章 47: Find the Reason
Inside Jomel Soul-Space, Jomel and Motus were facing each other.
He was looking at jomel with eagerness and hunger.
"RE HEH! HEH! HEH! HEH!"
Motus scary red eyes and silver hair were oozing with dark red-violet and darkness.
"So pitiful my master REHEHEHEHE.."
To jomel, Motus was scarier right now than the Six-Armed gorilla.
But he is Holding-on he is looking for his real answer.
To be strong or the strongest.
"The only answer to your question my human master.."
SWOSHHH!
Motus scary face came near to his shoulder...
"RE HE HE HE HE ..."
Slowly Scary face Motus approached him to his ear.
"Is to The desire for power and become the strongest..!"
Jomel was stunned for a moment because he had no idea how to do that.
He is not craving for power.
Ever since his sister Huong faded and gone, he has forgotten all his desire.
Power? What is that?
But he is still curious.
So he asked" How do I do that..? I have no desire?! I just wanna live that's why I beg you.."
Yes, he just wants to live for a moment and doesn't like to perish.
That's why he asked.
"RE HE HE HE you have no motivation my master do you know what is the secret..?!"
Jomel nodded intensely.
"It is to accept evil..!"
Inside the Soul-Space of Jomel, TaoTierus was looking at the interaction between the two.
He just sighed with disappointment.
There's no problem with being scared in order to keep one's own life.
But he can't do anything about what he hated, the human and being here.
Especially that Corrupted monster who was corrupting his own master.
This guy probably wants to control the owner.
He wouldn't blame him if that guy was not here, he was probably the one who will do that.
Without caring Taotierus and Decided not to delve into this moment.
And focus on his evolution instead, he will help the owner once he really is in the predicament.
He turned his three heads, to avoid witnessed the two.
He just sigh that hell is controlled by that monster once that guy was corrupted.
In order to be useful and make it alive, he began to continue what he is doing earlier.
To evolve.
Back to the two.
"Within you my great master, there is an evil waiting for you to unleashed..!"
Motus was now on his right track.
Be is going to succeed.
"Just let the evil within you accept who you are and what will you become.."
He then stopped talking but keep looking at Jomel with his eyes shining with red light.
Jomel on the other hand was so absent-minded.
"Look within him, his heart his desire..!? "
What is his desire?!
Those forgotten desires?
A desire that is hiding deep within him?
Is it evil, rip someone apart, kill them while they are wailing with anger..!?
What's so good about being evil with no purpose but to kill.
Yes, it may satisfy him but having that kind of purpose is not what he wanted.
So...
It's a no!
To become the strongest being, so no one would ever trouble you..!?
There's a lot of being in there probably greater than he is.
In time, especially now when there is ranking for power.
Level up for power.
So his answer...
It's a no also!
To fight for glory for fame and enjoy it..?!
People will forget everything you did someday, it is good a first.
But his favorite band the linkin park in the past hit him hard.
It doesn't matter how you end up, no matter how great you are.
Because in the end, it doesn't even matter!
Chest*r may have fans but, is he his fans?
No.
He is not.
So why did he commit suicide..?
Jomel didn't know so he dismissed the idea of fame.
To be recorded in history books..?
No matter how great you are or how good you did, people always have something to say to you.
Women..!?
It was also a no!
Being with women especially beautiful woman is good.
But beauty fades with age, Jomel knew that.
He also had several girlfriends, he searched for the internet on how to do it.
At first, it was exciting, delicious, and refreshing.
After being denied by a lot of women, he will get the prettiest one.
But after a year of being with a girl, he realized that it is only to feed his lust.
And eventually, he will get tired.
He thought having a beautiful woman is the answer to his loneliness but its not.
It is not truly what he wanted.
A pretender act as a sage?
And like he knows everything?
As long as possible he won't act like that.
But that's not him, that's not his life.
His purpose?
Does he even have one?
For his little sister..?!
He knew that she was gone.
Even if he tried to find ways to revive her, there's no way that's possible.
Her soul probably was gone and she didn't have anything on him.
Only memories!
Then jomel suddenly questioned himself.
Why would he fight for her? Is she going to be happy once she found out about his situation?
Does he not have a life..?!
Is the not giving a second chance?!
To find his purpose?!
But what is it?
And then Jomel heard motus voice.
"Seek for evil and conquer everyone my master RE HE HE HE HE!..."
The mind of jomel who was confused about everything suddenly buzzed.
He remembered something...
"Brother, Why do you like battling games all the time, not romance..?"
It was Huong when she was young.
Her sister asked her this question.
"Nothing little sister, I just like the thrill.." Jomel casually replied to his little sister Huong.
"Okay... I'm gonna go now.. but big bro..!"
Her sister said bye because she's going to school with her friends.
When she has gone out to the door and left with her little friends, jomel stopped playing and dropped his controller.
He is lying to himself and her sister.
Jomel was bullied at school by older people.
He was just ten while those peeps who bullied him are all sixteen up.
And he hates his parents because of that.
They taught me how to be good, to be respectful to people older than you.
That's why he never fought back.
That's why he truly hated them to his core, when Huong left the world he ignored them completely.
He hated them not just because of what happened to Huong.
He hated them because...
Why his parents never taught him how to fight back?
Why only taught how to be respectful and be a good boy..!?
He keeps asking why!!??
He could've killed those bullies at least, so even if he went to jail it is okay.
At least he took their life.
But there's no internet at that time, he is clueless about everything in life.
He is taught that it is not okay to kill not to fight back because it is bad.
Although he hated his parents, he didn't blame them because he knew that they are bad parents.
If he goes back to the time when he was younger, he could have told his younger self to kill them, and it's okay.
But when he grew up, he is bigger than his bullies.
His body is much more muscle pack, due to overworking refusing help from his parents as long as he can.
The bullies in his childhood avoid making eye contact with him, whenever they see him.
If he was in the past he could've smacked them without reason at all.
But they are now grown up, they are respectful to him.
He disdains hurting someone without fighting back, plus because of the death of his little sister.
He never cared anymore about those bullies.
Like a puppet, of society that most people experienced in life.
He is unmotivated, like a zombie doing his everyday repetitive life.
He wants to get out, go to a world of magic and wonderful things!
But not as much as he wants it to be.
There's something missing inside of him.
That he cannot find or hope to find, that made him feel incomplete.
His sister's death only made it more hidden!
His mind became chaotic but he stopped caring.
Thinking about it.
About everything.
No direction to life, his hobby is just playing after work.
Back to the present.
AAANNGGHHH!!
ROAR!!!
He ignored the rumbling of the beast outside.
This time he was looking for enlightenment!
He was searching!
Searching for something he is clueless of.
Strong? What he seeks?
Seek of something...
Seek of something...
Seek of something...
Seek deep within his heart?
Whats in his heart?...
Whats in his heart?...
Whats in his heart?
Is it truly to be strong..?
What reason?
Reason...
Reason...
Reason?
What could it be to be strong?
Why be strong?
The reason...
-
-
-
-
-
is his heart.!!
Suddenly, his eyes opened!
Red light shines on it!
Jomel is enlightened!
It was full of hope and satisfaction like he saw his way!
His path!
His reason!
And his reason..?
His heart to be...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
Jomel smiled while his eyes are closed.
His smile is calm but fierce and strong at the same time.
It was oozing with confidence.
Motus was shocked!
He didn't know if he should be happy or not.
His expectation of Jomels emotion
and expression seems similar but different.
But he knew that this...
This is not a person who had fallen from grace!
But what could it be..?
-- 贈り物
が届きました