章 35: Omake 3:The Banker and the Professor (1)
"This was the tricky bit. The really tricky bit, trickiness cubed." – Hugh Laurie, The Gun Seller
I stared at the ceiling with a distracted look.
I was still trying to make sense of the multidimensional shenanigan that just ripped me off from my new home and right into this similar but still different world.
Things happened, I was unsure how much madness had unfolded after my arrival, but now I was there to handle one of the strangest scenes I could've been left to deal with.
The modest room was fitted for the main purpose it had. A wooden desk, several bookshelves filled with Psychology-related books, and… comics. Lots of comics.
A therapist's office… and I was the patient of this curious 'doctor'.
I mean, is he actually a doctor? Can we consider him one?
I think professors, and Headmasters, can fit the role if it is about students. We are a unique case to begin with, so maybe this unorthodox approach isn't that bad.
[Really unique.]
I was already lying on the sofa when I saw the owner of this place, a blond young man with blue eyes, enter the room with a clipboard filled with multiple layers of paper.
He paused for a moment to quickly take note of my presence before giving a nod to his assistance, a girl with pink and brown hair that had been ignoring my staring as she was busy giving a snack to her… Pet Nevermore.
Yep, this is happening.
"Mr. Bukharin," Jaune Arc, Headmaster of Beacon, greeted with a neutral tone, his stare forcefully aimed at his empty papers. "I hope you understand that your arrival led to some awkward situations with… well, most of the world."
I slumped a little at that comment. "It couldn't have been that bad."
"It… wasn't. Well, Ironwood would want that to be the case since he believes you to be… 'worse than Ozpin'."
Frowning at that, I allowed myself just a moment to cross my arms close to my chest.
"That sounds like a lot of bogus to me. I know he is paranoid but… that actually hurts."
He shrugged. "Not my words, just the General being… well, the usual."
"Fair enough," I conceded with a nod. I could see that being a really tough situation to handle on a normal basis. And I was far from normal. "Still, I'm actually surprised that you tackled the matter so eagerly."
"I've fixed Ozpin's and Salem's feud. Well, kind of- but the point is, I've dealt with worse."
I hummed in agreement. "Still, I'm a little worse than them since I know how you work this stuff."
Jaune looked perplexed, his blue eyes flashing concern.
"Shouldn't that actually make things easy?"
Technically yes, practically… it depends on the circumstance.
[And on the fact that you want or not to answer some of his questions.]
"I suppose," I ultimately replied, preparing for quite the arduous therapy session… that was actually meant to prove my 'innocence'.
"Okay then, we can start from the very beginning."
I nodded in agreement.
"Mr. Bukharin- John, you are not originally from Remnant. Is that correct?"
"Yes."
He scribbled something in his papers before going for the next question.
"And you've adamantly refused to give any details about your home country. Can you at least provide for a reason for doing so?"
I blinked, pondering about the motivation for a moment and… I sighed.
"It's mostly because my home is inconsequential as of now. It's beyond Remnant and, as far as I know, I can prove its existence with good proof."
"Yet you're here. And we know you weren't here to begin with because of… my former clients' affirmations."
Man, it was awkward finding Mami Salami flirting with poor Oscar this early in this insane development.
Only awkward?
[I mean, I can see why she would tease the cute boy this much-]
No, I refuse to-
This is so wrong on multiple levels. I don't understand why my other self would do such a thing.
"Just because I have two nutjobs inside my head, it doesn't mean much."
Instead of going ahead and rebuking that negative way to address my enforced 'mindmates', the Headmaster merely nodded while writing more notes.
"It can be quite a tiring experience to be around Ozpin from time to time… same for Salem," Jaune elaborated with a sympathetic tone. "Are you sure that… you don't need something about your current condition?"
[I think I should feel aggravated.]
I am aggravated. And irritated… and vexed.
"No, it's alright. I've got a sturdy brain."
He cracked a smile at that response, yet the little moment of understanding faltered as the conversation shifted to other topics.
"You said that you were attacked early on by bandits, and then you were taken in by… Menagerie?" The blond paused for a moment, shuffling some papers back in a brief state of confusion, only to calm down when he found what he was looking for. "Oh right, you came from a dimension in which the 'timeline' is twelve years in the past from now."
"Both statements are correct," I confirmed, advancing the session to the next step.
"Okay, now I want to ask you about your emotions when both events transpired. How were you feeling during the attack, and then how did you feel when you woke up and learned that you were saved by the White Fang?"
Uh, this is getting tough alright. But nothing to truly worry about… just yet.
"I… I remember feeling rather frightened by the prospect of dying and- I think I've mentioned that two kids had 'entered my life' a little before the bandit ordeal, right?"
"You did. Please, continue."
"I was worried that if I stopped the truck even for just a moment, if I died in that moment now that there were other lives on the stake, I wouldn't have ever forgiven myself for it," I explained truthfully. "It… It was tough at first. We were chased for a good portion of the forest I was moving through and… then she was there."
Blue eyes glinted interest at the final comment. "She?"
Feeling some hesitation building up, I actually kept quiet for a moment as I prepared to deliver that very situation out without making it sound any more awkward than I could remember it being.
"The bandits were led by… Raven Branwen. She was rather aggressive in her pursuit and, in an effort to kill me and stop the truck, she jumped through the driver's window and tried to stab me."
Jaune nodded. "I suppose you dodged in time."
…
"John? Is something wrong?"
I blinked, feeling my brain rebooting at those words.
"I… Sorry, I was just thinking back at that predicament. I kind of forgot how close I came to die."
[Don't stress yourself. Jaune said you don't need to answer if you don't feel it.]
"So, she actually succeeded with her attack."
"Partially," I admitted. "She almost cut my arm off with that assault, and I was lucky enough that it didn't cut more or else it would've been amputated."
The blond flinched at that unpleasant retelling.
"I was lucky enough that the shotgun was near my other arm, or else I would've died a brutal death."
"Yes, about that. When you mentioned this situation, you said that you said something… odd."
I frowned.
Odd?
Oh- Now I remember.
[Hehehehehe~!]
What are you two talking about?
"Odd? The only thing I remember saying was 'Begone Thot' and-" I paused as soon as I heard someone crash at listening to my words.
Neo was struggling to not fall off her chair, with her face turning red in a silent chuckle.
"Sorry, she is… actually, she is always like that. It's her-"
"Normal self," I concluded for him with a sympathetic smile. "I know that, Jaune."
He sighed. "Is there something you don't know?"
…
I smiled deviously. He looked nervous at this.
"Have you two made… steps in the serious direction?"
Just as I said this, I saw the door crashing down to reveal a rather annoyed Cinder Fall.
"They have not. Jaune is well beyond her attempts at-"
"Hello Cinder," I greeted calmly, staring at her with a mirthful tone.
The young woman paused, her lone eye locking onto my face as a smirk slowly formed at my amiable voice.
"John Bukharin, I've heard some interesting things about you."
"I'm sure you did," I returned with a shrug.
Jaune interrupted with a sigh. "Cinder, this is a private session."
"I was merely correcting your patient about one of his misconceptions."
I frowned. "I'm quite sure of what I've said. But perhaps you failed to see what kind of argumentation I was going for."
…
Her eyes widened, and her smirk renewed at that ambiguous response of mine. "I see… Well, I suppose I should leave you to your session. Apologies, Mr. Bukharin."
"It's alright. By the way, would you mind if we shared some words? About your younger self."
She narrowed her eyes at the topic, but her mind swiftly provided her a reason to trust me as I seemed a 'mastermind' that only wanted to aid her younger self.
Oh, the mind games are strong in this deranged Cinder.
Her delusions are… quite stable.
[I think you misspelled 'Unstable'.]
I didn't. She might be partly insane… but it is more of a permanent coping system that gets her to think and act like this.
"I would be more than happy to talk with you after the session."
And with those words, the dark-haired woman left the room, closing the door behind her.
…
"Are you sure you want to talk to her?"
"I think I know how to speak with her without risking death," I replied with a quiet voice. "Either that, or I will keep Pyrrha around."
The headmaster looked uneasy at the calm I was displaying.
"You know, now I can see why Ironwood saw you as another Ozpin."
I take offense to that.
Yeah.
"Well, I suppose we could-" A strange noise started to be played by his Scrolls, something that reminded me of an alarm. "It would seem like our time for this session is over."
I frowned. "So soon?"
"It's… I have a lot of work to go through, and I can't spare too much on each session. There will be multiple of those, at least as many as it will take for us to understand how we can bring you back to your Remnant."
Nodding, I offered the man a smile as I stood up from the couch and offered him a handshake.
"Thank you."
He accepted it. "It's alright, John. I'm sure you will make it back home very soon."
I hoped that too.
"If you leave the office, Glynda will be waiting there to escort you to your living quarters."
"Understood," I replied calmly. "Also, good luck with the paperwork."
He groaned at the reminder of his next task, and I was reminded how tough his current job is.
But before I left the room, I decided to give a try to something I had thought of trying.
"See you too, Neo."
Despite her previous disinterest, the young woman actually waved at me as I left the room.
I suppose I did give her something worthy of attention for the time being.
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