultaneously. It felt sweet yet painful at the same time. With a trembling voice, she answered, "Me too. I love you."
There was no need for further words. Both of them knew what was in each other's minds right now.
Shen Qiang forced out a smile, so it looked a bit twisted. "Li Caiyi, I'm such a horrible person. There are many things you don't know about me. You probably won't like me if you know how I truly am."
There he goes again. He always put on a confident front but backed out at the crucial moment.
'But that part of him is what I like about him. Because his hesitation always comes with his concern for me.'
Li Caiyi let out an angry huff. "You have brought me this far. Are you going to shirk your responsibility now? You also don't know how dark I am, yet you still offered to accompany me. Did you forget that?"
"But… it might be better if you…."
"Shut up. I will let no one decide for me anymore," Li Caiyi noticed his sad look, so she softened her tone. "I had made a promise to you. I will always stay by your side."
Shen Qiang's pupils trembled ever so slightly. He pulled her into his embrace. She raised her arms and wrapped them around his back. "Shen Qiang, don't worry about me. I know what's best for me."
"Yes, I'm sorry. I'm being unreasonable now." He pulled out from the embrace and pressed her shoulders lightly. His previous hesitation had long gone and replaced with a firm gaze. "Li Caiyi, come with me. Even if the place we would go to is different, I promised I would find you no matter what it takes."
Li Caiyi had already cried before she knew it.
After this one last answer, everything would end. Both for her and Shen Qiang. Nevertheless, she strangely wasn't afraid at all.
"Yes, take me with you. Never leave me alone."
Shen Qiang kissed her forehead gently, as though he were a devout believer worshipping his goddess. Li Caiyi's tears rolled down her cheeks when she felt warmth radiating from the soft contact of his lips. Then he pulled her into his embrace again.
Li Caiyi closed her eyes peacefully with a smile adorning her face.
Even when the gravity pulled both of them downwards, there was no fear. The only thing in her mind was Shen Qiang.
If there was a next life, please let her meet him again.
If she could be given a chance to reunite with him, please let her meet him faster next time.
So she could live again…
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