章 31: Satan Bellamy
After Barak Obomer recovered his breathing capabilities from laughing so hard he did one final tour of barak before leaving to explore the world, he's been reborn as a prankster thanks to me. Several residents of Barak actually recognised the boy and were sad about his parents deaths.
When they learned the truth of the incident the bad relations between the government and Barak only increased. The merchants who used Barak to make a fortune in the past were filled with righteous anger about what happened so jacked up the prices for the government. Obomer intends to use those connections to start making cash, his training that the government gave him and insight into how cypher pole operates will let him avoid capture.
I recommended he make contact with the revolutionary army. On a later date he would make that connection before being interrogated by belo Betty about what her son has been upto, the paper began calling him a demon so knowing the government he may actually be a saint. But when she learned he has a harem of women and loves committing acts of terror to individuals who pissed him off she didn't know what to feel, so she called her mother but that's for later.
The metallix pirates stayed on Barak for one week before leaving to retrieve their last needed part for Bellamy's dream ship. It happens to be their next location before Water 7.
The next island is known as Harambolo, another anti government island that is actually led by under world crime families. Bellamy had fought some from north and west blue during his training so he got to learn about this island.
The intent behind this trip is to acquire Star cannons to arm his ship with. The island of Harambolo resembles Naples and is of course filled with men wearing suits who spend their days smoking away and standing behind an older gentlemen who speaks in a raspy tone of voice.
What Bellamy found funny is the locals all have a monkey style hair cut with their sideburns being curly and the colour of their hair being mostly brown. Bellamy smacked Gimlet on the back "brat you'll fit right in here, everyone else is a smelly ape that likes throwing their own shit~"
"Ukikiki shut it! I hope you slip on someone's banana Captain Bella bitch!" He retorted not realising a malevolent deity was standing behind him... his mother who just caught her son swearing. The crew laughed as Russian dragged away her son to deliver a haki infused spanking.
*caw Caw* the crowing Of the news coo sounded out, carina flashed and grabbed herself today's paper wanting to the see the results. Based on how the bird was giving a mild glare to Bellamy the results should be good.
The title was "Satan bellamys acts of aggression" which then went into great detail about all the "attacks" that Bellamy committed. Numerous cases of chemical warfare, sexual assault, kidnapping, cannibalism, murder of a celestial dragon, infiltrating government facilities, provoking a warlord through sexual harassment and provoking two emperors.
The crew were dying reading about the aftermath, Sengoku is now bald because he had to "purge what was tainted" according to marine staff testimony of when they rescued him. Some Okama jizzed in his Afro so he shaved the entire thing off afterwards and had not left the therapist and his personal bathhouse since.
The reporter who gathered the footage was in a similar debacle as after the okama finished of beady chan they turned on "blue tit boya" as he was nicknamed. Morgan's plucked out his feathers that were tainted the next day.
Nothing was written about Akainu except that several merchants that crossed his path as he left mariejois spotted brown patches coating his upper body, he had to kick off all the mud on that dragoness.
Doffy shot any reporter she found after they took pictures off the women's gift basket addressed to her. Magellan was demoted due to "public indecency"'which means they covered up that he nuked the fountain in marine ford. The funeral listings for marine ford were a lot higher this week in the paper showing the results.
Big mom has now started attacking Shanks territory to "reclaim her new man". Shanks has lost his usual laid back persona and has adopted a more angry/ frightful one when linlin is mentioned.
The final article about my acts of terror was the several page long description about that dragon I fed to big mom. I refuse to remember that shitstains name but the paper was filled with pages upon pages about "the fallen hero" and lists his many "achievements".
"Shitting yourself infront of the reverie and then blaiming it on a princess isn't a fucking achievement" I shouted reading this list of lies. The paper then continued talking shit about me until I found my new bounty.
{Satan Bellamy—— 3,500,000,000 berry}. My eyes bulged at the figure. I turned and saw Carina panting whilst looking at the picture of me. It showed me standing in the destruction of jaya after fighting Teach so my battle tested body was on display. My fan club is sure to skyrocket even further now.
The others in the crew did not receive a bounty increase much to their dismay. Obomer was also granted one due to the severity of his crimes. The fact that his epithet is "President" really made my head spin.
After recovering from today's paper across the world people read about what happened. Among the marines even Garp refused to laugh after learning about what happened. He felt that should he laugh at beady——- at sengoku he may be the next if Bellamys shit list.
Kuzan last reported in from long ring island dying of laughter after he read today's paper. Borsalino sat across from Garp sweating due to how hard he is containing his laughter. Gion is sharpening her sword leaking a purple aura because of how Bellamy dropped a bomb on her whilst she was changing.
Tsuru just sat there calm as a river yet her eyes showed that they lacked a soul. To big a shock for her over what's happened in recent times. Her long time friend was outed as an Okama, she's shook his hand before!!!! She feels disgusted with herself.
Sakazuki was fuming as usual but his suits seemed to have all been replaced, instead of his usual crimson attire it was instead burnished meaning it was partially brown. Almost as if it was referencing something, he had nothing else to wear due to his size being hard to cater too on short notice.
Sengoku sat in the centre of the room in white monk robes. His bald head reflecting any light that passed it, Borsalino should really stop pointing at it and seeing how it reflects. On Sengokus Lap is a goat who had been munching on pictures of Bellamy non stop, it's all that Sengoku has been feeding it!!
Sengoku opened his eyes "the marines have never faced such a dire situation in their long history. An ancient evil has manifested itself in the form of a pirate who has been carving his way through the grand line." Sengoku announced addressing the room filled with admirals of all levels. Some were sweating as they causing process the abrupt changes in their upper management lately.
Garp was enjoying the power point of bellamys actions for the most part, it would have been perfect if not for the first photo to have been him being punched in the sack!
Sengoku continued displaying crime scenes of what the metallix pirates have created. He then spoke again "the marines need to make a grand move to restore our honour!"
Someone muttered "because he'll never get his chastity back!" The top level people heard that whisper so Garp and kizaru nearly popped a blood vessel restraining their laughter. Sengoku and Akainu began glowing in rage.
The fleet admiral continued "Edward D teach captured Portgas D Ace and delivered him to us. The battle cause teach to lose a crewmember and sustain heavy injuries. He wants the warlord title so we'll give him crocodiles." This was met with mummers from the crowd.
" fire fist Ace will be executed publicly, this is to draw out Whitebeard and finish him off!" Someone snickered at "finish off" causing the hateful glow to increase.
"With Satan Bellamy achieving a billions bounty he qualifies as a yonko level threat. His haki has reached their stage as confirmed from several sources, his crew members also include several powerful individuals with high connections such as former queen Quetzalcoatl!"
"Bellamy's presence has upset the delicate balance therefore we must remove one emperor lest all hell break loose. The fact that two emperors are at odds makes it the perfect opportunity to finish off either kaido or Newgate."
Sengoku continued his speech and revealed his plan to kill whitebeard. As he was finishing up a communications officer stormed in.
"Fleet admiral! It's terrible! Satan Bellamy was just crowned the big banana off Harambolo and Straw Hat luffy has been reported to be at odds with CP9!"
Garp just thought to himself "what the fuck is even going on anymore!"
The officer then continued "a world noble has also made a personal call to admiral Sakasuki demanding his presence. Also here is a den den mushi connected with an envoy of a nation looking to speak with you urgently!" Sakazuki growler before leaving the room quickly.
Sengoku nodded before opening the snail infront of everybody. Garp had a bad feeling but also felt this may be hilarious.
*kacha* "this is fleet Admiral Sengoku! Who am I addressing?"
"Yahallo~ this is Puri Puri Prisoner~ is that you Beady chwan~. Blue tit boya~ said this is how we can find you. New Kambaka is considering joining the government. Our only demand is you~".
Sengoku spat blood and declared "God is dead!" Before passing out. "Ara? Did Beady chan have a nose bleed again? He gets those a lot, he needs a protein refill~" spoke the snail. Garp watched as Sengoku's body began to spasm in fear.
He picked up the snail and spoke "the terms are agreeable, please hold as we discuss a meeting time and place to address your conscription to the world government." Like a real vice admiral he spoke with authority.
The voice then began to distort "Nah that's cool, just wanted to twist the knife a little more. See ya later Old Gorilla."
"Bellamy! You bastard!" Screamed Gion recognising the voice on the other end that hung up. Did he call just to kill Sengoku with a fear induced heart attack? He really is much more evil, whilst all the other people in the room either tried to help Sengoku or figure out how Bellamy got those secure lines.
Garp looked at Tsuru with a look that said "hey? Is it time for us to jump ship?"
Tsuru closed her eyes before shrugging her shoulders as if she's just given up. The marines are just being harassed on the daily and have proven useless in recent times. The government was always a pain in the ass for both of them and their families had been split apart by their decisions to stay in the marines.
Perhaps Garp should just choose to save Ace then blow this joint.
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