章 3: EARLY CHILDHOOD AND EDUCATION
Her first encounter with formal education was dramatic as she refused letting go of her mother's hand, wailing, yelling and eventually creating a scene in front of her school gate. After much coxing Nkoli finally lets go of her mother's hand and is welcomed by her very first school teacher miss Peggy. Mrs Peggy was a middle aged woman with a motherly vibe, with a circular rim glasses that sat in her nose and a smile that always reached her eyes. In playgroup two green it was all joy, wonder and possibilities as Mrs Peggy was committed in ensuring that the class was like an extended family. Snack time and rhyme times were Nkoli's favourite because she could do no wrong. Finishing playgroup two was bitter sweet for Nkoli as mrs peggy gave all her student a warm hug and they recited their affirmation one last time as a family. Nkoli remembers Mrs Peggy's parting words everything is possible. aunty Edna in nursery one. School life was good as far as she could tell at least till primary one when the side comments, name calling and stupid comparisons started. Aunty Mary was her teacher's name. The conversation which remains till this day engraved in her brain went thus;
Aunty Mary [to another student]…. Esther come and carry this olodo and go and teach her
Aunty Mary [to Nkoli]….. Olodo simple math you cannot do, come on get out of my sight
At the end of that school day not only was she called an olodo by her teacher but same teacher went on to tell a different teacher that Nkoli was dumb and therefore was the wife of a then mischievous and according to her teacher dumb student named Isaac . According to her they were both compatible because they were both dumb and used glasses. Ooh ooh not this, not again, not at school too. She already felt worthless at home, school was supposed to be her safe haven but aunty Mary seemed to derive joy from comparing her to Esther her supposedly more brilliant family friend.
It would be years later before she realised that as the saying goes broken people break people and hurting people hurt others and aunty Mary was no exception having being a victim of domestic violence from an unhappy childless marriage. Having visited different prayer houses being flogged and traumatized in the process her action towards Nkoli were nothing more than misplaced frustration and a cry of helplessness.
Primary two wasn't any better as her new teacher wasn't any different from the former.
Her new teacher Mrs Hanna was a tall light skin beautiful lady with brown eyes and shiny dark hair. There's this thing about her, her voice could make just about anybody listen, except of course when she yells in which instance she sounded like a witches bird. But like any beauty Mrs Hanna has just one fatal flaw which is her weaponised tongue which could destroy a self-esteem that took nothing less than seven years to build, like when she asked my class mate joseph if his brain was hollow from birth or his ancestry was always deaf all because he had spaced out during a class and wrongfully answered a question when called of his trance. Fortunately for Nkoli, though unknown to her at the time Nkoli would change schools in primary three and would go on to meet Mr Badamosi who would try to draw her out of her shell and help her understand that brilliance is relative. Was a kind but firm teacher who not only saw students for where they were but where they could be with proper guidance and support.
The remaining three years of her primary school education was not all joyful but she would go on to win an award and see herself in a new light academically . She was never one for many friends little wonder she still remembers the name of her primary school friend Lesley. Lesley was an amazing friend who kept the voices in Nkoli's head at bay with her random acts of kindness and generally just being there, she would listen and help her out the best way she knew how.
She was the first friend to ever get Nkoli a birthday present an act which in itself had never happened before.
Though they ended up sharing the present she may never know that this singular action of hers made Nkoli feel special, loved, seen and appreciated, because prior to that time birthdays for Nkoli was just acknowledged by her family without any other persons involvement, this reoccurrence brought about the joke that she was stolen from a shrine whom now sought revenge by killing people on her birthday and as a result were able to celebrate her on her birthdate. At this point Nkoli has started engaging the voices in her head which had always encouraged her to do things which at the time though she didn't know would have amounted to her ending her life. Like the day she was tempted to jump into a well because according to the voices in her head she would be one with the water and her misery would come to an end, all the solutions to her problems laid at the bottom of the well, so they said. The voices were relentless and another time suggesting she locks herself in fridge and find rest. But at every turn in the dark alleys of her mind Lesley's voice bounce off the walls and echoes in her head saying I LOVE YOU and YOU WILL DO GREAT THINGS. Acting as an anchor to Nkoli's drifting souls Lesley's act of kindness and love would eventually pull Nkoli from the clutches of despair many years after both have gone their separate ways.
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